Pairings: KuronueXKurama and YomiXKurama. Implied HieiXKurama and KoenmaXBotan
Warning: Contains Yaoi, alcohol usage, references to sex and serious OOCness
Rating: Teen. (read warnings!)
Disclaimer: If you're a vampire... ish lawyer out hunting for my rich tasty fanfiction writing blood then go away, I don't own shit fuck.
A/N: This fic is pathetic and I'm ashamed over it. I guess this is what you'd call an Impulse fic, I didn't plan anything it just kinda happened. I hadn't slept for two day and eaten an entire 250g chocolate bar on my own, I was on the sugar high of the century (This comes from a person who thinks a treat is to put butter on a toast.)
OXXXO
Shiori stood in the doorway of her son's bedroom, she had come to ask him and his visiting friends if they wanted some tea. But now she couldn't help but think her son had some really peculiar friends. Did that girl actually have blue hair?
The rather good looking young man standing by the window would have seemed completely normal hadn't it been for the pacifier in his mouth and the word Jr written on his forehead.
The other three she knew, somewhat.
The black haired one was Yusuke, he seemed all right but could on occasion appear rude, though he was actually very friendly and loyal.
The carrot head was Kuwabara, she'd only meet him a few times but knew he loved cats.
The short one dressed in black was Hiei, she'd seen him several times with her son or sitting in the tree outside her sons window. She'd sometimes invite him for ice cream which she new he enjoyed vigorously, even though he was always scowling.
They where some really strange people but on the other hand, Shiori wasn't stupid, she knew her son wasn't exactly normal so why would his friends be?
She'd always known her son wasn't normal, though she'd never been able to really place it. There was something about him that seemed off or eerie... not in a bad way, he had just never seemed to fit in.
She'd known it since the day he was born. There was something in his eyes, like an ancient knowledge living behind those marvellous green orbs. As if they didn't belong to an infant but rather an ancient creature of incredible power and wisdom who had seen the world grow and didn't obey to the laws of humanity.
Her son, she sometimes believed, wasn't her son. He was something else, something not of this world.
Shiroi was ashamed to think that way about her own child but she couldn't help it... all those sleepless nights, alone in the house while her son had gone off somewhere. Or the sleepless nights after he'd come back: bruised, bandaged and with his clothes covered in blood. Though he never told her it was blood, there were always some excuse, and for some odd reason she never confronted him about his lies. Maybe she was afraid of what the answer might be?
The blue haired girl skipped over to her and bowed with a huge smile "Hello Mrs … is it Hatanaka? Anyway I'm Botan. Nice to meet you."
The young man with the pacifier also came over, he bowed dramatically to her and kissed the back of her hand "I am the great Koenma-sama, you may refer to me as Koenma."
Sweat-dropping and blushing slightly Shiori smiled, "Nice to meet you too Botan-chan, Koenma-kun."
Botan clapped her hands together grinning "So Shiori-san maybe you would like to join us?"
The woman blinked "Join you? In what?" she asked rather intrigued, it had been quite a while since she last did anything together with Shuuichi.
"We were thinking about playing a game of facts, would you like to join us?" Yusuke smiled at her, a sort of mischievous twinkle in his eyes.
Shiori smiled, a part of her feeling as if this was planned "Oh, I would love too. That is if you want an adult playing with you?"
Yusuke, Botan, Kuwabara and Koenma grinned at her.
"Lets go downstairs" Kurama sighed in defeat "The living room's nicer."
Kuwabara grabbed the plastic bag which rested against the wall while the rest moved downstairs into the living room area. Kurama sat on the floor leaned against the sofa the others all sat in a circle from there except for Hiei who plopped himself, stomach down, on the sofa behind the red head.
The carrot top opened the bag and took out cans of beer and a bottle of vodka. "Okay," Yusuke said, calling everyone's attention "The game of facts, it's simple people. We all take turns stating a fact and if you disagree with the fact you have to drink." he said gesticulating towards the alcohol.
"As an example!" Botan exclaimed "Fact: I am a girl. Those of you who aren't girls have to drink."
"Or," Kuwabara cut in "I have never borrowed my mothers underwear. Those that have will have to drink."
The Prince of Reikai, the two demons and the woman nodded understanding the rules of the game.
"Then lets begin!" Yusuke grinned.
"Wait!" Koenma cut in "We'll need glasses, I'm not going to drink out of the same bottle Yusuke's mouth been touching."
"I'll get us some glasses." Shiori said disappearing into the kitchen. Once she was gone Koenma turned to the group staring sternly at them "I am going to make one more rule" he said "Whomever lies will be gravely punished and that goes especially for you two" he said looking directly at Kurama and Hiei. The fox made a stuttering noise "But she might find out! … Are you trying to set me up?"
The gang blinked at him with a look of 'Obviously' on their faces, Kurama growled "You can not commence this…"
Koenma held up a instructive finger "You, Youko Kurama may not resign from the game nor lie or I'll throw both you and Hiei in the Reikai demon prison."
The fox and fire demon both growled maliciously showing just how much they wanted to kill the prince of Reikai for that cheap trap.
"He owns us." Hiei said through the jagan "Tell me again why we ever agreed to this?"
"Because" Kurama sighed back through the mental link "It was either that or torturous demon prison. I'm starting to regret my decision..."
"Here's glasses" Shiori said, if she noticed the tension in the group of youngsters, she paid no heed to it.
"Let's get this party starting!" Yusuke exclaimed. Kurama groaned inwardly; this was bad, this was really, really bad. Well, he could always sneak death plant seeds into their drinks, right?
"Ladies first" Kuwabara said pointing at Botan.
The girl merely grinned happily "I believe in the existence of spirits and demons." she said. The first fact was to tread the ground and find out what the human woman believed in. The knowledge of her son being a Kitsune would be easier to accept if she believed in spirits to begin with.
And, no one drank, Botan almost sweat-dropped "That was easy. Everyone believes in them?"
"Sure." Shiori said "I've never doubted their existence."
"Duh!" Yusuke grinned like his regular dimwit self.
-30 minutes later-
"I've never slept with a man." Kuwabara announced, feeling the first warm tingles of intoxication move throughout his body.
No one drank except for Shiori (Big shock there everyone) and Koenma, everyone stared at him but the prince of Reikai merely shrugged "With my father of course" he said. Yusuke's eyes almost bulged out and Kuwabara made a disgusted noise.
"What's wrong with it!" Koenma elicited indignantly "I had a nightmare and he let me sleep with him."
Botan leaned in "Uhm, Koenma-sama, what Kuwabara meant with 'sleep' was..." she whispered into the prince ear and Koenma turned bright red "... My mistake! Please go on."
While the others figured out just how naive Koenma was; a somewhat discomforted Kurama fingered his glass of vodka before slowly bringing it up to his lips taking a few rather large gulps, once he lowered the glass everyone in the room where staring wide eyed at him. Actually they had not anticipated such a revelation. Well Yusuke had had quite a few imaginative guesses about what the fox demon might have done to keep warm in a pack of thieves, but he'd always kept them to himself.
Shiori scrambled from her seat and sat down before her son grabbing his hands "Shuuichi! When did this happen? Who is he? Someone I know? Was he your first? Was he good to you? He didn't hurt you did he?" Shiori bombarded her son with questions. The fox blinked as he tried to take in everything she asked. He could see the rest of the group smirking at him from behind Shiori's back. Don't worry he'd get them latter, get them good. Preferably with his death tree.
"A long time ago. His name's Kuronue. No, you've never been introduced. Yes. Yes and no." the fox answered to the best of his ability.
But Shiori wasn't finished interrogating her son "Did you love him?" She asked with a frown. She didn't care that he had had sex or that it had been with another man, that didn't bother her at all, Shiori was a well open-minded person. But, as any mother, she did not want to imagine her son giving himself to someone he didn't love.
The question startled Kurama. Kuronue had been dead for such a long time and he tried not to think about him too much, he still missed the bat dearly.
Yes, he had loved him, maybe he still partially did. That's why he didn't want to think too much, didn't want to remember how he died.
When Shiori noticed her sons sad and closed expression she took it the wrong way "You did love him, didn't you? And he dumped you. Don't worry Shuuichi, just point him out to momma and I'll set him straight." She said with a determined expression.
The fox shook his head sadly. "I loved him. But he didn't dump me, he... he died..." He trailed of, grief evident in his voice even after all these years.
The gang fidgeted when they realized the question had hurt Kurama. Kuronue might have died a long time ago but the memory of his death was still fresh in the fox's mind.
Shiori gasped before she pulled Kurama into a tight hug "I'm so sorry Shuuichi. You should have told me, I could have helped you through the process."
Kurama hugged her back 'It happened long before you're even born' he thought.
Hiei, who lay on his stomach on the couch frowned "Fox?" he asked through their mental link. The red head closed his eyes and smiled slightly "I'm all right Hiei." he answered back before putting on a smile and saying "Lets talk about something funnier. Shall we continue our game?"
'Obviously fake' Hiei thought 'the memory of Kuronue still hurts' "I believe it's my turn" the fire demon said out loud "I have never... uhm... uhm... pulled a donkey by it's tail."
"Who's done that!" Yusuke exclaimed with a raised eyebrow. Hiei looked about ready to fry the detective when Shiori coughed slightly and took a sip from her glass, everyone stared at her "I was ten and visiting a farm with my classmates, it was a dare." She said with a shrug.
The woman's face suddenly lit up in an 'aha' moment "Shuuichi" She said once again turning to her son "Kuronue did use protection, didn't he?" Kurama blinked and blushed 'Why is she assuming I was the Uke? ...Well I was, but still...'
The group fidgeted uncomfortably, she couldn't let it go could she.
"Mother." the fox sweat-dropped. Primarily he found it deeply disturbing having his human mother wanting to discuss his rather promiscuous sex life in Makai, which he was more then capable of handling on his own.
Shiori shook her head "I'm just saying Shuuichi, it's very important that you tell all potential bed partners to use protection, even in homosexual relationships, otherwise the Seme might end up with terrible breakouts on his penis caused by the bacteria..."
"Oh, Sha la la la la la Biiiingoooo!" Yusuke and Kuwabara sang on the top of their loud obnoxious voices trying to block the woman's words out. Koenma coughed and Botan suddenly found her shoelaces rather intriguing.
Kurama turned a bright shade of red only matched by his hair, even for a well experienced four thousand year old fox this was beyond embarrassing. "Mother!" he exclaimed. Shiori gasped, hand over her mouth "Oh, of course, I understand. We'll talk about it later."
"I would prefer we do not discuss it at all." He wouldn't commonly feel uncomfortable talking about sex, he was after all known for have liaisons in not so secluded places, but this…
"We'll have to talk, I'll give you some great advices. It's nothing wrong with having sex, it's natural, but you have to practice it safely." She said with a smile referring to the entire group.
"Mother..."
"I know what it's like to be young with raging hormones, I was once young too believe it or not. And young people experiment. Just make sure you're always safe. You don't want to get anyone hurt or pregnant" She said turning to Yusuke, Kuwabara, Koenma and Botan, especially the latter two, who blinked at the woman, turned bright red and started sputtering denials "What... we... No...!" "My father would kill me." "Oh, so I'm not good enough for your father!" "I... That's not what I mean!"
But the woman was finished with them, returning her attention to her son and Hiei, whom she for some reason decided also swung that way "Or in your case, we don't want anyone ending up with 'breakouts'" Hiei face-planted himself into cushion, but if it was from discomfort or annoyance was hard to tell.
"Mother!" Kurama cried in embarrassment.
"And you absolutely have to introduce me to all potential boyfriends" Shiori exclaimed happily "I shall deem them worthy!"
The entire group looked like they wanted to cry. Kuwabara and Koenma's eyes were blank, they had probably gone into a self induced mental coma.
Kurama were contemplating all known 67 possible methods of how to drown oneself in a glass of vodka. Number 14 seemed tempting but it involved a dolphin, a silk pillow and two bottles of Makai maple syrup. Where the hell was he going to get hold of two bottles of Makai maple syrup on Saturday evening?
Botan was establishing a new relationship with her shoelaces, she'd named them Megumi and Midori and they liked Karaoke.
"Wow" Yusuke breathed "This is more awkward then that time my mom tried to teach us about responsible alcohol usage while she herself was piss drunk."
"Can we please just get on with the game, anything is better then this" Hiei hissed red faced from the sofa.
The fox sighed in relief as he tried to regain control of his furiously blushing face.
"Thank you Hiei, finally a reasonable voice in this madness" Kuwabara cried. "... can't believe I just said that..."
Yusuke shook Botan out of her mental stupor "I believe it's Koenma's turn. Hit us Princely boy!" he grinned from ear to ear.
"Okay" Koenma frowned in deep concentration, a crease appearing between his brows. "... I, the great Koenma, have never... stolen anything." he said after a moment. Kurama cringed at the statement, why did the prince of Reikai have to bring that up?
Hiei drank.
So did Yusuke, thinking of that time when he was five and had stolen candy from the local super market.
Kuwabara seemed to ponder the statement "I don't think so, at least not as I can remember."
Botan simply smiled, she'd never taken anything in her life, or afterlife.
"A couple of guys hearts when I was younger" Shiori admitted "But I don't think that counts."
Now everyone turned to Kurama, the gang smirked at the fox. After staring at his glass for a few minutes the red head growled "Damn you all!" Then chugged his vodka and turned to Koenma "I'll get you for this." Forget all previous thoughts regarding a quick merciful death. He'd torture them first, then slowly feed them to his death tree, piece by piece. Oh, yeah! That's right, make them suffer, yes, Yes!
"Shuuichi!" Shiori berated "I think we have to talk about this. What have you stolen?"
"Well" Kurama said tilting his head to the side, knowing that he couldn't lie "Mostly stuff that shine like jewels, pearls and treasures. Some artwork, weapons and other rarities, but yeah, mostly shinny stuff."
The human woman simply gaped making a rather interesting imitation of an oxygen deprived fish.
"Shinny stuff?" Yusuke whispered glancing questioningly at Hiei.
"It's a fox thing." The fire demon commented in a hushed voice.
"Don't worry Shiori-san I've already taken care of it!" Koenma exclaimed smiling dazzlingly and sounding professional. Lying through his teeth of course; since he actually couldn't care less what Kurama had stolen throughout his life in Makai. The things he had stolen in Reikai on the other hand, well that had indeed been taken care of.
"Let's just get on with the game!" Kuwabara cried "Otherwise this fic will go on forever, the author has enough pointless facts to go on for hours and I wanna go home, I miss Eikichi."
"It's Yusuke's turn." Botan said gesticulating wildly towards the teen.
The rei-gun user thought intensely then came up with the perfect fact "I am human." he said with a grin plastered on his face.
Botan, Kurama, Hiei and Koenma all looked like they were silently imagining decapitating the young spirit detective, before they all grabbed their glasses and drank.
Shiori stared "What in the world" she stuttered "You're not... but... how... Shuuichi...?"
"I'm a demon." Hiei stated. Shiori gaped, (how much had he had to drink?)
"I'm a Shinigami" Botan grinned, cheerful as ever. Shiori stared at the blue haired girl, (okay what was the alcohol percentage of this beer?)
"I'm the son of Lord Enma" Koenma said, (It couldn't just be alcohol involved in that delusion.) The human woman gasped and turned to her son with wide eyes.
Kurama sighed and gave up. 'It's over' he thought, the knot in his stomach contracting to a painful degree "I... I am also a demon." There, it was out, his biggest secret was out. It was up to Shiori to accept him now. It is a known fact that after a Kitsune is found out they have to leave their human family unless they are accepted.
Shiori shook her head "No your not. I should know, I gave birth to you. You're not a demon..."
That knot contracted again and he cut her off "Mother, it's a little more complicated then that, and a long story."
Botan sighed "And that's our cue to shut up." she said sending the boys a look that dared them to interfere while Kurama spoke.
OXXXO
Two and a half hours later, after a lot of explaining from Kurama. (With lots of inputs from his friends of course. Inputs, which involved giggling, sarcastic comments, tactically dropped pieces of information Shiori really didn't need to know and a few painful nudges in the side.) Shiori sat agape on the living room floor of her house trying to make sense out of all of the things her son had revealed to her about himself.
The summery of it all was that he was a demon, a fox demon nonetheless and his real name was Youko Kurama.
"Youko" she whispered breathlessly, tasting the name. Kurama cringed with worry and anticipation. After a while Shiori lifted her head and smiled at him "Youko." She said, apparently finding that she liked the taste. "I like it, it suits you."
The fox stared dumbfounded 'She's in shock' was the only thought passing through his mind before he was swept into a tight hug.
"I don't care if you're a demon, an angel or last nights lasagne; you're still my son, Youko."
Kurama raised an eyebrow "You don't have to call me that." he said slowly. Shiori shook her head "No." She said "Youko is your name so Youko it is."
"She's taking this awfully good." Yusuke whispered, Kuwabara, Botan and Koenma nodded in agreement.
The fox frowned "Actually I prefer Kurama, Youko is more of a..." He was cut off by Shiori "Youko it is." The woman said, end of discussion "... Unless, of course Kazuya and Shuu-kun are home, we can't call you Youko in front of them just yet."
Kurama sweat-dropped he was going to have a serious identity crisis.
"So" The woman smiled "What does Youko stand for? Glorious child? Leaf Child?"
"Demon fox." The answer came flatly from the red head.
Shiori blanked "Oh."
OXXXO
Later that night Kurama and Hiei sat on the roof of the house watching the moon. "I'm surprised." Hiei said.
The fox sent him and inquiring look urging him to continue.
"Well, I never knew Kuronue but you told her he didn't hurt you, I'm surprised by that."
Kurama returned his gaze to the moon "Well, the first time did hurt, quite a lot as a matter of fact. We were both still fairly young and inexperienced with the act, we went a little overboard. But what she meant with 'hurt' was did he hurt my heart, and no he never did. Except for the fact that he died..." the fox trailed of.
"Hn." Was the fire demons only response "... There's this rumour about you in Makai, that says you like it rough."
The fox snorted "Tell me the demon that doesn't."
"True."
Silence fell between them for a while until Hiei snickered "You know, now you're going to have to introduce her to Yomi, I wonder how she'll take to finding out you're mated to a lord of Makai."
Kurama swore.
THE END
A/N: Yes. I am trying to teach you to practice safe sex here. Use a condom, kids! ;-)
I know this way for Shiori to find out was LAAAAME! This didn't turn out even remotely like I wanted it to. It wasn't supposed to be a story where Shiori finds out but somewhere along the line it turned into one, I'm not sure how that happened. I guess I got bored while writing it and decided to quickly finish it up.
I know. Yusuke isn't entirely human but he's more human then Hiei, Kurama, Koenma and Botan ever will be.
Youko is a woman's name with meanings such as: Free Child, Sunny Child, Ocean Child, Glorious child, Leaf child etc,but it can also be used as a pun and written with the characters for 'Demon' and 'Fox'. (check out the manga Tactics)
If you flame me I'll send Kuwabara after you to give you a serious lap dance, wearing too tight neon-puke-green/yellow coloured Speedos and singing a crack version of 'I'm too sexy' off key. (Wait, you might actually be in to that! Just don't flame, Okay!)