Greg the Cyberman banged his iron gavel on the podium several times, in a desperate bid to get everyone's attention.
"Settle down. Thank you Blon Fel-Fotch Pasameer-Day for that stirring list of reasons why you hate the Doctor and what you'll do when you next see him. Our next speaker --"
He narrowly avoided being impaled by a harpoon and several silver bullets. Everyone took advantage of his lapse in concentration to once again start yelling, grunting or screeching their disapproval of the absent Time Lord.
It was several minutes before Cyber Greg could get a word in and then it was only because he grabbed the megaphone and threatened to Delete everyone unless they shut up.
"Whoever that is, if you shoot at me one more time, I will have you forcibly removed from the hall. Is that Understood?" Nobody said a word. "Our final speaker is Dalek Flak. Welcome him."
Polite applause echoed around the hall as a bronze pepper pot trundled onto stage and the Cyberman lowered the microphone to its level. "Tell us why you're here."
"I – will – ex-ter-min-ate – the – Doc-tor!"
If Greg could have rolled his eyes he would have. "Well, obviously. Who doesn't want to these days? Tell us why and then maybe we can help you."
Flak's eye stalk swivelled to face the Cyberman. "He – is – in-fer-ior. I – will – ex-ter-min-ate – the – Doc-tor!"
With great difficulty, Greg folded his arms as Flak began repeatedly chanting, "Ex-ter-min-ate, ex-ter-min-ate!'.
It was going to be a long night.
At the back of the hall, the Wire declared she was hungry and said in an undertone to the bored man next to her, "They think they've got it bad? The Doctor tried to tape a version of Casanova over me!"
The man perked up slightly at the talking portable television before rolling his eyes dramatically. "So? I was this", he held his thumb and forefinger one millimetre apart, "close to universal domination and He had to go all glowly and 'look at me, I can fly!' But you know what the worst part was? He had to go and blubber all over my new suit!"
The Wire smiled pleasantly. "I tried to zap him on top of a 1950's TV transmitter--"
The Master rested his legs on the back of the chair in front of him and replied, "Big deal. I pushed him off the top of a radio telescope."
The Wire's eyes were bigger than her power button. "Oh, do tell sweetheart!"
The Master grinned. He did love a good audience.
Unfortunately, before he could begin, the door swung open and every head - except the Master's (he steepled his fingers and tried his hardest not to do his trademark evil smirk. He failed. Quite badly.) - swung to the right to see who else had arrived with a vendetta against the Doctor.
The aforementioned gallifreyian was standing stock-still in the doorway and was rapidly turning a very pale shade of grey. "Uhh…looks like you're busy, I'll come back later!"
He slammed the door and hot footed it back to the Tardis, dodging various laser beams and followed by several hundred irate aliens.
Rose had her feet propped on the console when the Doctor wrenched open the doors and tore up the ramp. Without looking up from the magazine she was reading she said, "I told you not to answer any weird facebook invitations — especially if it's from someone who signs in as 'doctorsnemesis'!".