Natasha was once again sitting in her room going over the leads that she had gathered while searching for Bruce. Its been 6 months and still nothing. She was busy training the New Avengers and following the leads. Clint had returned to the team after spending some time with his brother and his family.
Since Clint came back, she had some free time. Clint and Steve sometimes trained the team while Natasha rested. Natasha admitted that having Clint back was a relief. Her best friend could watch her back like no one else.
Plus he was helping Steve search for the Winter Soldier.
Natasha couldn't understand why would Bruce run away from her. They both could have run away together. But Natasha knew in her heart that she would not have been happy. She still had her ledger to balance out. She will always be a spy.
There was a knock on her door and Clint walked in. He looked like he had just finished his work out.
"No sign of Bruce?" asked Clint.
Natasha shook her head.
Clint felt for her. Natasha had opened herself up and had gotten hurt again. But he could understand Bruce's guilt. He had gone through the same after Loki.
"Maybe you should stop." he said.
"Why would I want to do that?" asked Natasha surprised.
"He obviously doesn't want to be found." said Clint.
Natasha was silent
Clint sighed. "Can I ask you something?" he asked.
"Sure." said Natasha.
"Why did you actually pursue Bruce, Nat?" he asked.
Natasha knew what Clint was asking. She could lie, but Clint will know. So she went for the truth.
"Around him I didn't feel like a monster anymore. I was going to run away with him." she said.
"You aren't a monster, Tasha. We all have done things we regret." said Clint. "And running away? Nat, you have always faced a problem head on." he said.
Natasha knew Clint was right. She pursued Bruce because around him she didn't feel like a monster. She didn't have to justify her past.
"Plus when have you let men rule your life?" said Clint.
"Never." said Natasha. Now thinking about it, Natasha felt stupid. She had wasted 6 months pining after someone who wasn't remotely interested in her.
Natasha could see Clint smiling.
"You are an Avenger. You don't need a man to define yourself." said Clint.
Natasha smiled. "Thanks, I know I have been a mess for past 6 months. It's time to move on I guess." she said.
Clint smiled and nodded. He hugged her. "I'll just go and shower. How about movie marathon?" he asked.
"Sure, why not?" said Natasha. She watched as Clint went to shower.
She suddenly realized something. She was pursuing the wrong man. The person who always stood by her was right in front of her all this time. Clint Barton. Clint who accepted her with all her flaws.
Clint who forgave her mistakes. Who loved her fully an unconditionally.
Around Clint she never felt like a monster. She felt whole.
Natasha knew her best friend had feelings for her. She loved him too. Had for years. She was always jealous of the attention he would receive from other women even when she was actively pursuing Bruce.
But in her quest to prove that she wasn't a monster, she had ignored the obvious.
She had wasted so much of time.
But now she is done being an idiot.
She was going after what she truly wanted.
She was going to follow her heart for once and pursue her happiness.
She after everything deserved to be happy.