Here With Me, an inuyasha fanfic

Luvsdogz: Oi minna-san!! This is my first songfic (that I actually completed to post), but I don't ask you to be nice in reviewing because of the fact (I still ask that you review/flame/criticize!!!) ::grin::

Um... Warnings: Kagome introspective. Songfic. Non-AU. Angst/drama stuffs. Kind of InuKikyou but not really (I can say the same with it being "InuKago"). Jumbled together thoughts that I'm not really sure how they somehow tie together, if at all. Alternative ending. ((The fact that it's a Michelle Branch song...? O.o Okay, now I'm rambling.))

Disclaimer: I do not own neither Inuyasha or "Here with me" by Michelle Branch, nor do I profit by writing this (in a cash way, cause this is really good brain-power-profit-...-whatever stuff ::grin, nod, sweatdrop:: I think.).

::lalala:: - song lyrics. -:-:-:-:-:-:- Lalala - flashback -:-:-:-:-:-:- I shouldn't have to bother explaining what goes in the quotation marks.

If you skipped through the above, please go back and read it before continuing. Hehe, thanks, and enjoy!

Delicately, I reached out to touch the image. Cold was the glass as my reflections fingertips met my own. I smiled, though only slightly. A hollow thing, it was. It had been so long since I'd last seen myself, having gotten rid of any mirrors I had after I left you nearly two tears ago. After all, if I didn't rid myself of that face, I think I'd of gone insane.

Every time I saw myself, I saw that face again, her face, and I needed to get away from it. I don't know what I'd do if I didn't manage to hide my face, her face, from my sight.

Though, I had finally mustered up the courage to get a full length mirror, hidden on the back of my door. Given, I hadn't looked at it for the couple of weeks it had been there, but I eventually decided it was time to get over this roadblock in my life. So, here I am, seeing myself instead of her like I believed I would. I saw my unkempt bangs, not her neat ones, my tired, dead eyes (strange; I remembered them to be so upbeat and lively), not her cold ones. Strangely, they had been cold though still managed to resemble a burning fire. Mentally I listed everything that set her apart from me, and while they were all small, hardly noticeable, things, I realized that I was wrong every time you had yelled at me, telling me how alike we were.

Liar.

Too bad, though. I would love to go back and prove to you, prove how wrong you were. But it's a little late for that.

::It's been a long, long time since I looked into the mirror::
::I guess that I was blind::
::Now my reflection's getting clearer::
::Now that you're gone things will never be the same again::

It makes me a little sad, you know, to think that I can't ever see you again. And think about that I do, along with anything else. I'm always thinking about you, you plague my mind, and I'm defenseless to stop it.

Not like I want to stop it, to forget you, don't get me wrong. The time I spent you was the best time of my life.

If only I actually told you how I felt before I left instead of my lies.

Ever since the sixth member of their group ((1)) had joined them, it seemed the future girl was trying to distance herself from them, Inuyasha especially. She was always tense, as if preparing to hear horrible news soon. And all but two of them understood her in a sense, the other two either acted oblivious, ignored it, or were too caught up in each other to care. But, not any of them had expected to hear the words that escaped her lips, despite all the distance she had been putting in between them and herself lately. "I hate you Inuyasha!"

::There's not a minute that goes by every hour of every day::
::You're such a part of me::
::But I just pulled away::

::Well, I'm not the same girl::
::You used to know::
::I wish I said the words I never showed::

Hand stretched back out, checking if what I see is still real. It is. I sank to the floor.

Why did everything have to turn out as it had? I know that it was how you two believed it should be - repaying her as you promised. And I know, I know, that you had to go with her, you could never be with me. I know that better than anyone. But, some selfish part of my mind keeps pointing out to me that I should've tried harder to steal you away. I can't help but agree, I probably wouldn't have that deadened feeling all the time if I had managed to steal your heart from her.

I leaned against the mirror, the glass cooling off my forehead, if only slightly. Silently, I waited for the tears to come, as if they would bring you back. Gods, I wish they would.

::I know you had to go away::
::I died just a little, and I feel it now::
::You're the one I need::
::I believe that I would cry just a little::
::Just to have you back now::
::Here with me::
::Here with me::

You loved her so much more than me, its true. You were willing to choose death over life because of how much she meant to you.

"I hate you Inuyasha!" she screamed as loud as she could manage, with her throat threatening to close off as it was. The hanyou, holding the other in his arms, had once opened his mouth to say something, but closed it quickly. There was only silence, though the future girls heartbeat rang loudly in her ears. Mouth dry, tears threatening to spill, throat closed off, she decided it was time to run, too scared to speak, dare she admit something.

::You know that silence is loud when all you hear is your heart::
::And I wanted so badly just to be a part of something strong and true::
::But I was scared and left it all behind::

For some time I was hoping that you'd change your mind. Ha, surprise! Its all just a joke, I'm really in love with you, Kagome!

If only...

Still, I hope you're out there, even after all this time. Will you come back to me or is it truly too late? Please, if only I could at least see your face once more.

::And I'm asking::
::And I'm wanting you to come back to me::
::Please?::

She turned to run, took a few steps, and looked over her shoulder one last time. He gave her a sad glance and walked off with the other dark haired girl.

Finally, I understand what that one simple glance meant; you knew that I -supposedly- hated you, because you were leaving with her. In a sense, you were trying to tell me that you were glad I -once again, supposedly- didn't love you, and that I should go and find someone who would make me happy.

::I never will forget that look upon::
::Your face::
::How you turned away and left::
::Without a trace::
::But I understand that you did what you had to do::
::And I thank you::

Leaning against the door as I still was, I let my hand drop finally. There were few of them, but tears rolled down my cheeks.

Like I have said, I know... I know everything... I have known forever... And I understand.... But... what I wouldn't give to have you back.

Alternative ending below!

This was supposed to end here, though if you want more of a cute, bittersweet ending, then continue reading onward. (I was inspired to write a cuter, happier bit). Though, if you stop reading here, I still ask that you review/flame/criticize (c'mon! be picky!).

I had my eyes closed, though that didn't stop me from telling that there was more light in my room, as if the thick drapes I had put up were moved aside. There was no need to check to verify the point, though, so I didn't. Only when I felt a hand on my cheek, pushing a tear away did my eyes startle back open. The first thing that I noticed was silky white hair. Then, a red outfit, and finally, entrancing golden eyes. I opened my mouth to say something, but my throat had closed off, I couldn't say a word.

You smiled warmly; my heart melted. "Oi damnit, don't cry. You know I'm not good at comforting people," you joked softly.

I started to shake, willing my hand to reach out to you just as I had the mirror before, but I still couldn't move. My lip quivered, I know as much, as I was on the verge of tears again, though for different reasons than before.

You sat down next to me, tilting your head. "What, ya got nothing ta say?"

I smiled, and practically threw myself at you, arms around your neck. Its real, you're real, you're back! "You.... came to get me..."

"Feh," you muttered, putting on your 'tough guy' act again. "I would've been here sooner if somebody hadn't sealed off the damn well! Took Miroku two years to break through so I could drag your sorry ass back to us."

I smiled, resting my forehead on your shoulder. "I'll be coming back, Inuyasha, don't worry," I whispered as you, too, embraced me. "I'll stay for as long as you like."

There was nothing but a calm silence for a few minutes, before you finally found something else to say. "So.... you don't hate me, right?" you asked timidly, probably hoping I'd contradict my past words with this answer.

I smiled. "No, just the opposite."

"Oi, Kikyou, we need to talk," Inuyasha said, dragging the undead miko off by the arm. Kagome would be coming back soon, she had gone to the future to do one of her 'tests' as she had called them, and he wanted to get this over with before she returned. He guided his dark haired love off, making his hold more gentle, so his hand slipped down to hers. Once they had reached a small clearing in the forest, he stopped suddenly, and hugged her. There was a few minutes of silence before he decided to continue. "Kikyou, I... I'm sorry, but...." he trailed off, as he saw the future girl standing not too off, out of hearing range, but not far still. She was looking at them with distaste, seeming as if she had paused mid-step when she realized it was them.

"I hate you Inuyasha!" she screamed. Then there was silence. Inuyasha pulled away from Kikyou slightly, keeping a clawed hand on her shoulder. He turned to walk away with her, and heard the sound of Kagome's footsteps. He peeked over his shoulder to check if she was heading towards them or away. Away. He gave her a sad smile, thinking something along the lines of: 'Oh, joy. I fucked up again.' just before she ran.

He looked at Kikyou seriously after the echoing footsteps finally died out. "I can't go with you to hell," he stated firmly.

Kikyou turned away, staring upwards, hands twisted together behind her back. "I figured as much," she started knowingly. "You found someone who needs you alive, someone who needs you more than I.... and if I'm not mistaken - vise versa." There was a hollow smile on her face, her eyes blank, her tone monotonous. She turned to look at him. "Am I not right?"

He nodded, slightly ashamed of himself, ashamed for telling Kikyou that he could not fulfill his debt as he had promised.

Nothing would allow him to see how she was feeling about this, as she continued. "Then go to her, set things straight. When you return, I will be gone." He was about to protest, but Kikyou would put up a better argument in the end, he knew. So, with only one choice, he ran after Kagome. Once she could no longer see any trace of the hanyou, Kikyou allowed a longing smile to grace her lips, as she whispered: "You're lucky, Kagome... Take good care of him, he is precious to not only you."

((1)) - Inuyasha, Kagome, Miroku, Sango, and Shippo form the little group of five. I do not count Kirara, and the sixth member you should be able to figure out after reading through the story.

Whee! Complete in two days (not the full 48 hours, of course!)!! Um.... flame/review/criticize/whatever! Just let me know you know I exist! ::grins, giving a thumbs up::