The Birds and the Bees

by Kirby's Cowgirl

This is a story about the homefront. Ruthie Kirby struggles after the death of her fiance, Eddie. Thanks to Kirby's Babe for giving me the mindset to finish this!

Copyright 9/14 by Kirby's Cowgirl

This is fan fic and not for profit, no copyright infringement intended

The Birds and the Bees

"Ruthie, you got some mail." Mrs. Kopachek said gently. She didn't know what she was going to do with the girl. Eddie had been killed three weeks ago, and all Ruthie had done since the memorial service was sit in her room in the dark. Her boss had fired her.

She didn't have the money to take Ruthie to a Doctor. The grocery store had cut off her credit the week before. She was going to have to call Ruthie's mother and tell her to come and get her. And then she would be totally alone. Her husband had died suddenly a few months before.

Ruthie waited until Mrs. Kopachek had closed the door before she picked up the letters on her bedside table. She'd had a letter from Bill's CO the week before, and been terrified that he was dead too. The envelope contained fifty dollars. Lieutenant Hanley had told her that "Kirby" as he called him, was afraid that she might not get the money if he sent it, he was very sorry for her loss, and he was sure that her brother would write her as soon as he was able to.

Ruthie had snorted. Bill was probably in jail. Or whatever they called it in the army. Again. Her older brother was never going to grow up. If the Germans had their way, he might not get the opportunity.

One of today's letters was from Eddie. There were no more tears to cry. She knew the mail got delayed. Since Eddie was an officer, his letters weren't supposed to be censored. But a couple times she'd been sure someone had opened them. She supposed that was why Bill had his CO send the money. She set Eddie's letter aside. She'd put it in the jewelry box he'd bought her, where she kept all his other letters. Maybe she'd even open it someday.

The other letter was from a Capt. Alex West, WAC. Ruthie had no idea what WAC meant. Had Lt. Hanley been killed along with Bill, so a higher ranking officer was writing her? If Bill was dead, she would kill herself. She was almost immediately ashamed. Suicide was a sin. Mrs. Kopachek had no one but her. And she was nothing but a burden.

She slit the envelope open. The paper had roses on it. The letter was from a woman." Women's Army Corps." Ruthie said out loud. That's what WAC meant.

"Dear Miss Ruthie, (I am very sorry, but I don't know your last name)

Ruthie nearly laughed out loud. She had never thought anything would be funny again. How quaint. How polite. She was intrigued.

"My name is Alex West and I had the pleasure of working with your Eddie. We used to eat lunch together when we could. Know that he loved you very much. He showed your photo to everyone.

My husband was killed on Omaha Beach, and I won't bother with all the Army platitudes. He's still dead, it still hurts like hell. It doesn't matter whether you can be proud of him or not. I wish I could be there to talk to you in person."

Ruthie unfolded the letter crease and four hundred dollars fell in her lap! She had never seen so much money in her life.

"I kept Eddie's money for him while he was on assignment. It's not like we have banks here. He was saving every penny he could, and he was so looking forward to getting home and marrying you.

If you feel like getting out of Chicago for awhile, I own a ranch in the Missouri Ozarks, and my family would be glad to have you. It would have to be sort of a working vacation, all the men have gone off to War. If you're willing to swat a cow with a broom, I'm sure they can find something for you to do. Eddie's Mom's pastries have made her famous over here. I know the ranch folks would love some of her cooking."

She'd enclosed a phone number, told Ruthie who to speak to, and wished her the best. And suddenly, Ruthie knew exactly what she was going to do. She was going to go visit an actual ranch. She didn't know anything about livestock but she could cook and keep house. Maybe they would even have a pony she could ride. She'd always wanted one when she was a little girl.

She'd cook dinner for Mrs. Kopachek and talk to her about it. She wanted some pork chops, mashed potatoes, and apple sauce. And maybe she could splurge and buy one fourth of a chocolate cake. Even half ones cost more than anyone in this neighborhood could afford. She suddenly realized how hungry she was .Maybe she would buy a whole cake! They had enough money to pay the rent for awhile if Mrs. Kopachek didn't want to travel.

Ruthie grabbed the first thing she saw in her closet. She hadn't gotten dressed since the day of Eddie's memorial service, she'd just worn her pajamas. She went in the bathroom to use the mirror to pin her hat on, and recoiled in horror. She looked terrible. Scary terrible. Well, she had no one to look pretty for anymore. It didn't matter. She splashed some water on her face, plopped the hat on her head, and headed out the door after tucking the letter and the money in her purse.

She stopped at the corner and waited for traffic. Eddie had held her hand for the first time here. They'd shared their first kiss under the store front awning across the street when he'd walked her home from the movie. There were too many memories here. She suddenly realized that she hated Chicago. She would go to the ranch until the War was over, if they would let her stay that long. She could use Eddie's money to pay her board, and she would work too. She wanted to meet Alex West, a woman who was brave enough to join the WAC's, and go overseas. Ruthie had never done anything for the War effort at all -

She didn't even see the men until the first one grabbed her. She screamed in outrage as he yanked her back against him while the second one tried to snatch her purse. She'd die before she let them have her money. She fell back against the first man, knocking him off balance, and slammed her purse into the second man's nose as hard as she could, feeling it break. Blood splattered everywhere, and he ran off, howling.

The first man had his hands all over her, and Ruthie stomped her high heel into his instep. When he screamed and doubled over, she hit him in the ear with her purse. Blood welled. She hit him again. It suddenly struck her as funny that it had not been her fiancé or her brother who had taught her to fight, but a street kid named Bruno* that she'd befriended many years ago.

Bruno was either still in prison or dead. She wondered if they might have let him out to fight. They'd given Bill the choice of jail or the army. Eddie was dead. Bill was over there fighting Germans. Bruno, who was a good person caught in bad circumstances, had had no chance at all. These thugs had somehow escaped the draft - suddenly something inside Ruthie just snapped.

She beat her mugger in the head with him cowering, and screaming, "Jesus! Lady! I give up! Stop, please stop!" She had never in her life been so glad that she had the three pound piece of brick that Bruno had gotten her in her purse. An elderly man had started across the street to help her, but had changed his mind when he saw how she was attacking her mugger.

Two beat cops came running, blowing their whistles, and when they saw that Ruthie was in no danger, they stopped and grinned at each other. They were delighted to see the punk getting a little of what he deserved. Ruthie had no idea that she was screaming at the top of her lungs, she'd just had enough. She didn't know that her mugger had knifed an elderly lady who fought him over her groceries. She just wanted to kill him.

The two cops watched her beat on the man for awhile, with him screaming and begging them for help, and finally the younger one went to call the paddywagon.

"Ruthie, darlin'," the older one said, " I can't let you kill the man. You need to stop now. What in the world do you have in that pocketbook?"

Finally his calm words got thru, and Ruthie froze. The cop gently reached over and pulled her away from the mugger. "Did he hurt you lass? That's not your blood is it?" He didn't think it was, he thought some of that famous Kirby temper had finally erupted from Ruthie. He'd long thought that the reason she was such a good girl was because her brothers were an embarrassment to her.

"You! You jackass!" Ruthie said to the mugger, and he covered up his head.

She suddenly heard applause, and looked to see the crowd gathered on the street. "Marry me, colleen!" an older man called.

"Get along with you!" the cop shook his fist at him, and the crowd dispersed in a hurry.

"I'm not hurt, Jack." She said to the cop, who she'd known since she was a little girl. He nodded, shook his billy stick at her mugger who was attempting to crawl off, and chuckled when Ruthie's eyes lit up.

The mugger froze, and covered up his head with his hands. He knew if Ruthie got hold of the billy stick, she'd beat him to death, and the cop might let her do it.

"Nice to see you out, Ruthie." Jack said.

"Do I need to do anything?" She looked guilty. "Am I in trouble?"

"I know where to find you. And you're not in any trouble for beating up scum like these two."

Mrs. Kopachek looked at Ruthie in amazement. She was up. She was dressed and cooking dinner! "Ruthie, are you alright?"

"I'm fine, and I'm sorry." Ruthie walked over and hugged the woman that she would always consider her mother in law. "Sit down, I hope you're hungry."

"The neighbors said two thugs attacked a woman this afternoon, but she beat them up."

"I enjoyed it too." Ruthie said, realizing that she had. She bet those two fools wouldn't have dared to attack Capt. West. That woman had more courage in her little finger than Ruthie did in her entire body.

"You!" Mrs. Kopachek sank into the chair. Then, "Oh, Ruthie! You didn't charge this, did you?"

"It's ok." Ruthie squeezed her hand. "I'm sorry I let you down. We have money, and Eddie sent us some more." She handed Mrs. Kopachek Alex's letter, and poured her a cup of coffee. "I paid off the grocery bill, you don't have to worry anymore."

"Ruthie - Did those men hurt you? Weren't you scared?" Mrs. Kopachek looked at the huge plate of food in front of her. "My lord, you bought cake!"

Ruthie grinned at her. Ruthie grinned at her. She had thought that something had snapped in the girl's mind, and that she'd lost her too. She burst into tears.

A long time later, after they'd both had a good cry, when Ruthie had thought she didn't have any tears left, they ate their dinner, and made plans. Two days later, they were on a train.

Ruthie wondered if she'd lost her mind when she and Mrs. Kopachek stepped onto the train platform in the town? that Mrs. West had told her to get off in. The place consisted of the tiny train depot, a small café, an old fashioned general store with gas pumps outside, and a huge cavernous building with rolling doors that looked like it might have been a garage at one time. There were at least twenty pickups parked between the café and the store, and people everywhere. Surely all those folks hadn't come to see them!

An ancient grizzled man and a pretty woman who looked to be a little older than Ruthie were waiting on the platform, and the man nodded to them, plopped his hat back on his head, and said, "You'd be Miss Ruthie and Mrs. Kopachek then. I'm Frank. This is Kate."

Kate smiled and nodded to both of them, and Ruthie realized that she couldn't talk.

"It's very nice to meet you." Mrs. Kopachek said, as she looked around. "There are a lot of people here."

"You all go on over to the café with Kate. I'll get your bags in the truck, and be right over." Frank said. "The train was late. Everybody's waiting on their mail. It only comes once a week, and these days -" a sad look crossed his face," everybody waits."

"You go ahead." Ruthie said to the other ladies. "I'll help Frank."

"What in the world is this?" Frank asked Ruthie, as he struggled to swing the big sack of groceries in the back of the truck. He was used to hauling all manner of things for the Wild West show, and performing women who had trunks of costumes and cosmetics, but he thought this was a bit much for a short visit to a ranch.

"We were afraid you might not have any sugar." Ruthie said, flushing. "And Mrs. Kopachek wanted to be able to make pastries for you since you went to so much trouble."

"Pastries?" Frank's eyes positively twinkled, and Ruthie decided she liked him. She hadn't been so sure at first. "Is she married?"

"Her husband died suddenly about six months ago." Ruthie swallowed hard. "And then Eddie, her son, my fiance, was killed. We just needed to get away for awhile, and Capt. West was kind enough to invite us here."

Frank sighed, took the suitcase the Ruthie handed him. "Damn shame." He stowed the last of their belongings, offered her his arm, which Ruthie thought was sweet, and they started off across the parking lot. "Kate doesn't talk." He said suddenly. "She hasn't said a word since we got the telegram that said her husband was killed on Omaha Beach." He stopped, swiped at his eyes. "Alex's husband died there too. We lost twenty one men from the ranch on that damn beach."

Ruthie couldn't stop her horrified gasp. "I'm so sorry." She said, her eyes filling with tears.

Frank swiped at his eyes again, got hold of himself, and said, "Can you ride a horse?"

"I've never even touched a horse. But Capt. West said that if I could swat a cow with a broom, that you would find me something to do." Ruthie had thought it was a joke. Seeing the look that crossed his face, she realized it wasn't.

"I have some money." She said suddenly. Bill was the biggest con artist in the world. He and Bruno had taught her more about dishonest men than she ever wanted to know. These people were real. They were good people who needed help.

Frank shook his head at her. "We don't let on to Miss Alex how bad things are at the ranch. Just like she doesn't let on to us how bad the War's goin'"

"The War is going badly?" Ruthie stopped again. At this rate they were never going to make it to the café. She had no idea what had been happening since Eddie died.

"At this stage, yes."

"I'm sorry." Ruthie said again. "I haven't done anything since Eddie died. We had so many plans - we were going to live in Paris -" she stopped. She hadn't thought of anything but herself. If she had lost that many friends - "I'll do everything I can to help."

"Miss Candace just had her baby three months ago, and she shouldn't be doin' nothin' at all. She had a real hard time." Frank looked embarrassed. "Her husband was killed in a training exercise before D Day. Poor girl has that baby -" he let his voice trail off. "If you can take over Kate's chores, Kate can ride. We've had some trouble with rustlers." They had finally reached the café door. "I shouldn't have told you all that, I'm sorry."

Ruthie squeezed his hand. "I'll try my best to help and not get in the way. Mrs. Kopachek is a really good cook."

The café was packed, and Frank introduced her to everyone they passed as they headed for the rear table where Kate and Mrs. Kopachek were sitting with an older man.

"Sit." Ruthie said to Frank, and reaching to grab a bar stool from the counter for herself before he could protest. Kate gestured to him, and Mrs. Kopachek patted the bench seat, and he waited until Ruthie was on her stool before he did. The walk and the confessions thru the parking lot had cost him a lot.

The waitress brought a pot of tea for the ladies and coffee for the men, and Ruthie looked around at all the people, just waiting on their mail. She had felt more genuine caring from all of them than from anyone in Chicago. These people were different, somehow. She didn't know if she could fit in here, but she was going to try. And after the War was over, she and Mrs. Kopachek had talked about Florida. Someplace where it was warm, and never snowed. But what if they lost? What if that mad man Hitler took over the States? What would happen to her? What would happen to all the good people here?

A man stuck his head in the door and called, "Mail's up!" And waved the bundle in his hand before departing for his truck.

"Is all that his?" Ruthie asked.

"What with rationin' and all, we take turns comin' in." the older man said. "He'll stop and deliver to all his neighbors before he goes home."

"Oh." Ruthie said, looked at Frank. "We need to get going then, don't we?"

"I'm takin' care of that today." The older man said. "I'm John Smith, Miss Ruthie. I'm real sorry you lost your man. Both my boys were killed on Omaha Beach." He swiped at his eyes, and Kate put her hand over his and squeezed it.

"I'm so sorry." Ruthie said. My lord, how many boys had this community lost? She was going to start crying again. Frank swiped at his eyes, cleared his throat hard.

She noticed most of the people leaving, they were calling things out to the waitress and leaving money on tables.

"Martha, come and sit down with us." Frank said. "I'll help you pick up before we leave."

She poured herself a cup of coffee and sat down at the table opposite. "Well Frankie, I see you've added two more pretty women to your harem." She said, and winked at Ruthie. "Are you the pastry chef?"

"No ma'am. I just help."

"Well," Martha looked at Mrs. Kopachek. "Money is tight around here, but if you could make me about three dozen of those sticky buns I hear about, and get them here by noon on mail day, I think we could do a pretty good business. Just something to think about."

"You don't have to do that, Joan!" she called to a teenager, who along with what looked to be her younger sister, had started bussing tables.

"It's alright, Miss Martha." Joan shot a pointed look at the little girl. "Mama didn't want us in the line to get the mail."

"Oh god." Ruthie thought. "They have a brother over there." All these people were waiting, praying that nothing had happened to anyone else in their community. She had a feeling that if anybody else had been killed, everyone who was in town would come back in the café and try and console them and make plans to help them.

"Drink your tea, Ruthie." Mrs. Kopachek said. "And you might want to use the ladies room before we leave. Kate tells me it's two hours to the ranch."

At Ruthie's shocked look, both the men chuckled. "This is ranch country, honey." Frank said. "Nothing out here but cows and wide open spaces."

Ruthie had thought he was exaggerating. But it was almost two and a half hours before they pulled up in the ranch yard. She was so tired, she had nodded off with her head on Kate's shoulder a few times, and Kate had just patted her hand when she apologized.

The woman who opened the door looked to be about Mrs. Kopachek's age. She was wearing a ranch shirt, jeans, and boots, and she looked tired and sad. The ancient Indian woman behind her had a huge double barreled shotgun in her hands. Ruthie knew what it was because that's what the men who stuck up the liquor store had used, Bill and Bruno had told her. Something told her that that little old woman was very good with that gun. And a force to be reckoned with.

"Train was late. We waited on the mail." Frank said, by way of greeting. "I know these ladies are tired."

Introductions were exchanged. Mom West smiled at Ruthie. "Candace wanted to meet you, but the poor girl is exhausted. Jim couldn't stay awake either."

They all helped unload the truck, and Ruthie thought it was strange that Frank left it parked backed up against the porch steps. He went down the side stairs, called "Good Night" to them, and headed for a small building. After they'd all trooped back in the kitchen, the ancient Indian woman who'd been introduced only as "Mama" hooked a string of bells in front of the door.

"You'll have to unhook that if you want to go out." Mom West said, seeing Ruthie's curious look. "That's our back up alarm. The dogs are on the porch, but sometimes they're off chasing coyotes."

"What time is breakfast?" Mrs. Kopachek asked. "I would love to make some pastries for you, if that's alright?"

"I'm sure we'd love to eat them too." Mrs. West said, "We eat at five."

"In the morning?" Ruthie gulped.

Mrs. Kopachek chuckled. "Up at four then, I would imagine? Milk before, or after?"

Ruthie had no idea what they were talking about. She was clueless that her mother in law knew anything about a ranch. Kate held up four fingers, and nodded. My God, these people got up at four am?

"We found you some jeans and boots." Mrs. West said to Ruthie. "If none of them will fit, theres more trunks in the attic, and Alex has a whole closet full of boots. Kate will show you which ones you can wear."

"Oh." Ruthie thought as she followed Kate up the stairs, both of them toting suitcases. What had she been thinking? She didn't even own a pair of pants, and it was too far to go back to the store to buy anything.

She couldn't hold back the gasp when Kate opened the door to a huge bedroom. The walls were covered in rodeo and ranch pictures. One entire side of the room was a huge closet, packed to the rim full of women's clothes. Ruthie had been in stores that didn't have that much merchandise.

"This is Alex's room." Ruthie said. "I can't sleep in here!"

Kate nodded, and patted the bed. Ruthie had never seen a bed that big either. Alex's husband must have been a very large man.

"Is there -"

Kate pointed to a picture, and Ruthie put her bags down, and went and looked closely. The pretty young woman looked to be about her age and size. The man was older, and something about him - Ruthie didn't like the possessive arm he had around Alex. She knew she shouldn't make snap judgments about people, but she didn't think he had been a nice man.

"She's very pretty. And she must be brave. I never even thought of joining the WAC's."

Kate smiled at her again, gestured to the bathroom, and laughed when Ruthie said, "I have my own bathroom?"

Kate pointed to the bed, held up four fingers, and pointed to the neat pile of clothing on a chair. She gestured to the first two closets, and nodded, then pointed to the two farthest, and shook her head.

"Those are rodeo costumes?" Ruthie asked. They were beautiful and ornate, some of them had rhinestones that sparkled even in the dim light. Kate traced a finger around the room. "Oh, you mean it would be ok to try them on, just don't wear them outside?"

Kate nodded. "Wow." Ruthie thought. Talking to a woman who didn't speak was certainly easier than trying to have a conversation with her brothers.

Kate gestured, put her hands together and laid her head on them.

"Good night, Kate. And thank you." Impulsively, Ruthie hugged her. "I'll try to help you instead of getting in the way."

Kate smiled and nodded to her, pointed down the hall to her room, and left.

Ruthie brushed her teeth and washed her face, then hunted thru the clothes on the chair until she found a pair of jeans and a shirt she could wear. The jeans were old and soft washed, and felt good. She'd never had a pair of pants before.

She was so tired. She'd just lay down for a few minutes and then she needed to put on her pajamas. She snapped awake when Kate turned on the bedroom light. It could not be time to get up already. Then she realized that she'd slept thru the night, well what these farm people considered a night, and she hadn't done that since Eddie died.

She pulled on the boots they'd given her, followed Kate down to the kitchen where Mama, Mrs. West, and Mrs. Kopachek were already working.

"Did you sleep well, Ruthie?" Mrs. West asked "Yes ma'am, thank you." Ruthie said, nodding to Mrs. Kopachek and Mama.

Mama said something in whatever language she spoke, and Kate grinned as she handed Ruthie an empty bucket and herded her out the door. Kate had a bucket full of warm soapy water and Ruthie had no idea what they were going to do.

The lights in the barn were already on, and Frank, another older man, and a pretty young woman were feeding the horses.

"I'm Candace, and this is Jim. Sorry we couldn't stay awake last night." The brunette said, as she walked by with a scoop of feed. One of the horses kicked the wall and pinned its ears back, and she picked up a whip before she opened the door. "Back up and be nice." She scolded, and the big animal obediently backed away from her and waited politely while she dumped the food. She scratched the horse on the neck before closing the door. Ruthie knew that she would never even have gone in the stall.

Kate gestured and Ruthie followed her to the other end of the barn, where a large brown cow was tethered. A small brown and white calf was in the next stall, mooing impatiently.

"You're going to milk a cow?" Ruthie asked incredulously. She was going to watch a woman milk a cow. At four in the morning. Then she remembered what Frank had said, "You can take over some of Kate's chores." They thought she could milk that thing?

Kate showed her how to wash the cow, then she got two stools and told Ruthie to sit opposite her. She showed Ruthie how to grip the teat and slide her hand down, pointed to the front one on Ruthie's side, and started milking.

"I don't milk the rear?" Ruthie asked, wondering how in the world she was going to get any milk out of the front.

"That's for the calf." Candace said, as she dropped an armful of hay into the cow's manger from the loft.

"Oh." Ruthie said. Kate was going to town and milk was pinging into the bucket. She had only gotten out a few drops. She squeezed and pulled and nothing happened.

"You won't hurt her." Candace said, laughing. "Grip a little harder."

"I'm a city girl." Ruthie said ruefully. "I don't know if I can do this."

"You'll learn, or we won't have any milk." Candace said cheerfully.

Kate made a noise that sounded like scolding, and Candace laughed. "We'll help you 'til you figure it out. Brown's a good cow, she won't hurt you."

"What's the calf's name?"

"Dinner."

"You're going to eat it?"

"It's a bull. That's what happens to most of them." Candace went on about her chores, and Ruthie listened to the steady ping, ping, ping as Kate milked into the bucket. She had only gotten a few squirts out, and her hand hurt. She switched hands, and slowly got into a rythm, and the cow turned an inquiring head and looked at her, like, "Idiot! It's about time!"

Kate finished on her side, gestured for Ruthie to stop, and leaned over and rapidly finished milking Ruthie's quarter. She pulled the bucket out from under the cow, grabbed her stool, and stood up in one fluid motion. After setting the bucket outside the stall and covering it, she handed Ruthie a can of ointment, and showed her how to smear it on the cows teats.

"It won't hurt the calf?" Ruthie asked, and was relieved when Kate shook her head. After that was done, Kate opened the side door between the stalls, and the calf bounded in, nearly running over Ruthie to get to his breakfast.

Ruthie backed out of the stall and pushed the door closed, and Kate untied the cow and patted her. She effortlessly picked up the full milk bucket, showed Ruthie where to hang the two stools on the wall, and Ruthie carried the empty bucket and wash rags back to the house.

Candace and the men were stomping off their boots in the mudroom, and they all backed out of the way for Kate as she carried the milk into the kitchen.

"Go ahead, Miss Ruthie." Jim told her. "You need to watch Miss Kate so you know what to do tomorrow." They all laughed at the horrified look on her face.

"My God! They expect me to milk that cow by myself tomorrow!" Ruthie thought to herself. She wasn't even sure that she could pick up the full bucket of milk.

She followed Kate into the kitchen, where Mama had jars lined up at the sink. The first one had cheesecloth rubber banded over the top.

"You strain the milk to get any dirt out." Mrs. Kopachek said. "There probably isn't any, most farm cows are a lot cleaner than what you get from the dairy. And I'm sure if there's an accident, that just goes straight to the chickens."

Mrs. West laughed at Ruthie's confused look. "Sometimes Brown poops in the milk. Cows aren't known for being the world's cleanest creatures."

Kate poured the first jar full, Mama picked it up, and sat another jar in the sink for her, wrapped the cheesecloth around the top, and she wiped the first jar clean and put a top on it while Kate filled the second. The bucket was still three quarters full, and Kate gestured to Ruthie to come and finish.

Ruthie blanched, but she took the bucket. It was heavy. Some of the milk sloshed down the sides of the jar as she tried to pour.

"Slow down, honey." Mrs. Kopachek said. "We'll all help you until you get the hang of it."

Candace shot a meaningful look at the men that they didn't see, and Ruthie understood what she meant. She was not to ask them for help. The women all helped each other. Frank and Jim were old. They would hurt themselves trying to do chores they had no business doing. And when Frank had taken her arm to guide her across the parking lot in town, she'd realized he was a gentleman of the old school. Bill would never have done anything like that. And she didn't think Eddie would have either. It just wouldn't have occurred to him.

An Indian man in long white braids stepped thru the back door, and Ruthie froze. There was nothing menacing about him, she couldn't say why he terrified her. He just did.

Mama said something to him. Ruthie figured she was going to have to learn to speak whatever language the old woman did, because everyone else on the ranch did.

"I eat little white girls for breakfast." The man said, and grinned at Ruthie. "And you don't even have this one cooked yet."

She laughed in spite of herself. "I'm sorry. You just startled me."

"I'm Tall Feather." He said, by way of introduction. "And you'd be Miss Ruthie, I reckon. I'm real sorry you lost your man, Alex thought a lot of him."

Ruthie had a feeling that the only reason that she and Mrs. Kopachek were even there was because Alex had thought so highly of Eddie. She resolved then and there that she would learn to milk the cow if it killed her.

Mrs. Kopachek sniffed and dabbed at her eyes, and Mrs. West patted her arm, and they all sat down to breakfast at the huge old table.

"I made you some oatmeal." Mrs. Kopachek said to Ruthie, when she saw the girl looking questioningly at the grits.

"I'll eat what everybody else does." Ruthie said, watching Candace and then Kate pile huge amounts of the strange substance on their plates, as they all passed food around. Candace plopped what looked to be half a pound of butter in hers, and Kate did too. Ruthie took several small spoonfulls, figuring she could make herself choke that down if they were awful.

There was more food on the girls plates than she normally ate in an entire day. Candace was feeding a baby, she needed that much food. But how in the world did Kate eat all that?

Ruthie ate her oatmeal, since no one else seemed interested in it, tasted the grits, which surprised her, by being good, drank two cups of coffee, and finished up with a bacon biscuit. She was stuffed. She didn't see how she was going to be able to walk. Dawn was just breaking, and lord knows what these people thought she was going to do today.

Candace and Kate both finished all the food on their plates and ate one of Mrs. Kopachek's enormous pastries each.

"Had a letter from Pete. It was so late yesterday, we didn't think to look at the mail." Mrs. West said, and all chatter at the table stopped. "He's at Walter Reed."

"Did he write?" Candace asked.

Mrs. West shook her head. "One of the hospital volunteers did." She pulled the letter from her apron pocket. "The lady added on to the letter. He seems to have some crazy idea that we won't want him back since he lost his arm. Evidently she's seen a lot of that. Some families can't -" she stopped, wiped at her eyes. "Well, I'm going to tell that idiot boy to get his ass back here, we need him. I figured I'd try and call about eleven. So come in for second breakfast early."

"Nothing from Miss Alex?" Jim asked, and sighed when Mrs. West shook her head.

The thought that anyone would turn their back on a wounded soldier made Ruthie want to scream. She would have loved to have Eddie at home no matter how damaged he was. And from the looks on Kate and Candace's faces, she knew they felt the same way about their men. And then she realized what else Mrs. West had said. Second breakfast? How many times a day did these people eat?

Mama said something, and from the grins that Ruthie got, she figured it was about her.

"Mama said that you should just stay with Kate today and learn to look after the chickens. She'll teach you how to make butter and cheese after you get settled in." Candace supplied.

"I can do that." Mrs. Kopachek said. At their surprised looks, "Well, it's been awhile, but I think I remember. Maybe Mama can just give me some pointers and I can teach Ruthie later."

"I'll try and find time to give you a riding lesson today." Tall Feather said to Ruthie, and she looked at him in confusion. "We've got ponies that need riding. They're too small for me." He went on.

"Thank you." Ruthie said. She was going to ride a pony the same day she tried to milk a cow! This was definitely a day for firsts.

When everyone stood up and started clearing the table, Ruthie wasn't sure what to do. "I'll be glad to wash the dishes." She said. As many of them as there were, she didn't think she'd be done by time for second breakfast.

"Us old ladies handle kitchen chores." Mrs. West said with a wink at Mrs. Kopachek. "You young'uns do all the outside heavy work."

Ruthie followed Kate and watched her pick up a big wicker basket from the back porch. Candace was adding dry dog food to the breakfast leftovers, and Ruthie froze when she saw the three dogs on the side porch. One of them was as big as a pony.

"They don't bite women." Candace said, laughing.

"How do they know the difference?" Ruthie asked, and Kate joined in the laughter.

Ruthie looked in terror at the flock of hens waiting at the chicken run door. Those things had beaks and huge claws. They looked menacing. Kate gave her a bucket of food, and gestured her inside. Ruthie sighed. She couldn't very well tell Kate that she was afraid of those birds, could she?

The minute she stepped in the chicken run, it was game on. The birds mobbed her, tangled in her feet, and she went down with a thud. They were all over her. Not a single one of them pecked her, and she was amazed that they didn't claw her as they ran over her. Laughing, Kate pulled her to her feet, threw some of the grain at the far end of the run, and the hens went after it. She gestured to Ruthie how to pitch the feed on the ground. Once they'd emptied the bucket, she showed Ruthie how to gather eggs.

Ruthie just picked up every egg she saw, and Kate shook her head at her, pulled one out of the basket. It didn't look any different to Ruthie than the rest of them. Kate tapped it gently against the side of the coop, and it didn't break, laughed at Ruthie's expression.

"It's not real?" Ruthie asked, puzzled.

Kate mimicked eating with her hand, and Ruthie asked, "They eat their own eggs?"

Kate nodded.

"So you give them a fake one, and they can't peck it?"

Kate nodded again, laughed at the expression on Ruthie's face.

"Well I can't tell them apart either. I must be as dumb as they are."

Kate gave Ruthie the basket of eggs and gestured she was to take it to the house and come back. Mrs. West was waiting on the porch and she handed Ruthie a plate of food that looked like it was an omelet.

"It's for the cat." She explained to Ruthie. "Kate will show you where to feed her. We used to just leave the eggs on the porch, but the dogs figured out how to open the screen door, and they'll eat all of them. We have to feed the cat separate too."

Kate had hung up the feed bucket, and she had a wheelbarrow with shovels and a rake in it ready. She took the plate from Ruthie and effortlessly climbed up the ladder into the loft, gesturing to Ruthie to come up too. Ruthie had never climbed a ladder in her life. She sighed, and followed Kate up into the loft, where she was petting a mama cat and admiring her kittens. Kate left Ruthie playing with the kittens and she went down the ladder and came back with a bucket of water.

They cleaned the chicken coop thoroughly and Ruthie was surprised to see Mrs. Kopachek and Mrs. West both working in the garden when she went to the compost pile. Her mother in law actually seemed to know what she was doing. "Well," Ruthie decided, "I will learn. If it kills me. These people need help and this is important."

Kate showed her how to clean the stalls in the barn, pointed to a somewhat ugly red horse. Ruthie had been looking at a very pretty brown and white pony and hoped that he was the one Tall Feather had said she could ride. She carefully reached out a hand to him, and Kate yanked her backwards just as he lunged at her with his teeth. Kate hit him with her fist.

"Dog meat." Tall Feather said. At Ruthie's surprised look, he went on, "He's a pretty show pony, but he's mean as hell. He'll hurt you. Nobody around here can afford to buy him and we've got too much invested in him to just shoot him. Stay away from him and Sandy." At her confused look, "He's Alex's stallion, outside." He pointed. "Sandy most likely wouldn't hurt you but he misses Alex something awful and we don't need to risk it."

"Okay." Ruthie said quietly.

Kate went on about cleaning stalls, and Tall Feather pulled some equipment from pegs on the walls.

"I need to finish my chores before I get to ride a pony." Ruthie said.

"This pony needs some exercise. I don't really like lunging him, and he's bored to death and needs something to do. And the chores never get finished, it's just something you get used to."

He showed her how to halter the pony and gave her the lead rope. Ruthie had not thought the animal was very big until she was standing next to him.

"Red won't hurt you. He's ugly but he's a good solid pony. I'd ride him myself but he's too small."

Ruthie watched Tall Feather saddle the pony, realized that she was never going to be able to do it by herself. The more he talked, the more confused she got. He showed her how to get on, and suddenly, she didn't want to. Red gave her a gentle nudge with his nose like he was asking her to please try. She sighed, and dragged herself none to gracefully in the saddle. Well, she'd never be making those flowing mounts that she saw in the westerns that Eddie had liked.

She listened to Tall Feather's instructions as he led her around the corral with her holding on to the saddle horn with both hands. She reached and patted Red's neck with one hand carefully. This was fun! The look on Tall Feather's face stopped her, and then she realized it was approval.

He showed her how to hold the reins and steer Red, and she listened carefully. "This is a hackamore." He said, pointing to the leather contraption on the pony's head. "I don't let green riders ruin good horse's mouths. Once you learn, I'll switch you over to a regular bit. Red will work just fine with either one, and he won't hurt you."

"I'll just keep this, if it's ok." Ruthie said. "I don't want to risk hurting his mouth."

That got her another look of approval, and then for thirty minutes, she walked the pony around the corral and did what Tall Feather told her to, even having him step up on some blocks that he said they'd used in the show.

"Time we get him put up it'll be time for second breakfast." Tall Feather said. "I think you're probably going to be sore anyway."

Ruthie felt like it was five pm. It wasn't eleven yet and she had already done more work than she had in her entire life. She groomed the pony under Tall Feather's instructions and even managed to clean out his front feet. He tried to sit on her when she struggled to pick up a hind foot, and that earned him a swat and some hard words from Tall Feather, who took the hoof pick and cleaned the feet himself. He led the pony outside to the corner of the barn, gave Ruthie the lead rope, and showed her how to hose him off and scrape him down with a sweat scraper. She turned him into the horse paddock and watched him lie down and roll.

"He'll be a mess to groom tomorrow." Tall Feather said, laughing at her.

Everyone was in the front room gathered around the phone, and Ruthie could hear Mrs. West apparently scolding the person on the other end. Candace took the phone next and she told Pete in no uncertain terms that they needed help, to stop feeling sorry for himself. She told him to talk to Kate, and Kate took the phone and listened, then gave it to Mama. Mama rattled on and on, until Tall Feather, laughing, took the phone away from her. Ruthie wondered what in the world she had said. Tall Feather gave the phone to Frank who said, "Well we have one of Miss Alex's really pretty friends visiting. She lost her man over there. Maybe you can talk to her and help her out a little bit. We sure do miss you."

Jim was last and he listened more than he talked. He hung up the phone and said, "The Doctor said it would be at least two more weeks. He said Pete refused an artificial arm." He sighed, swiped at his eyes. "I put that boy on his first pony. I guess I can teach him how to ride again?"

"He can still ride." Candace said. "I'll get his horse in and start working him everyday."

"No, honey, you won't." Mrs. West said firmly.

"I can work him on the ground for a week first."

Kate poked Candace and gave her a look that Ruthie didn't understand.

"Ok." Candace said, "Kate and I will work him on the ground for a week and then she will get on him."

"With me there the whole time." Tall Feather said. "We can't afford for anybody to get hurt. If he's not too rank, Ruthie can practice grooming him."

Mama pointed toward the kitchen, started another long dialogue and Ruthie heard the word "banana".

"Hot dawg." Jim said. " We ain't had a puddin' since Miss Alex left."

It was a somber group of people that trooped into the kitchen to eat. Ruthie drank her tea, looked tiredly at all the food on the table. She just wanted to go back to bed.

"Ruthie, do you need to go lie down for a little while?" Mrs. West asked.

Ruthie blinked herself awake. She had fallen asleep with her head propped on her elbow. Someone had put grits, hash browns, biscuits, and a slice of ham on her plate. "No ma'am. I'm sorry, I'm not used to getting up so early." She dove into the food, was surprised when she realized that she'd finished all of it.

She watched the men all make several bacon biscuits that they folded into their napkins and tucked into their pockets. Kate gestured for her to do the same thing, so Ruthie did.

"Candace, get your gun and I'll move Domino so you girls can clean his stall." Tall Feather said. He gave Frank and Jim some instructions about a tractor that Ruthie didn't understand.

"I'll help with Domino." Frank said.

"That's alright, Frank." Candace said, coming downstairs wearing a gunbelt and revolver. "Believe me, I won't mind shooting the son of a bitch."

"Ruthie, you stay in the house until they get him moved." Mrs. West said, pushing back her chair. "We could just turn him out in the pasture."

"We'd never catch him and he'd tear up the other horses." Candace reminded her.

"Maybe we should just shoot him." Mrs. West sighed.

"The big tractors not running and I'm not burying anybody today." Tall Feather said. "Ruthie, Kate will wave and tell you when it's ok to come in the barn."

"Yes sir." Ruthie said, and she started clearing the table as the men and Candace and Kate went outside. She chopped up some leftover ham into the grits that Mama handed her, and waited on the porch until Kate signaled "All Clear." Then she went to feed the cat again.

"Candace, maybe tomorrow you can find Ruthie a gun and start teaching her how to shoot." Tall Feather said, as she came down the ladder.

"I don't need to -" Ruthie stopped at the looks on their faces. Evidently she was going to learn to shoot too.

'We have wild dogs and snakes here." Candace said. "And wolves."

"And sometimes men that need to be shot." Tall Feather said. "If anyone other than John Smith comes on this ranch, you go straight to the house. Understood?"

"Yes sir." Ruthie wondered what was going on. And then she remembered that Frank had said they'd had trouble with rustlers. She'd wondered why they had left the pick up parked in front of the door. It was still there. And the big dogs. And the bells on the door. These people believed in taking precautions.

That night she barely kept her eyes open thru dinner. She offered to help clean up, but Mom Kopachek told her to go to bed. She had her bath and was asleep before 7:30 pm.

The next day, the routine was the same, except she rode Red a little earlier, and managed to groom him by herself. When she came in from turning him out in the paddock, Candace handed her a pair of moccasions. "Time to run." She said, grinning.

Ruthie looked at the knee high laced suede boots on the girl's feet, and Tall Feather came back in the barn wearing some too. "Okay." She said, dubiously. "How far?"

"A mile for me." Candace said, as they started off with Tall Feather setting the pace. "Two for Tall Feather, and Kate will do four."

"You're going to run a mile?" Ruthie panted. "You just had a baby."

"Three and a half months ago." Candace grinned at her. "Alex and I used to do six miles, six days a week. You have to be in top condition to perform."

Ruthie had thought these people were a little nuts. Now she was convinced they were insane. They did all those hard outdoor chores and they ran too?

"You can stop, Ruthie." Candace was barely panting when she slowed down to a jog. "Nobody expects you to do four miles the first day."

Tall Feather was well on his second lap down the driveway and Kate was only a little behind. The man had to be at least 70. If he could do 2 miles, Ruthie decided she would too. "I'm ok." She panted, as she ran on past Candace.

She finished the second mile, and went on past when Tall Feather told her she could stop. Halfway down the driveway, she had to slow to a jog, and then she ended up walking back. Kate patted her on the shoulder as she ran on by, not panting nearly as hard as Ruthie.

"Not bad for a city girl." Tall Feather said approvingly as she collapsed on a hay bale. "Are you cramping up?"

"A little." Ruthie admitted, rubbing her legs as she changed her moccasions back to boots.

"Two glasses of milk for dinner. No coffee." Tall Feather said.

"Ok." Ruthie said agreeably, thinking, "God, now they're going to tell me what to eat too?"

Her days fell into a routine that kept her exhausted but didn't give her time to grieve for Eddie. Her hands hurt so badly from trying to milk the cow that she wanted to scream. Candace and Kate both helped her with Brown, and Mom Kopachek helped her in the kitchen. She was getting better at milking, but didn't think she'd ever master pouring a full pail of milk into jars. Mama had given her some ointment to put on her hands at night and it helped. They ran three days a week and Tall Feather gave her riding lessons the other three. There were no days off, the animals still had to be fed and tended to whether it was Sunday or not.

Mom West and Tall Feather went to town to pick up Pete at the train station. Ruthie had wondered why it always seemed to be Frank and Kate who went to town. Candace had told her that it was too crowded for Tall Feather's tastes and he didn't go unless he had to. Mom West hadn't been to town since just after D Day, she couldn't handle hearing about any more losses in the community.

"They're back!" Candace squealed, which was totally unnecessary since the dogs were having a fit, all of them trying to jump on the young man. Mom West's scolding was having no effect at all. Pony simply stood on his hind legs and started slurping the boy's face with his tongue. Tall Feather yelled and the other two dogs backed off. Pony gave him a reproachful look and took his time about getting down.

Mama came barreling out of the kitchen and grabbed Pete and hugged him, yammering away all the while. Then Kate had her turn, and she hugged Pete and gently patted his face with her palm.

"I'm real sorry, Miss Kate." The boy said softly. And then he looked at Candace. "Oh, god, Candace, I'm so sorry. I came home and they didn't -" he burst into tears.

"You stop that right now." Candace said, crying herself. "We're a family and we love you." The three of them stood there with their arms around each other, all of them crying.

"Okay." Tall Feather said, clearing his throat. "We're burning daylight here. Pete, these ladies are Mrs. Kopachek and Miss Ruthie Kirby. They're friends of Alex's, and they've come to help out. We're kinda hoping they might want to stay. You speak to them, and then Jim will get you settled in the bunkhouse. The rest of us have got to get back to work."

Ruthie had a feeling that they would have all stayed on the porch and cried the rest of the afternoon if he hadn't taken charge. Mrs. Kopachek hugged Pete and told him that she was glad he'd gotten to come home.

"Hello, Pete." Ruthie said quietly, thinking, "My god, he's just a baby." And then he looked at her with ancient sad eyes, and her heart just melted. "You stop being silly about losing your arm." She said, reaching and hugging him. "I'm sure that you're a lot more help than I will ever be. Maybe you can teach me some things."

"I'll try, ma'am." Pete said awkwardly. He looked like he was going to collapse, and Tall Feather put him back in the truck and Jim drove it over to the bunkhouse.

Months passed. Every week that someone went to town and came home with no letters from Alex saw more tired lines appear in Mom West's face. Ruthie had gone into town once, and decided that it was too much hustle and bustle for her. She preferred staying home and tending to Brown and doing chores. Everyone had to take up the slack on mail day. Mrs. Kopachek's pastries were a big hit at the diner, and she was socking away a good bit for money.

Ruthie and Candace were in the barn doctoring one of the young horses. Candace had tied his leg up so he couldn't kick her while she cleaned the wound, and Ruthie was holding the rope taunt.

Kate came thru the barn door with a letter in her hand, and looked to Ruthie.

"Candace, I think you got some mail." Ruthie said quietly, so she wouldn't spook the horse.

"I'm almost done." Candace said, and patted the gelding before she signaled to Ruthie to let off on the rope. They put him in a stall before she wiped her hands off and took the letter from Kate.

"It's from Beck." She said, tearing the envelope open.

Ruthie had hoped the letter was from Alex, telling them something. She had no idea who Beck was. Another man from the ranch, she guessed.

Candace was skimming the letter, and she stopped, put her finger on it and said, "I saw Alex last week. She's lost too much weight and she looks tired, but she's the same old Alex. She said that they move her around so much her mail never catches up to her, she hasn't heard from y'all in months. She hopes you're getting her letters? -"

Candace stopped, looked at a stricken Kate, and took off for the house. Ruthie knew she had chores to do, but when Kate ran after Candace, she went too.

"This is from Beck!" Candace said excitedly, thrusting the letter into Mom West's hand. The other ladies were sitting at the table sorting thru the mail. There were bills and farm catalogs, but no anxiously awaited letters from overseas. Everything always stopped for a few minutes when the mail arrived. The older men came in with worried faces and watched their ladies, and then went back to work when there was no news at all.

"She's ok. I was so scared -" Mom West said, putting her hand over her mouth, and then bursting into tears. Mrs. Kopachek patted her on the shoulder and talked softly to her, took the letter and handed it to Frank, who cleared his throat and started reading.

"Hello, all,

Candace, I sent this to you because I realize that Mom West may not want to hear from me because I went off and left you in a lurch. I wasn't thinking of anything but myself, and I'm sorry for that. I think all the women just panicked when we got that telegram. I just knew that Randy was dead and I had to do something.

When I got to Normandy, I put flowers on his and Rickey's graves. Tell Kate I put some on Bobby's too. I wish I could send you some pictures. If I knew where Jinglebob's grave was, I would put some on his. You must have had your baby by now, I hope you're doing well.

I saw Alex last week. She's lost too much weight and she looks tired, but she's the same old Alex. She said that they move her around so much her mail never catches up to her, she hasn't heard from y'all in months. She hopes you're getting her letters? We were both at the hospital, she was playing poker with some of the wounded while she was waiting on her convoy to leave. I spend most of my off duty time over there writing letters or reading to the guys. I'm bored to tears most of the time.

I didn't realize how homesick I was until I got back over here. I love the ranch, but it just has too many memories of Randy. I like what I do, I may stay in the Army after the War, if they'll have me. If that doesn't work out, I think I still have some circus connections. I walked a fifty foot wire on a bet a couple weeks ago, I can still do it. I hope everyone at the ranch is well. I do miss y'all. But I don't think I'll come back.

Love to all,

Beck"

"I'm sorry." Mom West said, clearing her throat. "I'm just so afraid. I don't know what we'll do if she doesn't come home –" she stopped, covered up her mouth again.

Mama said something, and Ruthie vowed that she was going to make Candace teach her to speak Apache. She'd picked up a few words on her own, but who was she kidding? French had kicked her butt. Well, she was never going to Paris now, she probably should throw her French books in the burning barrel. She glanced at Candace, and the look on the girl's face stopped her question. Something was seriously wrong.

"I need to check on Bobbie." Candace said, and left. Kate went after her, and Ruthie hesitated, She wanted to help too, but thought she might be interfering. She got up and checked the dinner cooking on the stove for something to do, looked at Frank questioningly. She didn't know if she should go back outside and finish up her chores, watch the dinner to keep it from burning since everyone else was distracted, or what.

Jim had taken the letter from Frank, and he looked up. "Beck wrote this a month ago. That's pretty good time, considering it had to come thru the censors. She and Alex are tough, they'll be ok." He chuckled. "I wish I could have seen the look on those fools faces when Beck walked that wire." He laughed again. "Okay, Frank, me, you, and Ruthie got to get back to the barn and finish up. I'm ready for some of that good dinner I smell cooking."

Ruthie hugged him when they reached the inside of the barn. "Will you teach me to speak Apache?" she asked.

"I don't know as some of the things that Mama says are fit for a little sprite like you." Frank said.

"Candace hears them."

"Candace is a ranch girl. She grew up here. We'll think on it." Jim said, giving her a wink.

"Ruthie, can you shut the gate for me?" Pete called.

"Sure." Ruthie said, walking out to the corral behind him. "What are you doing?"

"I'm gonna move him into the chute so we can load him into the trailer." Pete said, pointing at the large animal in the big corral.

"Shouldn't you wait for Tall Feather?"

"I can do it, no sweat." Pete said, as he eased himself into the saddle.

"Ok." Ruthie said doubtfully, wondering why in the world she had lugged the big heavy push broom outside with her. The barn aisle was sprinkled and swept three times a day. The West Ranch had always been known for their meticulous animal care.

Pete started easing the animal toward the far end of the corral, and Ruthie thought everything was fine. Until the cow spun around and charged Pete's horse, who half reared, trying to get out of the way as the animal plowed into his side. Pete fell, and hit the ground with a thud. The cow was pawing the ground, snorting. Pete wasn't moving. Baldy, shaking, planted himself in front of his rider.

Ruthie vaulted over the railing and rammed the bristles of the broom in the huge beast's nose. Those things hurt, she'd stuck one under her fingernails trying to pull some dirt out of the broom. Yelling, she whacked him again, seeing drops of blood coming out of his nose. When he turned, she hit him in the haunches, screaming at the top of her lungs. The beast headed for the squeeze chute, and she slammed the gate shut behind him, then ran back to Pete.

Mama was running from the house with the shotgun, faster than Ruthie thought was possible. Candace was only a few steps behind her, wearing her gunbelt with the twin colts and carrying another kind of long gun.

"Shit!" Candace said, sliding thru the corral bars, propping her rifle against the railing. "Ruthie! Ruthie -" words seemed to fail her, and she looked around at Mama, who was shaking her head.

"Pete?" she and Ruthie carefully rolled him over, noting his bloody face, and him gasping for breath.

"My fault." He finally managed. "Is Ruthie ok?"

"Are you ok?" Ruthie asked, helping Candace sit him up.

"Baldy!" he said frantically, trying to get up, but Candace pushed him back down.

"Sit there." She said, going to the still shaking horse, and starting to run her hands all over him.

"Oh god." Pete said. "Ruthie, that was a BULL!"

"So? He still ran when I whacked him." Ruthie said, completely misunderstanding.

Mama muttered something under her breath, picked up Candace's long gun along with hers, and stomped back to the house.

"Can you get up, Pete?" Candace asked, still checking out the horse.

Ruthie helped him to his feet. "I'm ok." He managed to choke out, a few tears sliding down his face.

"You KNOW better." Candace turned back to him, furious. "You could have gotten the three of you killed. You know we need the money from selling that bull. What if I'd had to shoot him on top of all of you getting hurt? Go to the house, NOW, before I hit you."

"I'm sorry." Pete said, tears flowing now.

"Well think first next time. Ruthie doesn't know any better, we'll excuse her. Baldy's got some hurt ribs, I don't know if they're broken. Get up to the house."

Ruthie helped Pete climb thru the corral rails, then she opened the gate for Candace to lead the horse through. "Will Baldy be alright?" she asked worriedly. He, like Red, was a good gentle horse, that she liked.

"I'll have Tall Feather look at him." Candace said. "We just need to get him in a stall for now with some really heavy bedding and give him some hay."

"I can do that, if you need to get back to the baby." Ruthie offered, reaching for the reins.

"Believe me, I don't want to hear what Mama is telling Pete." Candace said. "And we probably need to hide when Tall Feather and Mom West get back with the trailer."

Ruthie had been told earlier in confidence, that the big stock trailer was stored in an extra building on John Smith's ranch to give them an added reason to go check on him frequently, since he lived alone.

"I don't understand." Ruthie said, as she watched Candace unsaddle the horse. When she reached for a brush, Candace stopped her.

"Let's just leave him alone until Tall Feather can look at him." She said, dropping his reins and leaving him ground tied in the aisle.

Ruthie helped her dump two wheelbarrows full of sawdust in the stall and dropped some fresh hay into the manger. Baldy ate a few bites, and then just lay down.

"He's hurt." Ruthie said.

"Bruised ribs can be as bad as broken ones." Candace said sympathetically.

"You won't have to shoot him, will you?"

Candace shook her head. "He's a good horse. He's earned a retirement if it comes to that. I think he's just really sore and will have to stay in for a couple weeks."

Tall Feather parked the truck and took one look at Candace before saying. "I told you to stay away from that damn bull until I got back."

"I put him in there." Ruthie offered.

Mom West looked at her in complete horror. "Oh my God." She said, and Tall Feather reached over and took her arm.

"She probably saved Pete's life." Candace said. "Baldy's hurt. Tall Feather, you need to look at him. I think Mama is fileting another couple of inches off of Pete."

Tall Feather seemed to be gritting his teeth, but he headed into the barn and Ruthie and Candace went with him. Mom West went into the house and then the yelling started.

"She's not going to make him leave, is she?" Ruthie whispered to Candace. "I still don't understand."

Baldy hadn't gotten up when they opened the stall door and Tall Feather was carefully running his hands down his sides. "Ruthie, I told you to stay away from Domino and Sandy. I forgot you're a city girl. DO NOT go near a bull. ANY BULL. ANYTIME."

"How do I know the difference?" Ruthie asked innocently.

Candace put her hand over her mouth and started laughing.

Tall Feather shook his head and muttered something in Apache and Candace laughed until tears rolled down her face. "Is Baldy alright?" she asked, sobering.

"Broken ribs. He'll be on stall rest until spring. We've got plenty of other horses we can use." He shook his head and said something to Candace in Apache again.

"No fair." Ruthie said. "I'm sorry, I still don't know what I did wrong."

"I think Mom West is going to explain it to you." Candace said, grinning.

"I need to check on Frank and Jim. Can you two stay out of trouble the rest of the day?" Tall Feather asked. As he passed by Ruthie he stopped. "Did you use Baldy to push that bull in the chute?"

"I hit him with the broom."

Tall Feather put his hand over his face, shook his head tiredly, then reached and squeezed Ruthie's shoulder. "Thank god you didn't get hurt."

"I need a sandwich." Candace said. "Do you want something to eat, Ruthie?"

Since it had been two hours at the most since they had eaten, Ruthie shook her head, and went back to her chores. She was headed for the compost heap with the wheelbarrow when she saw Mama, Mom West, Kate, and Candace headed toward her. Candace had half a sandwich and a big glass of milk in her hand, and she was laughing.

"Ruthie, it has been pointed out to me that your education has been neglected." Mom West said.

Mama said something under her breath, and Mom West reached back and swatted her. Kate was grinning and Candace had only stopped laughing long enough to take another bite of her sandwich.

"Let's go look at the bull." Mom West said.

Mama cocked the shotgun that Ruthie had noticed she was carrying, and they all trooped over to the squeeze chute.

"Bulls have nuts." Mom West said. "Look under his tail, see? You need to stay away from anything with nuts."

Mama said something and they all burst out laughing.

"Especially men." Candace translated for Ruthie, grinning. And then she started laughing again.

"But I don't go around looking under cows tails." Ruthie said.

"Look at his body. He doesn't look like a cow. His head is huge and he's more muscled up." Candace offered.

"Maybe to you." Ruthie said.

"Ruthie, just stay away from ALL the cows except Brown and Dinner. Unless we tell you otherwise." Mom West said. Then she shook her head and started laughing.

Ruthie didn't know how it gotten to be the second week of October. The first hint of fall was in the air, she'd just taken off her jacket when she got overheated cleaning Brown's stall. Kate was cleaning horse stalls on the other side of the barn, and she'd gone to dump her wheelbarrow.

Running feet made Ruthie back out of the stall with the pistol she always carried now in her hand. "What's wrong Kate?" she asked. The woman had her own gun and was a far better shot than Ruthie would ever be. She wouldn't have come back in the barn unless she needed help. Her eyes were wide and frightened, and she gestured to the sky, grabbing the kittens out of the alley where they were playing and thrusting them in Ruthie's arms, and pointing to the house.

"You want me to take the kittens to the house?" Ruthie asked, confused.

"Kate, help me run Sandy in!" Candace yelled, as she skidded into the barn. "Ruthie, take the kittens to the house. Mama will show you where to put them. Close the chickens up and get Brown back in. HURRY!"

Ruthie headed for the house, struggling with her armful of kittens. The sky had turned pitch black and the wind had picked up. It felt like the temperature had dropped fifteen degrees. Mrs. Kopachek grabbed two kittens from Ruthie and dropped them in her deep apron pockets, holding unto another one as they hurried into the kitchen.

"What's wrong? Are we going to have a tornado?' Ruthie asked.

"Honey, it's going to storm bad. We've got to get the animals in and the house battened down." Mrs. Kopachek placed the kittens in a deep wooden box and put two serving trays across the top of it to keep them from climbing out. Ruthie helped her slide it under the table.

She heard one of the tractors start up, and wondered what Mom West and Mama were doing.

"They're getting wood." Mrs. Kopachek said, as if reading her mind. "I'll close up the chickens, and get started in the garden. You get the cow in and try and find the dogs. Then just do what Kate and Candace tell you."

Candace was galloping Sandy toward the barn, and Kate was running next to her, trying to drag Pony, the big dog, who was fighting her every step of the way. Ruthie grabbed a halter off the wall and jammed it on his head, taking up the slack with her hand. When he growled at her, she hit him with her fist, and he looked embarrassed. With her pulling and Kate pushing, they got him locked in one of the box stalls.

"I'm getting Brown." Ruthie said as she headed for the cow pasture. Huge snowflakes were already starting to drift down. She saw Mom West coming back from the woodlot with a bucketful of wood, Mama scurrying next to the tractor.

Brown was waiting for her at the gate, and was anxious to get back in.

"Just put her in with Dinner, I doubt you're going to milk tonight." Candace said. "Get all these stall doors open and start filling up water buckets. If the rest of the dogs show up, lock them up in the feed room. And stop and take the mama cat to the house if she comes back. Kate and I are gonna run the horses in."

"All of them?" Ruthie asked, as she closed Brown's stall door.

"All of them." Candace climbed down from the hayloft where she'd been pitching hay to Sandy.

"We don't have enough -"

"We'll figure something out." Candace said, swinging up on Red bareback. Kate was already on her horse Ginger, and they loped out of the barn. Ruthie wondered if she'd ever be able to ride like that, and decided probably not.

She started turning over buckets and beating the dust out of them, and then filling them. The ground was completely covered now. Mom West and Mama went by with another tractor load of wood, and Mom Kopachek was doing something out in the garden.

She had one row of buckets filled and was starting back up the other side when she heard them coming. Kate jumped off Ginger, popped her on the rump, and she obediently trotted into her stall. She grabbed a long whip and directed traffic. Ruthie was amazed that most of the horses stopped and waited until "their" stall door was opened for them, with only a minimum of fuss. Two of the old Belgians waited outside patiently.

Ruthie guessed there was three inches of snow on the ground when Candace pushed the last of the horses into the barn. Kate clapped hands at the two old horses and they trotted into the barn aisle, and Kate swung the heavy doors shut. Ruthie ran to help her.

Candace roped off a section of the barn for the big Belgians and Kate and Ruthie wrestled a water trough over for them and filled it. Ruthie went back to filling buckets and Kate and Candace started dropping hay.

"Ruthie, fill up those two extra troughs." Candace called down. "It's really hard to get water when the power goes out."

"I hear a truck!" Ruthie yelled at her.

"It's probably John. Cut the water off and go help him! Kate and I will finish in here."

Ruthie struggled to John's truck. It was already over the tops of her boots. She had never seen snow come down like that.

"Where are your men?" John asked, then saw the look on her face. "Tall Feather will find them some shelter somewhere. They'll be ok." He climbed out of the truck carrying a goat. "Can you carry one of the kids?"

Ruthie grabbed one of the goat kids out of the cab, amazed at all John had crammed in it. Two goat kids, the mama goat, his old dog and cat, and it looked like all the groceries out of his house.

Kate tied Pony in the aisle and they put the goats in the only empty stall there was.

"John, just drive to the house." Candace called down. "We'll help you carry your things in as soon as we're done in here."

They heard the tractor go by again. "I better help with the wood." John said. "Ruthie, bring that infernal dog, and you can start unloading my truck."

"What do I do with him?" Ruthie asked John as she stomped the snow off her boots on the porch.

John just picked up one end of the huge heavy kitchen table and showed her how to hook Pony's lead around the leg. "He'll stay."

Ruthie followed John back outside and he handed her his old cat and she carried her inside while he brought his dog.

"Just put her in with the kittens." He said. "She won't hurt them and they'll all keep each other warm."

Mama and Mom West were back with another load of wood, and John put all of the women to unloading his truck while he took over the tractor. He brought back Mrs. Kopachek and the box of green tomatoes she'd been picking in the bucket, and helped her up on the porch, carrying the produce inside.

The girls had his truck unloaded and they'd all started carrying wood in the house. John made two more runs with the tractor, then he turned it around and parked it next to his truck. Kate and Candace helped him tie a tarp over it. Then they all carried all the wood they could stack in the house and Mama went back to her stove.

She asked John if he wanted a cup of coffee. Ruthie realized that she'd understood what the ancient woman said.

And she knew she was right when John replied in English, "I'd really like some tea if you don't mind. I don't think I've had any since Edna died."

Mom Kopachek was wrapping green tomatoes in newspaper, and Ruthie didn't have a clue why, but as soon as she'd taken off her wet jacket, she sat down next to her and started helping.

"We can have ripe tomatoes at Christmas this way."

Ruthie nodded, and looked outside at the swirling snow. Mama produced some broth and they fed the kittens and John's animals. Pony got a huge bone to keep him occupied.

"Let's pray." John said, seeing all the women's frightened faces. They all linked hands and Ruthie realized how scared all of them were, though they were trying not to show it.

"What are you feeding me for dinner?" John asked, trying to lighten the mood. "Slide some of those tomatoes over here and I'll help you." He told Ruthie.

"You shouldn't have brought so many groceries, John." Mom West said. "We'd never have gotten all the wood in the house if you hadn't helped." She bit her lip. "It's never snowed this early as long as I can remember."

"Thank you." John said to Mama when she sat his tea down in front of him. "Why don't you sit down for awhile?"

The look Mama shot at him had all of them laughing.

"Yes ma'am." John said quickly. Then he looked at Mom West. "Storm caught me off guard too. My cows are in the hollow, I took them some hay. Put the horses in the barn and I'll just hope for the best." He sighed.

Pony got up and whined and Kate went out on the porch to see what he heard.

"Is it them?" Candace asked, jumping up too.

Kate came back in the house with the half frozen mama cat. Mama produced a warm towel off the stove to wrap her in and they let her see that her kittens were ok before Kate started vigorously rubbing her to try and warm her up. They fed her a little bit of broth, wrapped her in another dry towel, and she went to sleep in Kate's lap.

Once all the tomatoes were wrapped, John carried them down to the root cellar. Ruthie couldn't believe how cold it had gotten in the house, even with the big cook stove going. Mama brought baby Bobbie's bassinet out of her room where she usually stayed during the day, and Pony whined until they let him prop his head on the side so he could watch the baby.

Ruthie thought she heard something different outside, looked at Kate questioningly, and was shocked when the woman jumped up and ran into the parlor and turned on all the lights. "Come on, Ruthie, hurry!" Candace called, as she darted upstairs. "Turn on every light in the house! DAMN! I should have done it as soon as we came in!"

Ruthie skidded back downstairs, Candace just slid down the banister, which she didn't have the nerve to do. John and Kate and Mom West were out on the porch and Candace grabbed for her coat, but Mama said something sharply to her, and she thrust it at Ruthie. "Will you please help?" she asked, looking like she was going to cry as she picked up the baby. Pony was making noises deep in his throat and trying to drag the table toward the door, and Candace caught hold of his collar and pulled him to her.

The snow was so thick that Ruthie could barely see. The headlights of the big tractor were a dull glow. John was up to his waist in snow, and he wrenched the cab door open, hauling out Pete and handing him to the women. It took the three of them to wrestle him into the kitchen, he was half frozen and shaking. John carried Jim inside right behind them, and they just laid the men on the floor in front of the stove. The women carried Frank inside and John supported Tall Feather. Then he went back out to shut off the tractor.

Mama, Mom Kopachek, and Mom West were peeling the men out of their ice encrusted clothes, and Ruthie was sent into the parlor to sit with Candace and the baby and Pony. Candace had started a fire in the stove, and she pulled down a photo album for Ruthie to look at.

"I don't understand why I couldn't help." Ruthie said.

"It would embarrass the men to no end if you saw them naked." Candace said, giving her a wink.

"Kate stayed."

"Kate's an old married lady with two kids -" Candace looked horrified at what she had just said, and Ruthie hurriedly opened the photo album. Now was not the time to ask what had happened to Kate's kids.

"Will you tell me who the people are?" she asked, scooting over closer on the couch to Candace. She pointed to a picture of two good looking cowboys, with an older lady who looked a good deal like them, "Are they twins?"

"John's boys." Candace whispered. "And their mama, Edna."

"They died at Omaha." Ruthie whispered back.

Candace nodded. "Randy's on the left. He and Beck were inseparable. I mean, I loved Bobby, but you couldn't pry the two of them apart with a crow bar. She was a high wire artist, she was really good, and she quit to come back to the States with us. Her parents pretty much disowned her. I wonder if they're still alive?"

Ruthie flipped the page, saw a photo of Edna standing on two running horses, one foot on each one. She looked at Candace, horrified.

"It's called roman riding." Candace said, and she looked sad. "Edna was great. She taught me and Alex, heck she taught most of the women on the ranch. There was nothing she couldn't do on a horse."

"You do that?" Ruthie asked in amazement, and Candace took the album from her and flipped thru a couple pages before handing it back to her and pointing out a photo of her standing astride two horses and jumping thru a huge flaming hoop. There was another woman roman riding racing toward her, but she couldn't tell who it was.

"Alex." Candace said. "We were billed as The Cossacks."

"Will you start the show up again when the War is over?"

"Probably not." Candace sighed, and Ruthie realized that she would very much like to. "I have Bobbie to think of now, and I don't want her growing up with no parents like I did." At Ruthie's questioning look, "My folks were killed in a car crash when I was six. The Wests raised me."

"Did you ever think you would marry Bill?" Ruthie asked, before she thought about it. Then she looked horrified, "I'm sorry, I shouldn't have asked that."

Candace was laughing though. She leaned closer. "Bill was a horrid man. I don't know how two people as good as the Wests could have been his parents. Mom lost four babies before they had him, and I guess they just spoiled him too much."

"But Alex loved him?"

"Alex ran away from home and joined the show. And when her Dad came looking for her and tried to make her go home, Pop West stopped him. Her Dad isn't as tough as he thinks he is without the Army behind him. We knew he'd come back with the law though. Not because he loved Alex or anything. Just because he's a jackass. Mom had been after Bill to get married and settle down for a good while, and they loved Alex. She was just a kid, and I guess Bill thought he would marry her to shut up his Mom. And they didn't want to lose half of their star attraction, we brought in a good bit of money." Candace sighed. "Alex hates her Dad, and she sure didn't want to go home. She didn't really marry Bill, it was more like she married Mom West and the ranch -"

"You girls can come back in now, it's a little warmer in here." Mom Kopachek said. "I think they'll all be alright, they just got too cold. We've got Pete and Frank and Jim tucked in Mama's bed."

Candace carried Bobbie and Ruthie brought Pony, who took her straight to Tall Feather and laid down across the man's feet. "I'm sorry." Ruthie said, noting the exhaustion on his face "Are you sure you're ok?"

He reached down and rubbed Pony's head and she saw he was still shaking. Candace handed the baby to Kate and she hugged him. "You should be in bed too." She scolded. "Do you need some help with your tea?"

"I'll be alright." He said, smiling at both of them. "Didn't know if we were going to make it back." He said to John.

"And we'd never have gotten you in the house if John hadn't been here." Mom West said, and Alex saw the raw fear that was still in her face.

"What was it, '26, when we had eleven inches on the first of October?" John asked, trying to change the subject a little. "The boys were toddlers and Edna had them, and I think six calves in the kitchen." He smiled, and Mama came and patted him on the shoulder. "And you came and cooked and looked after all of us." John squeezed her hand.

"Let's try my first cheese and see if it's edible." Mom Kopachek said, sitting a wheel and some crackers on the table, offering the first slice to Tall Feather.

"That's really good, Gracie." Tall Feather said. "I told you you wouldn't forget how."

Mama put bowls of beef stew in front of everyone, and finally sat down herself when Mom West shot a pointed look at her. John gave the blessing, and they all started eating. After dinner, Ruthie and Kate helped John carry more firewood in from the porch. Mama shook her huge serving spoon at Tall Feather when he tried to get up, and he sat back down.

The other women cleaned the kitchen and Mama set bread dough to rise. Then John pushed the table over to the side of the room and they made beds in the floor. Baby Bobbie was cushioned between Candace and Pony, who crawled right under the covers like he slept there every night of his life.

Ruthie got up the next morning when Candace did, re-starting the fire in the parlor stove while Candace fed the baby. She couldn't believe how cold it was in the parlor. The kitchen stove was blazing, and it usually heated up the whole first floor.

"It's still snowing." Candace whispered.

"How are we going to feed the animals?" Ruthie asked worriedly.

"We'll go thru the root cellar, we don't have to go out." Candace whispered back. She put Bobbie back in her bassinet in the kitchen, and caught Pony's collar. They put all their heavy outside clothes on and Ruthie soon found out how exhausting winter chores were. It took over two hours just to get the livestock watered.

John chopped ice from the troughs with a sledge hammer, and they had to tie the Belgians up to keep them from getting hit as he swung. As soon as he had the ice cleared and Kate had poured two steaming kettles of hot water in, they let them drink their fill.

Candace explained to Ruthie that many horses wouldn't drink when it was so cold, so they warmed up the water a little bit to entice them. And that horses had to have plenty of water to keep their digestive systems going or they would colic and die.

Ruthie busted ice out of water buckets until her hands were numb. The hydrant in the barn was frozen and they couldn't get any water out of it, so they dumped all the ice in an extra trough and carried hot water from the kitchen. Mom West thrust a cup of hot cocoa in Ruthie's hands and told her to sit down and drink it, and when Kate and Candace came in, she made them sit down too. John carried the last of the kettles in and they all took a break and tried to get warm.

"A lot of people leave in the winter." Mom West said sadly, looking at Ruthie.

"I don't want to leave." Ruthie said. "I just want it to quit snowing. It's miserable when it snows in Chicago too."

Tall Feather bundled up to go back out with them, ignoring the scolding he got from Mama, and the disapproving looks he got from Mom West. He had helped keep the kettle rotation going on their first trip out. He and John could both carry a kettle in each hand, the girls could just manage one.

Ruthie heard the dogs barking when they entered the barn, and looked at Candace. "Where are they?"

"In with the manure spreader." Candace said. "Thank god they made it back!"

Ruthie had seen the piece of heavy equipment that was parked on a lower level of the barn, but she had no idea what it was. John grumbled under his breath, but he climbed down in the pit and handed the happy dogs up to Tall Feather and the girls. Ruthie hugged both of them, she had been afraid they would freeze to death. They put them in the feed room and Candace made them a bed out of old horse rugs. She and Kate checked their paws for frostbite and Ruthie carried them some food from the house.

"Why don't they come in too?" she asked Tall Feather.

"Pony is Alex's dog. He's always come in." He shrugged, "We need one better set of ears in the house for defense. They'll be fine out here now that they've had some food."

"What about the cows?"

"We can't get to them, honey. It's a bad part of ranching." Seeing the distress on her face, he squeezed her shoulder. "We'll get out as soon as we can."

Jim was sitting at the table peeling potatoes when they went back in, and grinned at all the hugging and fussing he got from the girls. "I'm ok." He said. "I'm just too damn old to be good for much. I couldn't stand Frank's snoring anymore." Since they could all hear him thru Mama's closed door, that caused a round of laughter.

"Are Frank and Pete ok?" Ruthie asked Mama, figuring that somebody would translate for her when the old woman answered, but Mama just nodded and looked worried.

They took turns all day long going out and busting ice and hauling water. Kate and Candace milked Brown together, since they were faster than Ruthie, and they gave the warm milk to the dogs, since it was still far too cold for Brown to be washed and milked properly.

Ruthie checked on the goat kids, tucked in with their mama. She knew even less about goats than she did about cows. Kate looked at the kids, looked at Candace hard, and looked at the mama goat, then pointed to the house.

"We should keep them. They're the last of Edna's herd." Candace said thoughtfully. "I'll ask Mom Kopachek if she can make goat cheese."

"Can't you make cheese?" Ruthie asked, and was shocked when Kate giggled.

"Honey, I can't boil water. I am not allowed in the kitchen." She shook her head when Kate laughed. "Well Alex can't make cheese either."

"But she cooks?" Ruthie asked.

"More like she bakes. She can make the best bread you ever tasted in your life. She used to say that I got beauty and brains and she could make bread."

"But she's very pretty!" Ruthie protested.

"I'll have to find a picture of her sister for you. Then you'll understand why Alex thinks she's plain."

Pete was putting kindling in the stove when they all trooped back inside, but Frank still hadn't gotten up. Ruthie looked at the closed bedroom door worriedly. She could hear Mama fussing inside.

"Thank you, Pete." Mom Kopachek said. "And thank you,Jim, for peeling all those potatoes. I'd never have gotten them all done."

The next morning, Ruthie realized it had stopped snowing. Tall Feather and John left the feeding and busting ice to Pete and the girls, and went to work on the big tractor. When they heard it turn over from inside the barn, Candace said, "Thank you, God."

Awhile later, Ruthie heard another tractor running, and Kate and Candace stopped busting ice and starting grooming and harnessing a team. The two old Belgians in the aisle both whickered and Pete patted them. "Too hard for you old guys." He said. "I know how you feel." under his breath, but Ruthie heard him.

"Clear the door!" they heard Tall Feather yell, and a few minutes later, the heavy outside doors swung open, pulled by one of the tractors. The snow was blinding. Ruthie could not believe the drifts, some of them were over her head.

"Ruthie, I'm sorry, you and Pete will have to finish the chores." Tall Feather said.

"That's ok." Ruthie said, wondering why everyone looked so grim.

Kate walked up the path that the tractors had cleared to the house after she had pointed the chicken coop out to Ruthie. "Wait 'til they leave." Pete said, when she went to get feed. "I don't know how many dead birds we've got, and Kate really loves her chickens."

"Oh." Ruthie said, suddenly realizing why everyone looked so tense and worried. The tractors and the team headed for the hay barn, and she and Pete went to help load. Mom West, Kate, and Mama walked from the house, loaded down with guns. Mama had a steaming thermos in her hand too.

Kate held the lines while Candace struggled to buckle her gun belt over her heavy coat, then Kate climbed inside the smaller tractor cab with John. Mom West got in the big tractor with Tall Feather and they set off. Mama went back in the kitchen to her stove.

Pete helped Ruthie carry food and water for the chickens They had to pour three kettles of hot water on the coop door to get it thawed. Ruthie could hear cackling inside so she knew that not all the birds were dead.

The gunshot made her jump and she looked at Pete, scared. Then more shots, six total. "That's not too bad." He said after a few minutes, when there weren't anymore."

"I don't understand." Ruthie said.

"That was six cows they had to shoot. Plus we don't know how many froze to death."

"Oh." Ruthie said, horrified. Then she saw the dead chickens. "Did they freeze?"

"Yeah." Pete reached down and caught the two birds by their feet. "I'll ask Mama if she wants to cook them for the dogs. Don't say anything to Kate, she'll be upset enough over the cows."

Ruthie choked back her tears. She was really attached to the silly little birds too. She started gathering eggs after she had poured the chicken feed in the inside feeder.

"Those will probably have to be tossed too. I'll ask Mama." Pete said, squeezing her shoulder. "I'm sorry."

Ruthie nodded. "Me too."

Pete came back with the dead birds in his hand, he'd tied their feet together with a piece of hay string and was holding them upside down. "Mama said she didn't have time to cook them, and she said to toss the eggs too. Come on Ruthie, we'll do something fun while we get rid of all this." He picked up the metal bucket she'd put the eggs in, and dropped the chickens in the top.

When they walked back into the barn, he haltered Bob and Ben, the two old Belgians, and Ruthie thought he was going to hitch them up. But he tied two lead ropes together to use as reins, and gestured to her she was to get on.

"Bareback?"

"We don't have saddles big enough for them. They need some exercise, we'll walk slow so they don't fall."

Ruthie climbed up on the side of the wall and managed to get herself on Bob's big broad back. Her legs felt like they stuck straight out. But Bob was furry and warm and very comfortable. She patted his neck. Pete gave her the bucket to hold and he finally managed to get on Ben, then took the bucket from her.

"Why can't we just throw that in the burning barrel?" Ruthie asked him.

"Never get a fire to start. Can't have dead birds around the barn, it'll draw predators."

"Oh." Ruthie said, feeling like an idiot, and wondering how in the world Pete was staying on Ben. He had the bucket in his only hand and was guiding the horse with his knees. "Do you think I'll ever be able to ride as good as you?"

"I'm not that good a rider." He looked back at her and grinned. "Now Miss Alex and Kate and Candace, they can ride anything. I always swore that Sandy would try and stand on his head if Alex asked him to."

"What happened to Kate's kids? Are they dead?"

"Her in laws came and took them." Pete looked disgusted. "They said she was unfit since she quit talking. Candace would have run them off with a shotgun but she was so sick with her baby she couldn't get out of bed. They must have been watching the ranch, because they waited until Tall Feather and Mama went up to Oklahoma to see his new grand baby. The two of them never go anywhere. Frank and Jim were both out doing tractor work. They would have stopped them too. Mom West –" he stopped, sighed. "Before we all shipped out, she ran this ranch. Her and Alex. Bill thought he did, but he was a fool. Something happened to her when all the men got killed. She didn't stop talking like Kate did, but there's something wrong with her."

"Kate can't get them back?"

"I guarantee you when Miss Alex gets home, they'll be back."

They had reached the end of the driveway, and he leaned over and handed the bucket to Ruthie, before sliding off of Ben. "No, you stay on." He said, when he saw she was going to dismount too. "Hold Ben for me."

"Pete, those drifts are over your head!"

"That's okay, I know where to walk." And in a few minutes he came back with the empty bucket. He had carried the carcasses far enough from the road that Kate wouldn't see them when they came back.

"How are you going to get back on?"

"I'll walk."

"Then I'll walk too." Ruthie said.

She was shocked when he grabbed her foot. "Stay on Ben. I didn't bring a gun and if we see any wolves you can just go back to the house."

"Do you want my pistol?" At the look of surprise on his face, "Tall Feather told me I was not to go out of the house without it. I know you're a better shot than me."

"No you keep it. I'm glad you brought it."

When they got back in the barn, Pete tied the Belgians and showed Ruthie how to use a shovel to pick up the frozen manure. She helped him clean their area of the barn, then they put them back in. He had her walk the dogs one at a time while he cleaned more stalls, then they started busting ice again. He managed to get the pump thawed so they didn't have to carry as much water.

"Should I go ahead and milk Brown?"

"Wait and see how many calves they bring back."

"I don't understand."

"They'll bring back any calves that won't make it unless they get some help. Brown will have to feed the worst ones, and we've got milk replacer for the others." He grinned at her, "We'll have to bottle feed them."

Ruthie was amazed when Pete declared the chores done, and told her they would take Red and Ginger out for some exercise, then they had to start carrying wood in the kitchen. When they got to the end of the driveway, they saw the sled coming with Kate riding in the back with some calves.

"Now we're gonna have some fun." Pete said.

Ruthie decided that Pete's idea of fun was highly overrated. He tied Dinner in the aisle, tied Brown in her normal milking corner, then tied one of her hind legs up, and Ruthie and Kate did everything they could to convince half frozen calves that they wanted some milk. Pete and Candace went to unhook the sled and put the horses away.

Ruthie thought she had milk everywhere except where it should have gone, in the calves. Kate was too exhausted to laugh, and even Candace looked strained. Finally the calves had all the milk they would take and Kate gestured to Ruthie she was to pick one of them up. She ducked down, put her calf over her shoulders and started walking to the house.

Ruthie tried and tried and she could not get the calf to cooperate. Candace finally came and picked him right up. "It's alright." She told Ruthie, "I'm used to it."

Jim and Mama had partitioned off a corner of the kitchen for the calves. An ancient looking Frank was sitting at the table nursing a cup of coffee. He looked terrible. Ruthie hugged him.

"Glad to see you're up." Candace said, looking at him worriedly. "Where's Jim?"

" Taking a nap. I should have helped you." He didn't look like he could stand up.

"They should be back soon." Mom Kopachek said. "Why don't all of you sit down and get warm?"

"I didn't realize that all the animals came in." Ruthie said, laughing. They had turned the wooden box on its side, and the kittens were exploring everywhere with their mama keeping an eye on them. Pony had hopped over the partition and was washing one of the calves. John's old dog and cat were watching everything with interest.

"We had a yearling in here one year." Frank said. "Damn thing was supposed to be the replacement bull. He was dumb as a stump. Fell in the pond and I thought he was gonna be froze solid before we got him drug out."

Mama said something, shaking her head and all Ruthie understood was "stove".

"He kept trying to lick the stove." Candace laughed. "He was the dumbest bull we've ever had but he was never mean."

They heard the tractors coming back. Candace went to feed the baby and the rest of them bundled up and went back out. Tall Feather drove the tractor right up to the porch and Pete and Kate helped Mom West out. The woman looked done in, and Kate walked her inside.

"It's always hard when we have to shoot cattle." Pete said, as he and Ruthie walked behind the tractor. "I'll go out tomorrow so she doesn't have to."

"Are you sure you're ok?" Ruthie looked at him worriedly.

"I just got too cold. I'm alright." He looked at her approvingly. "You did really good today."

The sun came out the next day and melted the snow, and then Ruthie found out what a joy it was to try and work in mud that sucked the boots clean off your feet. The tractors couldn't navigate the mud, so they had to use teams to feed the cattle. The entire schedule changed, it took all day just to get the animals fed and watered.

"Would you go to town with me tomorrow, Ruthie?" Candace asked, leaning into the stall while she was milking Brown.

"It's not mail day." Ruthie said, wondering why in the world she wanted to go to town. Nobody here goofed off at all.

"The county seat. The big town." the shadows were back in Candace's eyes, and Ruthie suddenly wondered if she was sick. "Well, it's probably not a big town to you."

"Don't you want Kate to go?"

Candace shook her head. "Ranch rules, I can't go by myself." She sighed. "I'll ask Jim -"

"Oh, I'd love to go." Ruthie said, which was a complete lie. She'd be perfectly happy if she never set foot off the ranch again. "She'd be perfectly happy if she never in her life set foot off of this ranch again?" It was true, she realized. Milking Brown, and caring for Dinner, who was an outrageously spoiled little calf, whether he was destined for the table or not, had become her life. She took great pride in looking after them and the chickens and doing it well, and actually contributing something to the ranch, instead of just being in the way the way she had the first few weeks.

"OK, thanks." Candace said, "We'll leave right after you finish milking in the morning. Kate said she'd take up the slack for us."

"Ok." Ruthie said, still wondering what was going on. The only thing that she could think of was that Candace was sick and didn't want any of her real ranch family to know. But she hadn't started acting strangely until Mom West had asked what they would do if Alex didn't come home.

Real doctors cost money. Candace would get a pension from her husband, but Ruthie didn't know how much it was. Candace never went into town, and she really didn't need to buy anything. There was enough clothing in the attic to last all the women on the ranch the rest of their lives.

Ruthie had thought the two hour drive into the small town where they got their mail was bad The four hours it took to get into the "big" town was almost intolerable. The silence between her and Candace bothered her. She had no idea what was wrong, but knew the girl well enough to realize that it was something major. Candace parked the truck in front of the Courthouse, and Ruthie looked at her questioningly.

"I'll teach you how to drive on the way back." Candace said shakily.

"That's ok."

They climbed the stairs to the second floor, and Candace entered the Tax Office.

"Well hello, Candace. It's nice to see you. I heard you had a beautiful little girl." The older woman behind the counter said.

Candace just nodded to her. "I came to pay the taxes." She choked out. "I know I don't have enough, but I thought maybe you could let me make payments since we're at War?"

"Candace, honey, did you get a bill?"

Candace shook her head. "Alex cussed the entire month of October. I know they're due, and Mom West isn't very good with finances. I can't let Alex down -"

"We pro-rated the taxes and Alex paid them for five years in advance before she left." The woman looked at Candace worriedly. "Did she forget to tell you?'

Candace had no idea if Alex had told her or not. The ranch had been a flurry of activity as all the men departed to go to War. Bill had forbidden Alex to join up, which had sealed her desire to go right there. If only he had kept his stupid mouth shut, Alex would have stayed home, and then Jinglebob would have too, if she'd asked him. Candace choked back a sob.

"Candace, honey - You don't owe us any money. In fact, I think we may end up owing you a refund. Alex even made provisions if -" the woman stopped, swallowed hard herself. "But that's nonsense. She's the toughest woman I know. The Army doesn't let WAC's near combat areas."

"Thank you." Ruthie said, catching Candace's arm and guiding her outside. Candace would normally have introduced her to the lady and they would all have exchanged pleasantries, but she realized that Candace was really upset. And suddenly she understood. Candace was afraid that Alex wouldn't come home. Either she'd be killed or she'd decide to stay overseas as Beck had.

She pulled Candace into a café, ordered a pot of tea and some toast for them, and looked at her friend. "I was afraid that you were sick."

Candace sighed, wiped the tears from her face. "I should have known that she would look after everything. The ranch is my home. Bobbie and I have nowhere to go."

"I have a little bit of money if you need it." Ruthie offered.

"I thought you wanted to go to Paris." Candace said, dumping some sugar in her tea.

"With Eddie. I'll never get there now." Ruthie shrugged. "It doesn't matter."

"I didn't like it. Too many people. Stuff all crammed together."

"You've been to France?"

Candace actually laughed out loud. "You think I'm a yokel?"

"No! You're just so at home on the ranch. I thought you'd always been a cowgirl."

"I have. Pop West took the show to Europe for two years. It was hard and I got really homesick, but I met a lot of nice people. Too crowded for me though." She waved her hand at the outside window. "Too crowded here for me."

"Yeah." Ruthie agreed. "For me too."

"You'll get to Paris, Ruthie, if you really want to."

"Unless the Germans blow it to hell." Ruthie sighed. "What if we lose? What if they come here?"

"Why do you think Tall Feather drills us all so hard? We'll fight them on our ground."

"Well God help them if they tangle with Mama." Ruthie said, and they both laughed.

Kirby's Carol