Summary: After a conversation with her soon to be sister-in-law, Bella Swan needs to seriously think about where her life is going. Her love for Edward is stronger than anything. Nothing can change that. But can the need to be human wreck more than the two lives? Once a choice is made, you can't really turn back, but they have forever to change things. HEARTBREAK follows the paths of these children. When they come to a fork in the road, which coice will they choose? And when they realize they've made a wrong turn, will the road circle back to the start and give them another chance?

Also, ITS NOT WHAT YOU THINK! Okay, all you die-hard Edward fans out there, (I would totally murder me if I were you. Or if someone else was doing this story. I would flame flame flame and then encourage the author to use said flames to roast Jacob Black alive.) I LOVE EDWARD. Remember that throughtout the story, and you won't freak out too much. Just because the next few chapters cause you physical pain and burn your eyes, DON'T STOP READING PLEASE. You can't have a rainbow without the rain. Once I'm done with the next couple of chapters, the tables will turn and you will be screaming for joy while the others cry THEIR eyes out. PLEASE. again, I LOVE EDWARD. I HATED JAKE. (ed I know, but I just feel sorry for him now and think he's hot. But he's got nothing on Edward. Seriously. DEATH TO JACOB! (i shall not be killing him tho, and I hope Steph doesn't either) GO IMPRINT WITH LEAH!)

No murdering the author! I recently decided that I wanted to do this (actually I've been fighting it for a while...) but I HATE Jacob (or I used to) and I am totally team Edward. You'll see how this turns out. I rather like the idea actually. I'm not sure how long it's going to be but I already know how its going to end. So you shall not convince me to drag it out! I don't think my choices in characters will get in the way of the story here because I tend to make Jake a little too nice when I write about him, instead of being a jerk like he usually is. (In the words of Bella Swan 'when the werewolf is being nice, its the best') So, I no longer hate him. My friends will hate me for doing this. And by writting this, I expect my very first 'flame'. Come on people! Do it! I dare you. Flame me! JK. I'm not sure if I have ever gotten a 'flame' before because I don't let it bother me. I have gotten little complaints but no real 'you're writting sucks, you need to stop.' Or something like that. Not even for Seeing Double which DID suck. But I'm expecting some 'how on earth could you do this, you're an insult to Twilight fans everywhere, how can you call yourself Team Edward? Traitor.' But to all of these, just wait and see how it turns out... I will have so much fun with this one, and sorry if that seems a little cruel. Please don't hate me! I still love Edward with most of my heart. (there are small little protions owned by Alexander Sterling, Jace Wayland, Stefan Salvatore, Micheal Glass, Lorchan Furey, Erik Night... and then there are TEENY TINY CRUSHES on Jared, Ian, Emmett, Jasper, Jacob, Quil, and Carlisle... Oh, and a little crush on James Marsden (sp) AND a less than little but not totally huge crush on Gerard Way he likes books! And he's hot and funny! And I sound like a slut for liking so many people. I just fall in love with unatainable people a lot. Oh, and something Jill will never know... I observed cuteness of another non-dateable person except that this person is undateable in ways that my friends would MURDER me if they found out about my observation. But since Jill has already read this chapter, Steph won't read it, I don't think Ana will, and IDK if any of my other friends will decide to fanfiction, so I'm all good. hehe)

So anyways

still w4bd&le (waiting for breaking dawn and loving edward. sign it and spread Twilightness)

Kasey aka edwardcullenissosexy

oh yeah, and Taylor Swift loves Twilight and you so stay beautiful.

Oh, and this takes place in Eclipse, after Rosalie's conversation with Bella.

I tossed and turned on the balck couch in Edward's room. I was being held captive! And not only that, but I now I had Rosalie's words swirling in my head, keeping me from sleep. You will remember though. It's a lot to give up. Yes, but I would get everything I had ever wanted from the moment I knew I was in love with Edward. Wouldn't I?

What if when my mind had grown up more that I realized I had made a huge mistake? That if I had really thought about it, I wouldn't have changed. I would have stayed human.

What if it wastoo much to give up. My mind flashed to my almost human best friend. I had been pondering over why it hurt so much to think about leaving him behing when I entered the immortal world.

I eventually fell asleep. And when I did, it was a nightmare, not just caused by Edward's absence.

I dreamed of Rosalie's sitution. But also my own. I was sitting on my front porch. I had my little girl in my lap while my son and Edward played tag in the yard. His dark hair glinted in the sunlight as he chased after his father. His father wasn't sparkling.

The little girl sitting next to me looked up with beautiful brown eyes.

"Can I play too, mommy?"

"Of course you can, sweetie." I replied. She jumped off the swing and ran to join the game. Edward flashed me a dazzling grin and he scooped up our daughter, setting her on his shoulders. Their hair color blended, though hers was lighter than his, and you could no longer tell the difference between whose hair was whose.

"Gotcha! You're it." He put her down again and ran a few steps forward. She chased after him then abruptly turned around, trying to grab at her brother. His green eyes sparkled as he ran away from her. She sped up and her hand brushed his arm.

"Tag. You're it." He kicked his foot, showing off his temper that he had inherited from both parents.

He then chased after his dad. Edward's hair glimmered in the sunlight. But he didn't. The diamond faucets that were usually set in his skin, glittering in sunlight, throwing rainbows in every direction, weren't there. Edward was human.

But that wasn't possible,

The vision changed abrubtly. My children's pale skin tone darkened and my daughter's hair shifted from bronze to brown, my son's eyes changed to black. The man standing next to him, grew and turned into Jacob Black.

Just in case you missed it earlier... Also, ITS NOT WHAT YOU THINK! Okay, all you die-hard Edward fans out there, (I would totally murder me if I were you. Or if someone else was doing this story. I would flame flame flame and then encourage the author to use said flames to roast Jacob Black alive.) I LOVE EDWARD. Remember that throughtout the story, and you won't freak out too much. Just because the next few chapters cause you physical pain and burn your eyes, DON'T STOP READING PLEASE. You can't have a rainbow without the rain. Once I'm done with the next couple of chapters, the tables will turn and you will be screaming for joy while the others cry THEIR eyes out. PLEASE. again, I LOVE EDWARD. I HATED JAKE. (ed I know, but I just feel sorry for him now and think he's hot. But he's got nothing on Edward. Seriously. DEATH TO JACOB! (i shall not be killing him tho, and I hope Steph doesn't either) GO IMPRINT WITH LEAH!)

The next morning, I was still mad at Alice. And, I was still thinking about my dreams. I could still see the angel watching me resentfully while I crawled, dying, down the street. Her resent was because I was dying, and she couldn't. She had been right where I was now, about to greet death, and then it was all snatched away from her. She could never be human again, and she would never be human.

There were so many things, according to her, that I could do and she couldn't. Would I want kids sometime down the road, if it meant I had to live without Edward? I stalked off towards English, ignoring Mike when he tried to talk to me, ignoring Alice's glare.

The vision of my kids running around, chasing a human Edward was still there too. But Edward couldn't be human. I was the only one of us who could be, and I wanted to give that humanity away. Maybe Rosalie was right. You couldn't be rash about permanent things. And if I stayed human, I wouldn't have to leave Charlie and Renee. I could stay friends with Jacob. I could have children. Grow old.

But what would those things be worth with out Edward?

Did they rank higher than I had originally thought on the list of things I wanted in my life? I had never actually thought about this, and maybe I should have before I signed my humanity away and traded it in for super strength and beauty, a world of staying out of the sun.

What if I was destined to be in the sun? I had grown up with it, always loved it. Had always hated the clouds and the rain. And now I dreaded sunny days and thanked the heavens above when it was pouring down rain and Edward greeted me with glistening wet hair.

But maybe I needed the sun more than I thought. After all, I became more human when I was with Jacob, considered him to be my own personal sun. If I became a vampire, I would not only be giving up my own personal sun, but the real sun too. Could I handle that, or would I go insane?

What if I became a ticking time bomb, destined to hurt everyone around me when I suddenly snapped. And by the time I snapped, it would be too late to change anything. I would be stuck in darkness forever.

But would it truly be dark if Edward was there?

My mind was over loaded and I could no longer think. Did I want to be human, or not?

We changed classes and I found that instead of going to class, I jumped on the back of a motorcycle with my best friend. And we sped down to La Push.

We wound up on the beach, conversing about anything and everything. The conversation turned to when I would be changing. I blurted out "graduation" with a smile before I could think about my answer. I guess that answered my other question as well. If I was so eager to change, I couldn't want to be human that bad. And, the Cullens were almost human. They had feelings and acted human. The human in them had reawoken from the vampire induced slumber when they had stopped feeding on humans. Or it had never gone to sleep. My own vampire was like this. He basically was human. With the benefits of a vampire. The best of both worlds. Except that he couldn't grow old with me. Couldn't give me children. I wondered how much this pained him when he thought of it.

I saw Jacob's form quivering and knew that he hadn't expected it to be so soon.

"Jake, I'm sorry. I shouldn't have blurted it out like that. I didn't mean..." I trailed off, not knowing what to say at his expression.

"Bells, I won't lose you that fast, with out you knowing." And then he crashed his lips to mine, pulling me closer to him. I was overwhelmed with the heat. I tried to push away from him but it was no use. I was no match for his strength. Oh what I would give to have the muscles of a vampire!

I was surprised by my realization at how much I wanted to be a vampire at this moment. I stopped struggling for a second and he grasped me tighter, misunderstanding. I was caught off guard and found myself pressing closer to his heat, trying to get away from the cold spray of the ocean, moving closer to the warmth that was Jacob Black. And instead of longing to be a vampire, I felt more human than I had in months. And my dream came back to me. Not the part with Edward, but the part where Jacob was my husband and the father of my children. And I knew that I wanted to be human more than I had first believed. And Jacob could give me humanity.

I'm not sure if that made any sense at all. Please review. I don't care what you say, I will continue this story, but I want to hear what your opinion is. It will be painful to write this for me because I love Edward so much. It will change. I feel so evil. I have the power to break three hearts, but I will only mend two. I think this will be pretty short, and I'm not quite sure what the point of this is, except that the idea is there. I am sorry this will be so cruel, and the point of this is not to irreparably break hearts. I will not be doing that I hope. Ahh. I can't write anymore.