First story. Tell me what you think. Thanks. SM owns the characters. J

I added a little bit more to this Chapter, hope you like.

Bella

As if I never existed. Nothing I felt nothing. Mhm. This must be what shock feels like. I don't know how long I stood there replaying our conversation, well really Edwards conversation. Everything he said, every word felt like a knife slicing bits of my heart away. And now there was nothing. A whole inside my chest. I must have been standing for awhile because my legs finally gave out. Light turned to dusk, then finally darkness. Darkness is what my future held. My future walked out of my life forever.

I heard someone approach. I didn't move, I don't think I could have if I wanted to. I was still in shock. That someone finally crouched down in front of me, there was a look of relief apparent on his face. Sam. One of the kids from the Rez. He didn't say anything, just scooped me up in his arms.

He started walking back to my house, I wanted to kick and scream. What if he came back for me? What if he realized that he didn't mean what he said?? I couldn't leave now. But nothing came out, I let my head lay on Sam's shoulder. It was my fault. Being so clumsy. A stupid paper cut made me lose the most important thing in my life, my very existence. The words he said. He couldn't mean he didn't love me. I wasn't meant to be in his world. How could he say such things. Of course, he meant it. How could someone like him love someone like me. I have known it since we first met really. But I was so drawn to him, to all of them. My family. Alice. My beautiful pixie best friend. Emmet, my big teddy bear brother. Esme and Carlisle. The parents I never had. I loved them so much. Rosalie. I even loved her, even though she made it known she was never a fan of mine. I envied her beauty and her grace. I really looked up to her as a sister. And Jasper. I will miss him too. I don't blame him. I know he has to feel bad. I could never blame him. The bloodlust called to all of them. I must have zoned out again because we finally made it back to my house. There were so many people, rushing to me asking me if I was ok. Apparently I had been gone awhile, while I felt bad for making them all worry. I just wanted to go to my room and suffer by myself. Sam finally let me go, but I was attacked by my dad. He was closer to tears then I had ever seen him. And that made me break down. Huge body shaking sobs came over me, I couldn't stop. He finally got me inside and into my bed, I told him to go.

I laid there forever it seemed just crying, crying for the family I lost. I felt so hollow. Then the next thing I know I was over come by sleep.

I dreamt of them, my family. We were sitting around laughing and talking like old times, when suddenly everyone starting getting up and vanishing one by one. Edward was the last, and he looked at me and said, I'm sorry. I don't love you, and he was gone. I screamed, it actually woke myself up. I finally calmed down, and laid back down and stared out my window, the window that would never be an entrance for Edward again.

Morning light started creeping its way through my window, cast a warm feeling on my body. It didn't touch the chill I had though. I hadn't gone back to sleep. Charlie asked if I was going to school, how could I? I took the day off.

A day turned into a week, I missed a week of school. I didn't eat and I barely slept. When I did pass out from exhaustion I was awoken by my own screams. I knew I had to get out of this state, I was scaring Charlie, and Jacob. My best friend, he tried talking to me. But it was no use. After the end of week, I finally decided I needed to go back to school. I felt it would bring a distraction.

My first day back at school, I had already realized my mistake. Everyone stared, I heard gossip. How I ended up in a mental ward, or moved back to Jacksonville to be with my mom, and my personal favorite I had committed suicide. Right. This went on for a few months. I somehow passed my classes, I don't know how. I was literally a walking zombie. My friendships suffered, I had no friends. Even Jacob stopped trying. Graduation came and went. I never left my room.

I woke up one day and just had to get out of my room. I got out of bed, brushed my teeth. And put on some jeans and a t-shirt. I grabbed my keys, and told Charlie I was going for a ride. He looked at me, I could see his worry.

"Don't worry dad, I just finally need to get out of the house, maybe clear my head."

"That's good Bells, I'm glad. Just be careful. See you later?"

"Yea dad. Love you." "Love you too Bell's"

I got in my beat up truck and started the engine. My heart gave a lurch every time I looked at the area where a new cd player should have been. It was empty, I ripped that piece of shit out. Well, I took a screwdriver too it. Same thing. I started to drive, I drove for awhile and before I knew it I had parked and started walking. I let my feet carry me, right to our meadow. It too seemed empty. Empty without him. I sat down and started to replay it again in my head. This must have been the millionth time, but instead of getting catatonic like normal. I started to get angry. Oh. A different emotion. I like that. I let it take over, let the rage fill me.

My world wasn't his. He didn't love me. He. He thought I didn't belong. He just decided to leave. He decided all this bullshit without letting me get any sort of word in. The more I thought about it, shit, he did that a lot. No he thought it was to dangerous for me. No you shouldn't do that, for my well being. You are to fragile love.

"FUCK YOU EDWARD MASEN CULLEN." I had my hands in a fist, it felt so good to scream. I screamed for a good 5 minutes. I finally stopped, and I felt the edge of a smile come to my lips.

That was my world. I had never felt like I had belong anywhere else before. Not like with them. Them. You know the more I think about them, I felt my anger rise again. God this felt good. If they loved me they would have at least said goodbye. Instead of running away and the request of the oh wonderful Edward. Fuck that. Fine they don't want me, I'm done pining for a family that didn't really want me or love me.

But I will be damned, pardon the pun, if I don't get what I want. And I knew just the people to go to. I remember the stories Edward and Carisle use to tell me. The Volturi. I smirked. Oh, this should be good.