Kimi ni Aitai
by Meitantei Lili
Detective Conan © Gosho Aoyama, all rights reserved.
One thought raced through her mind on that sleepless night.
I want to see you.
Dare I call him? Ran asked herself. "He's not home," she said out loud. "He's never home anymore." Her voice was filled with bitter longing.
But she knew that if she didn't call him that night, if she didn't hear his voice, she would go crazy.
With shaking hands, she pulled out her cell phone – the cell phone that he had given her – and dialed a number familiar to her heart.
Ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring…
"Hi, this is Kudou. I'm not here right now, so leave me a message."
Ran smiled. At least his answering machine was still on. At least she got to hear his voice. The beep sounded, and she prepared to talk to him.
I called you today just to hear you say,
You were not around.
When the message was through, though I wanted to,
I couldn't make a sound.
Why can't I speak? she thought as tears streamed down her face. You idiot! Gathering up the courage to call him, and now, here you are, just crying…
There were so many things that she wanted to tell him, so many things that she wanted to say. And they all tried to come out at the same time, only to get stuck.
I wanna tell you the things I've seen,
I wanna take you to where I've been,
And I wish you were here with me.
She finally found her voice.
"Shin…ichi…" she whispered, "I…I want to see you."
I really miss you – yes I do, yeah -
I really miss you.
Ohhh, yeah, I do.
"And…please…come home."
Click. His tape on the answering machine had run out. She had delayed too long. She turned off her phone and buried her face in her arms, crying to herself.
A small boy watched from the outside, a single tear running down his cheek.
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Conan found the Text Message function on his phone and prepared to write to Ran.
What should he tell her this time? How he's having a great time, wherever he is, having coffee with the police force while discussing a case?
It was such a pathetic lie.
I'm writing to say, I had a wonderful day
Hangin' with my friends.
But the memory dies as the sun reach the skies
I'm alone again.
"Everything is great here," he wrote. "What about yourself? Don't tire yourself too much, okay? Talk to you later…Shinichi."
What else could he say? What else could he say to the girl who was waiting for the one she loved the most, the one she will probably never see again?
He couldn't bear lying to her anymore.
I wanna tell you the weather is fine,
When the night comes around, you were on my mind,
And I wish you were here with me.
With trembling fingers, he pressed the "Send" key. There. It was done.
Maybe the message will make her smile. Maybe it will make her cry. But whatever it made her do, he knew that her bright smile would never be the same again.
And he missed that smile.
Don't you know –
I really miss you – yes I do, yeah –
I really miss you,
Ohhh yeah I do.
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"Good morning, hakase," Conan said dejectedly as he entered the inventor's house.
"Oh, good morning, Shinichi-kun," Agasa replied. "What's with the long face?" Conan just shook his head.
"Well, you have a message," Agasa continued. "I heard the phone ring last night over at your house and I heard someone leaving a message. Why don't you go listen? It could be important?"
"Okay," he replied dully and trudged over to his house. Sure enough, the light on the answering machine was blinking. He pressed the button. There was only silence at first.
"…Shinichi…?" Ran finally spoke. Her voice was breaking, along with Conan's heart.
I called you today, just to hear you say,
You were not around.
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"Someone texted me?" Ran said to herself. "Huh…wonder who it's from." She opened the message, and when she read it, her eyes widened.
"Shinichi…" she said, smiling through her tears. "You're such a baka…"
I'm writing to say, had a wonderful day,
Hangin' with my friends.
"I miss you, Shinichi," Ran said softly. "When you come back, I'm going to beat you to a pulp…"
Conan stood by his phone and nodded as if he'd heard.
"That's fine with me," he whispered. "Beat me all you want…if it makes you smile again."
"I miss you…"
"…and your smile."
Kimi ni aitai. I want to see you.
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So, what'd you think? The song, "I Really Miss You," is sung by Rachel of S Club. It's a very beautiful melody, actually. This fic wasn't supposed to be this sad, actually, but I guess it just happened. Sorry for the sappiness.
Leave a review, please! Thanks!
XO, Lili