Okay, I'm sure there's a ton of post-finale fics out there by now and they're probably all better than this. And I loved the finale so much I almost didn't want to write anything because it was so perfect. But then I had to, so here we are.
—
1
fall
After the hugs there's the Happy Dance, and then more hugs, and then unpacking. Miley flops down on the bed, her bed. It doesn't have her duvet or anything on it yet. She only brought the one suitcase with her on the plane. Her dad is sending the rest of her things.
Lilly stands right next to the bed and grins down at her. She's still kind of bouncing with excitement, but jetlag is catching up to Miley fast. Lilly grins and bounces and looks like she might start clapping her hands if Miley doesn't give her something else to do with them.
"All right, one more hug," Miley says. "But I'm not getting up."
Lilly lies on the bed and they hug again, another of the really good ones, the kind where you can't breathe, but who cares about breathing when someone is happy enough to see you that they hug you like that? Then Lilly twists on her back next to Miley. She's lying on Miley's sweatshirt, because, well, Miley's sweatshirt pretty much covers the whole bed.
"I can't believe you're really here," Lilly says.
"I can't believe I really wore this sweatshirt," Miley says, yawning.
Lilly laughs. She sits up and scoots down the bed, lifting the edge of the sweatshirt and sticking her head under it. "What are you doing?" Miley asks as Lilly wiggles her way up inside it.
"I want to see if we can both really fit in it." Lilly's voice is muffled by the fabric.
"You're insane. You know that, right? Oof." One of Lilly's elbows catches her in the side and Miley isn't sure whether Lilly did it on purpose or not.
Lilly's head pops out next to Miley's. She's lying on her side now, and the neck hole isn't all that big, forcing their heads so close together that when Lilly lays hers on the pillow her forehead knocks against Miley's skull. "We totally fit," she chortles. "Your dad is ridiculous."
Miley lifts a hand and plucks at the front of the sweatshirt, tenting up the material. It might be tight at the neck, but there's still enough room in the rest of it that it comes up a foot off their bodies. "I think we could probably even get a few more people in here."
"You want me to go get Amber and Ashley from next door?" Lilly jokes.
"Ugh. No, thanks." Lilly starts to move again and Miley groans. "Now what are you doing?"
"Getting out."
"No," Miley tells her, yawning again. She is too tired for this. "You about cracked one of my ribs getting in. Just...let me lay here a minute and rest, and then we'll both get up and take it off that way."
So Lilly goes still, and then a second later she slides an arm across Miley's waist and hugs her again. A different kind of hug, a hug like the grip you use on a baby bird that's fallen out of its nest, so you can keep hold but not crush it. It's maybe an even better kind of hug than the other, because a hug like this can just keep going on forever.
Miley closes her eyes, and right before sleep knocks into her like Lilly's elbow, she thinks, Paris has nothing on this.
—
Lilly waits for Miley to fall asleep and then she carefully wriggles out of the sweatshirt, making sure to keep her elbows to herself this time. Miley might be jetlagged into oblivion, but Lilly is too happy to be still right now. She calls her parents and Oliver to give them the good news, and even then she doesn't think she can just go back to reading, so she calls Joannie.
"Miley came back," she squeals into the phone. Quietly.
"Huh," Joannie says. "That's a surprise."
"I know, right? I couldn't believe it when I opened up the door and she was there. She said there'll other tours and movies, but she's only going to get one chance to go to college with her best friend."
"So she's staying?"
"Yeah. She's staying." Lilly sits on the bed and draws her legs up so she can hug her knees. Miley's staying.
"Wow. Impressive. And here I thought you were going to be the one to cave first."
"What?" Lilly lets go of her knees, sits cross-legged. "What are you talking about?"
"I mean when I saw you calling, I thought you were going to tell me you changed your mind again and you were in Paris."
"I wasn't – I didn't change my mind. I wasn't going to Paris. Even if she didn't come back, I wasn't going to Paris." Lilly wonders where all her happiness went. Instead she feels like she did in the airport, walking away from Miley, every step the hardest thing she'd ever done.
"Good," Joannie says stoutly. "Stewart needs to know you aren't going to spend your life following her around like a puppy."
"It wasn't like that," Lilly protests, even though it kind of was. And if it was, what does it mean that this time Miley followed her?
"Whatever," Joannie says. "It was a pretty decent move, I'll give her that."
"More like spectacular."
"If you say so. I gotta run, T-cott. Go have fun."
"Yeah," Lilly says. She hangs up and looks over at Miley sleeping on the other bed. She pushes the conversation with Joannie out of her head and lets all of her shocked, happy wonder seep back up. Miley's here. Miley's staying. This is going to be the best four years of their lives.
—
Halfway through the term and Miley has her first big paper due in less than two days. She hasn't even picked a topic yet. She's at their desk, wading through article after article on her laptop while Lilly lies on her stomach on the bed, studying for a Psych midterm.
"I could be in Paris making a movie right now," Miley grumbles. "I could be having lunch with Tom Cruise."
Lilly points with her pencil. "Door's that way."
Miley sighs. It's a very dramatic and weighty sigh that would've looked great in a close-up on the big screen. Miley is sure it also would've provoked sympathy for her character's plight in hearts all across America, but when she looks over her shoulder, Lilly's just ignoring her.
"You could write my paper for me," Miley tries.
"No."
"But I gave up a big Hollywood movie so I could go to college with you!"
"And writing papers is part of college," Lilly says, unperturbed.
Miley sighs again and takes her laptop and stands right next to Lilly's bed until Lilly looks up at her. "What?"
"Move over."
"You've got your own bed."
"Oh, come on, I could be having french fries with Steven Spielberg at the Golden Arches of Triumph right now. The least you can do is scoot over half a foot."
Lilly rolls her eyes but moves, and Miley sprawls out on the bed, puts her laptop next to Lilly's textbook. Lilly's legs are bent at the knees, slowly swinging back and forth, and Miley copies her, careful not to let her feet go too far down and land on Lilly's pillow. Lilly has a thing about feet on her pillow.
"You're going to have to knock off the Steven Spielberg stuff," Lilly says, huffing.
"Oh, really?" Miley asks. "Because I can leave if it's bothering you. Paris is beautiful in the fall." She shifts a little on the bed, pretending like she's going to get up and head for the door. Lilly snakes her arm through Miley's and moves her foot so that it catches Miley's ankle.
"You're not going anywhere, Stewart."
Miley smiles and clicks on another article. Their joined legs swing up and down and up again. Only one chance, she thinks, and, Don't screw it up.
—
One of the frats throws a party once finals finish. "We have to go," Lilly says. "Parties are a huge part of the college experience." They've gone out a couple times with people they know from classes or the dorm – even Amber and Ashley, once – but they haven't gone to a party party yet.
"But we're flying out tomorrow morning," Miley says.
"Exactly! And we need to celebrate the end of our first term at college and we aren't going to see each other for three weeks." Lilly's going to Atlanta to visit her mom for most of Christmas break, Miley back to Malibu.
The party's in a house off campus and it's ear-splitting loud even from outside. Inside it's packed and pounds with the energy of hundreds of college students freed from papers and exams. Lilly gets a red plastic cup full of beer from the skinny boy with tattooed forearms who's working the keg and takes it back to split with Miley, shielding her from view every time she drinks. College kids might not care about Miley being famous in the 'oh my god, I love you, can I have your autograph?' way, but it's a pretty safe bet they do in the 'hell yeah, I just scored two grand selling the tabloids pics of Hannah Montana drinking underage' one.
"Yeah, I guess that wouldn't be too good for your image," Lilly had said when Miley first brought up the issue.
Miley had stared at her. "Who cares about my image?" she said. "I'm worried about my dad."
It's their first real college party, and Lilly only means to drink a little, just for the experience, but it turns out it's really hard to tell how much you've been drinking when you're sharing a cup with someone else. And also? It's really hard to tell how much you've been drinking when you've been drinking.
The house is strung with colored Christmas lights. They blur and blink at Lilly as she stumbles through room after room, looking for Miley. Somehow Lilly lost her. But she found the kitchen and one of the girls in there made her a Long Island Ice Tea and it tasted so good after the beer Lilly had two. And now she's bringing one...half of one back to Miley, but Miley's gone.
Then there's a hand on her shoulder and Lilly tries to turn around but the room turns instead. Whoa. Rooms aren't supposed to do that. "Bad room," Lilly scolds.
"Lilly, are you okay?" It's Miley! Lilly found her!
"Miley! I thought I lost you!"
"You didn't lose me, I just went to the bathroom."
"Good," Lilly says. "I don't want to lose you. I brought you a present!" She holds up the half-empty cup.
Miley's eyes go all around to everyone except Lilly. "No thanks," she says. "I'm not drinking, remember?"
Oh yeah. They can't tell anyone else. It's a secret. "Don't worry – " Lilly winks at Miley, but then she doesn't think she did it right, so she does it again. " – I won't tell anyone your glasses are fake."
Miley laughs. "How much have you had to drink?"
Lilly tries to count on her fingers, but there's a problem. "What comes after five?" She used to know that! College is making her stupid!
"Okay, I think you need to sit down a minute. Come on, there's a couch over there." She takes the plastic cup from Lilly's hand and sets it down somewhere. "And we're gonna leave that here. You've definitely had enough."
Lilly waves bye-bye to her cup and Miley helps her across the room with an arm around her waist, which is really nice of her, because the room is still spinny because it's bad. When they get to the couch it jumps up to say hi to Lilly because it's a good couch and it's happy to see her so she doesn't even have to sit down because she already is. Miley is next to her and Lilly lays her head on Miley's shoulder. "I'm gonna take a nap."
"Oh, no," Miley says. "You are not passing out here. No passing out until we get back to the dorm. I'm not strong enough to haul you back unconscious."
"I love you," Lilly says. She loves Miley and she loves college and she loves this couch.
"I know," Miley says, patting her back.
"You know what? You know what else? I love your face." Lilly reaches up and pats it like Miley did her back, to show her how much. Miley pushes her hand down. "It's so...it's so..." It's really hard to think of the right word because she has to think of the right word because it's super important. "It's so face-y."
Miley laughs a little and pats her back again. "Seriously, how much did you drink?"
"I don't know. How much did you drink?"
"Not more than half that first beer."
"Oh." Lilly considers this. "Then..." She would try to count again but she can't remember where she put her fingers. "A lot."
"Hey, do you want to dance?"
Lilly rolls her face up from Miley's shoulder at the new voice. There's a guy there. A cute guy. His name is Cute Guy because he's cute.
"Uh..." Lilly holds her breath and waits to see what Miley answers. Eeney meeney Miley moe, she sings in her head. It makes her giggle and then hiccough and then her stomach hurts. "Thanks, but I can't leave her like this."
"It's cool. Some other time." Cute Guy leaves. Aww, Cute Guy. Lilly misses him. He was her friend like the couch.
She puts her cheek back on Miley's shoulder. "Millian," she whispers. She pokes Miley in the stomach. Hey! That's where her fingers are!
"Yes, Lillian?"
"I have to tell you something else."
"What's that?"
"I'm gonna throw up."
"Oh, boy. Hang on, Lilly. Don't do it yet, okay?" Miley is making her get up and go across the room but the room is bad and spinny and why is it so mean it should be nice like the couch because it's not nice to be mean. Lilly learned that in preschool. The room should go to preschool because they don't teach you not to be mean in college.
Then Lilly is leaning against a wall. It's a nice wall and Miley is yelling at people. Not yelling at people, but talking loud and fast like she always does when she's trying to get people to do something without thinking too much about what it is or why they should do it. But usually when Miley talks like that they have costumes and now they don't have costumes. Miley isn't even wearing her fake glasses.
Lilly really needs to puke.
"Okay, here we go," Miley says, her arm around Lilly again. "I got everyone out of the bathroom."
Lilly stumbles into it and falls to her knees in front of the toilet when Miley lets go of her to shut the door, and toilets are like couches they all went to preschool and learned how to share so Lilly starts throwing up and throwing up always makes her throw up so she throws up some more.
"Easy there, I gotcha." Miley gathers her hair back and her hands feel good, which is nice because Lilly still can't stop throwing up. Even after she finishes she still isn't done, retching up air because there's nothing in her stomach even though it really feels like there's something in there that doesn't want to be.
After she stops, Miley helps her sit against the bathtub and gives her water to rinse her mouth with and spit in the toilet. "Feel better?" she asks.
Lilly groans.
"Well, I guess we can check this one off the college experience list. You're going to regret this when we have to get up at six tomorrow to get to the airport." She lets Lilly have more water and this time Lilly doesn't spit it out. It feels good on her throat. "I think we'd better get you back to the dorm before you pass out or throw up again."
Lilly shakes her head and it makes the bathroom go spinny. The room from before is a bad influence on it. "It's too far away. I can't do it."
"I'll help you." Miley takes her hands and pulls her up and Lilly leans into Miley and tries to get her arms to work so she can hug her.
"I'm so glad you're here," she says. She's so glad it makes her want to cry.
Miley's arms work a lot better than Lilly's and she hugs Lilly tight. "I wouldn't miss it for anything," she says, and most people? They'd just be saying that. But with Miley, Lilly knows it's true.
—
spring
There'd been a few paparazzi the first couple weeks of school in the fall, and of course Miley had done interviews over the break about her decision to go to college and how she's adjusting, etc., etc. That got people interested again, so the paparazzi follow her back to Stanford in January. There aren't many of them, it's too far a drive, and while campus security tries to run them off when they see them, Miley just smiles and waves. An eighteen-year-old popstar on her way to class or the dining hall doesn't quite sell magazines like an eighteen-year-old popstar caught in a sex or drug scandal, so she figures they'll be gone before Friday and they are.
Fall term she'd just taken some of the gen ed required classes, but this one she signs up for a couple music classes. Music has been a part of her whole life, a huge part, and she knows music and she's had vocal coaches. But she's never studied it like this before, academically, and now she has textbooks that say things like This has pushed the very definition of music beyond the traditional European conception of music as a pattern of notes toward a conception of music as organized sound and she loves it.
They have an hour-long discussion in class about whether or not that means Girl Talk is a musical artist, which ends when someone says she can't believe he hasn't been sued yet and everyone turns around and looks at Miley. "I've never sued anyone in my life," she tells them. "And I don't plan to start with him."
One of her classes studies early American popular composers and she drives Lilly crazy playing Irving Berlin for a week straight. "How can you stand this stuff?" Lilly cries on Tuesday night.
"It's so peppy!" Miley says. "Doesn't it make you happy?"
"Miley, she's singing about insurance fraud and adultery."
"But cheerfully."
Lilly groans and covers her head with her pillow and Miley regards her thoughtfully. "I think I'll do a cover of Always on my next album. As a present for you."
"Please no," Lilly says through the pillow.
"But, Lilly, you always understand when the things I've planned need a helping hand."
Lilly lifts the pillow off her face. "You know, now that you don't have the Hannah secret anymore, I have a whole pile of embarrassing Miley photos that are just waiting to hit the internet."
"You never let me have any fun," Miley pouts.
"That is completely untrue."
"I'm listening to this music for the rest of college."
"Also completely untrue."
Miley holds out for another three days, but then Lilly threatens to put in a request to transfer to another room and she has to give in. Truthfully, it's been driving her crazy too, and besides they've already moved on to Scott Joplin in class.
Amber's in all her music classes, and Miley can't tell if it's because Amber's trying to suck up to her or because she's honestly interested. But Amber's not as bad when she's trying to get on your good side instead of torment you. She's just a nuisance, something that's always hovering and buzzing in the background, like a mosquito or Jackson.
Amber and Ashley are around so much, she and Lilly both start to get used to them, and the only thing that's really annoying is having to listen to the comments they make about everyone else. Then one day Miley realizes she's been dealing with Amber like she's still just Miley instead of Hannah too. So she makes Amber stop.
It seems like it's April before Miley can even blink and there's only a month left in the term. She and Lilly go to more parties, but Lilly is always careful not to drink as much as she did that first time. Once, though, Lilly gets a little bottle of vodka from Amber and the two of them drink it in their room, mixing it with orange juice and Sprite. Lilly says she feels bad that Miley never gets to drink at parties, even though Miley doesn't really care. Miley thinks it's not so much the drinking itself Lilly feels bad about as it is there's something fun and college-y she can do that Miley can't.
Half the bottle is gone and Miley's on her back on the bed, hanging her head upside down over the edge. Her brain is flipping around inside her skull and it needs more room. "This is so weird," she whispers.
"Shhh," Lilly says. It might have been a really loud whisper. Lilly's sitting at her desk. She has her chin propped on it and she's staring glumly at the different drink containers lined up on it. "This is a lot more fun when you're at a party."
"We should do something!" Miley says. She tries to roll over onto her stomach so she can get up from the bed, but then somehow she keeps rolling and ends up falling off it and hitting the floor on her hands and knees. "Whoa." She uses the bed to steady herself and stand, then sways in place for a minute when she lets it go. This would be a lot easier if the floor didn't keep moving. But Miley outsmarts it and stumbles over to the open window. "We should go out!"
"Noooo," says Lilly, shaking her head. "We can't go out, remember? That's why we're in here."
"Oh, yeah," Miley says. She puts her hand on the window screen. It's dark out, but there are lights along the sidewalks and she can see people walking around. A light breeze cools her palm. The screen feels funny on her hand and Miley pushes harder against it. Then suddenly her feet trip forward and Miley's face smushes onto glass and her hand is way, way outside with the breeze all around it. She has no idea what just happened.
"Miley, you broke the screen!" Lilly hisses.
Oh, that's what happened. Miley giggles. That's actually kind of funny. She waves her hand at the people outside and laughs some more. It's actually...it's really actually...actually it's really funny. She laughs so much she has to sit down on the floor.
"This isn't funny!" Lilly says. Lilly has never understood Miley's sense of humor. But Miley doesn't stop laughing and finally Lilly is laughing too so she gets it because it's really actually funny.
Laughing makes Miley's stomach ache. She stops and then can't remember why she started. Why is she sitting on the floor? They're supposed to be having fun! "We should do something here if we can't go out." She's very proud of herself for figuring that out.
"Like what?" Lilly says.
Oh. Is she supposed to think of that too? Geez, Miley always has to do everything. "We can play a game. The kind with the drinking." Because they have things to drink!
But Lilly shakes her head. "I can't drink any more. I'll throw up. And I'm not throwing up."
"You think of something then," Miley pouts. Lilly never likes Miley's ideas. Miley's genius is so unappreciated.
"We could play Truth or Dare."
Wow. Lilly is really bad at thinking of things. "We already know everything," Miley points out. "And we're stuck in here." They can't do any good dares stuck in a dorm room.
"Spin the bottle?" Lilly suggests.
Miley looks to see what the bottle could land on. "I'm not making out with Beary Bear," she says.
"I can't believe you brought Beary Bear to college."
"He didn't want to miss anything!"
Lilly opens her mouth, and then she looks at the window and at the room and at Miley and shuts it again. "I'm sorry," she says. Her face is all sad now. No no no no no. Miley doesn't want Lilly to be sad. Only happy forever.
"You shouldn't be sorry. You should be happy." Miley smiles really big at her for an example.
Lilly shakes her head again. "I am sorry. Because if you were in Paris you could be out at a real party having fun right now instead of being in this stupid dorm room with me." Lilly thinks Paris would have been parties and glamour and fun. But it wouldn't have been. It wasn't.
Miley scrambles up from the floor and over to her desk. She opens up her laptop and starts some music playing, loud and fast and pulsing like a heart.
"What are you doing?" Lilly asks, gaping at her.
Miley holds out a hand. "We can have our own real party right here." Lilly lets Miley pull her up and then they're dancing, dancing, and they dance all over the room and Miley only almost falls once and Lilly not at all. And Lilly's happy and smiling and Miley's glad because Lilly shouldn't be sad and she shouldn't be sorry. Miley's the one who should be sorry.
She remembers Lilly telling her how nervous she was that Miley would bail on her for a world tour or a movie, and Miley wishes she could go back and make it so that worry had never come true, change things so there wasn't even a minute when Lilly believed that there were things more important to Miley than her. She wants to go back and fix things so that she'd turned down that movie first thing. Because maybe, maybe if Miley hadn't been going to leave Lilly, Lilly wouldn't have left her.
—
Campus is practically deserted. Lilly runs over to Lakeside after her Humanities final to get something to eat, and it's so obvious that the only people still here are the ones who have exams left. Lilly's got one more this afternoon and then she's done, but she's sticking around because Miley is one of the unlucky ones who has an exam scheduled for the last slot, next Monday morning.
She grabs a salad because it's easy and she won't have to worry about it getting cold while she crams for Calc between bites. She really thought she was done with math when she graduated high school, but Stanford requires at least one semester because of something they call disciplinary breadth. So far Lilly hasn't met anyone under the age of thirty who can say those words with a straight face.
She's just gotten to the right place in her notes when her phone goes off with a text from Joannie that just says, wtf. Lilly considers sending back a question mark, but she figures this'll be over faster if she calls.
"What's this bull about you not being in Malibu this summer?" Joannie says when she answers. Lilly had updated her status about it this morning before her exam.
"Hey, Joannie."
"Well?"
"Miley's doing that tour."
"And?"
"I'm going with her."
"Wait," Joannie deadpans. "Hang on. I'm so shocked I need to sit down."
Lilly rolls her eyes. "Well what do you expect me to do? She wants me to go and I kind of owe her. I mean, she's putting her career on hold so we can go to college together."
"Yeah, an eight-week sold-out tour really makes it sound like her career's suffering."
"You know what I mean."
"Yeah, you mean you two are totally co-dependent on each other."
Lilly laughs. "We are not!" She picks up her fork and pushes the salad around. "We're just best friends."
"I've got friends too, Truscott. That doesn't mean I plan my life around them."
"We don't – "
"Why is Miley at Stanford again?"
"She wanted to go to college with me," Lilly mutters.
"With you," Joannie says. "She's not there because she needs a freaking English degree. She needs you. That's why she gave up a multimillion dollar movie deal. She got there and she realized she couldn't do it without you."
Lilly lets her fork drop. She isn't sure she likes what Joannie's saying. She loves Miley, and she loves that Miley came back so they could go to college together, and she knows Miley loves her. But to say that they need each other...That sounds different, somehow. Much more desperate and final. "That wasn't it. She just knows we won't get another chance at college together."
"Whatever," Joannie says, clearly done talking about Miley. "I'm just pissed you're bailing on me for the whole summer."
Lilly moves her head, trying to change gears and shake the rest of the conversation out of it. "You could come on the tour." She doesn't really want Joannie on the tour, and Miley would probably kill her if she knew Lilly was offering, but Lilly only does it because she's ninety-five percent sure Joannie will say –
"Ew. Two months of twenty-four/seven Stewart? Pass." Lilly will never admit it, but she kind of likes how much Joannie doesn't like Miley. It's nice to know that Joannie is friends with her because she likes her, not because she's trying to suck up to Lilly to get to Miley. Not that Lilly can't tell when someone's doing that and shut it down pretty quick, and not that it's happened all that much, but still. The times it did were enough. And compared to that, Joannie's dislike of Miley can be refreshing.
"Besides, I've been in freaking North Carolina the past nine months," Joannie continues. "This summer I'm going to be glued to the beach."
"I'll be in Malibu some in August. We should go surfing. Play a hockey game or something."
"Sure," Joannie agrees. "Just leave Stewart at home."
Then again, sometimes it can be kind of annoying how she and Miley don't get along. "No promises. Look, I've got an exam in an hour, so..."
"Good luck. See you in August."
Lilly hangs up and tries to go back to her Calc notes, but now she's distracted, and really she should have just texted Joannie back instead of calling. So what if Miley needs her, she decides. So what if Lilly needs Miley? That just means they love each other. That just means they're best friends. And okay, Lilly knows not every best friend relationship is like theirs. But it's not their fault they love each other so much. They're just lucky that they both have someone who's always there, who'll do anything for them, who they love more than anyone.
Lilly sucks in a breath and huffs it out. She really can't think about this right now. She has an exam in less than an hour.
—
summer
Eight weeks, twelve cities, hundreds of thousands of screaming fans. It might not be a major Hollywood movie with Spielberg and Cruise, but it's nice work if you can get it. Lilly shouts herself hoarse every night and Miley teases her about it constantly. "I'm the one who's supposed to lose her voice, you know. I'm the one doing all the work."
It's kinda sad, but the tour bus actually seems roomy after their dorm. They share the little room at the back of one of the buses, because otherwise one of them would be relegated to one of the bunks, which have absolutely no privacy or changing space or even a mirror.
Being on the road is fun at first. They get breakfast out every morning and grab lunches on the go and Lilly watches Miley rehearse. She calls Oliver and they talk for hours about which is more boring, the landscape between D.C. and Philadelphia or the road between Chicago and Detroit, and how many times in a row you can go to McDonalds before you get sick of their fries. Lilly says seven. Oliver says it's not possible to get sick of McDonalds fries. Miley says don't you two have anything better to talk about, and anyway it depends on if the fries are hot and have enough salt on them.
By the third week, most of the excitement's worn off. They're all tired of the bus, tired of having to get on it as soon as a show is done, tired of only getting off it to put on another one, just tired. Lilly feels cramped all the time, even with the wide-open landscapes rolling past her window, and she start dreaming about vegetables that aren't lettuce. And the concerts are amazing, but they all demand an obscene level of energy and they can't ever rest, really, not on the road, on the bus. Even the hotels get old.
This is when Lilly sees how much Miley loves what she does, because you have to love it all the way through to keep going like this, day after day, week after week. She knew it already, she'd seen it already, the lengths Miley went to with Hannah, but it feels different now, because now Hannah is gone. Because this is the future, this is Miley's life, and Lilly doesn't know how much longer she'll get to be a part of it.
During rehearsals, she spends a lot of time hanging out with Miley's dad. Except instead of hanging out, it's more like sitting next to him in front of the stage while he talks on his phone, which he does constantly. She listens to his side of about a million conversations while watching Miley and the backup dancers run through the choreography. That's just what they're doing late one Friday morning. They got into the city last night and usually wouldn't have to rehearse until this afternoon, but there was a slight problem at the last show Miley did in Columbus with the part where she's supposed to get lowered from the ceiling, so they're practicing that like crazy today to make sure it'll work on this stage.
They've been here a couple hours already and Lilly's finished the coffee she brought with her, but Mr. Stewart hasn't even gotten to touch his because every time he reaches for it, his phone rings again. He finally hangs up and takes a big gulp from his cup, then makes a face at how cold it is. "I guess it's just as well," he says, putting down the coffee and picking the phone back up. "If this thing's not ringing, that means I need to start on the two-mile list of people I have to call."
"Maybe I could help," Lilly suggests, because really, she's bored. She's seen the show a hundred times already, and even when she hadn't rehearsals were still boring. Plus it's really sad when coffee goes to waste. She's a college student. If there's one thing she knows, that's it. "I could call people if you want a break."
He looks at her for so long and with such an odd expression on his face that she starts to backpedal. "Or not. I mean, it was just an idea. I don't have to call anyone. But I could at least, like, answer yours when it rings and be all, 'Robby Stewart's phone, please hold' and maybe that way you could actually drink some of your coffee before it forms an ice cube."
"Lilly," he says slowly. He's got this smile that Lilly doesn't really like because it's the same one Miley gets right before she starts talking Lilly into doing some kind of crazy plan that never works out in the end. "You're a genius."
"Oh," Lilly says, a little confused about why, exactly. The man must really love his coffee. "Okay."
"I have to call this radio station in Boston about setting up an interview while we're there. They've been hounding me about setting a firm date, but I haven't gotten a chance to call them back." He hands her his phone. "Why don't you do it?"
"Wow. Okay." That seems like kind of a big deal. She'd been thinking about starting off with something a little smaller. But Boston, they're there in three weeks, and it would probably be better to do it in the morning, and they get in on a Wednesday, so it'll have to be either Thursday or Friday. Lilly doesn't know what else they have scheduled. "Uh, is Thursday better? Or Friday?"
"Friday," he says, smiling even more. It's starting to make her nervous. "They'll want Thursday, because it's before the first concert and they're giving away two tickets, but Friday's better for us."
That makes her even more nervous – she doesn't want to argue with anyone – but she volunteered for this, didn't she? "What's the number?"
He pulls it up for her and she calls and when someone picks up on the other end she blanks out for a minute, no idea what to say, but then her brain kicks in and she's saying, "This is Lilly Truscott, I'm calling on behalf of Miley Stewart." It's pretty easy from there, although it probably helps that people are willing to do basically anything to get Miley. Mr. Stewart listens carefully the whole way through that first call, nodding his head.
"That was so cool," Lilly breathes when she hangs up. It's a lot more fun to actually be doing something instead of just sitting and watching, and it makes her feel important, knowing that she's helping.
The next week he lets her make a few more calls and listens in, and after that she calls from her own phone because he's on his at the same time, doing other stuff and not even paying attention to what she says. It's really cool that he trusts her that much, and she won't admit it, but she loves how people stutter and then scramble around bending over backwards when she tells them who she's calling for.
One day she gets off the phone with Good Morning, America – Good Morning, America – because Miley's doing an interview and a concert as part of their summer concert series when they're in New York, and one of the guys in the crew comes around asking what they all want for lunch. So Lilly and Mr. Stewart tell him what they want and then Mr. Stewart says, "I'll have to wait and ask Miley next time they have a break."
But Lilly remembers how last night she and Miley were talking about how awesome the turkey sandwiches at Banner are, so she says, "No, she wants a turkey sandwich. With lettuce, tomatoes, pickles, and honey mustard. No mayo. On wheat." Miley would rather have white, but Lilly thinks she needs to be eating healthier. They've had way too much fast food on the road.
The crew guy just kind of blinks at her. "You heard the lady," Mr. Stewart says, and crew guy starts a little and scribbles down what Lilly said and scurries away. And then when lunch comes Miley makes this happy noise and says, "This is exactly what I wanted, how did you guys know? Wheat, though?"
And Lilly says, "You need to eat healthier." Miley gives her a look, but Lilly gives her one right back, and that's the end of that.
Except then people are always asking her what Miley wants for lunch. And not just lunch, they keep asking her all kinds of questions that start with, "What does Ms. Stewart want us to...?" or, "Do you think we can...?" or, "Would it be all right if we change...?" At first, Lilly just answers, but then she realizes that these are the kind of questions they're really supposed to be asking Mr. Stewart, not her. So the next time someone comes to her with a question, Lilly says, "You should probably ask her dad."
The woman sighs. "Yeah," she says. "But it's a lot faster to ask you."
"What are you talking about?" Lilly says.
"If we ask Mr. Stewart, most of the time he just tells us he'll have to check with Miley," the woman explains. "But if we ask you, we get an answer. And it's always right."
Lilly thinks about that for a while, because on the one hand, she can see how that's faster, but on the other hand, she doesn't want Mr. Stewart to think she thinks she can just do whatever she wants without checking with him. Then she asks him about it. "Do you know how much more peaceful my life is without everybody yapping at me about every little thing all the time?" he says.
She checks with Miley after that, just to make sure Miley's not mad that Lilly's making all these decisions for her. Miley rolls her eyes. "Are you kidding?" she says. "Why would I be mad at you for making things easier for me?" So that's all right, and Lilly doesn't really mind people asking her things. She likes to feel involved.
And she is, kind of a lot, between that and the phone calls, even if they're just to schedule things and she figures out really quickly that those kinds of calls are small potatoes and Mr. Stewart is still handling all the big stuff himself. Like the movie deal he spends a lot of time talking to people about. He finally gets tired of Lilly asking him about the details of Miley's schedule, so he sets it up so that she can log into it on her phone and see what's there and even add stuff if she needs to. "What do all the colors mean?" she asks him, paging through it.
"Green is tentative, black is confirmed but it can be changed if necessary."
"What about red?" she says, looking at the entry for the concert in two days.
"That stuff's set in stone." Which makes sense, because all the concerts are in red, except once she gets to September it's all just one big red block labeled SCHOOL W/LILLY. Her throat gets kind of tight seeing that and she has to swallow to open it up. She pages back into the summer and notices something else.
"She's recording an album after the tour? Isn't that a lot to do in a month?"
"Yeah, but we've worked with all these people before, and Miley knows the songs already, so we'll get it done. Plus, you'll be gone."
"What does that have to do with anything?" Lilly asks.
He chuckles. "It means she'll actually want to be in the studio all day instead of hanging out at the beach or the mall with you."
"Oh," she says, thinking about how they had school all year, and then straight into the tour, and then apparently into the studio after that, and is she the only one who cares if Miley actually gets to relax every once in a while and everyone else is perfectly fine with her being worked to death? So she decides right then that as soon as she gets back from Atlanta, she's dragging Miley away from the studio and out to the beach or the movies every single chance she gets. Joannie will just have to suck it up.
That night they're back on the bus, heading for Boston. Lilly tries to sleep, but 95 is in horrible condition and it seems like they can't go half a mile without hitting a pothole. After a while she turns on her side and puts her hand on Miley's shoulder. It's warm and Lilly moves her thumb in little circles. "Miley?"
"What?" Miley whines. "I was almost asleep."
"I just wanted to say thank you."
"For what?" Miley asks.
"You know."
"Okay." The word comes out on a long exhale of breath and Lilly is pretty sure Miley's mostly asleep and has no idea what Lilly's talking about. Lilly inches forward and presses a kiss next to Miley's ear anyway. Miley squirms. "Go away, I'm sleeping."
"Sorry," Lilly says, but she doesn't move away. Instead she puts her head down on Miley's pillow, leaves her hand curled on Miley's shoulder, and whispers thank you one more time before she falls asleep.
—
By the time the tour ends, Miley's exhausted. A month's vacation before going back to school would be really nice, so it's too bad she has to head straight into the studio as soon as they're in Malibu. But there's not really any way around it, since she needs to get the bulk of her next album recorded. The label's pushing for a release next summer, and she recorded a single last Christmas and another over spring break, but this is the longest chunk of uninterrupted time she's going to have between now and then.
She'd thought it was hard juggling her career and school during high school, but at least then she'd been less than an hour from the city. It's not really possible to record an album over two months' worth of weekends if you have to drive six hours each way.
But being in the studio isn't so bad. It's a lot more laid back than being on tour, and even though they're really working hard to get things done, it seems like she actually has time to breathe. Getting to go home every night and sleep in her own bed helps a lot, too. And Lilly's in Atlanta, so Miley's glad to have something to keep her busy. And, like, she has other friends, because hello. Superstar. But Oliver's out of town and so is Jesse, and does she really need to spend more than a few hours a month with Traci? No, she doesn't. She'd much rather be in the studio.
It's been about two weeks and they're driving home one night when her dad says, "Mile, there's something I need to talk to you about."
"Jackson's moving out?"
"No." Then he frowns. "Well, yes. Eventually. Lord, I hope so. But this has nothing to do with him. I got an offer the other day that I think you'd be real interested in."
That perks Miley way up, and she's all set to pump him for the details of whatever the project is, but then she realizes that he doesn't sound like he's about to deliver good news. He sounds more like he's debating whether he should have told her there was news at all. And she's pretty sure she knows why. "But..."
"But it would interfere with school."
Miley takes a breath and holds it a second, then says, "Turn it down."
"You don't even want to know what it is?"
"No." Part of her is screaming yes, screaming Spielberg and Tom Cruise. But she already walked away from Spielberg and Tom Cruise, and whatever this is, she would walk away from it. She's not doing anything that interferes with college. She won't do that to Lilly. Or to herself.
It's just easier if she doesn't have to know what she's missing.
"You're su—"
"Yes. Turn it down." Even though she knows it has to be big for him to even bring it up, because he knows she's doing college.
"All right. I'll let them know." There's a tricky bit of traffic and her dad has to pay attention to his driving for a few minutes, but once things smooth out he says, "You know, I don't think I ever told you how proud I am of you for what you're doing, bud. It's a good thing. I'm so proud that you've grown up to be someone who can do something so unselfish."
He looks over at her but Miley turns her head to face out the window so she doesn't have to meet his eyes. She wishes he'd just let this drop. Because if she was really unselfish, she wouldn't have ever taken the Spielberg offer, would she? She wouldn't have asked Lilly to put off college for her, and when Lilly couldn't, she wouldn't have gotten on that plane. But she'd done all those thing. She'd gone to Paris. She hadn't known until she got there how alone she would be without Lilly.
"I mean it. You're becoming a wonderful young woman and I really am very proud of you."
She hates it when he's proud of her for something she doesn't deserve. Because even now, she wants to know what the offer is. Even now, she doesn't trust herself to say no if she did know. "It's nothing," she says. "There'll be other things to do after college."
"There will," he says, nodding. "But it's not nothing. I know it means a lot to Lilly."
Miley fidgets a little in her seat. "Well, Lilly means a lot to me."
"I know she does. And the trick to this business is that you can't ever let it make you lose sight of what's really important. When you find those things, you've got to hold onto them. But I guess I don't have to tell you that, do I?"
She thinks about that for a while. "Daddy? I want to add another song to the album."
He whistles. "I don't think we're gonna have time. We're cutting it close as it is."
"I'll record it at Christmas then. Or spring break. Just as long as it's on the album."
"Well, if it's that important to you, I'm sure we can work something out. This something new?"
"No," she says. "Something old."
—
Yeah, yeah, I know, I know. Stanford's on quarters. But this story is long enough already omg.
Five chapters, one up per day. See y'all tomorrow.