Then He Kissed Me
I own nothing
Jeff looks me in the eyes, as though the weight of the world is on his shoulders.
Britta and Slater just confessed they love him, so I'm sure his emotional reserves have been depleted.
But here he stands with me, as though the world is okay because I'm with him.
It used to be that the world is okay because he was around, which I always hated.
But now that he's showing real emotion, I've never felt closer to him. And I can't help but smile.
I take a step closer. We just finished a hug, so I'm hoping for another.
He takes another step closer as well.
I don't know what I'm doing.
It's like the first time I felt the rush of Adderall.
My heart is pumping. I can feel it against the inside of my chest.
My legs are shaking.
He leans in.
I close my eyes.
Then he kissed me.
What am I doing.
He has two potential girlfriends in there. One, a professor, the other, an attractive blonde.
I'm an 18-year-old recent addict with too much emotional baggage.
I suddenly feel sorry and pull away.
I look apologetically in his eyes.
Half-closed, those baby blues seem to read my mind.
He pauses, then briskly steps forward.
Then he kisses me.
This isn't the rush of Adderall.
This is something greater.
I forget all about Britta, and Slater, Vaughn, and even Troy.
Troy, the love of my life.
Slater and Britta, possibly the loves of his.
His hand is on my side. I forget everything.
There is nothing in the world but Jeff.
Then he kisses me again.
Sigh.
Slater and Britta.
Two impossibly hot girls.
Both after me.
Normally this would be any man's dream, but now all I can think about is this.
I thought Annie was leaving forever.
With some jerk who took her for granted.
And here she is.
Connecting with my impossibly complex problems.
I chuckle to myself. Annie. Little, young, eternally stressed-out Annie.
Standing here. With me.
Her eyes, those big brown one that always got me, were standing only a foot away.
She takes a step closer, possibly wanting another hug.
I momentarily wonder what she's doing, then I find I like it.
She leans in and kisses me.
What just happened.
A brief moment of ecstasy- then nothing.
She's suddenly standing in front of me with an apologetic look.
I want to sigh in frustration, wondering if what I thought just happened really did.
Because I want it to.
Slater and Britta are already in the back of my mind.
I'm about to kiss her again, but I stop.
For once, I use what Annie taught me and think ahead.
What could possibly happen if I kissed her again?
She obviously enjoyed it. I can see it in her face.
That's all I need. I step forward.
Then I kissed her.
My hand in her hair, hers on my shoulder.
I kiss her again.