A/N: This is a story from several years ago that I posted and many people seemed to like. When I went back and looked at it, however, I realized that I can do much better. This is edited, with maybe a little added here and there to make it read smoother. Fair warning, this is going to have elements of Jack/Sam, and Daniel/Janet. Also, TGeal'c is difficult to write, so forgive me for any dialogue of his. So, without further ado, here is the new and improved "Don't Think, Bad For the Team!"
(Reviews will make me work harder and faster to get the next chapter up! Please feed me!)
Chapter One- "Are you thinking what I am thinking?"
Sam Carter turned the monitor so that the rest of her team could see it. What they saw was a lovely scene of a field of wildflowers, lush forest, and distant mountains in the background. It looked… well, like every other planet that they had ever visited. Still, at least it was pretty.
"So what do you think, Carter?" Jack O'Neill asked, staring at the screen.
"Well, Sir, I don't see anything that poses a threat. As far as atmosphere goes, it seems compatible with our needs. There are signs of possible Naquada in the initial samples that MALP took. I think it is worth checking out," She replied. Jack rolled his eyes, knowing this was going to be one of the boring missions that he hated so much, where his little scientists got to geek out while he and Teal'c sat around and babysat them. Still, they could use a quiet mission for a change.
"Fine. I'll talk it over with Hammond." He said, resignedly, and left her office before she and Daniel could start talking rocks and, well, more rocks.
The next day, after making sure that nothing had changed on the planet, General George Hammond gave his flagship team the go-ahead. As they were walking up the ramp, he heard the Colonel start singing "On the road again…" He grinned to himself, and waited a moment after the wormhole disengaged before heading for his office.
A little over an hour later, the alarms went off.
"Unscheduled activation!" was screeched across the base. That, plus the wailing of the sirens, was enough to wake the dead and the General rushed to the Control Room just in time to hear the Sergeant say it was SG-1's code.
"Open the iris." He commanded. A minute later, SG1 strolled through the gate and down the ramp.
"Welcome back, SG-1. How was your mission?" Hammond asked, pleased to see that they were all in one piece.
"Fine, General. No trees, no Goa'uld, no crazy aliens trying to kill us. Kind of boring, actually." Jack replied. "Carter got some dirt samples, but other than that there was nothing we saw worth sticking around for."
"Good. We'll debrief after you get cleared by Medical." Hammond said. The team nodded and left to change and see the Doctor. Once changed, they were all sitting in the infirmary, waiting for their post-mission shots.
"Tell me something, Doc. What, exactly, do those shots have in them? Super-Glue?" Jack grumbled as he pulled his pants back up. Janet just chuckled and turned to Daniel.
"Not always, Colonel. Sometimes I put just plain old water in there out of spite." She replied cheekily.
"What?" She heard Jack ask.
"I said, sometimes I just put water in there." Janet repeated.
"I know that. What did you say, Daniel? I couldn't hear you over Carter jabbering to herself." Jack called out loudly and pointedly. Janet paused in confusion. Neither Daniel nor Carter had spoken.
"I didn't say anything, Jack". Daniel said, giving Janet an equally confused look.
"Sure you did. I heard you, or tried to." Jack responded. *Good grief. And they say he is a genius.*
"Jack, honest! I didn't say anything. And thank you very much, but my IQ is considerably higher than yours." Daniel replied smartly.
"Daniel, you did too say something. And I did not say a thing about your intelligence, although I am beginning to wonder." *Geek *
"I am not a geek!"
"I didn't say you were!"
"Jack, you just…"
"Would you two stop it!" Janet cried. Something definitely wasn't right with the SGC's flagship team.
"I heard that, Carter!" Jack yelled. Turning, Janet ripped the curtain between them and Jack open, looking confused between the group.
"Colonel, Major Carter didn't say anything." She told him.
"Of course, she did. She said that she though both of us were geeks." He said defensively, and Daniel nodded in agreement.
"I did not!" they all heard Sam say.
"The Tauris are strange beings." They heard Teal'c say.
"We do not need your two cents right now, Teal'c." Jack snapped, frustrated.
"Sir, he didn't say anything." Janet defended, wondering if maybe they had lost their minds…or maybe she had lost hers from being around them too much. By this time, all four members were standing around Jack's bed. Jack looked at Carter, and his eyes stared at her intently, as if by doing so, he would learn the meaning of life. Suddenly, the light bulb went off.
"Carter, think of something." He ordered, his eyes narrowing in thought.
"Like what, Sir?" she asked, confused by his question.
"I don't know. Um…your favorite color." He said. Sam shrugged and closed her eyes. Jack listened closely, and then jumped as he heard her say "Dark blue," but her lips never moved. He decided to test his theory.
*Is that the color of your underwear right now, Major?" he thought, never verbally saying a word. Sam's eyes shot open and she glared at him.
"I believe that is a bit inappropriate, Sir." She said stiffly, and then blushed. *Thank God he doesn't know it is true!* she thought, belatedly. Jack looked at Daniel and Teal'c with a grin. The first was blushing, but wide-eyed with shock. The second man had his eyebrow in the air so high Jack thought it might fly right off his forehead.
"You heard that, too, didn't you?" Jack asked and the other men nodded.
"Now, Daniel, you think of something." Sam said, finally catching on to what the Colonel had figured out. Janet stood back and watched as suddenly Jack and Sam burst out in laughter. Daniel sat there and blushed and Teal'c's eyebrow just went even higher, although now with more amusement.
"What?!" She asked, completely lost.
"Where in the world did you find boxer shorts with pyramids on them?" Jack asked, finally controlling his laughter.
"You don't wanna know." Daniel replied sheepishly.
"Now, you Teal'c." San said, turning to the last member of the team. Teal'c nodded and closed his eyes.
*Kree * he though and the other 3 chuckled at the silent (at least verbally) thought.
"Would someone please tell me just what the hell is going on?" Janet cried.
"Well, it seems that we can hear each other's thoughts, Doc." Jack said, and then grabbed his ears. "Stop that! Both of you, now!" He yelled at Daniel and Sam. They had both suddenly gone off in tirades mentally and it was too much for Jack's precious ears to withstand.
"Sorry, Sir. Um…clear your mind, Daniel." Sam said and closed her eyes. Jack heard her quiet down, but Daniel was still going crazy.
* This is amazing! I have never heard of this before in any of the ancient mythologies! Maybe it is something Celtic or something else entirely that we haven't run into yet. Or maybe something that just didn't originate from here. Maybe something on the planet! No, we didn't see anyone or anything that would likely cause this…maybe a flower or… * he mentally rambled.
"Daniel, shut up!" Jack cried out, causing the archeologist to jump.
"Sorry." He said aloud, and then mentally quieted down.
"Okay…. So, you can hear each other's thoughts?" Janet asked and the four team mates nodded. "Well, I'm going to need to run some tests."
"Damn." Jack grunted as he raised his shirt sleeve.
A/N: Ok, so here is the first part of the story. Funny? Pathetic? If you want more, or even if you don't, then review me and maybe I will consider going on and continuing to fix it. It actually gets funnier down the road, but exposition is a necessity. Please review if you are interested in me continuing this (even if is it just an edited version).