Circle of Memories

FYI: FOUL LANGUAGE USED ONCE OR TWICE: You have been warned.

Life is like a wheel, sometimes you're at the top, sometimes you're at the bottom, and no matter what you do, you'll see the other side someday.

Sora sat on the beach and stared out at the sunset he had grown used to over the years.

"It seems like it was only a short while ago that we were sitting here watching the sunset together." Sora slipped a small silver ring off his right hand and held it up to the setting sun.

Sora's face contorted as he tried to hide his sadness for someone who wasn't there. "Too bad it was over a year ago..."

"And then after the sunset, we would watch the stars, and always hope for a shooting star..." Sora looked up hopefully.

"Heh, of course there's no stars out, sun's still setting." Sora's head drooped down. "and there's too many clouds..."

Sora pulled his legs to his chest and started to stare at the small sliver of metal in his hand.

I think I wasted too much time on you.
You don't care about me.
You would rather go get yourself hurt by someone else.
I would never reject or judge you.
I never do for anyone.
Even the person you spoke so ill of, I still don't hate.
But enough is enough.
I have been nothing but
Kind
Caring
Courteous
Charming
and there for you.
I even changed for you too.
Sacrificed my health, and a little of my school.
But you don't care.
You have your eyes set on someone else.
All the while telling me you weren't ready for a relationship.
Bullshit.
You just don't want to be with me.
JUST FUCKING TELL ME THE TRUTH.
It hurts more when you lie to me.
Just like it hurt when you used me.
For sex.
For attention.
For approval.

I had been telling myself that you weren't bad, that you weren't manipulating me on purpose.
Well, you may not be
But it's still manipulation.
You say that you're ugly.
And you are.
On the inside.
Even on the inside you hide behind a facade of innocence and ignorance.
When will you grow up?
When will the little girl stop asking for help from others
And actually help herself?
You ask for help.
But you don't want people to help you.
I thought I was in love with you.
And I was.
And I am.
Still.

Seems like nothing has changed.
But it has.
I realize now
That no matter how much I want you,
I dont' need you.
I don't need your love, or affection.
I don't need your insults, or disrespect.
I don't need your whining, and self-inflicted helplessness.
I don't need your hugs, or your tender kisses.
I don't need your lies, or your half-truths.
I still Love you, don't get me wrong.
But my eyes have been opened to what you really are.
A simple human being
Who has been
Crushed
Cut
Bruised
Hurt
Abused
and possibly
Used.
You know something?
You've done half of those things to me.
You are a scarred, simple person, looking for affection where there is none.
Just.
Like
Everyone.
Else.

Sora jerked awake from his dream.

"I must have dozed off... Ow!" Sora felt a sharp pain in his right hand, upon opening it, the ring had left a detailed etching in the shape of a dragon claw into his palm.

*sigh* "I don't want to lose this." Sora put the ring back on his pinky finger and flopped back on the sand.

"Too many good memories for me to lose this ring now. And after all the pain I've been through with it, I don't want to lose those memories either. May as well keep a token prize." Sora shifted uncomfortably on the sand.

"Well, I could stand to forget the one time I had to drudge through a half-frozen pond just to retrieve the damn thing." Sora sighed and closed his eyes.

"Come to think of it, she's really the main reason that whole fiasco happened in the first place. Kinda."

A/N I'm definitely wanting to continue this, but I really don't know when or if I'll have the time. If I never do I hope the dream thingy will give you enough background to come up with a wild backstory. I'm certainly interested to hear theories! (Potential story is completely set, because I'm drawing all of this from personal experience.) Sorry that I haven't done anything in a while. Review if you want, etc, etc.