'It was a dark and stormy night in outer space. Harry Potter was there. He flew out in to space on his broomstick. He was just flying around, when suddenly, Voldemort apparated into thin air...only it wasn't air, it was thin vacuum (not the cleaner, the empty void). Draco Malfoy walked in, and he said "Wazzup, dudes." And then Harry said, "I'm gonna get you this time, Voldy!" Then Draco said "I'm on his side" and pointed at Voldemort. Then Voldemort took out his wand and killed Draco. Then Harry laughed. "Hahahaha", he said. Then Voldemort said, "Now it's only you and me, Potter. Let's see if you can stand the force...of the...vacuum-cleaner!" Voldemort pulled out his magic vacuum-cleaner, and started sucking at Harry Potter. Suddenly, Harry's broom flew out from under him, and was sucked into the vacuum-cleaner! And Harry fell. Down. Harry fell down, down, down, down... But then Voldemort's vacuum-cleaner sucked up all the empty vacuum in space, and there was nothing for Harry to fall through, and so suddenly, he started floating. It was quite relaxing, he realized. But he had non-relaxing things on his mind. Ginny and Draco had just started dating the week before, and Harry was worried how she would react to knowing that Draco had been killed by Voldemort in outer space! Poor Ginny, who was already so in love. "Oh, hell", Harry thought, "perhaps she will come to me for comfort, and then I can have her instead!" Then Voldemort flew down on his vacuum-cleaner, which doubled as a broom-stick. "Wait a minute, Potter", he said, "I'm going to restore the vacuum. Wait one second, and I will be able to kill you. Once and for all." He added, "hahahahaha" in a maniacle laughing way, and then started fiddling with his vacuum-cleaner. There were several buttons. Suddenly, Harry darted forth, and pushed the button labelled "do not push". Nothing happened, and so he tried the button next to it, the on-button, and Voldemort was sucked into the vacuum-cleaner. Harry switched the vacuum-cleaner off. "Voldemort is so stupid," he thought, and laughed to himself. "Haha-haha-haha!"'
"Blimey!" Harry said as he awoke, "What a weird-assed dream!" As an afterthought, he added, "And it was really badly written, wasn't it?", before he got up, and went to breakfast.
The authors of this story would like to apologize for subjecting its readers to it. We truly are sorry. Please forgive us. We are weird. Our other stories will not be like this. We promise.