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The only sound that filled that small, cramped relationship counselor's office was of a pen scratching down notes on a sheet of paper attached to a clipboard. Glancing up, the relationship counselor stared for a moment at the two, nervous young people who had requested a session with him; Lelouch Lamperouge and Kallen KĊzuki. They both seemed very uncomfortable being here, although they were the ones who wanted to come in the first place.

"...So what seems to be the problem?" the relationship counselor finally spoke.

Fidgeting slightly in her seat, Kallen explained, "Well, Lelouch and I...we've been going out for about five months now. He's been nothing but kind and respectful towards me, and I have been nothing but kind and respectful towards him. He even always remembers to wear a condom, too. He's pretty much the perfect boyfriend for me...a really great guy..."

"...So what seems to be the problem?" the relationship counselor repeated.

"That's just it," Kallen replied, "We DON'T have any problems! I mean, we haven't even gotten into a single argument! Ever! It's just so...it's just so...it's just so BORING!!! I suppose this is because of my love for living on the edge, and having been part of a rebellion to overthrow the government, but...I can't take another day being in even the same building as him! I'll surely die of boredom!"

The relationship counselor was quite befuddled. "I've never heard of anyone complaining about having a PERFECT RELATIONSHIP," he remarked, "Mr. Lamperouge, what are your thoughts on this situation?"

Lelouch was just sitting there, with a deep, thoughtful look on his face.

"...Mr. Lamperouge?"

"QUIET, QUIET!" Lelouch snapped, "I'm trying to think of a problem in our relationship that'll contradict Kallen's statement..."

It took Lelouch about three minutes to come up with something. "Oh, remember that time I accidently bumped into you and you spilled your ice cream cone?!"

Kallen nodded. "Yeah, but I had accidentally gotten the wrong flavor, and you bought me a new one, so I was kind of glad it happened,"

"Damn it! Let me think again..."

Suddenly, after five minutes this time, Lelouch realized something. Turning to Kallen, he exclaimed, "...Aren't you gay or something?"

"...OH YEAH! THAT'S RIGHT! YOU'RE GAY, TOO!!" Kallen cried.

Lelouch chuckled. "Yeah, I had forgotten that for a moment! Thinking about Suzaku naked in the shower helped remind me!...And now I have a boner..."

"Yeah! Yeah! I had a boner too after seeing C.C. today in that form-fitting jumpsuit...man, it made me so horny that I wanted to hump a desk!!" Kallen added.

"Just make sure Nina Einstein hadn't already claimed it!!" Lelouch joked, and the two of them burst out into laughter. They were still laughing as they walked out the door, hand in hand.

Once they were gone, the relationship counselor let out a sigh. 'God, I hate working with asians...'