Hey! I have been kinda obsessed with this fandom for a while, and this story came into my mind. Hope you like it.
When it's late at night, and his patrol is over, he finds himself going to her window. Sometimes he stares at it from the building across the street, or he sits on the fire escape, so close to the space she used to occupy and fill with that brilliant smile he fell in love with. He wishes so many things, but above all, that he could have saved Gwen.
She was everything. He loved her to the point where it hurt. And now, months later, his heart still hates having to beat without the companionship of hers. So, he sits on her fire escape, trying to remember every aspect of their relationship, every smile, every kiss, every word. He needs to remember everything about her, because, how else is he gonna survive? They became so intertwined that when she was ripped away (by Harry and himself), his wounds never quite healed.
When he stopped being Spider-Man, when he stopped saving people, it was hard, because he knew she wouldn't have wanted that for her Bugboy. But with her gone, it was like someone turned the lights out. Nothing seemed to hold meaning, nothing seemed to matter. What was the point to it all, he asked himself, without Gwen? But as soon as he heard her voice and that speech, he found that brightness she always brought in her wake.
He still visits her grave, more often than he should, but he wants to be close to her in any way possible. Whether that be at her grave or at her window.
When he sees the remainder of the Stacys walking through the city or buying something at a shop, he feels this guilt that tears him apart and nearly sends him to the bathroom, holding his mouth and stomach. He will always feel guilty, he realizes, after this had happened twice, because he killed her, with a little help from two psychotic villains. He, Peter Parker, destroyed the magnificence that was Gwen Stacy.
Now he sits on her fire escape, staring at her room, like it was a window into another, happier time. And it is, in a way. The Stacys have never cleaned it out, not even after all this time. As he stares at the bedroom, he's reminded of so many things. When he told her who he was and the kiss that ensued, when he came to her for medical help constantly throughout their relationship, and that night of mayhem and death that she got caught in the crosshairs of. He shakes his head vigorously at the memory. He is supposed to be remembering the wonderfulness of Gwen, not the thing that took her away.
When he thinks about the future, he still hits a brick wall as to what his will look like without her. He has gotten better since he began protecting the city again, but the pain of her loss is still achingly fresh, and comes to mind at the strangest of times.
So, he will be content with this little haven he still has, on her fire escape.