Playing Imprint
I don't own Twilight or any characters from twilight.
Red Light Zone
The Kooks - Naive
Jessica babbled about the zombie movie and Mike and ... stuff. I wasn't paying close attention as we headed towards McDonalds. Across the street sat One-Eyed Pete's advertising beer with metal doors propped open. Voices, music and clinking glass drifted out into the night. I felt déjà vu noticing four men leaning against the wall beside the doors. Jessica was focused on our destination. I stopped to take in the familiar scene of the intimidating men on a dark street.
The shorter dark character looked interested when I stared frozen on the side walk. It reminded me of the night E-, he rescued me.
*"Bella?" Jessica whispered. "What are you doing?"
"I think I know them..." I knew I should be avoiding them and my memory. My body remembered the fear from that night all to well and responded in kind.
"Bella, come on!"
Slowly I headed towards the four men. I felt adrenalin pumping through me. But didn't see much reason for my fear.
Jessica grabbed my arm.
"Bella! You can't go in a bar!"
"I'm not going in, I just want to see something..."
"Are you crazy? Are you suicidal?"
I turned back to the men who were watching us with amusement.
"Bella, stop this right now!" It was the most beautiful voice. It was his velvety voice. My senses became more aware.
"Go back to Jessica, you promised-nothing stupid."
While deliberating what to do, Edward's voice continue to plead and order me to turn around. I kept walking while I enjoyed his voice.
"Hi," one of the men called. "Can I help you with something? You look lost."
I shook my head.
"Can I buy you a drink?" The short man offered with a sly smile.
"I don't drink." They looked at each other.
"What about cola? Or a coffee?" He threw an arm around my shoulders. His beautiful voice was yelling at me fiercely. He was so angry with my right now. I drank in every word that he said. This was stupid and reckless. But I couldn't bare to stop making him talk.
I let the men lead me into the bar. It was smoky and hurt my eyes. There were pool tables, a long bar taking up the length of the bar, a lot people a table set up. I soaked up every word that Edward said.
Jessica jerked through the doors, scanned the bar until she saw me. She was sulky as she came to sit with us at the bar. She gave me a glare and I knew that I would pay for this later.
The short man set up a game of pool for the two of us. His touching sent fearful shivers up my spine. This just elicited more words from him making me very happy. He held me every time I attempted to take a shot and made sure that I didn't smack anyone in there with the pool cue. There was still an air of danger about the men.
Soon Jessica was tapping her phone showing me the time. I explained that I had to go but thanked them for teaching me how to play pool. His voice disappeared.
"Can I see you again?" I asked Matthew.
"I was hoping you'd say that. By the way, I have some work you might be interested in." He handed me a business card. I'd have to see him again if I wanted to hear his voice again. I was determined to make sure that happened.
It had been a month since the night I had met Matthew. It had been three weeks since I had started going to his business working as a waitress during the earlier hours and I had met Giselle. I was eager, because the club started adrenalin pumping brought his beautiful voice to me. Giselle was the "Mom" for the girls that worked for him. She was grooming me to work at his bar. The club was a strip joint. At first I didn't think I would go through with it. I just stuck around because so often, I would feel shivers of danger here. But each week, I had to up the ante to feel the danger. At first simple waitressing had brought it to me.
I was assured I could back out of the arrangement at any time. I observed the bouncers were protective of the girls and Matthew spoke nicely to the girls. Apparently, there weren't enough strippers to go around in these parts. They were very well paid and he treated them well to make sure that they didn't migrate to another club. I was warned about customers though. Some of them could be a problem and they had bouncers for a reason. They couldn't foresee all behaviour. Stalkers were usually the main concern. I appreciated the pepper spray Charlie had given me.
Some of the girls drank and did drugs to get through the nights. But some of them seemed to accept the job and found some empowerment in their sexuality. Giselle wanted me strong and healthy to join their ranks. She wanted me pole dancing which required some level of fitness. Being the klutz that I am the idea terrified me. But Giselle was convinced she could teach me.
I heard him every visit to the club. It drove me to visit more often and push the limits a little bit further each time. I had to eat properly and do some weight lifting starting three weeks ago. It definite helped me under Giselle's instructions. I was amazed when Giselle true to her word had me pole dancing and I looked ok. Of course, I couldn't compete with the experienced dancers. I held off going on stage all week. I didn't think that I would hear his voice on stage. But if I had rowdy enough audience I might? I thought about it all week. But, I had come this far and so I decided to go for it.
At the very least, it was something that got me out of the house and distracted me from my misery. I wasn't happy. I was going to run out of places to tell Charlie I was staying overnight once I started stripping during the night. He was just so relieved that I was eating and going out that he probably didn't realize how much free reign he had given me.
I had been wearing skimpier outfits waitressing. Guys were starting to notice me as I followed Giselle's guide with make-up and clothes. They looked at me like prey. Their eyes hunted me around the room. Some of them daring to put a hand on my back, hold me around the waist as I gave panicked looked to the bouncers who were there right away. I felt shivers go down my back and him screaming in my ear frantically. He didn't want this. But he didn't hold up his promises. I was breaking his promise too. I wouldn't be the only one keeping their promise any more.
So tonight, here I was after my first night on stage. I had worked just three hours and was taking home four hundred dollars. I had paired up with a blonde girl who was still going to high school too. Of course, we wore tiny catholic school girl outfits.
When I walked back to the change rooms a wave of emotions I had kept in check crashed over me. I wanted outside into the night air immediately. I threw on the school girl outfit not thinking and grabbed a bunny hair sweater from my bag and ran out the side door. I should have thought more carefully and pulled out my street clothes, runners, jeans and a t-shirt.
My heart pounded in my chest and for some reason I didn't want to know tears bubbled and surged in my chest. I choked them back leaning my back against the brick wall at the back exit. I felt like a whore. I had known in the back of my head. But I had been so intent on hearing his voice I had pushed those thoughts and feelings away. And now it all came down on me leaving me feeling shocked and choked up. It suffocated me as I clutched my waist trying to hold myself together. I couldn't get air into my lungs. The hole in my chest was about to let me fall apart.
"Bella?" A low husky voice called my name. Panic! My head jerked up to see who was seeing me like this. I didn't recognize who it was. He was standing near the parking lot shared with the cinema. I wasn't expecting to see anyone I would know at this hour on a school night.
I looked more closely. A tall man who looked around twenty had short black hair, was built like a tank and wearing only a t-shirt with a tattoo on his shoulder. He appeared to be standing with four brothers dressed similar and with the same skin and hair. None of them were really better dressed for the cold than I was only I was shivering now and they weren't. As they looked over me I became extremely aware of my exposed legs and high heels. I wanted to slip back into the club away from them. They definitely could see what slut I was.
"Sorry?" I asked. I couldn't figure out who this was even though he seemed familiar to me. I swiped at the tear that had spilled over and made an effort to calm myself. It was bad enough that whoever this was had probably figured out that I'm stripping now. I didn't need them to know that I was ashamed, I didn't need their pity. He was staring at me intensely. I felt a connection for a moment, so I shook my head to clear the strange moment.
"It's me, Jacob Black." Immediately I recognized him. I hadn't seen him since last he came by my place with Billy to watch a game. I felt a small smile touch my lips.
"Jake? It's a school night, what are you doing here?" His friends seemed amused that he knew me but also seemed to be dealing with something else as knowing glances passed between them.
"I could ask you the same thing. And..." He frowned and looked at the building. "When did you start stripping?" I felt awkward and exposed in every way imaginable.
"Charlie does know..anything..I'm eighteen and I didn't have enough saved for college for September. I'll have to start the next semester. And don't judge me." I choked out trying to sound indignant. Couldn't he have seen me on another night?
"But when did you start this? I heard you just started to get better." He looked so concerned for me. I wasn't sure how much of a pretence I could keep up for him.
I tried to smile but it probably looked more like a grimace. I could see that he honestly cared.
"I just worked my first night. It's an adjustment." I admitted. "I'm not a good waitress and this job just found me. It should work for now." I assured him.
"Bella, I'm Sam. You know, we're going to have to tell Charlie." It was the same man who had found me in the woods. "I know you're going through a hard time right now, but this isn't a healthy response."
After all of my hard work, he was threatening to take the voice I had worked hard so hear. I felt crushed. Jacob seemed to wince at my reaction. I wanted to sob hearing that Charlie would be told.
"You can't do that. You can't mess this up for me. If Charlie finds out, I'll just move out. I can get my own place if I have to. I earned four hundred dollars take home pay on a slow night and I left early. I could earn enough to support myself and put away for college at the same time. I'd rather stay with Charlie though." Jacob flashed a look at Sam that I didn't quite catch. Sam pressed on.
"You and I both know this isn't about money. What are you getting at the club? What are you looking for?" As usual I was an open book. My jaw dropped that he knew so easily. "I don't understand. You didn't enjoy your night. That much we can see. So what are you doing here?" This was getting much too personal. I was finished with Sam.
"Go fuck yourself. I don't have to explain myself to you. I'm freezing here." I was indeed so cold I was shaking and turning blue. "I'm going home. You're going to mind your own business." I headed to my truck.
"Sam." Jacob growled out. "You're chasing away my imprint." For a fleeting moment, I was curious, but I wanted to get away from Sam.
"Are you hungry?" Sam asked with resignation. I stopped in my tracks. I considered running for the truck but figured I might get him to keep his mouth shut by at least answering easy questions.
"No. I'm cold." I answered curtly.
"Can Jake drive you to my place? We need to talk and maybe we can find a change of clothes for you."
Jacob was following this conversation like a tennis match.
"My clothes are fine." I was dying to change my clothes but I wasn't going to let him see I was vulnerable right now. "Besides, I have jeans and a t-shirt in my bag. Why would I want to go home with you?" I asked defensively. Was he going to blackmail with this information? I really shouldn't have mentioned my earnings.
"Sam?" Jacob whined. They exchanged looks. Jacob came and held my hands and looked into my eyes. I felt a shock pass through us and my body was drawn to him. I felt contentment for the first time in a long time. "Bella, we just want to talk to you. You don't belong here." He glanced at the club. My thoughts went to him.
"I'm disposable, of course I belong here." As soon as it flew out of my mouth I felt bad because he looked like I just hit him.
"I'm sorry. I just meant... yeah, you can drive me. Just don't give me that sad face okay?" His face broke into a huge smile and he swept me into a bear hug. He didn't put me down as he walked me to my truck with my bag dangling at my side. I felt an unfamiliar smile on my face.
His friends seemed to be torn between amusement and concern at my occupation. I sorely wished they would all just go away.
I huddled and shivered into Jacob's side for the drive. He was so warm that he felt like water when I was dehydrated because I was so cold.
"I really wish you didn't see me like this tonight." I mumbled. "I barely know you. This is more private information than I care to share." I felt sleep pulling on me.
His voice was soft. "I've already seen you when Sam brought you back from the woods. That was private as well. I'm getting used to it. I just wish I could see you happy." I sighed enjoying his scent and comfort.
"This is going to sound strange but you're making me feel happy right now. I feel ... safe with you. Like nothing can touch me." I was safe from my own memories even tucked beside Jacob's side.
"That doesn't sound strange to me. I'm glad to hear that."
We didn't have the talk in the end. I woke up with the sun high in the sky. I could hear sounds coming from down hall. Dishes clattering. My head hurt and my mouth was dry. I was in an unfamiliar bedroom but didn't panic. The place felt calm. I smelled muffins cooking. I sat up and saw that I had been changed into shorts and t-shirt. I wasn't pleased thinking about Jacob or his friends changing my clothes. I got up and padded the cold floor down the hall and into the kitchen. A young woman was facing away from me, with long dark hair and her hands in a sink.
"Hi." I said.
She turned her face to me and I saw we scars running down her face. She had a kind smile.
"Hi. I hope you don't mind, but I changed your clothes. I didn't think they would be comfortable for sleeping in. You were sleeping like the dead. My name's Emily by the way." Why was I so out of it last night? "Do you think someone might have slipped something in your drink last night?" I stared at her with my mouth hanging open. She turned back to the dishes. "Or do you usually pass out like that? Jake said you were talking in your sleep." I groaned inwardly. I had no memory of my dreams, I cringed to think what I had said.
"Maybe someone did. But I do talk in my sleep. Usually, someone changing my clothes would wake me up. It's a little scary that I don't remember that. What time is it?"
"Schools about to get out. You scared us when you wouldn't wake up this morning. We managed to get you to wake up enough to talk, but you were out of it. We spoke to Charlie and said your truck broke down and that you weren't feeling well. As soon as Jake gets here from school, we're going to have a talk." I felt foreboding. She saw my face.
"Bella, they care about you. They don't want you to get hurt. You understand that right?" I nodded dumbly. She spoke with tenderness. As though she feared I would bolt at any moment. Sadly, her instincts were correct. I wanted to run away from the reality they were about to bring down on me. She gave me a smile before pulling open the oven door to look inside.
"They're ready." She said cheerfully and pulled the tray with a dish towel. She let it cool on the countertop. "Are you thirsty?" I nodded. I still wasn't talking. I was focused on not running. She took a glass out of the cupboard and poured me a glass of water from the sink. I drank it quickly. My head was still hurting.
The door opened and Sam walked in heading straight towards me. I felt dread for a moment but saw a beautiful smile on his face. He passed me and gathered Emily into his arms and gave her loving smile. It felt like an intimate moment and I walked out of the kitchen area and stood by the window leaning against the wall. I stared blankly at the trees outside.
"Bella, can you come sit down. Jake's going to be here soon. We are going to have that talk. Your eyes were dilated last night and there was a man waiting in his car. I think you were drugged. Which only reinforces my point. Bouncer's or not, it's not safe." I shuddered thinking of what might have happened if Jake hadn't been there.
"But how is it any of your business?" He frowned.
"Look, wait for Jake. We've got a lot to talk about." I crossed my arms and looked at him feeling like a petulant child.
"I want to go home."
"If you go straight home without talking, I will go have this talk with Charlie instead." My heart caught in my throat. He was milking that threat for all it was worth. Jacob burst, his eyes scanned the room and stopped at me. He had the same look in his eye as Sam had when he saw Emily. I felt butterflies in my stomach and my heart skipped a beat. I felt a spark when he hugged me. I hardly knew him, but it felt as though he knew me. I was staring at his dark eyes and it felt like he was warming me from the inside. There was something there but I didn't know what it was. Was it just in my head?
*Page 108 to 114, darkened text is from New Moon SM.
A/N: I think imprinting is messed up. The imprints have too much control over their wolves and I doubt that all imprints are inherently good people. I'm sure some would be in the middle of self-destruct modes which could break a wolf and hurt the pack. So, this is exploring essentially exploring imprinting.