Author's Note
Once again I am sooooooooooooooo sorry for the dely! I just haven't been too inspired to write :( but I'm back!
This just randomly popped into my head so I thought I'd see how you all liked it?
Before you say I have facts wrong about depression, don't because I have it, I know what it's like, and yes, every case is different but this is similar to how I feel on my...let's just call the 'bad days'.
I own nothing and any mistakes are mine!
Trigger warnings are in the summary, let me know if I missed any and I will be sure to add it in.
SWAN QUEEN
Seeing Henry walk away from her was always difficult...even just seeing him go to get the school bus.
This time though...this time he'd left and promised her that he was never going back.
He'd said this many times before but...this time she knew he meant it.
Now he's off with his "real mother"...Emma Swan...the bane of her existence.
The blonde who she hates...but also loves so much.
She wouldn't say she loved Emma since the moment she layed eyes on her, no, her feelings began when Emma saved her from a burning building...then there were more feelings after the blonde saved Henry from the mines...then more when she'd woken Henry with true love's kiss...but the moment Regina Mills fell in love with Emma Swan would have to be when the blonde saved her from falling through Jefferson's hat into the Enchanted Forest.
But Emma's not the reason she's here now...in her en suite bathroom...sitting on the toilet seat in only her underwear, tears streaming down her face and a razor in one hand and one of Henry's baby toys in the other...she wants to do it...thinks it would be better for everyone, Henry especially, if she were gone.
That's all she's thought about since Henry left three days ago...her thoughts are...everyone would be better off without me...Henry would be happy...Emma would be happy...Snow and Charming would squeal with delight...all she's ever been is a disappointment...to her parents...Henry...hell even Emma and Snow...she feels guilty for all that she's done she feels guilty things she hasn't done...she should just crawl up in a hole...and die...
Thinking about everything just made her worse...which is why she finally broke...why she's sitting where she is now...the sharp blade so close to her wrist she could practically feel how cold it is.
The thoughts increase...telling her she should just get it over with before she doesn't go through with it...so she starts...
She presses the razor hard against her wrist...and just cuts...anywhere she can...she then does the other wrist and starts to feel a little dizzy due to blood loss. She notices she got blood on Henry's toy and her breathing increases...
"No...no no no no no...NO!" she yells, gripping the toy for dear life and using a towel to try to get rid of the blood..."Come on Rexy...Henry won't like it if you've got blood on you...remember when he spilt his apple juice...gods it was chaos..." she was laughing now...at herself and at the memory..."Great...I'm talking to a stuffed dragon..." Regina tried to tell Henry that Rexy wasn't a T-Rex but he was having none of it. Just as she was about to get up and try to clean Rexy, she heard the front door slam.
"Regina?! You home?"
"Emma..." she whispered.
"Regina?! Hello?!"
Regina kept quiet...go away Emma...you can't see me like this
She squeezed her eyes shut...hoping for Emma to go away.
Just then she heard it...a gasp.
"Regina?" Emma breathed, and rushed to kneel at her side.
"Emma..."
"Regina what the hell?"
"How's Henry?"
"What?! Regina how can you a-"
"How. Is. Henry, Miss Swan."
Emma sighed and said, "Henry's...Henry misses you. He sent me over here to check on you."
"He did?" Regina couldn't believe it.
"Yeah...and I wanted to check on you anyway. No ones seen you around...where have you been?" Emma asked, concerned.
"In bed."
"For three days straight?"
"Yes..."
"God what am I doing?! Where's your first aid kit?"
"No."
"What? What do you mean no?!"
"Just let me go Emma."
"NO!" Emma was crying too now, "There is no way in hell I am letting you do this."
"Rexy..." Regina whispered.
"What?"
"Rexy..." she looked over to the bloodied toy.
"Was this Henry's?" Emma asked, picking up Rexy.
"Yes...it was his favourite...he was convinced it was a flying T-Rex...hence the name Rexy." Regina chocked out a laugh and Emma did the same.
"Regina."
"Emma...I want you to get that cleaned...and I want you to give it to Henry and tell him I'm sorry."
"You can tell him yourself Regina...now tell me where the god damn first aid kit is!"
"Emma wait...I'll tell you just...come here first."
Emma kneeled back down beside Regina, closer this time."
"Emma I..." she took a deep breath, "I love you Emma Swan..."
"What? You...you love me? Since when?"
"A while...since you fell into the portal to the Enchanted Forest..."
"Woah..." Emma breathed.
"Emma I know you may not love me back but...all I ask before anything else happens...all I ask is you...you give me...just one kiss...it's all I've wanted for a while now, other than Henry."
Emma didn't say anything, she just gave Regina what she wanted.
It was the best thing Regina ever experienced...other than raising Henry.
They broke apart, both of them sobbing. "Thank you." Regina said first.
"Regina...I love you too."
"Don't Emma...don't say that."
"But it's true...I've loved you for...a really...really long time...which is why...after I get you to the hospital and get you all patched up...I'm going to take you out on a date. What do you-Regina?!"
Emma had been looking down nervously the entire time, not noticing Regina had passed out.
"Shit Regina!"
Emma lifted Regina up bridal style and drove her to the hospital.
SWAN QUEEN
Some hours later, the longest of Emma and Henry's lives, the doctor, thankfully not Whale, said they could go see Regina.
"Mom!" Henry yelled as he ran into Regina's hospital room. "I'm so so so sorry mom! I didn't mean anything I said! I love you so much mom!"
"Shhh...I know my little prince...I know...it's okay now."
"You found Rexy." Henry said in a small voice.
"Yes...well I never lost him."
"Huh?"
"He's been in my room the whole time." Regina told Henry, smiling.
"Why?" he asked.
"Because you said, and I quote, "No momma I don't need Rexy anymore I'm a big boy now!""
Henry blushed and said, "Whatever..."
"Come here!" Regina said, laughing and Henry snuggled into his mothers side, something he hadn't done in years.
After Henry fell asleep, Emma said, "I meant what I said y'know...I do love you."
"Really?"
"Yeah."
"Well then, my saviour, "Regina said, smirking, "What are you going to do about it?"
Emma smirked back and replied, "Well, I'm going to kiss you, then as soon as you're sorted, I'm taking you on a date."
"Oh really?"
"Yes really. And you can't say no cause...y'know...you love me...and I just saved your life."
Regina sighed happily and said, "My Saviour..."
SWAN QUEEN
Sooooooooooooo? What'd you all think? Should I continue or leave this as a one shot?
Thank you all so much for the continued love and support!
Reviews etc are HUGELY appreciated!
I love you all and I hope you enjoyed!
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