This is just a little snip-it prior to City of Fallen Angels. It's short, but I had it on my computer and didn't want it to go to complete waste.
"When did you first know?" Jace asked. His lips were a faint pink, chapped. When they moved – just enough to release a whisper – they bled slightly. Even under the dimness, his eye shone its usual color: a genuine, honest gold.
Alec turned his back to him, and took to staring out his window. He watched the cars move below the institute, rushing by and beeping at whomever dared to slow them down. Lights flickered over his eyelashes, laminating the darkness in places; the cold drafts made goosebumps creep over and up his arms and send shivers down his back. Hairs stood on his neck.
"When I was twelve," he answered. He meant to speak louder, just so Jace could hear him across the room, but he was sure it came out in a whisper - a faint, placental whisper. Maybe even an awkward cry.
Alec cringed. He really did not want to talk to Jace – not then. Not about that. It wasn't that didn't trust him; he'd always trust Jace. He'd trust him with his life; his deepest, darkest secrets – and even his pride. He was his Parabatai, after all. But – talking about that, to him, was just plain awkward and weird.
Alec heard the creak of the institute floor, footsteps, and the whine of his bed frame. Jace spoke to his back, "right away?" he questioned, "just like that?"
"Not really," Alec answered. "I mean – I don't know," he stuttered. From the cold, or from Jace's back gaze, he did not know. He traced the windowsill with his fingertips, collecting the dust. "You were always my friend. My brother. I always liked you," he said, louder then – more confident. "But things just… changed. I knew what I wanted." He stopped, sudden. Air was gone from his lungs, crushed like a soda can.
"And it wasn't what others thought you would want," Jace finished. "Maryse and Robert, mostly."
"Yes," Alec answered.
"And I started dating girls," Jace continued, "Izzy started dating guys."
"And I did nothing." Alec picked the dust out from under his nails, and walked over to the pile of books on his nightstand. He picked one up, and flipped through it – lost in thought. Distracted. "Mom tried," he said, "Dad tried to talk to me."
Alec turned around, and looked at Jace – right in the eyes. The words he said echoed off the walls, an eerie cry. One that was supposed to have fallen from his lips years before, but decided to creep through just then. "I tried."
Jace scoffed. "Idiot. You can't change that, can you?" The mattress screeched as he leaned back, arms behind his head. Alec couldn't see his facial expression.
"No," Alec said. "I can't help it."
Jace snorted. "I can understand that." Mostly because he thought he and his sister loved each other… in a not-so-normal way. "But I don't get you. You had someone – someone who loved you, and you loved back – but you pushed him away. How could you?"
"I don't know," Alec answered. "But I could say the same thing about Clary."
"What?"
"Clary," Alec repeated, "Clary and Simon."
"Oh." Jace sat up. "I guess –" he continued, but was cut off by the ringing in Alec's pocket. It was a slight, simple tune – but in the dimness and quiet of the room, it startled his train of thought. He watched, careful, as Alec pulled his cell phone out of his pocket and opened it.
"Hello?" Alec sounded hoarse.
Jace couldn't make out what the voice on the opposite end was saying, but he knew it was Magnus. He could tell by the slight smile that played on Alec's lips, the slight vacancy of his eyes – as if he were somewhere else – not in a dark room, talking angst. Somewhere where he was completely stress-free.
Alec closed the phone, and put it back into his pocket. "It was Magnus," he said.
"I know," Jace answered. He got off of the bed, walked across the room, and picked up Alec's bag. "Here," he said.
"Thanks." Alec paused for a moment. With a faint thump, the bag was on the floor, and his hands on Jace's shoulders. He squeezed them tight. "Don't get yourself killed," he said, "not while I'm gone."
"Don't worry," Jace answered. "I have Clary, now, remember?" He smiled. "Just go have some fun."
Alec smiled back. "I think I will."
