He ran a fingerless gloved hand through his unkempt dark hair. I could have sworn I saw a bit of dust brush off him as he scratched his head. Usually I would be repulsed by someone so filthy. But Christophe's rugged, dirty appearance seemed to fit him perfectly. His dirty, tight fitting dark clothes fit snugly on his toned sun kissed skin. I wondered how hard he works to maintain that chiseled body.
When I had first met this young man, I had instantly disliked him. He was arrogant, boorish and rude. He smoked and I have always hated the smell of smoke. And to top it all off, he was French. But as I got to know him, I realized that he was much more then a smoking Frenchmen. He was funny, nice and very alluring. I found myself being drawn to him.
Right now, we were talking outside the school. He was telling me jokes and making me laugh. I always had fun with him. I wished we could spend more time together. A long silence fell over us. Our eyes met awkwardly.
He stared down at me longingly while I stared back at him with desire in my eyes. He looked like he was about to lean forward, then hesitated. Was he going to kiss me? I wondered. I felt my face grow hot. From behind him, someone called his name. I could not see who it was over his broad shoulders. He looked over at them and nodded, saying that he would be right there. He looked back at me and sighed.
"I must go." He told me, his french accent having a dejected tone laced into it. I watched with a heavy heart as he turned around and walked toward his lover, Gregory. I watched Gregory grab Christophe's thick arm and drag him away. I didn't know if I was just going daft or if I really did see Gregory glance over his shoulder at me and glare. Either way I still felt that horrible ping in my chest.
Of course not. I thought bitterly. Why would he kiss me when he was with a beautiful man like Gregory? That's when I felt a harsh tug on my arm. I looked up to see Damien glaring down at me."Come on." He demanded harshly, pulling my arm almost violently. I obediently followed Damien as he pulled my arm as he walked. Damien was my current lover. He could be so cold sometimes. I couldn't help but wonder if Christophe would be this rough with me?
I shook my head at that, trying to clear my mind of such silly thoughts. I have to stop thinking about him. I have to come to grips with the reality that he and I will never be together! I am doomed to live the rest of my life with this demon and the fact that I never had the courage to even tell him how I feel. That is the path fate has chosen for me and I must deal with it, despite my broken heart.