Caught Between Two Worlds
Moiraine lay awake in her make shift shelter covered with sticks and leaves. She could not sleep, for who could sleep when there was still much to do, but there was no way to contribute. She was trapped. Trapped in a world that Lanfear pulled her into, the door was sealed, there was no way out. Moiraine contemplated her pervious actions before her decision to do away with the evil that was Lanfear.
She knew of course that this would be her fate, but in reality it was still a hard truth to swallow. As for Lanfear, Moiraine sometimes came across her sulking in the shadows while wandering the land for food. Moiraine knew of course that being here was not Lanfear's intention. She figured Lanfear wanted to be rewarded for her death and be one of the great rulers with the Dark One. Little did Lanfear know good always prevails over evil.
Long ago in another life Moiraine was informed that the darkness would fade and light would cover the lands again, but there would be a mass war and great devastation would take place before the resolution.
Moiraine...like a melody drifting on the wind she heard her name. Moiraine sat up on her cot and checked her surroundings. Moiraine... the tone was more urgent. Moiraine come to me! A command that she could not refuse.
Moiraine stood up and walked outside of her hut. This was ludicrous she vaguely thought. Who would be calling her name when the only other resident on this light forsaken land was Lanfear!
As she walked outside of her hut she could see a figure standing in the distance beckoning her to come nearer. In her mind she could hear and feel the urgency of the stranger and the power too. Moiraine picked up her pace for she could not wait to see the identity of the mystery figure. As she drew nearer she could make out the form of a woman. From what Moiraine could gather the woman was in command of Saidar the female half of the One Power.
In the light of the twin moons the figure was finally revealed. Moiraine's breathe hitched, tears welled in her eyes for it was the very one that had haunted her dreams since she came here.
Egwene rushed toward Moiraine, she had finally found her! Lounging at the other woman in a tight embrace Egwene could feel Moiraine stiffen, before giving into the contact.
"Are you real or a figment of my imagination?" Moiraine whispered into Egwene's hair. "Tell me I need to know! Are you real?" More softly now Moiraine breathed, "does this mean I can leave now?"
Egwene's heart broke into a thousand pieces; this was not the cool collected Aes Sedai that Egwene had met many years before in Edmonds Field. This woman was different, softer, scared and desperate. Egwene stretched out her arms gently pushing Moiraine away so that she could get a better look at the woman before her.
Her dress was tattered, her hair was wild and in tangles, her face was smudged and most devastating of all, her eyes had the scared look of a lost child desperately hoping to be found.
Moiraine's eyes were pleading now, "well are you going to answer me or are you going to stand there all night looking me over?" Her eyes were now threatening to spill over. When did she get so weak? Moiraine hated herself for this display.
Gently Egwene brushed a stray lock of hair out of Moiraine's face. Sighing heavily Egwene replied, "as of now I am only walking in a dream. I am here half in the physical and half in spirit. With the aid of the Angre'al I can do this. I have been searching for you for some time now. " Egwene broke eye contact with Moiraine, for if she were to look into those pleading eyes while she said this then she would surely break down. "But I cannot take you back..."
At that Moiraine fell to the ground and put her face in her hands. "Then why did you come? To taunt me, to tell me that I am lost while you still prance around in the upper world?" Egwene kneeled down beside Moiraine and put her hand on the other woman's shoulder. Moiraine shrugged her off. "Why are you here?" Egwene could tell that Moiraine's tears were now running more freely.
Egwene bent forward and gently kissed Moiraine's brow. Leaning back she sighed, "I came because I believe there may still be a way to save you. Thom has said as much. He believes he will be the one to rescue you." Egwene stroked Moiraine's hair as though she were soothing a child.
Moiraine fell forward into Egwene's arms and cried. The two women sat in each other's embrace for what seemed like a millennia. Egwene finally broke the silence, "You want to know the real reason why I am here?"
Tear streaked, Moiraine lifted her face to Egwene, "why did you come then?"
Without saying a word Egwene leaned into Moiraine's face and gently kissed her small rose bud lips. Slowly pulling away from the shocked other woman, Egwene looked down at her lap, "because I have loved you..."
"You loved me? What do you mean..." Moiaine's words were interrupted by Egwene's lips. Her kiss was more insistent as though she was trying to prove something to herself and to Moiraine. It took awhile but Moiraine's lips finally parted to let Egwene in. Egwene explored Moiraine's mouth before both their tongues collided.
Egwene's hands explored Moiraine's petite body she was thinner from what she remembered. She made sure that she was careful with Moiriane's dress since it was probably the only one she had. She made a mental note to bring a change of clothes the next time she visited Moiraine. At the moment Egwene was too caught up in exploring the other woman's body to further continue any other thoughts that were not relevant to the task at hand.
With a heavy sigh Moiraine was the one to pull away. "I can't do this. Not now, not here. Not ever." She looked away from the stunned Egwene. "I have to admit I do love you, but I don't think this will solve anything." Moiraine held Egwene's hands, and sadly smiled, "I don't want you wasting you love on me..."
Egwene looked up to the heavens in attempt to ward of the sharp pain that was now threatening to overtake her entire being. She could not be rejected like this, not now. Not when everything she held dear to her was teetering on the brink of destruction. "Moiraine please!" Egwene begged. "Now that I know where to find you I can come to you often."
Moiraine shook her head, "I am not of your world. This is a fantasy love that you and I both know is doomed." Moiraine now had a resolute look in her eyes. "You must go, there is no point in wasting your energies here, especially if there is no way of freeing me." Moiraine stood up and buttoned her tattered dressed and smoothed down its front. Looking directly on Egwene, Moiraine knew she was about do one of the hardest tasks, "Egwene if you love me, then you will leave. You will leave and never return, find another love, someone who can be with you and support you. I am not that person."
Crying forcibly Egwene stood up and grabbed Moiraine by the shoulders and gently shook her. "You know not what you say. I know you love me, why would you want to send me away? If I leave like this then I surely will never return." The last hung in the air like the last cord of a ballad.
"If you what you say is true, then Thom will come for me. You cannot do much in this state Egwene. You must leave me." Choking back a cry, Moiraine put her fist to her mouth. "Please..." At that Egwene embraced the other women for one last time before disappearing forever.
Moiraine was then left standing in her lonely existence. Alone.