Author's note:

Things I shouldn't be starting/doing :

- This story;
- This story;
- This story;
- THIS STORY;
- Oh, did I say this story?

Anyway, it's been bugging my head for weeks now, so might as well type it down and be done with it. What can I say? Star Wars took over my life. I'll be updating my other work in progress in the POTO fandom, don't worry, but as I said for that one as well, I'm a flaky updater. College is a bitch, but my education is very important, and as much I hate to say this, it has a priority over my writing. Also, sleep deprivation is not helping, and when I have time to write, it's only late in the evening, precisely at the moment where my brain refuses to work. Gah.

This story is T-rated for now. It might go higher, but it's going to be smut-free, because I can't write smut properly (well that sounded weird).

Please note that I'm not in any way a SW expert. I do my best, and Wookiepedia is my friend, but while I did enjoy the films in my childhood, I really got into it when TFA came out. I've read a few things about the EU, did my homework for this fic, but if there are any inaccuracies, please don't throw flames at me, and just tell me politely.

Excuse any grammar mistakes or bad writing style you might see. English ain't mah first language, and even though I got better since I started writing fanfiction in English (because pah, who's gonna read fanfiction in French anyway?), there's still a lot of work to do… And I know I should get myself a beta, but I don't know where to look. Le sigh...

Also, big hi-5 to all the wonderful Reylo community on Tumblr. You guys write the best meta and fanfiction ever, draw the best fan art ever, and keep on doing so even with all the haters lurking around. You guys are an inspiration, and you rock. You rock so bad.

Also, please comment. I'm a bit afraid my fic might not be the most original around, even though I do have some ideas for later that might have not been explored yet, but while I do not want to look like I'm begging (except that I TOTALLY AM), comments and kudos keep me writing.

She is not alone.

However, it isn't like she imagined it.

It seemed so close, however, when she was with Finn, Han and Chewie. If it wasn't for the urgency of the moment, she would have cried all the tears of her body when they had come for her on Starkiller base. And even with Han dead, and with Finn in a coma, there was still Leia. Even today, she still feels that tight, motherly hug she had given her just before she left to find Luke Skywalker.

He wasn't too pleased she had found him, but the initial unease had thankfully faded away within the next few days, and her training had started.

There is still something standing between the two of them. Rey wanted to know why he hid on this faraway planet while Leia was desperately looking for him. She had heard again and again about how Kylo Ren destroyed everything Luke tried to build. She also knew now why he took the difficult task of creating a new Jedi Order on his shoulders.

The first victims the First Order made, nearly twenty-five years ago, were his own wife and his son.

On that same night, the First Order made itself known throughout the galaxy, establishing its menace of a reign of terror. Luke Skywalker also realized that his father was not the Chosen One and that there was no balance in the Force. He had discovered it, and at the most painful price. Despite him being known as the last of the Jedi, he definitely wasn't one in the proper sense of the word. Master Yoda had taught him only for a very short while, compared to the usual training a Jedi used to get. He knew the task was too big for him. And yet, with Leia and the Resistance against the New Republic's apathy…

Rey believes there is probably more to Luke's exile. But the last of the Jedi is a man of secrets.

He feels her frustration. He knows there are so many things she wants to know, about him, about herself.

He knows. But he can't tell.

There is that wall of secrets forbidding him from gaining her trust. And, with the knowledge that he is hiding something essential from her, she feels belittled. Luke can't help but become uneasy with her attitude, carrying a certain shade of darkness with it. For someone who's supposed to be trained the Jedi way, it is not a good thing.

It reminds Luke of his nephew rather painfully.

And Luke doesn't want to repeat the same mistake.

Rey bears her name well. Light radiates from her. He felt it the minute he sensed her presence on the island. But there is something nagging at her, growing, then regressing, something not quite bright – but somehow, Luke senses it isn't coming from her. It surprises him, but it's a good surprise. Rey has so many traits about her a Sith, or at least a stand-in for one, could take advantage of: her eagerness for praise, and her immediate drop of mood whenever she didn't receive it; her small fits of rage, or panic, or both at the same time (though nothing really terrible, compared to others), and that whenever she felt she wasn't in control, revolting against such a situation like a lost child forced to play grownup…

There is no passion, there is peace.

It is a sentence Rey repeats to herself, again and again. Yet, it doesn't feel right. A Jedi has no attachments. It's something Luke seemed to insist more and more on as the days pass. Yet, for Rey, such a concept seemed inhumane. After spending so many years alone on Jakku, wishing for someone to come back and take her away from that place, that her new goal is letting go of her attachments to help her friends… Rey chuckles at such an absurdity. It doesn't make any sense, and yet, what keeps her going is that she is doing all this for the greater good. It is a fair enough reason, she muses, though not as convincingly as she wants to.

But there is more.

It'd been a week since her arrival on Ahch-To that one night, she had awoken in a panic, pain piercing through her bones. It was worse than anything she had ever felt – and Rey's life had never been an easy one. All she could manage to do was to curl in a ball and just wait for it to stop, and all Master Luke could do was to put a soothing hand on her head, which was helpful, in a way, since she knew that there was someone near her, and that she wasn't drowning, but the torture was still there.

When it ended, she sobbed shamelessly, unable to mutter anything.

Why? It rang in her head, again and again.

I don't know. It's… was Luke's only response.

The next day, she feels empty. Not that kind of soothing emptiness after meditation. No. She could have been staring into a void, and just about to plunge without a second thought into it while knowing that doing so was to condemn herself to forever be slave to time, gravity and space, with only her somber thoughts as companions and eventually becoming maddened by them.

After staying for a week and a half on top of the mountain where Luke had built his home, she decides it is time for her to explore Ahch-To, or least, what is not covered with water. Might as well busy herself, think of something else, anything else than that.

There are mostly rocks, towards which she has developed a certain hatred to because of those boring, endless exercises where she has to stack them using the Force. There is some green, though not as much as she would have liked. She decides to look for flowers. They always made her happy, and whenever she managed to find or steal some on Jakku, it was like a little miracle reminding her that life was worth living, and that there was still hope.

She finally finds some – tiny white things at first, and then, as she goes further, bigger blooms, bigger than anything she has ever seen before. She can't help but let out a squeal of delight. It's the first good surprise she has had for a very long time. She plucks one, observing the white petals, to remark that they have lines on them. She wasn't sure, however, if they were purple or grey.

That despair she has felt earlier that day fades away, and she lets herself collapse in the middle of the flowers, canalizing as much joy and peace as she can to appease her anguish.

It works, and for the first time since she has arrived on Ahch-To, she feels peaceful.

Thank you.

She jerks up, the moment's haze broken. It's hard not to recognize that voice. It could have been a figment of her imagination, but if it's the case, it is popping up at quite the wrong moment. Why would she think of him now?

Kylo Ren remembers her indeed. And he knows more than she does.

Of course, he had been punished by the Supreme Leader. Of course, it was his fault if Starkiller Base had fallen. Of course, it was his fault if he had been beaten by a girl who had never fought with a lightsaber before.

Punishments become harsher with time. After all these years, he should know better. What Kylo Ren tells himself to endure them is that he deserves them because he wasn't good enough, and that his grandfather hated failure above everything else…

He had to heal on his own, of course. It had always been this way. And the wounds he had before having to confront the Supreme Leader weren't helping.

He knows what he has to do. But for the first time since what seemed like forever, he doesn't want to do it.

If Snoke discovers anything about who she is, if he does obey his order and bring her to him…

It makes no sense. He shouldn't discuss the Supreme Leader's orders. He knows something wasn't right, and not knowing what it was drove him insane, and in his crippled state, he can't even vent about it the way he usually does (bashing on everything surrounding him, of course). Meditating wasn't going to help. He can't help but snort that he has actually thought of it. To the point where he is, it isn't even an option. He has tried it so many times when Ben Solo was still alive, only to have those voices in his head distracting him and mentally whipping him whenever he tried resisting.

There isn't anger, nor despair anymore. Just emptiness, engulfing him like a void. He wished he could go mad just to gain some sort of unconsciousness and be free.

But today…

Today, he sees life instead of cold metal. There is that island again, and with the flowers he sees and feels in his fingers, it could be paradise. He feels her grin, and even her laugh. He can't help but twitch his lips upwards as well. He has forgotten how to really smile.

He tries to acute his senses. He can feel the sunlight on his face.

"Thank you," he says out loud.

It is at that moment that he senses that she jerks up, and the moment's magic is broken. She nags at the connection, trying to understand, and he reaches out as well.

Those words he had told her during the interrogation on Starkiller base comes back to them, since the exact same feeling of an energy they recognized in each other is there again.

Don't worry. I feel it too.

Rey tells Luke everything that night. This time, since he has a bit more details, he's able to give a diagnostic.

"I… I could be wrong, but I think it might be a Force Bond."

"A what?"

"A connection, if you prefer. Jedi masters and their apprentices often had those. It permitted them to communicate thoughts and images."

Luke prefers not mentioning the whole part about one being able to search the other's memory. This whole Force Bond matter is already enough for Rey to swallow for today. He knows everything a Force Bond could lead to. Everything is seemingly conspiring against him.

"But he's not my master," Rey snaps. "Even though he asked me to be his apprentice."

"You said you felt something similar to what happened today when he tried reading in your mind to get the map? It was your first exposure to someone who was Force-sensitive. He's strong with the Force. So are you. Sometimes, it all just… clashes. So this… bond is probably accidental."

Rey shrugs. The technicalities now seem very insignificant. "All right. So how do I break that connection?"

Luke seems definitely uneasy. "That is… a bit harder. Both parties must agree to break it, but… it isn't easy. The best way to break it is to have one of the members dying. But even then, the survivor feels emptiness afterwards."

Rey almost wants to add: "Even if we're talking about a major pain in the arse?" but she is wise enough to shut her mouth. Luke, however, seems to read in her mind.

"It is especially dangerous in your case. The stronger you are with the Force, the stronger the Force Bond is."

"So what am I going to do?" Rey's voice is practically breaking at this point. For once, she's a child begging for help, and Luke's distress is only enhanced by the fact that he clearly knows there is nothing much he can do.

"Be careful. Control your thoughts and your emotions. That's all I can say."

For a moment, a pang of revolt invades Rey. It's always the same stupid tune – control your emotions, control everything. She chases it away.

But there's that little pesky voice that's whispering to her that she's right, and that Luke is wrong.

For once, she doesn't suppress it entirely.

"Ben, this is Rey. Rey, Ben."

Ben Solo knew right away that that little shrimp couldn't be trusted.

Saying that he had run into her because he wasn't watching where he was going is a very weak argument. She's so tiny an adult could have stepped on her and not noticed. He had felt her crashing on his left leg, while her tiny voice screeched: "Hey! Watch where you're going!"

He was going to simply snort and keep on going, but he had suddenly felt a small fist punching on his leg. He stared in disbelief and annoyance at his attacker, a little girl… no, rather a shrimp. But something in that so-called little shrimp's stance stopped him. Her face was red, scrunched up in an expression so dead serious and angry Ben wasn't quite sure if it was hilarious or even downright terrifying. He had to remind himself for a split second that that little shrimp looked not much older than three years old.

He then saw Uncle Luke just beside her, and it was at that moment that the presentation was made.

But even then, they kept on staring at each other, like adversaries waiting and wondering who would attack first. It was only Luke's coughing that brought them back to reality.

"Well, you just met and you're already arguing. An apology won't hurt. An apology from both of you," he added, sternly, as he saw a glimmer of victory in both Ben and Rey's eyes.

Ben lowered his head and blushed, muttering "Sorry…" rather reluctantly. A pang of revolt came up. He dismissed it with not as much ease as he could usually manage. Rey remained silent. Luke cleared his throat, clearly showing it was now her turn. Her face scrunched up once more, and suddenly, she straightened and lifted her head, making her strangely looking older than she was.

"I'm sorry," she piped. "I'm sorry that you're big, and stupid, and… and… and…" She closed her eyes tightly, obviously thinking really hard. "And you have big ears and a big nose!" she lashes out.

Ben's ears heated. "I do not!" he shouted, before he even realized what he was doing. But he brushed it off, their stare contest resuming and lasting for ten seconds until Luke finally broke out of his shock and burst into laughter.

"You two should consider having your own holo show," he finally managed to say between two hiccups. "All right, then. Ben, can I ask you to show Rey around? She's just arrived here. And please… try not to argue too much," he added, before turning away, trying his best not to think too much of that little incident to chuckle again.

The matters he had to attend to, anyway, are anything but amusing.

He preferred, in order to keep himself serene, to remember, from a few hours ago, Rey curled up in his arms, asleep.

But that reminded him of a little boy just a few days old and a woman, the kind who'd tear the galaxy apart and order it to get back together with a single roar, at that moment humming softly at the little bundle of joy in her arms.

He could save Rey, at least. He had found her before the ones who had killed her parents did. According to her former guardian, she was only a few weeks old when it occurred, and said guardian had managed to sneak her away from a certain death.

"You better take good care of her," she had told Luke. "I'm gonna miss that little rascal, but she'll certainly be safer with you."

A certain sad satisfaction came across him, bringing him some sort of welcomed relief. He couldn't save Mara nor his son from the First Order. The Jedi order was soon to be resurrected so such a thing would never happen again, to anyone. Still, could it really fill the gap?

No. But at least he had saved Rey from an uncertain and dangerous future.

"So?" Leia's hologram asks, seemingly unfazed, even though Luke knows her well enough to tell that despite her calm and almost professional façade, she's just as anxious as he is. "Are you sure her parents are those whom we think they are?"

Luke is thankful Leia isn't too explicit. He doesn't want to think about it. It makes him sick, and in so many different ways. He hides half of his face in his metal hand, the cool metal bringing him a well-needed relief.

"Yes. There's no doubt of that. We must simply make sure the First Order never gets a hand on her. If they do… I don't want to imagine what could happen."

Ben was surprised how easy it was to have Rey trailing behind him. His steps were large, and that little shrimp had to practically run in order to keep up with him. He wasn't going to slow down for her, and anyway, she seemed like such a little ball of energy that, if such a thing was possible, he'd probably walk straight to Tatooine and she'd follow, and never get tired.

Her tongue never tired as well. He tried his best, he really did, but whenever he attempted showing a certain room to her, explain its use, and so and so forth, she just asked a question that had absolutely nothing to do with the place they're visiting or his explanations. The fifth time, he gave up, and he simply brought her outside.

Perhaps that was just what she needed. Fresh air. The first thing she did once she passed the door was to squeal and run straight ahead.

Ben let her be. As long as she didn't get out of his sight, it was probably fine. He went towards his favorite tree, sat down and crossed his legs to meditate.

The more time flied, the more it became difficult for him. He used to hate meditating. It seemed as if Uncle Luke always chose the moment where his legs itched him the most to have him sit down in perfect tranquility for what seemed like hours.

Thankfully, when it became even more boring than usual, his friend would appear just at that moment. It was welcomed.

But he felt like he was slipping, as his friend had become more insistent, more brutal, even. There were even some times where he had trouble making up excuses for him, and that what he did to him, what he told him, what he showed him just wasn't right. The more time went by, the more he felt nervous, unstable, while he dreamt of disturbing pictures and sights he certainly never witnessed, and that was what scared him the most, for he had no idea where they came from. He started telling himself that meditating was probably a good idea, in order to attain that serenity Uncle Luke bragged about all the time.

But it never conveyed any kind of peace.

He closed his eyes, forgetting about Rey for a while. He cleared his mind, trying to think of something that usually brought a fond smile on his features. Uncle Chewie picking him up as if he weighted nothing more than a feather and carrying him back to the Millenium Falcon despite his cries of joyful protest…

Red lightening through Luke Skywalker's chest.

His eyes snapped open, and he had to keep himself from screaming. The mental image was thankfully gone as quickly as it had come. Instead, the shrimp was just in front of him, holding out a bouquet of crumpled flowers to him.

Ben couldn't help but blink in astonishment. That was… unexpected, to say the least. Her mouth was twisted in a pout, but he sensed no malice. It was rather refreshing. All he could manage to do was to pick up the bouquet while awkwardly muttering "Thank you".

Rey's face lit up as she smiled. And at that moment, Ben couldn't help but muse on how well her name fitted her.

"What was that for?" he asked her.

Rey tilted her head. "Because you're a Big Stupid. But you're a nice Big Stupid."

Ben snorted. But this time, he was amused. "And you're a Shrimp. But you're a nice Shrimp."

Her face scrunched up again and she stuck out her tongue. And so did Ben. But it ended up with her giggling, and it being so communicative Ben couldn't help but do the same and laugh of his own childishness.

Luke smiled when he saw them come back in the building. It's hard not to, even after that conversation he had with Leia about Rey, but also Ben.

Perhaps having Rey around might help, and alter his worries as well as Leia's.

It was a rather charming sight. Rey had flowers in her hair, disposed in such an untidy way it was positively artistic. Ben was holding a messy bouquet in one hand. The other was holding Rey's, and he was careful to walk slowly while she strutted by his side. Luke remembered how he had attempted to take Rey's hand earlier when they had arrived at the Jedi academy, and that she had snapped it out. Now, Rey had actually reached for Ben's hand.

The Jedi academy got quickly used to see Rey following Ben Solo everywhere like a puppy. Though sometimes, it was she who dragged him around. Every time, it was when they went outside. She loved the outdoors, the green, and the flowers. She kept on calling Ben Big Stupid, and he kept on calling Rey Shrimp. But in their case, it became a form of endearment, in some way.

Ben's friend even seemed to fade away.

It was strange to say, but somehow, he was thankful for that.