Hey there! My first Harry Potter fic after not reading the books in FOREVER. ; Don't judge. It's guaranteed to be at least a bit OOC, and weirdly structured. Cause that's been my writing style as of late for some weird reason. Either way, I hope you enjoy. And don't get angry at me for this. Because honestly, I really do ship JamesxSeverus... anyways, you'll see what I mean. Read on and see if you like this late night concoction at all. :) Btw, I don't own the Harry Potter series. If I did, the books would have gone a bit differently... less of a certain SB dying and more of a certain HP dying (because I found the kid to be... less than ideal for a main character, lol).
I couldn't watch her fall for him. Not my beautiful Lily, my friend, the young woman I loved more than I did my own family. More than I loved myself, even. But every time her beautiful green eyes alighted on his athletic form and dark, sparkling eyes, I could see her falling further. Even trying to talk to her about how much of an arse he was didn't seem to help. She was softening.
So I did the last thing I ever wanted to do. I talked to him. Alone.
The tall Seeker had sneered at me when I entered the library just after him. I had followed from a distance, listening to his friends yammer on about Quidditch and other things I didn't particularly care about as they walked the halls. When Potter had finally muttered that he needed to enter the library—something about a Transfiguration essay—adrenaline pumped through my veins. That was my chance. And I followed like the angry, protective, Slytherin friend of Lily I was.
He walked away from me, deeper into the shelves upon shelves of knowledge surrounding the both of us. I followed tentatively, more out of a lack of words than from fear of the obviously bigger male… after all, I was the better of the two of us with a wand. Only when his git friends around was I really at a disadvantage.
I found him finally, sitting at a small round table with a single, mostly unscathed copy of some book open on the smooth wood. The glasses he always wore were sitting on the table next to the volume, and his nose was scant inches from the text. My gaze followed one of his hands as it raked through his already messy hair, causing it to look even more like he had just fallen out of bed. That ugly gold and red tie hung loosely around his neck, not quite looking sloppy.
"Potter, we need to talk," I spoke smoothly. Even to my own ears, I sounded confident and very unlike myself. And when he looked up at me, puzzlement clear on his annoyingly handsome face, I actually felt tall. "This is about Lily."
James Potter, the infinitely handsome and popular Quidditch star of Gryffindor, smirked like the complete asshole he was as he sat back. My wand poked me in the ribs as I crossed my arms in an attempt to stay confident while locked in the probing, haughty gaze of the imposing lion. A tense moment passed between us before Potter finally spoke, "What a surprise to see you here, Snivellus."
A sharp reply was clawing its way from my throat, fighting against my tongue and lips to be thrown at the young man before me. But I couldn't do that. Not only because it would create a fight, but I wouldn't be able to free my best friend from his clutches peacefully (and without copious hexing from both our parts). Instead, I sighed and stepped forward and rested my hands atop the back of the chair opposite of Potter, "I'm not here to argue with you. Nor am I here to duel you. We really do need to talk about… about Lily."
"What? Jealous that pretty little Evans is going for me rather than you? It's not surprising, you know, seeing as I'm fucking gorgeous and you're just a brooding little maggot."
My fists clenched against the chair, and Potter's eyes flicked to the movement quickly. His eyes took on a defensive sheen as a single hand slid below my line of vision. I suspected he was feeling for his wand in case I became a threat to him, but the motion didn't bother me. He was in no danger as of yet.
"She and I have never been like that. We're… just friends. We'll always only be friends. And I want us to stay that way."
"What does me and Evans getting together have to do with you, Snivelly?"
"Lily and I, you mean," I wanted to say just to knock his pride down a notch. He was leaning quite far back in his seat now, the front two chair legs suspended in the air as his dark eyes brushed over me like the tendrils of a gossamer web. My whole body felt as if it was burning under the scrutiny and suggestive insults of the larger man, and I blanched in anger.
"If she goes with you, Potter, I doubt she and I will ever be able to be together again. To just talk and be friends. To be happy with each other's company."
For some reason, he looked sad and confused. Wasn't it obvious why she and I would never be as good of friends again? "We cannot very well be together without you there as well… and whatever children you have together if you manage to trick her into marrying you at the end of this year. She would want to make you and me friends within the first week of the two of you dating."
The upset I felt in my stomach and chest must have shown on my face, because the tall Seeker stood up and hovered over me. I looked up at him after a minute of controlled breathing, wanting so badly to hex the unreadable expression off his handsome face. He wasn't smirking anymore. "And what makes you think she would ever do that?"
"Because she still cares about me as her friend. And she cares about you as… whatever it is she wants to be delusional about. And I know that if you two were to get together as you so obviously hope, she won't be able to—"
"What makes you think I would hate being friends with you?"
"Hmmm, I wonder. Everything I've ever gotten from you and your friends has spoken against me as even a simple human being. You do not respect me; you hurt me; you… why the fuck am I explaining any of this to you? None of this situation has anything to do with me; this has to do with Lily."
Potter seemed suddenly too close, making me look further up to meet his inscrutable gaze. I backed up, away from him and creating more space. He smirked slightly. "Oh, but I think this has a lot to do with you, Snape."
I couldn't help the glare I pinned him with. First, he had used my real name instead of a hurtful slur, second, he was misunderstanding the whole conversation and the point of it, and third, he had used my real name. There was something weird going on… something that didn't quite make sense. Adding all that to the lack of constant insults and the unusual way he was addressing me without seeming like a wary cat was unnerving. Everything was… off. He stepped closer to me, a slight smile gracing his lips.
"This has everything to do with—"
I was silenced with a set of smooth lips pressed against mine. In shock and a little bit of disgust, I tried to pull away, only to be pulled into him with an arm around my back and a hand fisting my hair. My lack of positive response had him pulling away and panting slightly. He stared at me with dilated eyes that would have seemed almost beautiful if they hadn't belong to James Potter, the second biggest asshole in the school. "Kiss me."
His found had sounded weird. For Mister Quidditch All-Star that is. What was going on with him? A moment or two passed where I didn't understand what the hell he had said, as well. Kiss him? Why would I want to do that? The only one of the stupid so-called Marauders I was attracted to probably hated me more than this cock did… and I still didn't want to kiss him!
My wand was out in a second, its smoothly pointed end jabbing harshly into the muscles of his stomach. His gaze didn't leave mine, and I noticed a slight change in the color… were they darkening? Why? Potter jerked himself away with more ferocity than he had pushed himself upon me. His tongue danced his lips nervously. Something about him began to look differently. His eyes looked frantic rather than mysteriously sexy and ever so slightly alluring.
"Potter… are you feeling altogether well?"
"Why the fuck would you care?" He snarled with a half-hearted glare and a voice that was not totally his own. After he spoke, his right hand rose to touch his throat and he looked pleadingly at me. I cocked a single brow, waiting for him to say anything more. Oddly enough, I was a bit worried. Had he eaten or drank something tainted by one of my housemates?
His hands shot out and gripped my shoulders firmly, jerking me backwards slightly in his haste. I glared, but let him do as he pleased if only to assess what was affecting him; all thoughts of he and Lily together were gone. Now I was the potions genius, the one who could cure anything and cause just as much. "Severus, please… meet me at the Astronomy Tower tomorrow night… I… just do it, okay?"
I nodded, ignoring what such a response might mean to him. There seemed to be nothing too totally wrong, though his whole being seemed to be slowly changing. His face even looked different now. Less like James Potter, and more like the only male I had ever found myself attracted to. Even his hair was looking longer than it had a few minutes before.
"Say it. Promise me." He was even sounding more like him, too…
"I'll meet you in the blasted Astronomy Tower, no matter how much it goes against my better judgment, alright?" I felt stupid saying it, but I was too absorbed with the quickening transformation.
With a beaming and totally uncharacteristic grin, he leaned in and kissed me again, swiping his tongue quickly across the seam of my closed mouth. And with that he was gone, running away so fast that I barely registered his being gone (and even managed to snatch up his glasses). I stood there dumbfounded before pulling out a chair and practically falling into it. Well, that hadn't gone as planned. At all. In any sense of the phrase. We hadn't talked about what I had come to talk about, and the bastard had even kissed me!
And to top it off, he had begun to look more and more like a different Marauder the longer we stood face to face… if I hadn't been so worried about what the kiss was supposed to imply, or what would happen if Lily were to find out, I probably would have figured it out. But… Lily was my main focus, and she needed to stay that way.
James Potter could go fuck himself in that Astronomy Tower for all I cared. But I was still going to show up there. A promise is a promise, even if one hates it.
Outside of the library, a very panicked and elated young Gryffindor sat panting under a borrowed invisibility cloak in borrowed clothing, with borrowed glasses in hand. He couldn't believe he hadn't had enough self-restraint not to kiss the smaller man, like he had told James he would. And he knew James wouldn't get a kick out of finding out that his best mate had attempted to orally rape Snivellus' face in the library when he had been sent to get the slimy snake off his trail.
And to talk with him about the whole Lily thing. The whole Lily thing that was supposed to have James Potter asking for Severus' permission (as her best friend) to date the red-head. There hadn't been nearly as much talking as he had promised his best friend. And that probably wasn't the best thing in this situation.
But think on the bright side, his mind screamed with the rush of having kissed the man he liked. He agreed to meet you up at the tower. He'll be fine seeing you again. He doesn't hate—he doesn't hate James Potter. Not him. Not the man who actually cared even though he pretended not to all the time. Even though he picked on Severus more than any of the other Marauders combined. Severus Snape agreed to meet James Potter. What would he think if he met him instead?
Standing fluidly, Sirius shook out his luxurious raven mane to clear his mind. He would have to ask James for another hair. And ask Remus about making the Polyjuice Potion again… making up some excuse about picking on the Hufflepuff first years or something. Because really, this was their last year at Hogwarts, and how else was he going to win Severus' love if he didn't push the limits?
He only hoped that James would agree. If he didn't, well then James Potter could go fuck himself. Sirius was going to that Astronomy Tower either way. Severus deserved to know the truth… even if it hurt Sirius in the end.
Yeah, don't be angry about the sectioning of JamesxSeverus when it's truly SiriusxSeverus. And a very pansy-esque, very-much-like-a-little-school-girl-and-not-like-his-real-self, Sirius Black to boot, lol. But was it at least okay? I don't expect anything from this little fic in the way of reviews, but I do like people reading it. Because I can always see the reading count. Either way, there's at least 5 minutes of your life you'll never get back. :P Sorry to waste it with crap-slash! Love you guys anyways, even if my shitty story output says very much otherwise. ;D