/
/
/
Lorne stepped down from the ladder, and looked at the banner he had hung up.
"Do you think it's too much?" he asked the foreman
"Grand Re-Reopening?" the Foreman asked, "Uh…yeah, I think people will get it."
"Good to know," Lorne said
"But that bouncer of yours, I'm not so sure about."
"Oh, he's harmless."
"Yeah, but who bleaches their hair, in this day and age?"
/
Later…
/
The opening was a success; several patrons were inside, among them an interesting gang of space-smugglers. Mal, Zoe, and Jayne were drinking, Kaylee was attempting to get Simon to sing, and River was attempting Karaoke.
"This waiting round is killing me," she sang, her eyes darting from the machine to the audience, "She drives me crazy, like no one else…"
Simon gave Kaylee an angry look.
"I swear, she picked out the song herself," she groaned
"Barkeep," Mal called, "Another pint of ale."
The bartender passed it to him.
"That's twelve credits ninety-five," the bartender said
Lorne slid in next to the captain.
"We don't get many of you rough-and-tumble space bandits in here," Lorne admitted
"Not surprising, at these prices," Mal replied
"Hah!" Lorne laughed, "That one never gets old!"
Mal turned to Lorne, and almost fell out of his seat. The Pylean's appearance surprised him.
"You're…" he began
"I'm a demon," Lorne explained, "Not an alien."
"A demon?"
"Yeah, creature from hell. Most of us, even the vampires, went back to our respective dimensions after the Alliance cracked down on the supernatural."
"So you're anti-Alliance?"
"Pretty much. But I like to remain neutral."
"Well…I'm sorry, what was your name?"
"Call me The Host."
"OK, Host, what does a Demon need with a karaoke bar?"
"I can read people when they're singing," Lorne explained
"Read…people?" Mal asked
"Yeah. You know, tell their future, their destiny…"
"Can you read River?"
"The girl? Sure."
Lorne focused on her.
"Wow," he grinned, "That girl is going places. A few obstacles in the way, but she'll get there in one piece."
"Huh," Mal nodded, "Sounds right. Can you do me?"
"I'd need a couple of seabreezes."
"What?"
"Nothing. I can read you, but you have to sing."
/
A pint of liquid courage later…
/
"Because I can't smile without you!" Mal sang, "I can't laugh! And I can't think! I'm finding it hard to do anything! Because I feel sad when you're sad!"
Serenity's crew looked on nervously.
"What is he thinking?" Jayne groaned
"I think the song's kinda pretty," Kaylee admitted
/
Mal finished the song, and went back to Lorne.
"See?" Lorne asked, "That wasn't so hard, was it?"
"Says you," Mal wiped the sweat off his brow, "So what can you tell me?"
"Well…" Lorne exhaled heavily, "Mal, you're in for some trials and tribble-ations."
"You mean tribulations?"
"Right. Sorry, Star Trek marathon on the sci-fi wave last night. Anyway, things pretty much work out for you."
"That's all? Can't you tell me anything more?"
"My hands are tied by the powers-that-be. But, uh, between you and me…"
Lorne leaned in closer to Mal.
"Just tell Inara you're sorry."
"But she started it!" Mal groaned
"Mal…" Lorne sighed
"Fine, I'll tell her tomorrow," Mal grumbled
/
The crew took off. Mal paid for the drinks.
"We'll tell all our friends," Mal assured
"Cool."
/
Closing time…
/
"Well, as far as grand openings go, we did pretty good," the bartender said, counting his tips
"Yeah," Lorne nodded, "I think we should look into doing a theme night. Maybe something like…"
There was a knock on the window. Lorne turned to see a spiky-haired man in a leather coat standing outside. In the rain.
"Lorne!" the guy called, "Please let me in?"
Lorne tapped on a sign that said "No Angel's".
"Sorry, buddy, rules are rules," he said
"But you let in Angel Chan-To!"
"It says no ANGELS! We're allowed to have one!"
Angel silently mulled over the logic.
"Damn it…" he muttered, walking away