Mistakes of the Scars I Left Behind

As I glance over the shimmering blue waters, I think of all the harm I've done, pain I've enflicted, memories of those I betrayed that refuse to fade. No matter how hard I try, those faces never seem to bleach themselves from my mind.

I remember the first fight Crow and I got over. We were five, and I stole his cookie. My legs were longer than his, so I ran faster. I ate his cookie and laughed at him, resulting in a skirmish outside. I remember being covered in mud, and blaming it all on Crow. Somehow, it worked, and he had always rued the day until he would reak his revenge. Perhaps, maybe someday, I'll give him a pack of Chips Ahoy! and we'll be even. But even I know things will not go over so easily.

I remember my best mate, Yusei. We were like polar opposites. He was always so fun-loving and cheerful. I wasn't. I liked making fights and dominating. He didn't. Yet somehow, we became inseperable. That is, until I betrayed him.

I remember Kalin. Kalin was an awesome friend, until he became power crazy. He killed. He lied. We meant nothing to him anymore. All he wanted was power, until that power destroyed him. Kinda like me.

Then there was Martha, the care taker at the orphanage. I was one of her first children to be brought up there. I remember seeing all of the children grow up with me. I had so many friends then. Then we all found dueling and girls, and part of my life was a blur. I remembered how, once, she was able to catch a signal on T.V. It was a movie about knights, princesses and princes. Princess Bride I think it was called. Then I made this little routine for her that always made her happy. I can feel it deep down that, even though I did nothing but leave, I betrayed her as well.

When I look back, I cannot believe what I have done. What happened to me?

I remember one day I will never forget. The one day I betrayed all those I loved. The day I lost control.

I remember asking Yusei to pick between his precious Stardust Dragon or save Rally, yet another I have harmed, who was tied in a boat on the trecherous sea. I was given the chance of a lifetime, and I couldn't blow it. I knew I was destined for greater things than the Satellite. I had to have not only my most powerful card, but my friend's as well, along with his duel runner he had practically made from scratch. The look in his eyes were evident. How can you do this to us? His eyes asked. How could you become this monster? How could you betray us like this? How could you rip away our dreams? What happened to the Jack I knew? Right then and there I was starting to regret. What was I doing? Would I give up my friends for my own selfish gains? In my heart, that seemed to ice over when he looked at me with those eyes of hate, I knew the answer.

I am not the man you once knew. My eyes said back, feeling them harden like stone. I am born for greatness, and you for nothing. You will always be nothing Yusei Fudo, just like everyone else here. Just know that your time is ticking. And when you come back, I will not be here.

His eyes seemed to just accept it. Maybe deep down, I was wishing he'd fight back.

He turned to the pier, and shed off the blue jacket he wore, and looked back at me one more time.

I hate you Jack. But even though I hate you, I wish you the best of luck. I will come for you one day Jack. And when I do, you better be ready.

With that, he plundged into the ocean. I turned, and gathered his deck, and sifted through it until I found the shimmering dragon. I then proceeded to put that card into my deck, and looked back. Yusei was invisible between the vicious waves. A small part of me wished he would drown, just so I would never have to see the hate in his eyes ever again, to not see the light of judgement day. I turned again, and gathered his helmet in my hands and placed it on my head. I revved his runner, and in a flash, I was gone, hopefull never to see the damage I had created.

As I was zooming down the tunnel, my thoughts roamed.

What did I just do?

I had just given up my friends, my family! Just for my own gain. I had betrayed all I ever loved and cared about. I had hurt those who had meant the world to me.

And that's when I came to the realization of what I had become.

Kalin Kessler.

My heart suddenly felt as though it had just been shot. What have I done? Oh, God! What have I done?

I was thinking about turning back, forgetting all that I had done, how I changed, but a darker voice krept into my thoughts.

"You saw what Yusei thought." the voice whispered. "If Yusei thinks that way about you, just think of what the others would do."

In so, I kept zooming foreward, my eyes blank of any emotion.

"What are friends that will stop you from your goals, anyways? You are a champion, Jack. You don't need friends. Especially Satellite trash." It cooed. I could feel my will slipping.

Don't call my mates trash! A small part of my mind was screeching, but was falling upon deaf ears.

"Come with me Jack, and i'll take you places. You'll forget 'bout those sewer rats in no time. I'll make you stronger. Come on Jack, let go, and be what you were meant to become!" it said, my mind so numb in what I was feeling, I did what I was told. I let go of all the happy memories. I let go of all the painful things. I let my friends drift out of my heart. Then, when those things were out, my heart iced over. My thoughts grew dark. Suddenly, it was only me.

"What are friends anyways, other than things that feed off your heart and throw it aside. I don't need anybody. I'm Jack Atlas!" I remember shouting at no one, and I could no longer feel the pain in my frozen heart. My eyes hardened into violet weapons that you could never break down.

Soon enough, I was in Domino. I was greeted warmly and such, but I didn't care. I was shown to a room by a little man with a clown face, and shown to the director.

Then my life started to change.

I was loved again. I was famous. I had girls throwing themselves at me. Yet, somehow, I was still never happy.

In so, I sit here every night in my mansion, looking out the window and across the sea. If I truly look, I can see Satellite. But now-a-days, I don't even try to look. I try not to remember. I try not to remember the days where I laughed. Where I grew up. I try not to remember anything there. The pain I caused, the suffering I brought. The anger and nights of screaming I put on myself.

No, I, Jack Atlas don't care. I have everything I ever wanted. Why do I care about some filth that I left behind? That's what heart tells me. But my mind can be cruel, reminding me of things I want to forget. But somethings just refuse to fade. Now I look across the sea, and I wonder if I really made an impact. In a way, I wish Yusei would just come already, maybe to show that I actually did some harm, to just stop my guessing. But the other part of me wants him to stay there, to never find out the wrong I've done.

And those things that refuse to fade are the mistakes of the scars I left behind.

Here it is! Hope you like it!

Please read some of my other stories and review both (both as in this story and the others I write please)

Fairfarren,

Etc., etc., etc.,

~ILJA~