This is an AU one shot inspired by an episode of the anime Hatsukoi Limited. (Sorry, not really great with summaries here.) In the story, Allen is supposedly older than Lenalee (and Lavi), which I hope didn't ruin anything. Do enjoy!
"Lenalee, I'm leaving. Don't forget to lock up when you're done," a classmate called out.
Lenalee turned around, holding a pencil in her hand and a photograph of cherry blossoms in another while consenting with her usual smile. As the leader of the Art Club, Lenalee didn't have a choice. The school's annual festival was coming up and if they wanted to stand out during their showcase, she'll have to double up and work on her painting. Even though the other members weren't as enthusiastic as she was, she still wanted them to be proud of their own co-curricular activity.
"Sure. Bye." Lenalee waved her pencil at them before turning back to work. At times like these, she can't help wondering if picking a route towards Fine Art was a smart choice. She wanted to do a painting that feels exactly like his.
Looking up, she could see the paintings that were hung up for display in the Art Room, but the one that never fails to catch her eye every time is the one in the middle. The painting depicted a line of cherry blossom trees down an empty avenue and each time she looked at it, she couldn't help but feel extremely drawn. She wanted to do something that felt that sincere.
The only problem was that the student graduated last year. She'd asked the Art Club supervising teacher and even though she was disappointed at his reply, there wasn't much to be done.
How many times have she stared at this painting like this since she entered school? Countless.
How much did she practice; drawing, painting, and reading up on Art history...just to get closer to the painting? Impossible to keep track of.
And she bet the artist, Allen Walker, would have no idea either.
Just then, she heard the sound of the door sliding open. Ah, someone must've left something and came back for it.
"What is it? Left something?" Lenalee asked, not bothering to turn around, as she continued to sketch her field of cherry blossom trees and flowers.
"Yeah, I guess I left something."
The voice was oddly unrecognizable and out of bewilderment, Lenalee spun around. All she saw was a boy, his head full of white hair and donning some other school's uniform, walking towards her. She'd never seen him before.
"Uh...you are...?" Lenalee asked.
He ignored her question, instead asking her another. "Are you the only member left here?"
"Yeah...the others just went home." Lenalee said, while being seated on her stool. She looked up at him as he stood next to her and realized he had the Nihon University logo on his blazer. That alone was enough to blow her away. He must be very outstanding.
He leaned down to stare at her canvas. "What are you painting?"
Instantly, Lenalee felt her face grow warm, though she wasn't sure if it's because this good looking boy was standing so close to her or because she didn't want anyone to see her work, especially if it wasn't anything fantastic.
"It's nothing much," she hurried to say, "I'm still doing the basic sketch."
"Cherry blossoms huh? I like how you did the tree over there," he pointed. Lenalee knew a compliment when she heard one, but she didn't think her work thus far was anything commendable.
"Well...my painting's never going to be on par with that one up there," Lenalee said. They both turned to look at her favorite painting and once again, Lenalee was sucked into how calm and relaxing that painting feels.
"The one with the cherry blossoms trees?" the boy asked.
"Yes," Lenalee replied, her voice filled with admiration. Even though it wasn't her work, she felt proud about it. If only she could do something as wonderful...
The boy took a step forward towards the artwork. "I painted that."
Lenalee widened her eyes, unable to believe it for a second. Such a great masterpiece...actually belonged to him? So he was the Allen Walker, whose name she'd practically carved into her mind, along with every detail of the painting? And it never struck her before that he even looked like an arts person.
"I never thought it'd actually be hung up though...," Allen said doubtfully.
Lenalee almost knocked all her art materials over as she stood up. She still couldn't grasp the fact that she was actually meeting the artist whose painting she'd been so in love with for the past one and a half year.
"I...I really, really like that painting," Lenalee stammered, blushing. It was kinda weird to admit that, but she needed to say this, and he needed to know how good his work was. "It's so good to finally...finally get to meet you, senior. I'm not anywhere near but your painting has inspired me and...and..." She was blabbering already.
"Ah, thanks," Allen said, breaking into a broad smile. He seemed shy knowing that Lenalee was complimenting him, but he quickly added, "Hmm, how 'bout we try finishing your painting together then?"
Lenalee felt all the best feelings washing over her there and then. He was going to guide her along her painting! But what about his University work? Surely that would be too much to ask from him then...
"...I don't really have much to do before the new term starts anyway. Look at me, coming all the way back to my High school and trying to reminiscence the old days..." There was something exciting about Allen's eyes as he spoke and she was ready to oblige.
"Really? Are...are you sure?" Lenalee asked.
"Mmm," he nodded, "...uh, but your name is...?"
"Lenalee," she replied. "It's really a pleasure for me to be able to work with you, senior."
"Same here. But I'll get embarrassed if you keep calling me senior like that. Just call me Allen okay?" For that, Lenalee agreed.
And with just one afternoon, Lenalee felt like she learnt more than she ever did. All his skills, techniques and methods; he taught her impartially without any selfishness. Besides that, his company was really enjoyable, and she found herself telling him so many things about herself that she'd never share with anyone she barely just met.
Before he left, he promised he would come tomorrow as well. And for the first time ever, Lenalee anticipated tomorrow more than any other day, and she wondered why.
After all, tomorrow's only going to be a Thursday.
School had been more or less quite a breeze for today. Lenalee wasn't one to be picky about her subjects, even though she must admit she likes Home Economics and Languages more. And for once, she actually ignored lunch with her friends to get to the Art Room earlier. But what if he didn't come like he said? What if he decided he should be busy studying instead of helping a girl like me with her lame painting?
Lenalee opened the door, and surprisingly, he was already there. 15 minutes earlier to be exact.
"Hey Lenalee!" Allen greeted her with another mega watt smile of his. "You're early."
No, you are. Lenalee wanted to say that, but decided against it. "You really came! I...I didn't think you would..."
Allen laughed. There was something about him when he did that because it seemed to make any atmosphere brighter.
"I should be thanking you though. You came even though they were no club activities today. I almost forgot that the Art Club's only on Wednesdays and Fridays."
"Eh?" Lenalee raised an eyebrow as she settled her bag and books above an empty table. But truthfully, it didn't matter. She was going to need as much time as she can get to do her painting. Plus, she was getting help from Allen. That alone was enough to get her pumped.
"Alright, let's do the sky first, shall we?" Allen asked, passing her a brush. Lenalee took it and following all his tips and good advice, she found she was already getting better at painting.
"It's easier to do the clouds when they're half dry," Allen said. Lenalee followed and from the corner of her eye, she could see Allen grin.
"There, you're doing really great, Lenalee."
Lenalee blushed hard, but she was glad she had enough self control not to blurt out anything stupid. Somehow, hearing him say that made her feel really happy and her heart had this warm feeling inside. She didn't know what it was and couldn't explain it but this was the first time she felt like this.
And that feeling was insanely good.
"Allen Walker? As in, that Allen Walker, who did the cherry blossoms painting?"
"Man, you must be really good!"
"Excuse me; could you please give me some advice on my painting then?"
Art Club activities barely started a little while ago and already, people were all over Allen as soon as they found out he was the Allen Walker. Not that it wasn't good that the members were showing a deeper interest for art, but now, Allen would be busy helping everyone and that meant less time for Lenalee, isn't it?
Lenalee sat alone in her usual corner, swirling her brushes in the dirty paint water. Everywhere she turned to look, the other members were trying to grab Allen's attention so they could benefit from his help. She was the club leader. Did she not want them all to benefit?
Maybe.
Finally, after the three hours, everyone was packing up and ready to leave. Lenalee heard some of the guys saying how 'cool' and 'awesome' Allen was, and the girls gushing about how gentle Allen is when he teaches and wanting him to come again. Honestly, she wasn't jealous. Well...not really jealous anyway.
Allen stood at the door, wiping his hands on a clean cloth and was waving goodbye to everyone. I have to grab my chance before he leaves as well!
"Uh...Allen?" Lenalee piped, her head bent low from shyness. "I'm sorry, but if its okay...would you mind helping me with my own painting after this? I haven't made much progress today..." She already had her materials and paints ready, and she won't know what to do if he said he was tired and couldn't help.
Lenalee was almost afraid of how selfish and inconsiderate she sounded when Allen gave her one of his usual, warm smiles. "Sure. I was planning to stay anyway."
Lenalee's eyes lit up for some reason the moment Allen said yes. She had been doubtful earlier, but Allen's answer had erased those doubts. He was so understanding!
Together, they continued Lenalee's painting, with her doing the trees and him touching up the sky. She loved every one of his brush strokes, but somehow, she found herself more focused on Allen himself rather than his painting. When he turned meet her gaze, it caused her cheeks to burn and she quickly turned back to her own work.
But Allen didn't continue with his. Instead, he said, "You can finish the rest yourself right, Lenalee?"
Lenalee paused. What does this mean? Did it mean that he was going to leave and not help her anymore? There was still quite a bit of painting and touch up works to do. But most importantly...if he left, it meant she'd be painting on her own again. Why did that make her feel so messed up?
"...your finals are next week I heard. Besides, I don't think I'll be able to come after next week due to other commitments. Even though I said we're going to finish it together..." Allen didn't get a chance to finish his sentence before Lenalee felt the urge to cut in.
"I'll come anyway!" She half spluttered. "The times you help me paint are far more important than my tests! I...I..." Lenalee knew she must sound pretty impulsive, but her grades have always been good so she'll manage somehow. She simply couldn't let this be their last meet together.
"All right," Allen agreed. His smile was once again gentle and brought ease to her heart. Quickly, she thanked him with her head bent low and returned back to her painting. Knowing that he'll still come and this isn't going to be the last time she was seeing him was more than enough.
Over the weekend, Lenalee had been busying herself with only 2 things. The first was obviously to study like crazy for her tests. Nobody likes those, but nobody wants to do badly either. If she was going to try for Nihon University, she'd better not suck.
The second was miles away from the first. She'd been thinking about Allen, remembering the way he looks and everything he'd said. Even though Lenalee badly wanted to finish the painting as soon as possible, she'll think again and realize she didn't want it finished after all. She wanted this to go on forever, with Allen by her side, and them helping each other.
Monday came around faster than she anticipated.
Dipping her brush into the titanium white paint, Lenalee asked Allen casually, "...so, you said you won't be able to come due to other commitments next week. It's probably because you're preparing for college, I suppose?"
"No," Allen said, his tone suddenly turning softer. "...I'll be going overseas."
"Overseas?" Lenalee blinked. "Ah, you're studying abroad! That's so cool! Where will you be going?"
Allen stopped, holding his brush midair and didn't look her in the eye. Still, he continued speaking without much hesitation. "It's nothing to do with studying. There's a local organization which supports poor and desperate countries, so as a member, it's my dream to travel around the globe and spend my life helping these countries' people and children, by drawing and teaching art to them."
"Your life...?" Lenalee felt her throat go dry, and her voice coming out as a squeak.
"Yes. Paintings can capture memories right? Everything you see, feel and dream about...even someone's smile...it'd be just wonderful knowing that my painting can touch and help someone positively."
Lenalee's heart ached without her really knowing why. He would be off to do something he felt really passionate about. And helping people recover their confidence in life...that's something not everyone would be able to handle. Yet, her chest felt unusually tight, as if she might go out of oxygen soon. With her head bent low and her long hair shielding her face, she could feel her stupid tears rolling down the side of her face already.
"Lenalee? Lenalee, are you okay?" Allen asked. It was so obvious she was crying now.
Lenalee wiped at her face with the back of her hand, trying to stop, "Nothing...I'm sorry. I'm just touched I guess. You're really amazing."
"Touched?" Allen let out a laugh, "That makes me feel kinda embarrassed." But Lenalee meant it. After hearing what Allen wanted to do for life, she was lost for words.
Lenalee went off on an opposite direction from Allen, but she watched him go while standing at the school gate, staring till he disappeared at the end of the street. Behind her, she heard Lavi call out to her. He was a friend of hers and they've been classmates since elementary school. Recently, she hadn't been walking home with him.
"Who's that, a friend of yours?" Lavi asked, his bag slung over his shoulder.
"Mmm, he's a senior and alumni of the Art club, Allen Walker. He's an amazing painter and he goes to Nihon University."
"Whoa," Lavi said, looking impressed. "Nihon University eh? Isn't that the school where only very few of our school's graduates go?"
"Yeah. He's really something, isn't he?" Lenalee gushed. But her voice went smaller as she walked on, "...but instead of continuing his college education, he said he was going to volunteer himself by traveling and helping others overseas. People normally wouldn't make a decision like that."
Lenalee stopped at the end of the street, looking down at her feet. "He...he'll probably never come back again." Those last words felt really raw and painful, but she said them anyway. Lavi stole a look at her, and even though she looked composed, he knew his friend better than that.
"Ah, cheer up, Lenalee," Lavi said while giving her an encouraging pat on her shoulder. "I think this Allen friend of yours is pretty cool though. To be able to do something like that takes a lot of strength, y'know that?"
Lenalee understood. In fact, she looked up Allen for that decision. But why was she taking it so personally if she thought he made a noble decision? Then, she heard Lavi wave goodbye to her, saying, "See you tomorrow!" It was exactly what Allen said the first time they met before he left.
That's right. The painting's not done yet. There's still tomorrow.
For the next two days, Lenalee worked hard. The tests weren't as bad as she anticipated after all, and she got to spend her afternoons with Allen. She knew she had limited time with him, so every second was precious to her. It was just so easy to communicate with him that she wasn't ready for Friday. At least, today was still Thursday.
"...Other than doing Fine Art, I've got a diploma in piano actually. And food...I like all kinds of food," Allen went on and on about some other things about himself that Lenalee would never get sick of hearing. His life was so interesting, and he knew so many things!
"Is that so? You're really brilliant at everything, Allen!" Lenalee complimented.
Allen stopped short right next to a Sakura tree, the kind that bore cherry blossoms. They were taking a stroll at the local park after burning several hours painting again. But Lenalee would gladly stroll any place with him. She watched as lifted his eyes to settle them on her.
"Actually, I really wanted to finish that painting before I have to leave," he admitted, "But..."
Lenalee looked up at the pink blooming flowers, "its okay. We can still finish the trees and flowers at least, right? We'll be in time by tomorrow." She was being too positive for herself to believe, but she knew he needed this now.
"...Allen," she continued, as she met her eyes with his with a smile, "I truly respect the path you picked. So no matter what, please do your best, alright?"
Allen's face looked indescribable, filled with so many emotions that Lenalee couldn't grasp. The light wind was sweeping his hair, and his eyes were blocked momentarily by his fringe. However, he reached forward and enveloped her in his arms, hugging her tightly to himself, which really stunned her.
"Thank you," she heard him whisper into her ear, his lips so close to the side of her face that she could hardly breathe. "Thank you, really."
Lenalee felt her face burn from their contact, and this was clearly something she wasn't very used to. Besides, she'd never viewed him as an impulsive guy and she just said what she felt from the bottom of her heart. So instead of letting this continue like what a sweet moment might be, she pulled away from him, her heart racing. Not that she didn't like it when he held her, but...if she stayed in his arms any longer, she might not be able to accept his leaving the day after.
"Uh...see you tomorrow," she mumbled quickly and loud enough for his to hear before running off.
Why? What did she even do to make him want to...hug her like that? She'd merely encouraged him to follow his dreams, something he already knew. Yet, he thanked her! She could even still feel his breath next to her, and her heart pounded faster at the thought of it.
But tomorrow... Lenalee slowed down to a halt and realization hit her in the face. It would be the last time she ever got to see him.
As the last bell rang, students were practically jumping around the corridors in delight. Finals were finally over, after one grueling week of stressing their brains out. Again, Lenalee rejected her friends' offer for lunch and a shopping trip. Instead, she raced to the Art Room, running as quickly as her feet could take her. She didn't want to waste any time at all.
She just needed to see him again.
When she reached, she pulled the door open, practically expecting to see him there. Today, they'd be alone since nobody would come for club activities after a big final exam. Yet, she was faced with an empty classroom. Allen must be running late today.
Lenalee settled her things and school blazer on the table and sat down to wait. Yes, she was more than half an hour early, but that doesn't matter to her. What's important is that she got to spend much treasured time with him. And waiting for him like this might just turn out to be pretty fun anyway.
When she'd first sat down, it was only 1:15pm. Now, the time was ticking away. 1:30pm, 2pm, 2:45pm... She didn't understand. Why wasn't he here yet? Didn't he say he only won't be able to come from next week onwards?
Lenalee twisted about on her seat, playing with her hands. She didn't want to start on her painting if Allen wasn't already here. There, her painting sat on the easel bathing under the light afternoon brightness, but something caught her eye. Standing up and walking towards it gave her a better view. It was a note, purposely taped to the corner of the canvas. But more importantly was how different her painting looked all of a sudden.
Lenalee almost wanted to let out a small cry. There she was, standing in the middle of her very own painting with a huge smile across her face. Every feature was exactly like her, and she especially liked how her uniform was done. Allen must have painted all this! And he actually finished the entire painting! With her eyebrows furrowed, she remembered the note, unfolded it hastily and ran her eyes across the words.
Dear Lenalee;
By the time you read this letter, I'll have already left the country. I'm sorry for leaving without saying a single word, but seeing how happy you were while painting, I just couldn't tell you that I was leaving this morning.
In fact, I've been worrying about my choices in life only until recently. Everyone around me; my family, teachers and friends have disagreed with my decision, which left me confused and disheartened. I came back to my high school, because I wanted to recall my happiest times painting, and that was when I found you. I'm really, really glad I got to meet and paint with you.
I won't ever forget the parting smile and words you gave me before I left and sincerely, I want you to find someone in future that would let you smile like that forever. I guess...that no matter what happens someone across the globe will always love you. Take care and be happy, alright?
-Allen
Lenalee's face scrunched up in pain as she grabbed her things and took off. She ran and ran, almost tripping down the staircase and running into a cyclist along the road. The letter stayed crumpled in the palm of her hand, but this...this hurts too badly! She kept running forward, almost screaming out several times, but she wouldn't stop.
How could he? How could he leave without them even saying a proper goodbye? He'd given her so much, taught her so many things and gave her confidence...she could even remember how gentle his eyes were, especially the way he looked at her. And all these while, she'd never even realized how big his love was.
Lenalee ran till her chest felt tight and painful, before tripping and falling on a small, empty road. There she lay, unable to find the strength to get up and cried all the tears that wouldn't stop forcing their way out. Images of Allen's face kept appearing in her head; the way he smiled at her, the way he held her and the way he looks under a warm, evening sun. These were the memories she fear she might never be able to erase for the rest of her life, even if she wanted to.
So, very slowly, Lenalee got up on her knees. Her face was tear-stained, her eyes red and finally, after quite some time, she could feel her breathing regulate. Until now, she didn't even know she'd been sitting on an empty street of Cherry blossom trees. They made the memory feel even more raw and painful, but at least, it was comforting to know that Allen had left to do what he loved.
Maybe next time, she might meet someone new that she'll fall in love with. But to her, Allen was her first love. He was irreplaceable and like something precious, she knows she'll always have him in her heart. Always.