I had this idea for so long, I'm glad I finally wrote it down. Hope you enjoy it! :D
Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight.
This world keeps spinning faster
into a new disaster so I run to you
I run to you baby
and when it all starts coming undone
Baby you're the only one I run to
I run to you
Lady Antebellum- I run to you
It was that day.
It was her day.
She looked around herself and found even her room was neatly decorated with gold ornaments as was the garden and reception. She tried not to touch too much her hair or she would have Alice yelling at her, again. Moving with care as to not to trip-as was a very Bella thing to do- she could see herself in the full length mirror. Some would say she looked beautiful, others lovely. Edward for sure would be the definitely charmer with his perfect vocabulary.
You are strikingly gorgeous, my love. He would say looking at her with his golden eyes and crooked smile. That always made her swoon. It still does.
Bella smiled to the reflection staring back at her. She barely recognized herself. Not that she minded, because for once she felt good enough to stand next to the Cullen family and not seem just an outcast. The only thing she wanted to keep from the old Bella was her beat up truck, which sat at the Cullen's front yard.
"Baby," she heard her mother's voice crack and then saw Renee silently crying. "I will never get use to this." Then she went on wiping the tears carefully avoiding smearing her make-up.
"Mom," Bella couldn't stay emotionless any longer.
Mother and daughter embraced letting the tears flow freely holding tight onto one another. Renee cried for Bella, her baby, already leaving the nest. She had hoped for a couple more of years before she went down the aisle. Seeing the way the Cullen boy watched her daughter told her this was going to happen sooner rather than later, but she still hoped. When you move, he moves.Indeed it had been that way. Edward never left Bella out of his sight and that calmed Renee yet it worried her at the same time. She knew her daughter, Bella was more alike her mother than she thought. Dependence can be utterly romantic on the first months of marriage, but then it became a baggage which with Bella's nature didn't mix well. But she wished them well.
Bella did not know why she was crying. There was a terrible feeling of thread on her heart. A constricting pain. Crying was the only way to let it go, if just for mere seconds. She was getting married with the man who had stolen her heart two years ago and she couldn't be happier to finally have found someone who made her feel complete.
The problem was, she had found two men who made her feel wonderful.
She cried because soon, she would have to say good bye to so many people she couldn't even count. Its true- and everyone knew it- she wasn't technically a popular girl, but the few people she met had marked her in some way. No pun intended when it came to James. She would be losing her high school friends, and while Mike sometimes bored her to death and Jessica made her want to go deaf she would miss them. Angela, Ben even Lauren…
Her small broken family was going to be the hardest part.
Her parents would be destroyed when they received the news that she had mysteriously died, but it was for their own good. She liked to think that and simply forget about that arduous moment.
The pack she would miss, even if they hated her again, because she had found sort of a family within their bonfires, quarrels and well cooked dinners. Their heat was something she knew would remember and long for the rest of her cold life. She still preferred sunny places to live, although that wasn't an option anymore.
When it came to Jacob Black, she didn't know what to feel. There were so many things at once, she couldn't identify one single feeling and analyze it. One thing she knew… She loved him, Bella had told him. Not enough she had said afterwards.
So every other feeling of happiness she could feel because of her impending marriage was squashed when she thought of his brown warm eyes and cheerful smile. Not that she got to see them lately as their relationship had become tainted with angst and unnecessary pain. Unnecessary, because she could have stopped Jake from getting hurt, but felt powerless to push him out of her life before it was too late.
Someone once told her she couldn't get everything, and that was true. Bella hadn't really recognized it to be true until she saw herself dressing in white.
She knew Edward had sent Jake an invitation- to bring Billy too along Sue and Seth, although Charlie had already took care of that. Bella didn't know how to feel about that either. She wanted him to be there, for her because she was scared. What about? She didn't want him there because she didn't want to see his heart break in front of her once more. What could she do? It was her day, and she felt as if nothing was going her way.
Renee pushed her daughter away gently, afraid to see her wasting so many tears. They weren't from joy. Bella was scared and her mother could see it all in her eyes. Their tear-jerker reunion was cut short by someone knocking at the door.
"I knew you were going to ruin your make-up," Alice said scolding Bella playfully.
"Sorry, I had a moment there." She laughed it off and put on a happy face, like she had been doing all morning.
Renee saw Bella put a mask on, turning to her "original self". It saddened her that her daughter hadn't thought much of her episode. She touched Bella's cheek one last time and smiled knowingly. "I'll see you, my dear." Then left the room.
"Having cold feet?" It was meant to be playful but Bella felt someone had invaded her privacy although she knew no one could read her mind.
"You know I don't."
Ten minutes passed until the pixie like vampire had mended the bride's face. It gave Bella time to think, and that was far from what she wanted.
"How's Edward?" She couldn't help but feel anxious at the thought of him waiting for her and their happily ever after.
"To tell you the truth," Alice went on smothering her dress. "Oddly nervous. It's even funny." Her laugh rang like delicate bells.
"Can't believe he is nervous."
"It's a big day for him too." They looked at each other and smiled.
That lifted Bella's spirits. Edward wanted her as much as she did and nothing could compare to that. Taking a deep breath she shook her head lightly trying to get rid of the delusional thoughts she had been having all day. Alice squeezed her hands and kissed her cheek before saying:
"It's almost time." She grabbed the bouquet and gave it to Bella's trembling hands. "Charlie will be here in a- stop trembling silly."
"I can't help it." Bella laughed nervously. "What if I trip? I would embarrass myself, and all of you…God, what if I stutter or something like that… Alice what-"She rambled on.
"What if you get calm or should I call Jasper?" Her friend quirked and eyebrow, contemplating the option. Even she felt Bella's stress.
"Okay…deep breaths…There," She noticed her heart beat normally again. She still felt like she was caged inside the bride's room, but she was about to leave, and go down the aisle. That made her shudder, but it was normal to be nervous, right?
She knew what she had to do and felt strong enough to go with it.
"Bella," she heard the gruff voice of her father through the closed door. He came in on his tuxedo and glistening shoes. She could laugh at him and his awkwardness, but thought better because she had inherited it from him and probably was as awkward as him in that moment.
"You look beautiful honey." Alice wished her luck and maneuvered her petite frame out of the room and down the corridor.
"Thanks dad,"
She wanted to ask who was down there. She wanted to ask if HE was down there, but couldn't utter the words. Charlie didn't catch up on her slip up and she let it go. It was the rule with Jacob, she always let go.
"Are you ready?" That was a catchy question, one she couldn't really answer truthfully. He caught her arm and gave it a gentle squeeze.
"Yes." She managed to say.
Charlie almost grunted at that, till he felt it wasn't a total sincere response, but he saw himself backing down. Renee had turned back in tears and he did not want to upset her baby daughter in her wedding day. He wanted to ask her about Jake. As simple as that. He still thought of the boy who loved Bella like his life depended on it… And in some point he thought it really did.
He shut up instead. It was her decision and he was going to respect that, he didn't have to like it though.
They were in the Cullen house and the mass was going to be held in their big backyard, which had been totally reorganized and expanded for the event. As father and daughter were walking down the steps silently Bella could see the garden full of people- she knew many of them were vampires- and doubt consumed her. She was about to ask about her best friend and his whereabouts, but thought better. More than half of their guests had super hearing and she wasn't about to risk Edward or any other Cullen hear her asking for Jacob. On her wedding day. It would be disrespectful given the story they had.
Once they reached the back double door which led to the aisle she caught a glimpse of her soon to be husband at the end of the way. She felt jittery, and a warm feeling overflowed her. He was there, waiting for her.
Rosalie who was on a red dress putting everyone- Bella included- to shame nodded at her from the corner of the garden and made a sign to tell the musicians to start playing. As the music started, Bella couldn't help but give a little jump, startled at the sudden noise.
They went slow, almost dreading they would get near Edward too fast and everyone got time to appreciate and admire the bride.
She is radiant.
She looks beautiful.
She is going to be so happy.
Billy from his seat could see her nervous smile and hesitant steps. Although he had to be happy for his best friend daughter, he couldn't help but wish for a miracle. His son had looked so abashed when Billy was already on his black suit, it broke his heart.
Bella was on deep concentration trying not to trip as she didn't want to let go of Edward's stare. She removed her eyes from him and for a brief moment of insecurity she looked around frantically trying to recognize all their guests. Her heart was beating erratically on her chest and felt her dress oppressing her lungs, tightening around her.
Jacob was not there.
He looked at the water and then at the cliffs from where she had jumped and ended their relationship. To be exact, she had cut him out of her life after the newborn fight, but the day she decided to see Ed- the leech for the umpteenth time, had been the day he was condemned to lose her.
He wanted to punch a rock, something as hard as that bloodsucking disgusting animal, but he had broken lots of things along the days, and none had made him feel better. What would make him feel better? Have Bella near. Was that possible? Not anymore.
Jacob sat on the wet sand making odd drawings with his feet till the waves crashed onto him erasing his marks as if he had never been there. What an irony. He had fought like hell to keep Bella safe and sound, to fix her and make her see he was important in her life, but Edward- it burned his chest to think of his worst enemy- had come stronger than a wave and had erased every memory Bella hold of him. She replaced him easily and that had left a nasty wound which wouldn't heal any time soon. He just hoped some day he would forget.
Like a skittish child he didn't want to forget, and held to her memory even harder.
What was the point? He asked himself. He laughed humorlessly, there, all alone sitting on a deserted beach while she was getting married. Jacob felt a tear run down his cheek. Powerless to stop it he left it there, as another sign of his pain. Not that someone needed any more proof of his devastation. His presence was all that was needed.
When he received the dreadful envelope he was sad but had a small glint of hope that he could still change her mind. Once he read the invitation and the personal note the leech had left for him he burned with rage. He went to confront the disgusting parasite as a last chance to take Bella back, but couldn't. Jacob saw Bella talking about the wedding from the bushes and although the Cullen's knew he was there they turned deaf and blind. She was laughing, having a good time and then turned to her fiancé telling him how happy they were going to be once she was one of them.
It had ripped his non beating heart from his chest and smashed it against a hard surface. How could he take her from there, where she felt at home? He finally gave up and left.
He had disappeared for a few days and then returned for her wedding day. As he was helping Billy getting dressed he knew he couldn't see the love of his life say "I do" to other man. Jacob had told his father to apologize to Bella for him, but he was too scared to see her happy without him. So there he was watching sea gulls fly, and each time he saw clouds get far away from him he wondered how much time had gone by and if she was already a Cullen. It burned him to think of her as another's man, it was even worse to know she preferred to be dead than to be with him.
She had seen it all, their two boys and small house, they aging and loving each other but it hadn't mattered to her in the end. He had said to her that it did not change a thing between them but it had. Finally he accepted- or he thought he had- she didn't want him as Jacob expected to.
I love you, she had said to him. But it wasn't enough for her.
Walking down the aisle she didn't have eyes for anyone but Edward. His golden eyes were pulling her in and she wanted to consume in them. All in all Bella couldn't stop hearing the titillating noise her bracelet made.
She had refused to take it off. For what purpose, she didn't know.
The wolf and the diamond heart clinking against each other pulled her out of her daze, her heart leaving the Cullen's backyard for a moment.
"I know what he did to you… I'm always going to be here." Said Jacob, looking at her intently on the eyes. She found herself unable to look away, but she knew where would that led and she wasn't ready now. If ever.
Letting his warmth engulf her, Bella hugged him and buried her face in his still long hair. He cared about her and that was all that mattered.
Bella felt her steps falter and her muscles froze.
They were riding in Jake's old truck and she found herself freezing to death while her friend took her home, why had she jumped in her clothes to the freezing water?
"108 degrees over here." Closing her eyes she could feel his warmth soothing her and taking her pain away.
She was on autopilot now and she walked blindly to where the groom awaited. She was mesmerized at the fact that she hadn't fell over.
"But you are missing so much time with these bikes, you could be studying." She scolded him as she watched how the dusty bikes were repaired.
"Oh come on Bella… I do my homework, stop worrying." He dismissed her quickly and turned to his work.
"Billy would think I'm a bad influence."
He snorted, his boyish grin making her smile despite their argument. "You cannot influence me."
"Well I'm older, so that makes me the influence and you the influenced."
"Psht…"
Edward touched her arm and Charlie gave her to the other man who swore to protect her and respect her for the rest of their lives. She saw the big smile which had taken place on his face, and hers mirrored his.
"You look stunning my love." He whispered to her. She blushed and listened to the priest- Angela Weber's father- start the ceremony.
"We, who have gathered in this circle, are now privileged to witness and to participate in a ceremony celebrating the public acknowledgment of a love which Edward Cullen and Isabella Swan have for each other, knowing that by our presence here with them, we are saying that they, together, are loved by many others." The priest's solemn voice did nothing to calm Bella down. She saw it happening so fast now.
Bella admired Jake's sculpted chest while he wiped the blood from her face. "Did you know you're sort of beautiful?"She found herself asking, realizing her filter mouth-brain was dead gone.
"You hit your head pretty hard didn't you?"
"I'm serious." She rolled her eyes at him, but she could see her question had stirred something within him.
A small blush crept on Jacob's face, something that did not happen very often."Well thank you. Sort of."
"When you love someone, you do not love them all the time in exactly the same way, from moment to moment. That is impossible. It is even a disservice to pretend it is possible. Yet that is what most of us demand. We have such little faith in the ebb and flow of life and of love and of relationships." Bella's eyes widened at the priests words. It was as if he was describing her situation.
"We leap forward at the flow of the tide and resist in terror its ebb, for we are afraid it will never return. We insist on permanence, on duration, on continuity. But the only continuity possible in life, as in love, is in growth, in fluidity and in freedom, as dancers are free, barely touching as they pass, but partners in creating the same pattern."
She felt a stab of pain in her chest. She could see her loving Edward, but what she getting into a no ever changing relationship. And when it came down to freedom, Bella knew she would have to stick to her family-in-law for the rest of her life. But that's what she always wanted, right?
"Christ abundantly blesses this love. He has already consecrated you in baptism and now he enriches and strengthens you by a special sacrament so that you may assume the duties of marriage in mutual and lasting fidelity. And so, in the presence of your loved ones, I ask you to state your intentions."
She turned her body fully to the priest holding onto her bracelet for dear life. The images and memories of Jacob would not stop bombarding her, and she saw herself answering mechanically watching as the preacher's mouth moved and no sound came out.
"He is like a drug for you Bella." Jacob said desperate. "I'd had been healthier for you, like the air… the sun."
Her sun. She almost flinched at the memory. Jacob was her sun, the light that had illuminated the darkest corners of her soul, what she wanted and needed at the moment. She was giving that up now too. Shudders ran up and down her spine knowing there would be no one to warm her, the way Jake did.
"Edward and Isabella, have you come here freely and without reservation to give yourselves to each other in marriage?"
"Good Bye Jake."
"I'll be there, until your heart stops beating." Bella turned her back on him and closing the door she heard him whisper quietly. "And even then…"
It had been hard to tell him he had no chance at winning her heart. She knew she had left him feeling not good enough and that make her feel guilty as that was a filthy lie. He deserved so much more than what she could give.
"Yes we have." The couple answered at the same time. Everyone else was silent. You could hear birds chirping in the distance and the soft melody of the violins playing in the background.
"It feels… complete when you are here, Jacob… It's just not whole unless you are here." She had said those words to show him how important their friendship was to her.
Whole. That was a concept she barely understood nowadays.
Bella had tried so many times to make up for the feelings she could not reciprocate, but everything fell onto deaf ears, his best friend wanted her in ways she couldn't even imagine. Not at least until the newborn battle. Her heart skipped a beat. Just thinking about that kiss, made her long for the life she was turning her back to.
"Will you love and honor each other as man and wife for the rest of your lives?" Bella thought the man did not know the real depths of his words. The rest of their lives, meant forever.
"See anything you like?" Bella had asked playfully to Jacob on her graduating party.
"Yeah, but she's taken." He smiled his signature smile that made her swoon.
"Yes we do." They answered quietly as they were told to do. She could hear a hint of sarcasm flow through Edward's reply and she bit her bottom lip nervously. She wasn't going to be Bella Swan anymore, but a Cullen, a vampire. A dead cold vampire, with blood thirst- at least for a few months- frozen in time. Immortality and forever with Edward, she chanted in her head as if that could stop the voices in her head.
"I won't lose you Bella, not for this."
He had tried to change her mind countless times, always ending up in the same situation: an angry Jacob and Bella in tears. Is that what they relationship had come to?
"Will you accept children lovingly from God and bring them up according to the law of Christ and his Church?"
"I miss you everyday Bella. It's not the same without you."
Bella's eyed widened at the question. While she was kissing Jacob she had seen their future and their two little boys. Jake would have said yes in a heartbeat, yet she hesitated to lie in front of the Church minister so openly.
"…Yes we do." The couple said already knowing that wasn't an option.
Bella felt herself die a little inside, but she knew what she was getting into, and she had accepted everything that came with the bargain.
She couldn't come to terms as to why Edward wanted to get married. She was giving him forever! What else could he take? And what was the point when everything they were vowing to were shameless lies? Sighing she thought this was the least she could do for him. He was going to change her after all.
She was his everything, as Jacob would find soon his very reason to breathe.
"Jake there's a chance that you might imprint."
"But I'll never see anyone else, Bella. I only see you. Even when I close my eyes and try to see something else."
Imprinting, something she didn't have to fear with Edward. Bella didn't want to be the next Leah. That's why she felt her love wasn't enough to fight against such a heartbreaking threat. However, that was a cheap excuse so she didn't have to face her mixed feelings.
"Since it is your intention to enter into marriage, join your right hands, and declare your consent before God and his Church."
The couple joined hands and looked directly at each other. Somehow Bella couldn't hold his loving stare for more than few seconds. God knew how grateful she was that Edward couldn't read her mind. He was everything she could think about, but lately things had been changing.
"I'm in love with you, Bella. Bella, I love you and I want you to pick me instead of him."
She hadn't, and it was eating her away.
"Edward Cullen," They all heard the most important part of the wedding take place. "Do you take Isabella Swan for your lawful wife, to have and to hold, from this day forward, for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, until death do you part?"
"I do." He answered in a heartbeat fearing all was a dream. He knew vampires couldn't sleep either dream, but it felt too good to be true. He didn't want to concentrate on other human being but his soon to be wife, although Jasper thoughts were driving him crazy with worry.
Why is she so anxious? She feels sad and I can't stand it. If I could I would be crying right now from the longing she is feeling.
Was it possible she was changing her mind? He knew he would let her go, but still, there was a chance she just was scared. After all she was only eighteen.
"You love me, too. Not the same way, I know. But he's not your whole life, either. Not anymore."
Bella heard those words deep inside her head and knew them to be true. Jacob was the direct consequence of Edward's abandon. A consequence that was ruling her mind in the most important day of her life. All too soon she noticed the priest turn to look at her directly. It was her moment, her decision and knowing what to say by heart she got ready for detaching herself from her past.
"Isabella Swan, do you take Edward Cullen for your lawful husband, to have and to hold, from this day forward, for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, until death do you part?" The last statement did not matter, given that they weren't going to die. That fact made their union even more final and this whole charade even more useless to Bella.
"I-I…" Her mind was screaming yes, her mouth said nothing instead. Did she promise to love and cherish Edward and only Edward for the rest of her life and forever? She thought she knew. Forever was scaring her now though.
"When are you finally going to figure out that you're in love with me, too?" He had asked her impatiently. Jake knew what Bella was denying, and he would wait patiently for her to realize. Something in her eyes told him it wouldn't take much more time.
She loved Jacob Black. She had realized long ago but the sentiment hadn't come as stronger as in that moment. Bella couldn't hear the quiet gasps of the reception guests or Edward calling her name.
"Isabella dear, we asked you a question." She looked up at the minister then at Edward pained face and her heart broke for him. It broke her heart because she couldn't give him the response he desired. It wasn't just fear of marriage and eternal compromise. She wasn't ready to leave behind all that a human life could offer.
Three rows behind Billy held his breath and squeezed Sue's hand leaning over his chair praying not to be dreaming. Charlie's heart was beating way too fast and he feared a coronary was going to take place in the middle of the wedding, but he couldn't help but feel hope. Renee though smiled knowingly at her husband Phil who just looked put out. The Cullen's could have had a heart attack too if they hearts had been beating. Alice gasped and saw Bella's future disappear, meaning one thing.
Before Bella could stop the wedding, Edward closed his eyes as if someone had stabbed him on the chest. In a way someone had. Alice thoughts had.
"It was the natural path your life would have taken."
Nature, air, sun, life, warmth. All the things she ever wanted and hadn't felt in so long. Why had she changed everything she liked, she loved… all that she was? Why was she putting up with this circus when she felt trapped and manipulated like some china doll? When her real interests had become second to Edward's nature?
She wasn't going to let go of human emotions, experiences or benefits. Bella couldn't get married. Not to Edward anyway.
"I can't." She sentenced and all their guests gasped loudly at her refusal. She tried to avoid looking at the grooms devastated face and apologized for her thoughtfulness ways. Letting go of his cold hard hands she removed the promise ring from her finger, a fresh set of tears damping her rosy cheeks.
"I'm so sorry-" she sniffed and took the diamond charm from her bracelet. "I'm sorry for hurting you this way, believe me I care for you, I love you but…" She didn't know what to say anymore. Bella just felt she had to get out of there and fast. Edward did not make it easy though.
"We can wait a little bit." He grabbed her hands and refused to grab the ring and diamond she was offering as a sign of her refusal. "We love each other, we belong together Bella." He did not mind to beg, she couldn't be leaving him after all they had been through.
"Ed-Edward please," his inhumanly strength made it impossible for Bella to move when she wanted to run away, but her father and Carlisle came to her rescue.
"Son, let her go." Mr. Cullen touched his son's shoulder and Edward's hands went slack. His face emotionless and dead.
"Bella, what's going on?" Charlie embraced her daughter and took her aside while all the guests hesitated about their next move.
"Dad, I can't get married. Jacob…he…" She didn't need to say more. Even Billy had heard it all and smiled despite the ruckus going on all around him. To say that Mr. Weber's face was shocked would have been an understatement.
Jacob. Jacob. Jacob. Jacob. Her head and heart chanted at the same time.
"You can have me the way I am- bad behavior included- or not at all."
She need that, she wanted that. Even his lame jokes and his impatient cocky attitude. Bella looked around herself and apologized to the Cullen family while she made a run for it.
Seth winked at her as she passed by him and said: "Good luck runaway bride." She saw from the corner of her eye Rosalie smile at her nodding as if to show her this was the right thing to do.
She tripped two or three times but she reached her truck Renee hot in her heels and Billy rolling himself behind her. She contemplated the idea of taking a faster car since she wanted to get to the reservation rather quickly, but she had taken enough from the Cullen's. She would have to push her baby to its maximum.
"Bella, God the dress!" Her mother shrieked putting the rest of the large gown inside the cab of the red truck before she closed the door. "Love you baby girl."
"Love you mom." Bella took off watching from the rear view mirror his mom wave frantically at her and her father roll Billy by her side a large smile across his bearded face.
Leaving Forks she put the veil aside and placed it carefully next to her. Her nude finger felt weird, but a good kind of weird. The label of: "Welcome to La Push" greeted her and she smiled – truly smiled- for the first time in the day.
"You could be happy if you'd let go. You could be happy… with me."
She knocked furiously at the Black's door but there was no answer. She managed- raising the large gown to her knees- to look through the windows and saw nobody inside.
Was it possible that Jake had run away again before he gave her the chance to find him? She turned around and a group of teenage boys were looking at her as if she was crazy. She ran to them and asked them if they had seen Jacob, since he was popular on the Rez, but they shook their heads almost laughing at her. She looked like a damn ghost bride searching for her long gone lover.
She saw Embry and Paul walking through the street and kept on running till she was right in front of them.
"Bella! What are you doing here?" Embry asked while Paul looked at her with eyes as big as saucers. They couldn't believe she had come back for their friend after all.
"Jake, where is Jake?" Bella asked desperately.
Jacob stood up throwing a rock onto the water and saw it sinking to the bottom. His life was sinking at the same speed. It seemed even comical to have such strong feelings at such a young age, but he had known them all first hand. Oddly enough, he wouldn't take it back.
As much as he wanted to forget Bella, he didn't want to let go of her smile and the memory of the twinkle of her eyes when he told a funny story or just antagonized her. Her soft laugh and more things would change once he turned, as would do her smell. Strawberries no more, he thought. The frown came back to his face. He still loved her but he had to learn to live without her. He was going to respect her decision, but he could not approve of it and because of that he had to leave.
Sighing deeply he brushed his now not so short hair- since she liked it long- with one hand and paced around for a few minutes. He did not want to say goodbye. She wouldn't care after all. The sun was already setting and he knew by then the "I do's" were already said. They would be eating and drinking before the couple left- those who could eat and drink and had a heartbeat. He felt nauseated.
For a moment he thought it not to be true. Jake let himself feel happy again, just a couple of seconds. So what if it hurt him in the end? He couldn't get any lower. He even heard the roar of her truck approaching and he smiled recalling all the times she went to visit him with a tentative shy smile on her pink lips.
He heard ruffling and a ragged breath and he knew he wasn't imagining that. Turning around he thought he was hallucinating.
"Ja-Jake…" She panted beside her car. Bella stood there catching her breath admiring the bronze god before her.
Jake couldn't believe his eyes, yet there she was looking all beautiful and flustered. Even with her hair in disarray and gathering what was left of the silky white gown, she was everything he always wanted.
Bella knew she was lucky, not only he had loved her while they were friends, but after all she had put him through she still could see how his face lit up with her presence. Kicking off her-brutally expensive- stilettos she did what she desired for the second time that day: she ran to him.
Even if she had to trip four or a million times, she was going to get up and go on running because he was worth it.
They both couldn't believe what was happening and Bella laughed as she reached his strong warm arms and she jumped- as little as she could- and hold onto his body for dear life.
"You are here." Jacob smelled her scented aroma, still not believing his ears nor his eyes, but his hands grabbing her delicate frame was enough proof for him. He felt something snap inside of him and his hold on her tightened, pulling her against him and buried his face on the crook of her neck.
She couldn't breathe, but she did not mind. Just the feeling of his hair between her fingers and his manly woody scent was all she needed. Bella had been so close to lose it all. She had been so naïve, but no more.
"I'm sorry." She sobbed still attached at him. "I'm so sorry." Apologizing again in the same day was really taking a toll on her. How many people had she hurt with her selfish ways? "I had to run away, your voice is what kept ringing through my ears all time while the ceremony-y,"
"Bells." He inhaled her scent again. She was with him, human and warm and it was all that mattered. "Bells…" He let her feet touch the sand which had turned cold. He took hold of her tear stained face with both hands and looked her in the eye. For real this time, he smiled at her. He felt some tears of his own want to run down his face but he kept them at bay. "Baby,"
Touching their foreheads they let sink in how much their lives were going to change.
"You did not fall over?" Bella heard Jake's husky voice with a hint of sarcasm.
Taking hold of his slim waist she gripped the skin there, and nudged his face with hers. She couldn't wait anymore to say what she had to say. It was burning her inside to keep her feelings at bay, so she impatiently took Jacob's hands and squeezed them to get his attention.
His gaze softened once it landed up on her eyes. Maybe they weren't perfectly fine, but they would be. Bella would do anything to make that happen.
"I'm sorry for being so headstrong, so obstinate and such a bad friend. I was a self centered teenager girl and you changed that. I'm sorry for hurting you and make you feel like you weren't enough. " She started and when he went to interrupt her she pecked his lips which silenced him effectively. He was so stunned he could barely stand. "For let you go through so much and shutting you out of my life. I had to be far away from the warmth you got me used to, to know I couldn't live without it, without you." Her voice cracked but her resolve only grew. "I didn't deserve the love you had for me and I still don't deserve it, but I'm being selfish once again and for the last time: Jacob, kiss me. Kiss me and come back to me."
He didn't need any more invitation and grabbed her face with one hand while the other pressed their chests together. He leaned in and took her mouth in his without hesitation, without fear of her pulling away. Moving their lips together felt like heaven. Bella's hand gripped the back of Jacob's neck bringing him closer than they had ever been and opened her mouth inviting him. She wanted to breathe into him. Their kiss quickly grew into something more passionate as she felt she could jump him right then and there. Jacob's hands moved frantically from her waist to her hair and down her sides stirring goosebumps on their wake. They needed oxygen but they didn't care, needing to prove how much they had missed each other.
Pulling away Jacob tried to get enough air into his lungs to say a raspy I love you.
It was more than enough to her.
"You already know this, but I love you too." As Bella took the pins off of her hair and threw them in the sand, Jacob noticed the bracelet on her arm.
He touched the craved wolf and was surprised at the missing diamond on it.
"You wore it on the wedding?" He asked moved. Never such a simple present had meant so much for two friends.
"Always. I didn't know why I couldn't…take it off." Her eyes turned glossy again but those were happy tears so she let them fall. "Now I know though."
"Even when I was running away from you?" He could help feeling anxious at the memory. It hadn't been long ago since he was desperately trying to get away from her.
"Even then. It doesn't matter if you run away, because I run to you." Bella mumbled against his lips.
Nature, air, sun, life, warmth. That's all she felt surrounding her.
It was the day she felt like she belonged.
It was that day.
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