Disclaimer: I don't own anything related to the show "Leverage", but if I did, I would be a very happy man.
A/N: Btw, there are various spoilers in this fic regarding a few episodes. Hopefully, you've watched a good handful of episodes to know what's going on. So, just know, you've been warned.
Parker's loose-leaf Notebook
Dear Loose-leaf Notebook,
My name? Alice White. No, wait. That's wrong. It's….Ms. Alice White.
Yeah.
No.
Okay.
It was Alice White during the trial thing. Riiight. Parker. The name's Parker!
And, oh, how I love my family! They all seem so…nice. They all seem so…crazy. Not crazy like my foster folks, but, crazy. Funny thing though. They all think I'm crazy. I like that. Now that that comes to mind, how are they crazy again? Wait, I remember!
Sophie's crazy because she's like thousands of people in one! A family all in one body. It's really funny though when she has people watching her. She gets all dramatic as if the world came to an end. Ooooh, what if the world did come to an end? Maybe she'll be three times as dramatic! Maybe. She tries to help me be social, so, I guess the drama helps one way or another.
And Nate. Nate lost his only son. He's crazy because the insurance company made him that way. It was wrong. No money for his kid's care? Well, it makes me smile to know we made that Poole guy pay. Oh, and I see Nate drinking a lot. And from what I've been told, drinking is bad. So, I kinda want to try it! But, I don't think it's too fun since Nate gets upset when he drinks. Sophie's the only one to calm him, when she isn't some Indian or French person. Which reminds me…
Eliot. He fights and cooks, therefore, he's crazy. I envy him. He can take on a mob or two and prepare a gourmet feast very well. I. I can steal very well. Not much comparison.
And, last but not in the least, least, Hardison. He knows too much. Too much about computers. Too much about devices. Just. Too. Much. But, he's a foster kid too, sooo, he's my honorary crazy friend! But, there's more to his craziness. He looks at me funny. Ever since I told him we were a family, he looks at me funny. When I mention his name, he looks at me funny. Especially, after we pretended to make out before stealing the David. Now, he really looks at me funny! I dunno. A little too crazy for me. What if, if, I was geek? He did say, "If you were a geek, you'd be so turned on right now", when we worked together on the plane's wiring. As if knowing how to electronically hack and disable a bomb on a plane that's about to crash is…"turn-on"able. But, yeah… He is interesting, and, pretty cool. Maybe, I am "turn-on"able? Eh, who knows.
All I know is. We all are crazy. Every last one of us. We steal money, my favorite hobby, from some bad guys and give it to the good guys. If that's not crazy, I don't know what is!
Love,
Alice White Parker