Child

Summary: Chidori's last thoughts before she died. (Ayashi no Ceres) Angst.

Disclaimer: This is solely for self-entertainment. Ayashi no Ceres belongs to Watase Yuu and its respective owners.

Warm. So warm.

I thought as I clung to Yuhi's back like a lifesaver. For some reason, I didn't feel content. Why? After all, I've always been ready to die for Yuhi. Die. Two weeks ago, if you said I would be afraid of dying I would have scoffed at you. But now, I'm dreading it, and having second thoughts about my actions. I don't want to die so soon. I want to be with Yuhi forever and ever. I...want him to remember me.

'Yuhi-kun...when we get back...I want to eat lots of your food...'

'Sure. What do you want to eat?' Yuhi asked, his usually confident and strong voice cracking.

'Anything Yuhi likes.'

'Okay. Then I'll cook mackerel for you everyday.'

I smiled. But that didn't comfort me. For now, how can be sure where I stand in Yuhi's heart? Will he remember me after I die? I know for sure Aya will always be set on the highest pedestal. Well, at least she's alive. While I'm dying. Dying. The word sounded strange and foreign to me. I realize with dread, that when I took the bullet, I wasn't thinking of Yuhi. I was thinking of myself. I feared for my life. I didn't want to die. God, I'm so selfish. If Aya had been in my place, would she have died for him? I'm sure she would have. Even so, she would have been thinking of Yuhi's life. Me? I can sacrifice my life for him; yet I can't even do it properly? I smiled bitterly at the thought.

Next to Aya, I am insignificant. Yuhi would carry her memory with him for the rest of his life and nobody would remember about me. I felt a pang of immense hurt as I remembered Yuhi's words 'I don't like childish girls.' I was being bitter. I could care less. Right now, all I wanted to do was indulge in self-pity. You spoiled brat! You keep thinking of yourself, can't you think for others for once? I chided myself. For a split second, Ceres's image came to my mind. She was sophisticated, gorgeous and mature.

Would Yuhi have liked me better if I were more like Ceres?

'Yuhi-kun...are you glad I turned into the tennyo?'

'Huh? What do you mean by that?'

'You said you didn't like childish girls.'

'What are you talking about? You're fine just the way you are.'

My heart surged with happiness and content as I smiled. So, he likes me the way I am after all. All my past doubts were gone in the very moments he spoke those words. I suddenly didn't feel afraid of death anymore. At least, I would be in peace, knowing for eternity that Yuhi liked me just the way I was. At that point, I had a desperate urge to tell him my feelings. I didn't care if he rejected me or not. All that matters was that he likes me the way I am. My body grew colder as I realized death was coming for me soon. I needed to tell him now.

'Yuhi-kun...'

'Yes?'

'I've always wanted to tell you...' My voice grew faint. I had to finish this. Now.

'Chidori?'

'...that...' suddenly, I had no more strength to continue.

'That?...Chidori? Chidori!'

My eyelids suddenly felt heavy as I could still hear Yuhi's distant voice, begging me to come back. I felt like a heavy weight was being lifted off my shoulders. I smiled sadly at the fact I couldn't finish what I wanted to say even though his answer didn't matter.

I love you, Aogiri Yuhi.

OWARI

Author's notes: Something short and written on impulse. Hope you like it. Comments please.