Disclaimer: I do not own anything from the book series, "A Song of Ice and Fire". I had an idea for a fic, and I wrote it down, and here you go. This is a Catelyn Stark/Stannis Baratheon fic, with some Davos too. So, if you haven't read past the first book, this might contain spoilers, just as if you haven't watched past the first season of "Game of Thrones".
Stannis Baratheon stood alone; his gaze stared at nothing as his heart yearned for nothing. For the moment, he was so very alone. As he closed his eyes, he heard Davos speak, but he did not hear the words—not quite, no. He held the pendent in his hand, it was a fish. A fish upon a metal pin. Why would he carry such things in the middle of a battle? He told himself he did not know. That he cared for fish no more. The Tullys were weak, and they spent too much time to themselves. But Stannis was not a fool; he knew the reality of things. His heart still remembered his younger years, when he pined for Catelyn Tully in silence. He had a wife now, and he had his ships. He did not pine for Catelyn Stark. She was Ned Stark's widow, and she had five children by the wolf. She would not think of him in that way, she would resent him if she knew—as she has resented Petyr Baelish.
Even if he had given her the flower, and named her the Queen of love and beauty, she would have still resented him. He would not have treated her with disrespect as Robert did, he would not have whisked her away as Rhaegar had. He would have courted her, with dignity and courtesies.
His bitter stare left nothing, and went to Davos, "What is it?" His voice sharper than he intended, and his eyebrows narrowed. Stannis was not cold though….was he? He was not Lord Tywin, or any of the Lions that fed off Stags. His thoughts were dashed away when Davos' stare was not at Stannis, but at the pendent that Stannis held.
"Is that a fish, your grace?" Davos looked at him with raised eyebrows.
He looked at his pendent again, and frowned slightly, "Yes. It's the sigil…for the Tullys." He knew that his friend had not asked that though. That stare stayed with the pendent, his fingers closed around it. He did not look at Davos again. But he walked over to the chest and slid a small thread of leather out, and slid the fish pendent onto it. He pulled the leather over his head, and slid the fish pendent into his shirt.
Catelyn had given him such a pendent years back, many summers ago, when she still faired as Catelyn Tully, not Stark. She had smiled more then, and had become accustom to attempt to make Stannis Baratheon smile. She had succeeded a few times, though they too were rare as his laughs. She had long hair, and wore blue, and smiled. Catelyn would sometimes even teach him things that he had thought no need for.
His father had said it would be good, to know Catelyn Tully. He was not sure why his father said such things. Catelyn had though taught him to fish properly, and he remembered her hands, and the way she laughed when he fell backwards, onto the ground. The way her hair was…He could remember that day more than any day, of the late at least. Stannis would by no means confess to being slightly upset at the idea of her being wedded to Brandon Stark, a marriage that never happened but followed by she married Ned Stark.
Davos said nothing, he was silent.
"I can hear you judging." Stannis finally spoke again, and stood up properly. He looked at the man he called his hand, the man he trusted most. Davos, who was loyal and would do anything for him. Davos, the man who did not trust the Priestess.
"I do not judge you, your grace."
Stannis shook his head, and walked to the table where the map of Westeros was. His eyes glanced at King's Landing, then at the Riverlands, and Casterly Rock. He would rule the realm, and he would not be his brother. He would be a just, civil king. He brushed his fingers over where Robb Stark's men were. He pulled his hand away quickly though, as if fire had struck him.
"Your grace?" Davos was right beside him.
"It was nothing." That was a lie.
"Is this about Lady Stark, your grace?"
"This has nothing to do with Lady Stark. It is about her son, and the bastard on the Iron Throne." He said with a stronger tone then, not as soft as before. His hands flat on the table, he only glanced in his hand's direction then away, at the map again, "Robb Stark and Joffery are fighting me, and Renly is playing battle with that Knight of his." Stannis shook his head,
"I cannot do this all and think of Lady Stark."
"You said you were not thinking of her." Davos pointed out.
"I am not." Stannis shook his head. He sighed, and then placed his hand upon where Robb Stark's men were, "Lady Stark made her choice." His other hand, without any real thought to it, went where Renly was, "She chose her side in this." He nodded, and yet his heart nearly fluttered and stomach churned. He felt disgusted with himself. He remembered the red hair of Tullys, but it was not the Tullys he saw now, it was Catelyn. His eyes froze over the map, and it was quiet.
When was the last time he simply called her Catelyn? So many winters ago, it felt like ages. He shook his head once more, placed his hand over King's Landing. His eyes then went to Davos, "Do you think I care for Lady Stark?"
"It isn't in my place to think much of anything, your grace."
"That did not stop you before." Was he trying to prove a point? To make himself feel less guilty, for the thoughts he had, the dreams—No. This was not about Lady Stark; this had nothing to do with her. Catelyn was a Stark of Winterfell; she had gone out of her way to prove that.
Stannis looked at the map, and pulled his hands away from it, his hands at his sides.
"Lady Stark is a brave woman."
"Yes…"Stannis agreed, whispering as if afraid the winter might hear.