First warnings include gore and drama. Eventually this was supposed to become an all turtle love fest or something but I have to see just how much I can write that.
I do not own the turtles.
Dark eyes opened into a world of numbed coolness. Years of training tugged at a weary mind but the young genius's grip on reality was too weak to feel the gaping holes left in what should be. Three fingered hands fumbled across a fuzzy feeling floor to find it coalescing into firm coolness. Odd thoughts of the world being too insubstantial plagued his mind but he persevered. Pushing was hard with arms that felt like jelly but a couple of failed attempts eventually fell away to the young ninja pushing himself to his feet.
Along with the elevation came coherent thoughts rushing through the terrapin like large tides of water attempting to wash him away. A three fingered hand found a squishy face before it became coarser like the flesh Donatello was accustomed to. Donatello, that was his name. He could remember now. He and his brothers had been investigating yet another disappeared scientist when things went south. How had he made it back here in their sub terrain abode? The last thing he could remember was April getting pulled from her hiding place by one of those Foot Ninjas before everything went black. No, that was not quite it. His memories were pulled back into focus with perfect clarity. April had insisted on going out to investigate the disappearance of one of her father's former associates because there were still several hours more of daylight. Both he and Leo objected but it was ultimately her decision. Donatello winced and rubbed his face. Why did he let her go? The turtles could have handled it just fine after dark when Master Splinter allowed them to visit the surface.
"Father!" Donatello pushed off of the wall he had been leaning against and half ran, half floated through the misty form of his home to find his father's room empty. There was something wrong with this world. It was like it did not exist if he was not actively focusing on it. The ground was at least true and solid, but had the rough grain of concrete been there before he thought to look for it? The purple clad ninja shivered. Was it really cold here or had he just imagined that too?
What happened earlier?
When he imagined what had already passed, it seemed realer than the present. He was in the TV room with his brothers and April. She was as beautiful as ever with her hair pulled back in a serviceable pony tail. April was busy, clicking away on his laptop tracing this lead or that while he just stared at her. Leonardo had taken the remote hostage to enjoy his favorite show about a space captain. Donatello could remember that because his leaf green limbs were strewn about casually on the sofa behind April's determinedly hunched form. She often sat like that when she found something particularly interesting. She would put whatever it was onto the lap of her crossed legs and hunch her shoulders as her upper body stooped over her object of interest as she furrowed her brow just so in concentration. How he admired her.
He could hardly remember Michelangelo sitting on the few steps that led towards the kitchen, yammering on about some ninjitsu article in a magazine he had found one night during patrol. Where was Raphael when it happened? Donatello could remember him growling responses to their youngest brother but he could not remember what the red clad ninja had been doing at the time. They had made brief eye contact across the room but Raphael had not been physically doing anything that Donatello could remember. Was he ill? That was not important right now.
Why did he let her go?
He could see April's pale peachy face light up as she found a new lead. She announced that she was heading to the upper city bringing Leonardo's mother hen tendencies to the surface as he beseeched her wait to no avail. Donatello's own arguments to keep her down in the sewers felt weak even to his own mind, then he remembered Raphael suggesting she sync her cell phone to the shell cell frequency in case if she needed the turtles' help. Donatello frowned. Of course, she agreed sending a warming smile to Raphael. His chest throbbed. Where was that warmth now? There was no getting angry at Raph, he meant well.
But where was everyone?
Dark brown eyes flicked around the room. How had he gotten to the TV room? How had he gotten home? He lifted his hands from his lap, barely noting that he was seated on the couch. His hands looked how they always had, a wrinkle there, a bump here. He brought a pointer to the palm of his other hand and pushed, slightly fascinated by how the flesh there warped and buckled on the back of his hand where the finger was stretching his palm like rubber. Then this was a dream. Donatello remembered reading somewhere that that was one way to test if you were dreaming.
And just like that his finger was pressing against his firm palm just like any other day. So that was how he got here, he was dreaming. The fight must not have gone as well as it should have. Father would have some stern words for him when he got home. Standing from his seat and glancing around at his surroundings, Donatello amended his last thought. When I next see Father, he will have some stern words for me.
Knowing that nothing could be done at home, Donatello climbed the stairs to the sewers proper. He snatched up his younger brother's skateboard to shorten the trip topside. As long as he did not dwell on it, the way the surroundings zoomed past, featureless and hazy, was not too disturbing. Before he knew it, without even a thought, Donatello stood with his feet firmly on the damp concrete staring at the ladder his family normally used to go topside. Dark eyes darted around at the shifting world, confused about where Mikey's skateboard disappeared to. He brought his attention to the ladder and gave a start in realization that the crude vehicle was resting against the wall behind it. He had certainly not put it there. Tightening the knot on his mask and his resolve, he climbed and moved the too light slab of metal aside to expose the visage of nighttime New York City.
Everything slammed into focus and refused to budge as Donatello surfaced. The now realistic weight of the manhole cover was gritty and cool to the touch just as he remembered it. He slunk into the shadows, careful with his foot placement as he was trained but as grating as each misstep was to his ear slits, the noise seemed to fill the world that was otherwise void of life. Lean arms stretched towards the dark sky to grip a fire escape ramp as Donatello made his way to the roof. Grab, swing, flip, grab, swing, reach, grab, swing, flip, and land. Donatello reveled in each swift movement and how each fed propulsion to the next leading up to his landing on this rooftop. It was all so right, so perfect, as though it was real. His glide along the silent rooftops felt natural as well. The padding of his feet had to be precise and careful. Though his quiet footfalls were the only noise in this lifeless world, he still needed sure footing so he did not slip. As easy and common as it was, Donatello still focused on his run as though he was patrolling with his brothers.
He was more alert here, definitely, where there was no Raphael or Michelangelo to watch his back and no Leonardo to watch his front. Donatello may have been the least talented warrior of the four but he had his place and purpose on the team. But now, all alone in this shadow of a world, Donatello could feel his limitations weighing down on him full force. None of his brothers would be pulling him out of trouble here but perhaps if he was quick enough, he could be there when they needed him. Tense and alert, he trudged forward silent as the wind this place lacked. Each jump and twirl necessary to bring him where he needed to go. Too bad Master Splinter could not see him now. If he could, it might make up some for his horrendous blunder that brought him to this place.
Abruptly, the world stopped rushing past as Donatello halted on the same roof he and his brothers had been on earlier that night. It was all as he remembered it. Mikey and Leo had crouched right there next to the edge facing yet another abandoned warehouse in New York City. Didn't these people already have enough space issues without wasting such broad areas to store things they quite frankly did not need? Donatello had made quick work of pacing the building to find missed points of entry before joining his two brothers near the edge of the roof while Raphael just sat leisurely perched on an old air conditioning unit watching and waiting for further orders to smash stuff. Donatello could almost see Leo pointing at his preferred infiltration point while mapping out his plan. Raph would then approach the trio grumbling out some witty remark, this time at Mikey's expense, causing a short spat between the brothers before Leo reigned them both in for the mission. As worried as Donatello was, he remembered some of the tension in his shoulders being released by the sheer normalcy of all of it. Even though April was in danger, all hope still was not lost. The lonely Donatello took a deep breath for stability as he cast away his memories with a swift leap from the building. It was the first time he could remember just walking across the street under the lamplight but he would have to be shell shocked stupid not to take the opportunity now that he had it. He was not going to miss this opportunity to walk through the front door.
The old steel door came away with a rusty grate to expose three surprised looking ninjas. Donatello had no time for surprise though. He would not be taken out twice in one night! The purple masked ninja narrowed his all white appearing eyes to send a swift jab to the throat of one ninja who slackened with a slight strangled groan. Donatello then dipped his left hand down to the falling ninja's thigh to extract a few shuriken to toss towards the still active Foot Ninja while positioning the unconscious man between his terrapin body and the other humans in the room. The sharp ping of steel on steel too close to where he tossed the weapons out was all the confirmation he needed that the other ninja had recuperated and retaliated in just the way he expected.
He was wasting time here. He needed to find April.
Donatello tossed his unconscious man shield towards the ninja to the right in time to parry a bout of rapid hand jabs from the ninja on the left before a simple leg swipe brought the black clad ninja to his back on the floor with an "Omph!" just in time. The ninja turtle stepped aside as the unconscious Foot Ninja was pushed onto his teammate who was sprawled out on the floor still. Donatello blocked an all-out punch head on only deflecting it to the side as a bruising pain blossomed in his arm. Missing his bo sorely, Donatello quickly switched over to a jump spinning kick to swiftly take the man out with a head shot as his still conscious friend staggered to his feet with a katana at hand. The purple masked ninja started a rush but faltered when he got a better look at the sword, feeling the long hilt dig into his stomach. It was Leo's katana. The purple clad ninja's hand found the familiar grip of his brother's sword and thrust it away from his body as he simultaneously kneed his opponent's gut. Another quick blow to the man's neck rendered him unconscious as well so Donatello could strip him of his brother's katana. It was Leo's, same weight and feel and everything but where was the other one and where was Leo?
The sword felt odd in his hands out of the dojo but he mustered enough grace to stealth his way further into the warehouse. Large crates were everywhere and as good of a hiding place they were for Donatello's ninja skills, they were just as good for the Foot. Opting for expediency and a slight advantage, Donatello scaled a particularly high pile of pallets quietly.
A wave of nausea racked the purple clad ninja as he pressed himself to the top of his perch. Noise had erupted all around. Shouts and clangs and ragged pants that had not been there before assaulted Donatello harshly. Dark eyes opened as slits in a purple mask parted. The scene before him was too familiar. It was identical to before. His head ached as though someone had tried to split it apart like a piece of firewood. What was identical to before again? Before what exactly? Dark eyes opened again through the pain to analyze the situation. Leonardo and Raphael were hard pressed back to back both with their teeth bared, surrounded by over a dozen of the Foot Ninja. Mikey was further back, near to where Donatello had dropped his bo. Another intense pang shot through Donatello's head as he tried to remember when he had actually dropped it. Brown eyes snapped open again at a familiar whine. It was a certain precursor to Michelangelo accusing his brothers of cheating in the dojo. It was a certain precursor to Donatello's younger brother's defeat. The purple clad terrapin sprang to his feet in an instant, pushing his own discomfort as far from his physical being as possible.
He had to save Mikey!
Donatello saw red as he leapt from crate to crate. One last small sprint and he was flying off a stack of pallets and into the fray of battle. Not as deft with a blade as his older brothers, Donatello made his way to Michelangelo cutting, parrying, slicing, and hitting without a care of whether he was killing his opponents.
A fist flew towards one of his eyes and was promptly removed from the rest of its body by Donatello's quick slash. Another ninja approaching from behind earned himself a deft kick in the ribs. The crunch that resulted was nothing compared to the warmth that slowly spread across olive green skin as Donatello's hand met human flesh. The purple masked ninja felt shock join his pain and nausea but he had no time to fret over it as he wrenched Leonardo's katana from a man's chest to continue his pursuit of joining his brother in his fight. The whole world rocked and nearly knocked the purple clad ninja off his feet.
His snarling face swiveled toward Leonardo as the leader addressed his little brothers, "It's going to be alright Donatello. It is just us." The blue eyed gaze turned regard Raphael as the red masked ninja grappled with a particularly fearsome looking opponent. "Raph, can you hold him on your own? I want to be able to use both of my arms on the way out. No more surprises." Donatello blinked as new waves of pain racked him like the tide. How could Leonardo be so calm in the middle of a battle they were so clearly losing? What was wrong with the oldest turtle? He was making absolutely no sense. Raphael grunted out a reply that sounded so much closer than he really was and Leonardo turned back towards Donatello's direction. This time that icy gaze was focused on Michelangelo. His voice was louder this time, more strained. "Mike, you got 'em?" Donatello felt a zap of fear like sticking a paper clip in a socket. Michelangelo was on the ground with a Foot Ninja sitting on his plastron, slicing at his cheek. Mikey grunted and Leonardo nodded, turning back to his own battle.
Pain seared Donatello's eye sockets and the purple clad ninja's hands flew up to his head as a reflex but he fought them back down and glanced around for a weapon. That did not seem right. Weren't there ninja near him? How did he even make it this far without a weapon? His dark eyes widened as he spotted his bo near where Michelangelo lay screaming. He felt heavier and bulkier than ever as he made his mad dash towards his signature weapon. Donatello swore that he would practice more to become less of a burden in battles as his hands found the long wooden shaft of his bo. There was no twirling or situating his hands just so on the six foot pole like he might normally do. Instead, he ran screaming and swinging his bo. It was not the most refined move and it would probably get him kicked out of the dojo at home but he did not care. Mikey was in danger. Most of the ninja he knocked away were hardly any resistance but when his staff made contact with the heap of the man atop Mikey, it made a dreadful cracking noise and he could feel every bit of the impact in his arms as he watched the man with the broken skull fly away from Michelangelo's body.
Donatello's body shook as he pulled his little brother to his feet. The pair turned back to the Foot Ninja boxing them in. Brown eyes met true blue set in an orange mask and Donatello knew, despite their wounds and weariness, they had each other's backs. Giving his staff a short twirl, the purple masked ninja got into position for a fight alongside Michelangelo.
One Foot approached earning him a smack to the face from a bo before the younger terrapin's foot connected with his temple with a loud smack. Donatello smiled. With Mikey by his side they'd be out of there in no time. Then brown eyes were drawn too something orange by a crate. April was just where she said she would be when she called in the trouble this evening. Donatello grinned. She was staring right at him with that smile on her face and boy was he going to give her a show.
He thwacked one ninja on the calf, letting Michelangelo take him out with a punch, but it wasn't enough. He needed to really impress her! Donatello fell into a solo move he'd made up. Spinning his bo staff over his head to bring it down to strike at the opposing ninja while dancing back and forth almost boxer style. Right, jab this guy in the shoulder, twirl. Left, knock both of those guys in the head hard. He heard the two loud cracks signifying that those two would never get up again. Bring it up for another twirl, deflect that shuriken. Dodging a Foot Ninja's punch, Donatello heard an "Oof," less than a second before he slammed his bo into the attacker's foot only to crack the pole into the man's temple in the next moment.
Donatello turned to regard April who was shouting and pointing to something behind him. The purple masked terrapin crouched and swung his bo around for and abdominal shot meeting the resistance of a body and instantly regretting it. Mikey who was just recovering from the punch he had just received from the Foot Ninja was jostled sharply by Donatello's long weapon and met the wall behind him with a dull smack. He forgot that Mikey was behind him! How stupid could a genius be? Donatello blushed and turned back to his human friend only to see that the Foot had noticed her too and now had her captured. Stupid! First he utterly botched his new move and April probably thought he was a dork. Now he had given up her position to the enemy by smiling like a loon and taking out Michelangelo.
Donatello glanced back at Mikey who was shakily regaining his footing. Finding new resolve, Donatello decided Mikey could take out those goons without him. April needed him so he pole vaulted over the wall of enemies to pursue her.
Mikey's voice followed him, "Leo! He's doing it again!" The youngest of the turtles sounded panicked but Donatello could not bring himself to care. His head hurt as he chased after his human friend's captors.
The purple clad ninja hardly heard Leo's or Raph's answers and he certainly made no attempt to make sense of them. Leonardo: "We can't do anything out here. We just have to get home." Raphael: "Fearless. The humans, they're watchin' us."
All of the sudden, the ninja ahead of Donatello stopped and pulled out a needle, ready to inject it into the girl's neck. Howling, the purple masked terrapin lunged forward to knock the injection away from April again. That's right, he did this before, only this time his head jerked back of its own accord, pulling his body off of the ground a second later. "No!" He yelled with real force he did not even know he had. The needle burrowed deep into April's pinkish skin and she immediately turned grey and lifeless before she was tossed to the floor by ninja who disappeared like smoky shadows. Also falling to the ground, Donatello crawled over to the girl he couldn't save. He lifted her head with trembling hands, hating everything about her terrified expression. He gingerly closed her eyes and felt all over the face that he was denied during her life.
Donatello was choking on his sobs but no tears would escape his eyes as he held her body close.
Raphael's dark chuckle sounded in sync with his olive colored brother's tremors. It frightened Donatello further by escalating into a mirthless guffaw drawing brown eyes to lock onto the broadest mutant turtle's form. The red masked ninja's head was thrown back as he shook with his tainted laughter. It was all cut off abruptly to allow words to escape Raphael's shadowed face. "Ya tried so hard an' now look at ya. Ya couldn't save 'er Donnie. Ya gave up everythin' an' she didn't even like ya." Another round of laughter that went perfectly with the throbbing in Donatello's head sounded. Something caught the brown eyed gaze in Raphael's hand but Donatello could not tell what it was. Was that a strip of cloth? "What did ya think brainiac? That ya'd save 'er and what? She'd never like ya Don. Hell, we don't even like ya. Nah, I couldn't make ya live through that. I had to stop this torture yer puttin' yerself through. Y'understand, yer the genius after all." Raphael stepped further into the light and Donatello's jaw dropped open with a startled croak. Raphael was holding his mask. He was the one that stopped April's rescue, but that was not the most shocking thing brought to light. Raphael had a huge lump swelling from his right temple like some big greenish purple egg stuck to the side of his head. No one could survive a hit like that. Shell, Raph shouldn't have even been conscious after the blow that would be necessary to develop something like that.
"That's right Donnie, we are dead." Donatello turned to see his oldest brother striding out of the shadows in his graceful saunter. Donatello held tighter to the body in his hands. Leonardo had one katana sheathed but the other on was still in his competent grasp covered in blood to the hilt. He had only one visible injury but he was just as dead as Raphael. A hole in his leader's chest leaked blood like the tears he should be shedding. It was just where Donatello had stabbed a Foot Ninja.
Donatello's head swiveled back towards Raphael to see him limping towards him. He could remember it, smashing that guy's foot before nailing his temple. "I killed you." Donatello clenched his eyes shut and shuddered at his own admission. Another headache seized him but it was nothing compared to the pain in his heart.
Leo was the one to answer but his voice was fuzzy and light. "No, but you did kill him." Leo's proclamation hurt more than any of the headaches ever had. Brown eyes opened, knowing what they would see but still needing to see it. He filled Donatello's vision as a hazy sea green mess. Mikey. "It was you who let him die." Donatello remembered, he left him all alone to chase after April, not once but twice. He could remember the first time now. He left Mikey pinned down and saved April. Now, looking at Mikey's frightened and tormented face, his head stopped hurting. "You killed him." Leonardo repeated coldly.
Mikey's face remained frozen but again he spoke and somehow, his echoed words seemed realer than anything else. "He's doing it again."
Yes, Donatello had left them during a battle to chase after April. Donnie left his brothers to chase a girl.
Now his brothers were calling his name to join them in death. Even April was calling for him to die. Finally, he felt the wetness of tears but they never made it all the way to his eyes. Instead they took up residence in his throat to drown him. At least he would finally stop disappointing his family.
As explanation, a friend of mine irl wanted what she calls a 'good' OT4 fanfiction based off of the new series. Some of this could be wrong even though I have two I have two TMNT fans assistance in writing it. She wanted Donnie to have a nightmare about liking April before coming to realize he was really in love with his brothers. She said she liked this though it was not what she was looking for and she has been begging me to post it since. Just a warning, if this gets a negative response from the fan community, I will delete it. TMNT is not my chosen fandom.
More to come. ^.^