Stan was lying on his bed, all the lights in his room turned off, leaving the black haired boy in dark isolation. From his computer speakers, the Plain White T's blasted, filling the room with a depressing hard rock symphony.
"All I wanted was your love, love, love, love, love, loooove…"
Nothing was more appropriate than listening to the most depressing songs iTunes had to offer, especially ones that were completely relatable.
Stan stared up at the ceiling, watching the fan in his room slowly spin around, listening to the music, which drowned out the pitter-patter of the oh too cliché rain that fell outside. He'd felt this way before—the last time this happened—but that didn't mean that he didn't feel like a knife was being twisted in his chest. If anything, this time was even worse than the first.
His thoughts were still wrapped around her, remembering all the time he'd spent with the girl with flowing hair of ebony and who had dazzling hazel eyes. That girl he'd loved for years—the one he'd lost so many lunches over he was that lovesick, and the one he'd cared most for—was gone. It wasn't even because he wanted her to go, it was because she left.
"Stan…" Wendy muttered, lowering her eyes, a few tears streaming down her cheeks, "I-it's not like I wanted it to end this way…" She spoke softly, her mature voice quivering as she tried to think of the best way to say it.
"End what way, Wendy?" Stan asked, blue eyes glaring at the black haired girl, already being violently torn by her words, "End with you leaving me for another guy and not telling me until NOW?"
"Stan, it's not what you think!" She said, holding up two yellow gloved hands to try and calm the boy down, only ending up looking like a criminal guiltily putting her hands up, "I swear I just thought it was s-sexual tension…I NEVER MEANT FOR IT TO TURN INTO—"
"Shut the fuck up already!" He barked, "I shouldn't have even bothered to get back together with you after last time!"
Wendy froze, letting out a small gasp. Those words…did he really mean them? After all, it wasn't like they'd only just gotten back together; they'd been dating for years. And yet he was saying that he wished all that time between their first break up and then AWAY? He wanted to forget it all? Wish it never happened?
More tears spilt from the girl's eyes, plopping on the snow, the water drops sinking and fusing to the white blanket that coated the earth. It was all a mistake she regretted making from the start. The feelings she ended up developing in the end…she hated them. How could they betray her like that? Even though she was mature for her age, she was still a hormonal teenage girl; though did that make her actions any better? She knew that it was a poor excuse, but hearing Stan suggest that their relationship that had gone strong for so long was a WASTE… That was when it crossed the line.
"Do you really think that, Stan?" Wendy asked, snapping her head up to glower into the boy's eyes, trying to suppress the pain that was evident on her face, "You know, you NEEDED me! Don't think Kyle didn't tell me what exactly you went through last time we broke up."
Stan shuddered, the memories of his time as a Goth kid rearing their ugly heads. He did it then because he didn't have Wendy; he didn't want to go back to that. However, the way she worded her sentence…
"'Last time we broke up', huh?" Stan cocked a brow, "So you're saying we're through, now?"
Wendy opened her mouth to protest, only for her eyes to widen when she realised that she actually DID say that, and without even noticing. "I…Stan…I-I just…" She stammered, everything crumbling on her, coming down too fast, unable to formulate a way to get out of it.
"You just got over me, that's it," He answered for her, a cold glaze coming to his eyes, dulling the expression on his face to one of pure indifference, "Well you know what, I hope he treats you like the bitch you are," A part of him winced saying that, still having feelings for the girl that he couldn't deny, "Go fuck yourself, Wendy." With that, Stan turned away from his girlfriend—EX girlfriend—and started walking away, leaving Wendy to stand and watch as he walked towards his neighbourhood, where dark clouds loomed over the houses as omens of an impending storm.
Wendy was silent a long moment, Stan getting a good distance away from her before she dared speak again. Hurt couldn't even cover the feelings swirling inside the confused Wendy Testaburger.
All she ever really wanted was Stan…She never wanted anything else. But, in those moments, all those 'I love you's she remembered hearing, all those kisses the two shared, all the nights they'd spent with one another, they were all taunting her. So all that time really was a waste, wasn't it? She would've been better off sticking with Token or even just being a single lady? Going back to Stan was a mistake. She was living a mistake as if it was a good choice and was only just realising how stupid she was.
"FINE!" Wendy yelled to Stan, watching as the boy in the red poof-ball hat walked farther and farther away, "YOU THINK YOU'RE BETTER OFF WITHOUT ME? WELL I'M THE ONE WHO'S BETTER OFF WITHOUT YOU STAN!" The lies that left her mouth only encouraged more tears to leave her eyes, "I HATE YOU, YOU STUPID DICK, AND I HOPE YOU GET AIDS FROM THE NEXT STUPID WHORE YOU'LL CALL A GIRLFRIEND! GET BENT!"
Stan acted as though the girl's words just bounced off his back, though they were in truth battering him like a sledgehammer. He bit his lip, trying to keep himself together until he got home. He kept reminding himself that she broke up with him, though he still felt like he was the one who broke up with her. Either way, he just kept walking.
Wendy sniffled; wiping the tears from her eyes with her purple sleeves, wishing that, of all times, she could be the overly mature person she was. She was former student body president Wendy Testaburger for Christ's sake! She wasn't going to sob her eyes out over a boy, was she? Of course she was.
"FUCK YOU, STAN!" Wendy added, flipping him off despite the fact that he wasn't looking, "FUCK YOU RIGHT IN THE GODDAMN EAR!" With that, she turned the other way, running in the opposite direction, talking an alternate route to her house, wanting more seclusion as she sobbed over how horribly things went.
Stan could hear Wendy's sobs, the sounds piercing his heart. He wanted so badly to comfort her, feel the girl in his arms again, hold her tightly and tell her things would be okay, and then kiss away the tears as she slowly calmed down. But, at this point, that was all impossible. What was done was done; Stan and Wendy were through. And neither of them wanted it to happen.
The memories of what happened only an hour or so ago were imbedded into his mind, the scene replaying over and over, noticing each time how continually stupid he was for letting that happen.
She was done with you, man… A voice in his head told him, Wendy's gone and there's nothing you can do about it…
Stan groaned, rolling over in his bed, giving the stormy weather outside his window an icy glower. I hate her… He thought, I hate her I hate her I HATE HER!
"Hate is a strong word! But I really really really don't like you!" The song went on, trying to convince Stan that he was over the girl he was still yearning to have again, "Now that it's over, I don't even know what I liked about you! Brought you around! And you just brought me doooooown!"
The sky outside flashed white a moment, followed by a roar of thunder, the beat of the rain getting louder and louder as the storm raged on. Stan could only watch the weather and think of how damn convenient it was that the forecast turned to shit when the worst thing that ever happened to him happened.
"Hate is a strong word! But I really, really, really don't like yoooou!" A chorus of "O-oh, o-oh, o-oh"s drifted in the air, the guitar somehow playing as though it were strumming the boy's heartstrings, the periodic "I really don't like you…" sung by the lead vocals trying to persuade Stan that he really didn't like Wendy, and it was all her fault.
As the voices of the band faded, the guitar kept playing, competing with the random thunder that grumbled in the storm. The instrument repeated the same chords, although they somehow made the boy's chest ache. Hate was a strong word, but it wasn't that he didn't really, really, really like Wendy; it was because he loved her.
Maybe…I didn't let her explain…. Or…Ah FUCK… Stan shut his eyes, listening as the guitar faded out, the music that was helping him through the hard time abandoning him, leaving him all alone to sulk in the storm.
Alone… That was something he'd need to get used to all over again. Though he was already getting used to the cold empty feeling, it coming back to him like an old friend he'd never missed and hoped he'd never need to see again.
"Fuck it all…" Stan muttered, blinking rapidly, despising the dampness that had come to his eyes, "FUCK IT ALL!"
The thunder grumbled again, although it sounded more like laughter to the boy. Even Mother Nature knew he'd single handedly made himself a lonely little dickwad. And, until he either got Wendy back or got over her, he knew that this feeling would remain, bitter loneliness stinging him like lightning.
And all he could think about as he drifted to sleep was how large the void in his heart once taken up by Wendy was and just how awful it was for it to have been replaced by loneliness.
A/N: Ugugugah this is so fucking depressing ;;A;; but it was the first drabble that wasn't K2 (as awesome as it is and as much as I just fucking love it) that I actually got around to finishing. It's all cause I whipped out my sister's Mac and just typed and typed to Plain White T's (I was actually expecting to write a far more comedic story that had nothing to do with Stan or Wendy...) and then...this. So I'm sorry if I made any of you Stendy fans cry, I'm not too happy about it either since I've actually grown quite fond of the two of them together. Anyway, if you must know and didn't get the slight subtle hints, it was implied that she cheated on him with Cartman (which is likely why it's so horrible trolol/shot). Why? Because it's cute (NOT IN THIS CASE THOUGH). Anyway, I may develop something off this...I dunno. It's unlikely but plausible. However, I won't be doing anything right now except getting some sleep since it's 5:30 in the morning and I'm already still a little drained from updating Kenderella earlier. WOOO I'M HAVING A PRODUCTIVE WRITING WEEKEND. Anyway, sorry for the tears, R&R, blah blah blah ~CQO