I always get myself in these pickles. And they aren't your ordinary dill pickles. No, these are bathed in a concoction of arsenic, nitroglycerin, and fire-whiskey. Yes, too much fire whiskey. Damn that sexy beast. I thought he was taking me back to his place for a shag. I was so mistaken. It wouldn't have been too outrageous for me, especially at Iron Leggings. Let's see, there was Zoey, Davis, Roshandala, and that sexy pair of male twins. But this guy was different. He was rather nicely dressed with a fez and bowtie. Seriously, a fez and a bowtie, that's just bizarre. I've had my quirky outfits, too, but this guy was adorning himself with the most outdated accessories. Though, they made him, what's the word … mysterious. Maybe it's tantalizing. And that was all the hook I needed to follow him to wherever he wanted.
We came up to a police call box. Yup, it was official, this guy was a lunatic. First he walks into a popular gay bar, wearing a bowtie and a fez. Then, he expects me to shag him in a police call box. I don't think it's right to be doing the business in a place where people contact the police. I was kind of afraid to refuse his gesture to come in. What if he really was a psychotic loon, who was going to rape me if I kept taking his lucky charms? I stretched my arm to the door, reaching for the handle. I was rooted there, petrified in terror and shock. Three arms were extended from the booth. Each was different. One was in the sleeve of the lunatic who brought me here. One was a cream color, with a soft, feminine appeal about it. The last was male. Definitely male. Rough hands and hairy arms all led to man. Each hand grabbed at my frozen limb, and dragged me in.
The inside was about fifteen times larger than the outward appearance. Why was this such a weird experience? I mean it's not like I haven't experienced space compression before. The inside of Lily's closet had compression magic. What had made this so unordinary? I blame the six shots of fire-whiskey. The inside of this call box was bizarre. I kept exploring every inch. The bowtied man walked over to me, and inquired something, but I was too distracted by the equipment in this so called police box. And then, nothing. Everything went black as my head swelled in pain.