Author's note: The music that I used on this one is Love Remains the Same by Gavin Rossdale. Also it is much appreciate for any reviews you wish to provide. Please be constructive with any criticism or praise.
BTW, most of the Chuck fanfic authors are at: Fanfiction/forum/TWoPKickedUsOutButWeStillLoveChuck/49974/
Disclaimer: I don't own Chuck. All of the characters belong to whomever. I own the plot and theme in this story though. I did this one pretty quickly so expect errors. If you feel you want them fixed, then send me the fixes and I will do it.
BTW, Reviews help convince us to keep writing these stories. Enjoy it if you can or not. )
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A thousand times I've seen you standing
Gravity like a lunar landing
You make me want to run till I find you
I shut the world away from here
I drift to you, you're all I hear
As everything we know fades to black
The clatter of heels resound throughout the patio area, knowing that they will bring both love and hurt.
Perfect in her beauty, perfect smile framing her heavenly face. A smile that will live within my memories until the day I die. Given the way things have gone lately, that may not be very long indeed.
Still reeling from the speech that I had just given to Sarah, knowing that it hurt her as well as myself. I am still not sure if it was the right thing, but Bryce has always been an enigma to me.
I watch her talking to Ellie and Devon, when Sarah looks back at me. My life, my love, my soul have darkened today. Because of a duty to protect Sarah, my future seems to be fading to black.
Half the time the world is ending
Truth is I am done pretending
Another mission and I am so close to Sarah but yet so far. Another world altering evil plan has been put down.
Somehow I don't feel that much better. Before that fountain of dread, I just don't feel the same about saving the world. Before that fountain, Bryce talked me into 'Doing the right thing', now I hate every time I walk by it.
I am done pretending that this life doesn't hurt. The lies, the killing, the pretending that Sarah and I are still a couple. I want to be done pretending; I want this intersect out of my head!
I never thought that I
Had anymore to give
You're pushing me so far
Here I am without you
Drink to all that we have lost
Mistakes we have made
Everything will change
But love remains the same
Setting her in the bar, I don't even remember how I got here. As I drink down another glass, my mind wonders back to that day. How things could have been different.
I down another shot of Eagles rare, cursing myself for all the mistakes I've made with Sarah.
Giving up what I want most in this world. Giving up the Love that I know could change the world for the 'Greater Good', what a laugh.
Really, is there any 'Greater Good' than true love? Then again, if Sarah were to die because I have pushed my love on her, that would be the end of me.
All that we have been through, the love I believe we feel for each other. But with all that love, we remain the same, pretenders.
I find a place where we escape
Take you with me for the space
The city buzz sounds just like a fridge
I walk the streets through seven bars
I have to find just where you are
The faces seem to blur
They're all the same
Recalling the time that I found out about Sarah's real name. I still can't get used to think of her as Jenny.
She was so mad that I had learned something real about her past. Sarah had taken off and I thought that would protect her. Boy was I wrong.
Lights were flashing and there she was, sitting there with a drink in her hand. Talking to a perfect stranger as if they had been friends forever.
I sat there watching from a distance, all the other faces in the bar blurring before my eyes.
My eyes would only focus on Sarah and her bar partner. Watching her smile going to someone else. Not like I didn't already know that this would happen sooner or later.
Half the time the world is ending
Truth is I am done pretending
Truth is that I had been dreading this for several weeks now. All the mistakes I had made coming back to me all at once.
The pounding in my ears, from watching her, sounded like the world was ending in an explosion.
Some idiot said "The truth will set you free", well whomever it was can have their freedom.
I cringe as I watch her lean over and his the strangers lips.
That is IT, I am done. I am done pretending that I am cut out for this spy world.
Picking up my glass, I down my drink and slam it back down on the table. Still sting from the alcohol burning as it went down, I turn to leave.
From the corner of my eye, I see that Sarah spotted me leaving. I disappear into the night, like a ghost fading into the nothingness of space.
I never thought that I
Had anymore to give
You're pushing me so far
Here I am without you
Drink to all that we have lost
Mistakes we have made
Everything will change
But love remains the same
I didn't have any more to give to them, they had taken it all. My handlers have nothing but a shell left to work with.
Floating in a haze from mission to mission, not really knowing what I did. The only thing that I did now is the numb feeling that I felt constantly.
Casey and Sarah constantly pushing for me to do more. What more do they want?
I do my job, I do the government job, I pretend that I care, what more can I give?
I frequent my favorite pub, setting in my usual corner drinking to our loss. Knowing that Sarah would survive, but would I?
Burning the candle at both ends, I have pushed myself to its' limits. I have nothing left to give, not even to myself.
The only thing that I will not give, is give up on my family. I continue to make this life better for Ellie and the gang.
So much more to say
So much to be done
Don't you trick me out
We shall overcome
It's all left still to play
I am laughing, not really knowing why. Laughing at the pain that I feel, but it is different this time.
This time the pain is physical and not emotional. I set here in the car with a bullet hole pouring blood out of my side.
I told them the car is never safe! Well, maybe this time they will listen, that is if I live long enough to tell them.
Feeling my life ebb out, I realize that I have so much more to say to Sarah. I have so much that I have not done in my life.
I need to make sure that I do something that makes Ellie proud of me. I can't leave this world without at least doing one good deed for her to know about.
'Stop thinking like that Chuck!', I say to myself. It's not over yet and people are counting on you.
Just then a shadowy figure steps out in front of me, pistol in hand, aiming to shoot Sarah while her back is them.
I put the car in gear and speed towards the figure. It is too late when he turns to face me. I am able to stop him, but not before I feel a pinch of pain. Then all fades to black.
We - should have the sun
Could have been inside
Instead we're over here
My mind is floating, dreaming of a life I could have had with Sarah.
Dreaming of a life where Ellie is proud of me and what I have done with my life. That I was able to share the many accomplishments that Team Bartowski had done to make her life safer.
Sarah and I should be at a beach somewhere, But here I am not sure if I am alive or this is my version of an afterlife.
Half the time the world is ending
Truth is I am done pretending
Too much time too long defending
You and I are done pretending
Waking to the pounding in my side and the fuzziness in my head, I slowly open my eyes.
Not knowing what to expect, what I see is not even close to what dreamed would happen.
There were unknown faces, looking over my chart. No Ellie, no Sarah, not even Morgan, Anna, Jeff or Casey.
I go back to sleep, not willing to pretend that it did not hurt. I let the tears fall from my eyes.
Closing off myself, now I will live for myself. Knowing when I get out, I will do whatever I need to do to get back my old self.
The one before I fell into this horrible rut. Charles Carmichael may have been fake, but soon he will be more.
I am done defending the poor excuse of a life. It is time that Chuck and Charles are done pretending that they are not the same.
I never thought that I
Had anymore to give
You're pushing me so far
Here I am without you
Drink to all that we have lost
Mistakes we have made
Everything will change
Everything will change
These last few months after my recovery had been great. I never knew that I still had more to give. I gave it all to myself this time and it felt good.
I cannot believe that I ran into Jill of all people. The old feelings came back in full force.
I am glad that I stopped pretending to make her like me. Jill liked me for myself and I forgave her. Not like I haven't done things to be forgiven for, considering all of the lies that I have told to Ellie.
We both made mistakes and it seems to be working out for the both of us. I know that I will never love her like I do Sarah.
I recall the dance club that Jill and I went to, to talk about things. After we got everything out into the open, we made a toast.
A toast to forget all that we have lost and to forgive the mistake we have made. To start out with a clean slate.
Then the memory of how we gave it a try, but again my side job got into the way. Then again, even though it was great being with Jill, it was me that had the commitment problem.
I could not push past the love that I feel for Sarah. Didn't matter in the end with Jill working for people trying to take me.
I still don't remember much after that. Somehow ending up in a bunker, everything is a blur.
I, oh I,
I wish this could last forever
I, oh I,
As if we could last forever
All I can remember is Sarah getting me out. The worry in her eyes, the love still showing deep down inside.
It was as if this was all some kind of weird trial for our love. She was like my own personal angel.
We embraced and kissed so deeply that I all the bad things were washed from my mind.
Her love was so overpowering that I knew we would make it after all. There are some things that never change and I should have never let this love of ours get so lost.
I hope that we can put the pieces back together. Wishing that our love will last forever this time.
As if we had never been apart, we settle back into our old rhythm. The feel of her hand in mine, her eyes looking me over.
We had always been friends, that we had never lost. Now it was our turn to see how we will be as lovers.
My love for Sarah has never diminished, build to last forever. It is an epic love that I have for her and I hope she has for me.
After everything we have done and lived though, our love remained the same!
Love remains the same
Love remains the same