Disclaimer: All things STAR WARS belong to George Lucas and his franchise.
This story is strictly for fun. No profit is being made off of it, it's
simply here for your enjoyment!
***Minor Spoilers from Dark Journey and Rebel Dream. This takes place within the first seven days that our young pilots arrive on Borleias.
CHAPTER ONE
Colonel Jagged Fel was not accustomed to uncertainty. He stood outside the office of his uncle, Wedge Antilles, his fist hovering in mid- knock. The New Republic had reclaimed Borleias a little more than a standard month ago, and Jag himself had arrived only hours ago with two rag- tag squadrons that had accompanied him from Hapes. He intended to aide the New Republic in any way he could, however it was that intention that plagued him now in the late evening hours.
He was about to ask a favour of a man he barely knew. During his tenure as a liaison between the New Republic and the Imperial Remnant, he spent most of his time away from both sides, and the time he wished he'd had to get to know his uncle was never available to him. He had a feeling that Wedge would give in to his favour; he had heard that his uncle was a fair man, a man who possessed more military savvy than many political figures cared to admit. Yet, something nagged at him to forego this idea of his. Something gnawed at his courage, preventing his fist from making impact with the door. Jag frowned as his hand fell back to his side.
He knew exactly why he hesitated and it had nothing to do with Wedge. If my father knew that I was here, knew what I was about to do, he'd kill me. Jag sighed. The last conversation he had with his father instantly came to his mind, and General Baron Soontir Fel's words still had the power to scold, long after they had been spoken. I expected better of you--a not uncommon dynamic between fathers and their sons. Facing the wrath of his father, disappointing him yet again, was a fate worse than death, Jag had decided long ago. His father wasn't always a hard man to deal with. Out of uniform, Soontir Fel was a kind, compassionate man, but once in uniform, his military training brought about a different facade, one Jag both feared and respected.
His actions here, however, would be considered rash. Rebellious, perhaps, and that would only damage his relationship with his father a little further. However, if I don't go ahead with this, I'm going to continue throughout this war with the Yuuzhan Vong feeling as if I haven't done my share in aiding the galaxy in some way. Father will be disappointed, but he will understand my reasoning.
He straightened and knocked on the door. It was only a matter of seconds before the door rolled back, and Wedge Antilles stood there, smiling through his weariness. Behind him, Jag noticed Luke Skywalker standing next to a corner desk. The Jedi Master looked over and smiled.
"Jag!" Wedge stepped away from the door, making room for Jag to enter. "It's good to see you! C'mon in!"
Jag bowed respectfully to his uncle, not moving into the office. "I apologize for stopping by so late. I didn't mean to interrupt--"
Wedge waved away the comment, the smile still on his face. "Nonsense! Luke and I were just talking." He clasped Jag on the shoulder, ushering him into the office. "Besides, I always have time for family."
Luke nodded to Wedge and Jag. "I'll leave the two of you to talk."
Jag executed the same bow to Luke. "Please don't leave on my account, Master Skywalker. I'm not here on personal business."
"Oh." Luke looked mildly surprised as he turned to Wedge. They glanced at each other, exchanging conspiratorial smiles. The Jedi Master took a seat in front of Wedge's desk.
Wedge closed the door and gestured to a seat next to Luke. "Have a seat, Jag, and tell us what's on your mind." His uncle circled his desk and seated himself, taking up a glass of amber liquid.
Unsure what the look between his uncle and Luke meant, Jag shrugged it off and took the proffered seat, maintaining his formality. "I overheard some of your E-Wing pilots discussing a reconnaissance mission to the Kesna Sector."
Wedge turned an annoyed face to Luke, rolling his eyes. "Remind me at our next meeting, Luke, to reiterate the definition of the word 'classified'." Jag noticed a slight grin on the Jedi Master's face as Wedge looked back to him and sighed. "Kesna is on the fringes of the Sesswenna Sector, closer to Averam than to Coruscant. It's mostly made up of uninhabitable worlds. The last recon we had there was six months ago, and there were no signs of Yuuzhan Vong activity." Wedge finished his drink, setting the empty glass down in front of him, his fingers still wrapped around it. "With the enemy on Coruscant, the Vong could use Kesna against us, waging a war on two fronts should they decide to throw a full military assault on Borleias. However, if they are not there, Kesna could be used later on as a staging area for our troops when we take back Coruscant."
The confidence in his uncle's voice was refreshing. Jag had heard too many talking about surrender and failure lately that the determination in Wedge's voice sparked his own further. "I thought that E-Wings were not equipped for long-range recon operations?"
"They're not." Wedge snorted. "E-Wings have the speed and the firepower required for medium assault and close support for convoys or to reinforce planetary defences, such as here at Borleias. Because I'm lacking in supplies, I don't have any unmanned probes to send to Kesna, so, I'm sending five of my fastest ships. A modified Corellian Corvette will accompany them as a command ship, and each E-Wing will be hitting a different system . It will take them about seven days, and the information they'll gather won't be nearly enough, but it will help aide us in piecing together what's going on in Kesna, if anything. I'd prefer to keep them here, but this information could be critical down the line. "
"I see."
"You have a suggestion, Colonel?"
Jag blinked, not realizing he had been lost in his thoughts, and turned toward Luke. The Jedi Master was studying him pensively, and Jag had the sudden feeling that his thoughts were no longer his own. He regained his composure, and nodded. "Yes, I do." While he spoke, he kept his attention divided between the two veterans. "Your E-Wings and the Chiss Clawcraft have a number of similarities. Both ships are exceptionally manoeuvrable, fast, and have superior firepower. Clawcraft can be used in the same capacity as your E-Wings; either for modular support or planetary defence. However, I can take it one step further." Wedge raised an eyebrow, and Jag knew he had his unsolicited attention. "Over the past five years, one-third of our starfighters have been upgraded with advanced long-range sensors and in-flight mapping abilities. As you both know, the Chiss have been mapping the Unknown Regions for decades. I, myself, have taken part in a number of recent expeditions. I know what to look for, what kind of information you need. With the Vong setting up shop on Pyria VI, you're going to need as many fighters as you can get stationed here, and your E-Wings are suited for that purpose." He paused briefly, taking a deep breath. "Provide me with a map of Kesna and strategic points of interest marked on it, and I'll get the information you need in three days."
Wedge nodded slowly. "A very interesting suggestion, Jag, but I don't see how sending twelve ships instead of five is going to be more effective. You said yourself that I need as many fighters here to aide in our defence."
"I didn't say anything about sending twelve ships, sir." Before Wedge or Luke could interject, Jag went on. "Only two Clawcraft arrived from Hapes, as I'm sure you're aware. My second-in-command, Shawnkyr Nuruodo, is taking over the squadrons while I assist with your Twin Suns Squadron, and she will remain here. I'd go alone."
He didn't think his uncle's eyes could pop so far out of his head, but Wedge surprised him. That initial shock was immediately erased with an expression that Jag couldn't decipher. However, Luke was the first to speak.
"Our last recon to Kesna was six months ago. If the Vong are there, you run a very high risk of being detected, no matter where you jump in. If that happens, you could be captured or killed, and if you are captured, you'll be tortured and turned into one of their slaves."
The intensity on the Jedi Master's face was chilling and for a brief moment Jag wondered if Luke had experienced one of those Jedi visions he had heard about. No, he's simply voicing a concern, one that I've thought about a lot while walking to this office. He returned Luke's stare, hoping he portrayed the same intensity. "That won't happen. I'd kill myself before the Vong got me."
Wedge started to say something, but Jag interrupted before his uncle could get the words out. "There is an advantage to sending me alone, sir. The Vong have only encountered the Chiss on a handful of occasions, mostly during missions where we've assisted the New Republic. They know who we are, but for whatever reason they have yet to attack the Unknown Regions. Either we don't matter to them or they have something lined up for us later on. They know that we have aided you from time-to-time, yet they are smart enough to realize that we are not aligned with you."
Wedge continued to stare at him with that unreadable look. It made Jag slightly uncomfortable. "Go on." His voice revealed no emotion.
"If I go to Kesna on my own and there is a Vong fleet there, they will most likely consider me as a long-range scout for the Chiss, checking things out since they've taken Coruscant. There would be nothing in my ship's logs or my arrival that would indicate that I'm affiliated with your resistance group here, should my ship be captured. I'll plant false information to make them think I was nothing more than a long-range scout for the Chiss. I don't think they'll concern themselves too much with one fighter." He glanced at Luke, then back to his uncle. "You need all the support you can get to help defend Borleias. Why risk five ships and their support on a recon mission when you can risk only one? Your loss won't be as great if one ship goes down instead of five. I'm more expendable--"
"No!" Wedge pushed himself up from his desk in one fluent motion, his action so swift the chair he was sitting in fell to the floor. "Don't ever say that again, Jagged! No one is more expendable than anyone else here. Not you, not me! I'm surprised to hear such talk coming from the son of Soontir Fel!"
There was no mistaking the anger in Wedge's voice and it had the power to silence and reprimand at the same time. Jag stared wide-eyed up at his uncle. The expression on his face had an eerie resemblance to his father's. Wedge's eyes narrowed at they seemed to bore right through to his soul, and his lips pursed into a tight, angry frown.
The silence blanketing the room was deafening. Jag could feel Luke's stare flitting between himself and Wedge. He rose from his seat, placing his hands palm-down on the desk. Whenever he'd had discussions like this with his father, it usually resulted in Jag becoming too impassioned and Soontir showing disapproval towards his son's pleas. He hoped things would be different with Wedge. He hoped his uncle would listen, instead of lecture him.
He took a deep breath, locking stares with Wedge. " To the Chiss, knowledge is power. The more you know about your enemy, the better your chances of destroying them piece-by-piece before the eventual explosion. I don't need to remind either of you of Grand Admiral Thrawn." He paused briefly then continued. "The Chiss parliament and my father are not willing to make any commitments to the ongoing war because they don't know enough about the Vong yet to gauge how they will react. They are being cautious, and I have no problem with that. Caution is good. However, that is not what I want.
"I have been a liaison between the New Republic, the Imperial Remnant, and the Chiss for a while now. I have engaged the Vong in only a handful of skirmishes. I have spent most of my time either performing recon missions or sitting in the Unknown Regions waiting for my next command--"
"And that's a bad thing?" Wedge folded his arms across his chest, his expression softening, but only slightly.
Jag sighed, lowering his head. He studied his hands and wondered how he could make his uncle see how much this recon mission to Kesna meant to him. He sighed again, bringing his gaze back to Wedge. This time he did not hide his feelings behind a mask of severity. If he was going to get his point across, he would have to appeal to his uncle's rebellious heart.
"I feel as if I'm standing behind a transparisteel window. The Unknown Regions are behind me and the rest of the galaxy is in front. I'm watching everything fall down around me. The universe is changing; the Yuuzhan Vong are unleashing a plague that is destroying worlds, sentient beings, and here I am, safe behind my window. I have this sense of security because I'm behind the transparisteel, but that is nothing but a false belief. Soon, that window is going to develop a crack and then the Unknown Regions will be subjected to the same cruelty and debauchery as the rest of the galaxy. None of us are safe.
"I feel as if I'm not contributing enough to the cause. Yes, I am joining your Twin Suns Squadron and yes, I have engaged the enemy on a number of occasions, but that's not enough for me. I need to do more. I have to do more. This is what I was trained for and I feel as if I'm being held back for some unknown reason." He leaned over the desk, still holding Wedge's stare. He was barely aware of movement to his right. Luke had risen from his seat and retreated to a corner of the room, granting them some privacy. "Please, uncle. Please. Let me do more. Let me do this one recon mission for you. I can get you the data you need. I may not be able to hit five systems at once, but I know what to look for, what you need. Three days is all I ask for."
Wedge blew out a long breath, glancing away to look at some invisible point on the wall. He looked weary and saddened, his eyes losing some of their sparkle. He slumped visibly, turning his stare back to him. For a moment, Jag felt surprise wash over him. The anguish displayed plainly on the other man's face was something he had not expected.
When Wedge spoke, his voice was quiet. "As a parent, we do everything in our power to protect our children from danger. It's easy when they're smaller because their fears are simple and easily disposed of. As they get older, they develop their own thought process, their own state of mind and it's harder for us to protect our children because they are able to make logical decisions on their own and defend themselves from danger. Still, it doesn't stop us from worrying about them, wanting to protect and to keep that danger away from them, like when they were small."
He leaned forward and placed his hands on the desk, mimicking Jag's stance. The young pilot's heart sank as he truly listened to his uncle's words. He's not going to send me because I'm family. He struggled to keep his gaze focused on Wedge, but failed. He dropped his head, fixing his stare on his hands once again, waiting for the acknowledgement from Wedge that he would not be going to Kesna. Another failure to add to the unimpressive streak of disappointments that seemed to follow him lately.
"Those feelings extend to you as well, Jag. Your arrival here adds a different level of concern. You're a damn good pilot and having you here to assist is something I am truly grateful for. However, no one can predict the outcome of our defence of Borleias. If something were to happen to you, not only do I lose a pilot, I lose a member of my family. I'm not a stupid man. I know that is a consequence of war, but that doesn't mean that I want a moment to come where I have to contact your family and tell your mother--my sister--that her third child is dead."
Wedge sighed. There was another awkward silence and Jag suddenly wished that he had never come to Borleias. He'd prefer to stay in the Unknown Regions then stand here and listen to his uncle tell him he wasn't going on a recon mission simply because they were family. He stood up, drawing his hands away from the desk and allowed them to fall to his sides. He raised his head, focusing his stare beyond Wedge. He couldn't bring himself to look at his uncle. He didn't need to see his father's expression staring back at him.
"If you truly feel that you need to do this, however, I will support you in any way I can."
Jag's eyes flicked to Wedge. His uncle was studying him, his hands behind his back. His expression was still sombre, however there was no disappointment in his eyes. Jag couldn't have been more surprised by those words; he believed that Wedge wasn't going to allow him to go on this mission. "Excuse me?"
A small grin tugged at the corner of Wedge's lips. "I can understand your feelings of inadequacy; knowing that you could do more but being restrained by a government that is unwilling to support you one hundred percent. I've been in that position myself, more times that I care to remember." He looked over to where Luke stood, then back to Jag. "I'm not thrilled about letting you do this, especially since we have no idea if the Vong are at Kesna. However, you have mentioned that you've been on assignments like this before, and I trust that you'll know when to get your ass out of there should trouble lay in wait."
Wedge walked around the desk and stood next to Jag. He turned to face his uncle, the shock slowly leaving him. "You have three days, Jag. If you're not back in three days or if I have had no contact with you since then, I'll have to assume the worst. I can't afford to send people after you."
Jag nodded, falling crisply back into formality. "I understand."
He began to bow respectfully to Wedge, but that was immediately halted when his uncle pulled him into an embrace. He stiffened, not use to such displays of emotion, then hesitantly hugged Wedge back.
"Come back safe, Jag." Wedge said, stepping away from him. "Don't give me that reason to contact your parents." He extended his hand to him.
Jag shook the proffered hand. "I won't."
"Good. You'll leave in the morning. Come see me one hour before your departure. I'll have a detailed map of Kesna ready for you." He turned away from him, walking back around to his desk. "Now, you should leave before I change my mind."
He bowed to his uncle, even though Wedge still had his back to him. Jag turned and repeated the gesture to the Jedi Master. Luke grinned, executing a salute. Jag walked out of the office and when the door closed behind him, he leaned heavily against the wall. He had gone into the meeting unsure of Wedge would say, experienced a moment where he thought his suggestion had been shot down without any further thought, then was surprised by Wedge's decision to allow him to Kesna. His heart beat hard in his chest, and Jag felt as if had just finished running laps around the base's perimeter.
Growing up, he had always thought of his father as his only true hero. Not so much because of his accomplishments, but because of the way he conducted himself during times of crisis. He had known about Wedge in his youth, knew about his uncle's endeavours through stories from his mother and the history lessons during his schooling. He knew that Wedge had been a hero with the Rebel Alliance and later on the New Republic, but he never fully understood why until now. He allowed a smile to creep onto his face as he began walking down the corridor. Most of the friends he had growing up didn't have a hero, it was something the Chiss didn't consider. The few that did, only had one to look up to. Jag didn't realize until know that he was fortunate to have two heroes. He only hoped that one day, he could be half the hero that Baron Soontir Fel and Wedge Antilles were.
***
***Minor Spoilers from Dark Journey and Rebel Dream. This takes place within the first seven days that our young pilots arrive on Borleias.
CHAPTER ONE
Colonel Jagged Fel was not accustomed to uncertainty. He stood outside the office of his uncle, Wedge Antilles, his fist hovering in mid- knock. The New Republic had reclaimed Borleias a little more than a standard month ago, and Jag himself had arrived only hours ago with two rag- tag squadrons that had accompanied him from Hapes. He intended to aide the New Republic in any way he could, however it was that intention that plagued him now in the late evening hours.
He was about to ask a favour of a man he barely knew. During his tenure as a liaison between the New Republic and the Imperial Remnant, he spent most of his time away from both sides, and the time he wished he'd had to get to know his uncle was never available to him. He had a feeling that Wedge would give in to his favour; he had heard that his uncle was a fair man, a man who possessed more military savvy than many political figures cared to admit. Yet, something nagged at him to forego this idea of his. Something gnawed at his courage, preventing his fist from making impact with the door. Jag frowned as his hand fell back to his side.
He knew exactly why he hesitated and it had nothing to do with Wedge. If my father knew that I was here, knew what I was about to do, he'd kill me. Jag sighed. The last conversation he had with his father instantly came to his mind, and General Baron Soontir Fel's words still had the power to scold, long after they had been spoken. I expected better of you--a not uncommon dynamic between fathers and their sons. Facing the wrath of his father, disappointing him yet again, was a fate worse than death, Jag had decided long ago. His father wasn't always a hard man to deal with. Out of uniform, Soontir Fel was a kind, compassionate man, but once in uniform, his military training brought about a different facade, one Jag both feared and respected.
His actions here, however, would be considered rash. Rebellious, perhaps, and that would only damage his relationship with his father a little further. However, if I don't go ahead with this, I'm going to continue throughout this war with the Yuuzhan Vong feeling as if I haven't done my share in aiding the galaxy in some way. Father will be disappointed, but he will understand my reasoning.
He straightened and knocked on the door. It was only a matter of seconds before the door rolled back, and Wedge Antilles stood there, smiling through his weariness. Behind him, Jag noticed Luke Skywalker standing next to a corner desk. The Jedi Master looked over and smiled.
"Jag!" Wedge stepped away from the door, making room for Jag to enter. "It's good to see you! C'mon in!"
Jag bowed respectfully to his uncle, not moving into the office. "I apologize for stopping by so late. I didn't mean to interrupt--"
Wedge waved away the comment, the smile still on his face. "Nonsense! Luke and I were just talking." He clasped Jag on the shoulder, ushering him into the office. "Besides, I always have time for family."
Luke nodded to Wedge and Jag. "I'll leave the two of you to talk."
Jag executed the same bow to Luke. "Please don't leave on my account, Master Skywalker. I'm not here on personal business."
"Oh." Luke looked mildly surprised as he turned to Wedge. They glanced at each other, exchanging conspiratorial smiles. The Jedi Master took a seat in front of Wedge's desk.
Wedge closed the door and gestured to a seat next to Luke. "Have a seat, Jag, and tell us what's on your mind." His uncle circled his desk and seated himself, taking up a glass of amber liquid.
Unsure what the look between his uncle and Luke meant, Jag shrugged it off and took the proffered seat, maintaining his formality. "I overheard some of your E-Wing pilots discussing a reconnaissance mission to the Kesna Sector."
Wedge turned an annoyed face to Luke, rolling his eyes. "Remind me at our next meeting, Luke, to reiterate the definition of the word 'classified'." Jag noticed a slight grin on the Jedi Master's face as Wedge looked back to him and sighed. "Kesna is on the fringes of the Sesswenna Sector, closer to Averam than to Coruscant. It's mostly made up of uninhabitable worlds. The last recon we had there was six months ago, and there were no signs of Yuuzhan Vong activity." Wedge finished his drink, setting the empty glass down in front of him, his fingers still wrapped around it. "With the enemy on Coruscant, the Vong could use Kesna against us, waging a war on two fronts should they decide to throw a full military assault on Borleias. However, if they are not there, Kesna could be used later on as a staging area for our troops when we take back Coruscant."
The confidence in his uncle's voice was refreshing. Jag had heard too many talking about surrender and failure lately that the determination in Wedge's voice sparked his own further. "I thought that E-Wings were not equipped for long-range recon operations?"
"They're not." Wedge snorted. "E-Wings have the speed and the firepower required for medium assault and close support for convoys or to reinforce planetary defences, such as here at Borleias. Because I'm lacking in supplies, I don't have any unmanned probes to send to Kesna, so, I'm sending five of my fastest ships. A modified Corellian Corvette will accompany them as a command ship, and each E-Wing will be hitting a different system . It will take them about seven days, and the information they'll gather won't be nearly enough, but it will help aide us in piecing together what's going on in Kesna, if anything. I'd prefer to keep them here, but this information could be critical down the line. "
"I see."
"You have a suggestion, Colonel?"
Jag blinked, not realizing he had been lost in his thoughts, and turned toward Luke. The Jedi Master was studying him pensively, and Jag had the sudden feeling that his thoughts were no longer his own. He regained his composure, and nodded. "Yes, I do." While he spoke, he kept his attention divided between the two veterans. "Your E-Wings and the Chiss Clawcraft have a number of similarities. Both ships are exceptionally manoeuvrable, fast, and have superior firepower. Clawcraft can be used in the same capacity as your E-Wings; either for modular support or planetary defence. However, I can take it one step further." Wedge raised an eyebrow, and Jag knew he had his unsolicited attention. "Over the past five years, one-third of our starfighters have been upgraded with advanced long-range sensors and in-flight mapping abilities. As you both know, the Chiss have been mapping the Unknown Regions for decades. I, myself, have taken part in a number of recent expeditions. I know what to look for, what kind of information you need. With the Vong setting up shop on Pyria VI, you're going to need as many fighters as you can get stationed here, and your E-Wings are suited for that purpose." He paused briefly, taking a deep breath. "Provide me with a map of Kesna and strategic points of interest marked on it, and I'll get the information you need in three days."
Wedge nodded slowly. "A very interesting suggestion, Jag, but I don't see how sending twelve ships instead of five is going to be more effective. You said yourself that I need as many fighters here to aide in our defence."
"I didn't say anything about sending twelve ships, sir." Before Wedge or Luke could interject, Jag went on. "Only two Clawcraft arrived from Hapes, as I'm sure you're aware. My second-in-command, Shawnkyr Nuruodo, is taking over the squadrons while I assist with your Twin Suns Squadron, and she will remain here. I'd go alone."
He didn't think his uncle's eyes could pop so far out of his head, but Wedge surprised him. That initial shock was immediately erased with an expression that Jag couldn't decipher. However, Luke was the first to speak.
"Our last recon to Kesna was six months ago. If the Vong are there, you run a very high risk of being detected, no matter where you jump in. If that happens, you could be captured or killed, and if you are captured, you'll be tortured and turned into one of their slaves."
The intensity on the Jedi Master's face was chilling and for a brief moment Jag wondered if Luke had experienced one of those Jedi visions he had heard about. No, he's simply voicing a concern, one that I've thought about a lot while walking to this office. He returned Luke's stare, hoping he portrayed the same intensity. "That won't happen. I'd kill myself before the Vong got me."
Wedge started to say something, but Jag interrupted before his uncle could get the words out. "There is an advantage to sending me alone, sir. The Vong have only encountered the Chiss on a handful of occasions, mostly during missions where we've assisted the New Republic. They know who we are, but for whatever reason they have yet to attack the Unknown Regions. Either we don't matter to them or they have something lined up for us later on. They know that we have aided you from time-to-time, yet they are smart enough to realize that we are not aligned with you."
Wedge continued to stare at him with that unreadable look. It made Jag slightly uncomfortable. "Go on." His voice revealed no emotion.
"If I go to Kesna on my own and there is a Vong fleet there, they will most likely consider me as a long-range scout for the Chiss, checking things out since they've taken Coruscant. There would be nothing in my ship's logs or my arrival that would indicate that I'm affiliated with your resistance group here, should my ship be captured. I'll plant false information to make them think I was nothing more than a long-range scout for the Chiss. I don't think they'll concern themselves too much with one fighter." He glanced at Luke, then back to his uncle. "You need all the support you can get to help defend Borleias. Why risk five ships and their support on a recon mission when you can risk only one? Your loss won't be as great if one ship goes down instead of five. I'm more expendable--"
"No!" Wedge pushed himself up from his desk in one fluent motion, his action so swift the chair he was sitting in fell to the floor. "Don't ever say that again, Jagged! No one is more expendable than anyone else here. Not you, not me! I'm surprised to hear such talk coming from the son of Soontir Fel!"
There was no mistaking the anger in Wedge's voice and it had the power to silence and reprimand at the same time. Jag stared wide-eyed up at his uncle. The expression on his face had an eerie resemblance to his father's. Wedge's eyes narrowed at they seemed to bore right through to his soul, and his lips pursed into a tight, angry frown.
The silence blanketing the room was deafening. Jag could feel Luke's stare flitting between himself and Wedge. He rose from his seat, placing his hands palm-down on the desk. Whenever he'd had discussions like this with his father, it usually resulted in Jag becoming too impassioned and Soontir showing disapproval towards his son's pleas. He hoped things would be different with Wedge. He hoped his uncle would listen, instead of lecture him.
He took a deep breath, locking stares with Wedge. " To the Chiss, knowledge is power. The more you know about your enemy, the better your chances of destroying them piece-by-piece before the eventual explosion. I don't need to remind either of you of Grand Admiral Thrawn." He paused briefly then continued. "The Chiss parliament and my father are not willing to make any commitments to the ongoing war because they don't know enough about the Vong yet to gauge how they will react. They are being cautious, and I have no problem with that. Caution is good. However, that is not what I want.
"I have been a liaison between the New Republic, the Imperial Remnant, and the Chiss for a while now. I have engaged the Vong in only a handful of skirmishes. I have spent most of my time either performing recon missions or sitting in the Unknown Regions waiting for my next command--"
"And that's a bad thing?" Wedge folded his arms across his chest, his expression softening, but only slightly.
Jag sighed, lowering his head. He studied his hands and wondered how he could make his uncle see how much this recon mission to Kesna meant to him. He sighed again, bringing his gaze back to Wedge. This time he did not hide his feelings behind a mask of severity. If he was going to get his point across, he would have to appeal to his uncle's rebellious heart.
"I feel as if I'm standing behind a transparisteel window. The Unknown Regions are behind me and the rest of the galaxy is in front. I'm watching everything fall down around me. The universe is changing; the Yuuzhan Vong are unleashing a plague that is destroying worlds, sentient beings, and here I am, safe behind my window. I have this sense of security because I'm behind the transparisteel, but that is nothing but a false belief. Soon, that window is going to develop a crack and then the Unknown Regions will be subjected to the same cruelty and debauchery as the rest of the galaxy. None of us are safe.
"I feel as if I'm not contributing enough to the cause. Yes, I am joining your Twin Suns Squadron and yes, I have engaged the enemy on a number of occasions, but that's not enough for me. I need to do more. I have to do more. This is what I was trained for and I feel as if I'm being held back for some unknown reason." He leaned over the desk, still holding Wedge's stare. He was barely aware of movement to his right. Luke had risen from his seat and retreated to a corner of the room, granting them some privacy. "Please, uncle. Please. Let me do more. Let me do this one recon mission for you. I can get you the data you need. I may not be able to hit five systems at once, but I know what to look for, what you need. Three days is all I ask for."
Wedge blew out a long breath, glancing away to look at some invisible point on the wall. He looked weary and saddened, his eyes losing some of their sparkle. He slumped visibly, turning his stare back to him. For a moment, Jag felt surprise wash over him. The anguish displayed plainly on the other man's face was something he had not expected.
When Wedge spoke, his voice was quiet. "As a parent, we do everything in our power to protect our children from danger. It's easy when they're smaller because their fears are simple and easily disposed of. As they get older, they develop their own thought process, their own state of mind and it's harder for us to protect our children because they are able to make logical decisions on their own and defend themselves from danger. Still, it doesn't stop us from worrying about them, wanting to protect and to keep that danger away from them, like when they were small."
He leaned forward and placed his hands on the desk, mimicking Jag's stance. The young pilot's heart sank as he truly listened to his uncle's words. He's not going to send me because I'm family. He struggled to keep his gaze focused on Wedge, but failed. He dropped his head, fixing his stare on his hands once again, waiting for the acknowledgement from Wedge that he would not be going to Kesna. Another failure to add to the unimpressive streak of disappointments that seemed to follow him lately.
"Those feelings extend to you as well, Jag. Your arrival here adds a different level of concern. You're a damn good pilot and having you here to assist is something I am truly grateful for. However, no one can predict the outcome of our defence of Borleias. If something were to happen to you, not only do I lose a pilot, I lose a member of my family. I'm not a stupid man. I know that is a consequence of war, but that doesn't mean that I want a moment to come where I have to contact your family and tell your mother--my sister--that her third child is dead."
Wedge sighed. There was another awkward silence and Jag suddenly wished that he had never come to Borleias. He'd prefer to stay in the Unknown Regions then stand here and listen to his uncle tell him he wasn't going on a recon mission simply because they were family. He stood up, drawing his hands away from the desk and allowed them to fall to his sides. He raised his head, focusing his stare beyond Wedge. He couldn't bring himself to look at his uncle. He didn't need to see his father's expression staring back at him.
"If you truly feel that you need to do this, however, I will support you in any way I can."
Jag's eyes flicked to Wedge. His uncle was studying him, his hands behind his back. His expression was still sombre, however there was no disappointment in his eyes. Jag couldn't have been more surprised by those words; he believed that Wedge wasn't going to allow him to go on this mission. "Excuse me?"
A small grin tugged at the corner of Wedge's lips. "I can understand your feelings of inadequacy; knowing that you could do more but being restrained by a government that is unwilling to support you one hundred percent. I've been in that position myself, more times that I care to remember." He looked over to where Luke stood, then back to Jag. "I'm not thrilled about letting you do this, especially since we have no idea if the Vong are at Kesna. However, you have mentioned that you've been on assignments like this before, and I trust that you'll know when to get your ass out of there should trouble lay in wait."
Wedge walked around the desk and stood next to Jag. He turned to face his uncle, the shock slowly leaving him. "You have three days, Jag. If you're not back in three days or if I have had no contact with you since then, I'll have to assume the worst. I can't afford to send people after you."
Jag nodded, falling crisply back into formality. "I understand."
He began to bow respectfully to Wedge, but that was immediately halted when his uncle pulled him into an embrace. He stiffened, not use to such displays of emotion, then hesitantly hugged Wedge back.
"Come back safe, Jag." Wedge said, stepping away from him. "Don't give me that reason to contact your parents." He extended his hand to him.
Jag shook the proffered hand. "I won't."
"Good. You'll leave in the morning. Come see me one hour before your departure. I'll have a detailed map of Kesna ready for you." He turned away from him, walking back around to his desk. "Now, you should leave before I change my mind."
He bowed to his uncle, even though Wedge still had his back to him. Jag turned and repeated the gesture to the Jedi Master. Luke grinned, executing a salute. Jag walked out of the office and when the door closed behind him, he leaned heavily against the wall. He had gone into the meeting unsure of Wedge would say, experienced a moment where he thought his suggestion had been shot down without any further thought, then was surprised by Wedge's decision to allow him to Kesna. His heart beat hard in his chest, and Jag felt as if had just finished running laps around the base's perimeter.
Growing up, he had always thought of his father as his only true hero. Not so much because of his accomplishments, but because of the way he conducted himself during times of crisis. He had known about Wedge in his youth, knew about his uncle's endeavours through stories from his mother and the history lessons during his schooling. He knew that Wedge had been a hero with the Rebel Alliance and later on the New Republic, but he never fully understood why until now. He allowed a smile to creep onto his face as he began walking down the corridor. Most of the friends he had growing up didn't have a hero, it was something the Chiss didn't consider. The few that did, only had one to look up to. Jag didn't realize until know that he was fortunate to have two heroes. He only hoped that one day, he could be half the hero that Baron Soontir Fel and Wedge Antilles were.
***