The Hat's Jealousies
Slytherin! Scorpius thought as he set the battered old sorting hat on his blonde hair.
You think you belong in the Serpent's House, do you, Scorpius Malfoy? Why is that?
Of course I belong there! I'm clever; my parents always tell me I am. I'm sly; I know how to get what I want. I'm ambitious; I want to get the best grades in my year and be head boy, and then someday...I don't know...be famous? Influence people?
Hmm...
Oh yeah, and I'm pureblood, Scorpius remembered as an afterthought. My mum was a Greengrass, and the Malfoy family I'm sure you know—
Oh yes, you are the thirty-seventh Malfoy boy that has worn me, and I'll tell you something, Scorpius. You don't fit the mold. A right little rebel you are, sneaking away to muggle shops, the hat chuckled, and your father would never have spent an afternoon climbing trees just to sit in the tops and whistle...
But I...but...all the Malfoys have been in Slytherin!
Ah, ah, ah, you know that's not true.
Oh yeah, Bertrand Malfoy was in Gryffindor...
Hah! And you have always liked stories about Bertrand, don't try to tell me otherwise!
No! Not Gryffindor! Scorpius squeezed his hands into fists. Please, my parents would be disgusted, and I wouldn't want to think about what my grandparents would say...
Not to worry, it's not the House of the Lion for you...but what was the first thing that you told me about yourself? You are clever. Ravenclaw, I think. Yes, I do think you belong in Ra—
No, no, no! Only Slytherin. It has to be Slytherin.
The voice was silent for a moment.
I have been looking into young human minds for over a thousand years, said the hat thoughtfully, and I'll admit, there are three things that humans have that make me jealous.
You? Jealous? Scorpius asked curiously.
Yes. First, is your free will. You can be, think and do as you choose. You needn't simply do what you were intended to do. You might have some inborn qualities, conditioned tendencies, or even be under limiting enchantments, but even the Imperius Curse can be shed. Utimately each one of you is free.
Second, is your connection in families. It's a beautiful mystery that I can't quite wrap my hat around...such strong attachment...
Third, is your ability to change. Tonight, you are a Ravenclaw-minded boy who wants to be in Slytherin. I have a few ideas about who you might become, but anything could happen.
Scorpius repeated, Free will, family, and changeability?
Yes—three fascinating, enviable human traits. So, if you wish to be in Slytherin to please your family, then I will honor your choice. Remember, however, that things can change...
The hat made its announcement, and Scorpius claimed the noble title of Slytherin.
Notes:
And that was that. All sorted.
But did Scorpius become head boy? Did he make friends with a certain red-haired Ravenclaw, even thought he was a Slytherin? What kind of muggle shops was he sneaking off to? Did Slytherin House change him, or did he change Slytherin House? Did the Hat ever gain any of the traits it envied? Why did it mention thirty-seven Malfoy boys, not girls? Who was Bertrand Malfoy? Did Scorpius ever recognize the inborn, conditioned, and/or enchanted limitations he was under and did he choose to overcome them or embrace them?
Read about it in Malfoys, Weasleys, and Underestimated Magic.