chapter one – one problem at a time, please
Hajime remembers once when he was around five, asking his mother if ghosts were real.
"The only ghosts that exist, darling," she'd said. "Are the ghosts of our memories."
Well, she was dead now and apparently very wrong.
The ghost standing in the middle of his apartment stares at him. Hajime waves. The ghost gives him the middle finger.
Well.
/
Fact: the ghost's name is Fuyuhiko Kuzuryuu. He has blond hair and golden eyes. He likes to cuss, especially at his new roommate that he doesn't want.
Not a fact: he eats all the Cheerios in the kitchen. Merely a suspicion. But Hajime is going to catch him one day, he swears.
/
"Shouldn't you be writing?" Fuyuhiko asks him. This is the first time he has spoken since Hajime accused him of eating all the Cheerios.
"Yup," Hajime says, shovelling a handful of crackers into his mouth. Fuyuhiko wrinkles his nose in disgust. For a ghost, he is very snobbish.
"So…are you going to write?" Fuyuhiko is standing at the end of the couch that Hajime is sprawled out on. Fuyuhiko crosses his arms and glares down at him.
"Nope."
Fuyuhiko makes a huffing noise through his nose. "If I was physically able to pour a bucket of water on you, know that I would."
"This is the twentieth century," Hajime replies, not looking away from his TV which is broadcasting an episode of Adventure Time. "We don't use buckets anymore."
Fuyuhiko makes the huffing noise again, but more violently this time.
/
Fact: Peko is Hajime's (and apparently Fuyuhiko's by proxy) landlord. She is a tall woman with sharp silver hair that cuts off at her chin. Hajime is slightly scared of her, but only in that you-look-like-you-kill-men-for-a-living kind of way.
Not a fact: Fuyuhiko has a crush on her. He doesn't. He only likes her leather jackets. That's all.
/
"Hajime," Peko sighs. He thinks that she has a sigh especially dedicated to the way she says his name at this point. "We have more complaints of you talking to yourself again. Neighbouring rooms think you're insane."
"I probably am," Hajime muses. She doesn't look amused.
"I know that they say all writers are mad and they channel that madness into writing excellent novels, but please stop inflicting your madness onto everyone else."
Hajime just stares at her. She's wearing a leather jacket with a white t-shirt. Fuyuhiko so owes him one. "Do you have a boyfriend?"
Peko blinks at him from behind her glasses. He can hear Fuyuhiko call him a 'motherfucker' from across the room but he ignores it. "Are you…hitting on me?" she asks, eventually.
"You're not my type," says Hajime.
Fuyuhiko is standing next to him now, all anger confined in a tweed suit. "Stop it or I swear to god, Hinata, I will make your life hell," he hisses. Hajime continues to ignore him.
"Well," Peko says, looking vaguely confused. "I am single but – "
"Great, what's your type?" Hajime interrupts.
"Hinata, I swear – " Fuyuhiko starts.
"Um, blondes, I guess?" Peko says. There's a chain around her neck with a key on it and she wraps her fingers around it lightly. "I really don't understand where this is going, Hajime."
"Oh, that's it," Hajime says, cheerily. "Just wanted to know, I guess."
"Right," she frowns. "Well, just…keep it down, alright?"
"Yup," he replies and she walks away looking bewildered.
He shuts the door. Beside him, Fuyuhiko is staring at the door with his mouth open. "You're catching flies," Hajime says and heads towards the kitchen.
"God," says Fuyuhiko, snapping out of his stupor to glare at Hajime's back. "You're such a bitch."
Hajime only hums in response. All the Cheerios are gone again. God damn it.
/
Fact: Hajime has no friends or family. They're all dead.
Lie: he's absolutely fine with this. Absolutely.
/
"So," Hajime starts with a cup of coffee in his hands at three in the morning on a Tuesday in the middle of September. "Why are you…you."
"Genetics," Fuyuhiko replies like a smartass. He's buried his head into Hajime's sink, trying to unclog the piping. His ability to touch physical objects comes and goes and Hajime really doesn't want to bother Peko. Hence, ghost plumber. Hajime thinks he should write a book about it.
Hajime gives him a fake laugh and gets a kick in the shin that only half fazes through his leg. "I meant why are you a ghost, jackass."
"Don't insult me, I'm doing you a favour," Fuyuhiko grumbles.
"Excuse me, I believe it is you who owes me after I bought you the ice-cream you wanted," Hajime says.
"I couldn't eat it," Fuyuhiko deadpans, rolling out from underneath the sink to give Hajime a disbelieving look.
"Irrelevant. You haven't answered my question."
Fuyuhiko rolls back under the sink. "I don't know why I'm a ghost. I just am."
"Do you have some unfinished business or something?" Hajime asks.
"Doesn't everyone?" Fuyuhiko replies.
"Can you leave the apartment?"
"Nah," Fuyuhiko says, reaching out and grabbing a wrench. "If I take a step out the door, I feel like I'm dying."
"How did you die?" Hajime asks.
"Can't remember," Fuyuhiko grunts, turning the wrench around the pipe with all his strength.
"What's the last thing you can remember?"
Fuyuhiko opens his mouth to reply but the pipe bursting and exploding with a burst of water interrupts him.
Hajime feels the water seep into his blue fluffy socks. "Well," he says and sips his cup of coffee.
/
Fact: Hajime doesn't like plumbers. He also doesn't like mechanics.
Lie: it's because he just doesn't like people he doesn't know touching his stuff and being in his space.
Truth: his brothers had been a plumber and a mechanic respectively. He doesn't like to think about it too much.
/
The plumber that Peko orders them has bright pink hair and makes quick, jerky movements as though he's about to do an action but stops halfway through.
Fuyuhiko hates him. Hajime is delighted.
"Do you often do DIY?" the plumber asks.
"Oh yeah," Hajime replies. Fuyuhiko makes that huffing noise from beside him. "But, I'm terrible at it. Like, to the point where I shouldn't be allowed to touch anything in this apartment because I really am just a menace."
"I get the point," Fuyuhiko grumbles.
"Right…" the plumber says eventually and crouches by the sink.
"I'm Hajime, by the way."
"You know," Fuyuhiko says, spitefully. "Hajime Hinata? The name you will never see on any bookshelf because he'll never finish writing his book?"
Hajime almost laughs but holds it in.
The plumber doesn't seem to notice. He grins at Hajime in a way that reminds him distinctly of a Labrador. "I'm Kazuichi. I'm a plumber."
"I noticed," Hajime replies. The plumber – Kazuichi – somehow manages to grin even wider.
"I don't have any friends around here," Kazuichi says. ("I wonder why," Fuyuhiko mumbles. Hajime elbows him in a way that he hopes just looks like he has a cramp in his arm.) "Do you want to hang out sometime?"
"No," says Fuyuhiko.
"Sure," says Hajime.
He receives a glare from Fuyuhiko and another dopey grin from Kazuichi. He feels surprisingly happy.
/
Fact: Fuyuhiko used to be a part of a band called The Almost. They played rock songs with poetic lyrics that had double meanings.
Also a fact: they were terrible.
/
"I just don't understand why you thought it was ok for you to abuse your audience's ears like that," Hajime says, sitting at his Writing Desk That He Never Actually Writes At.
"Shut the fuck up," Fuyuhiko replies from where he's crouched in front of Hajime's bookshelf, critiquing its contents.
"Hey man, watch your profanity." Hajime points at the sign above his desk that reads No Profanity Zone.
"I don't give a shit," Fuyuhiko says. Hajime gasps as though he's scandalised. Fuyuhiko hides his grin behind a copy of 1984.
"Who wrote the lyrics?" Hajime asks, scrolling through his laptop to glance through the band's Wikipedia page.
"Me…" Fuyuhiko says, glancing at Hajime from the corner of his eye.
Hajime gives him a thumbs up. "They were the only good thing about the band," he says.
Fuyuhiko snorts and drops a book on human biology into the bin beside him. "I'll take that as a compliment."
There is a moment of peaceful silence between them.
"I guess you could say that you were almost good," Hajime says.
Fuyuhiko throws a copy of Wuthering Heights at him while Hajime cackles.
/
Fact: new people are moving into the apartment across from Hajime's. A boy and a girl.
Lie: Hajime didn't notice that they were attractive. Not at all.
/
"So, who are they?" Hajime asks Peko as nonchalantly as he can manage. She still hasn't asked him why he keeps asking her to come up to his apartment every time he wants to talk to her. He doesn't think he has the strength to tell her it's because his dead roommate likes her.
"Subtle," Fuyuhiko murmurs from where he sits on the couch. Hajime wonders if he ever gets tired of always wearing a suit.
"It's really not my place to say, Hajime," Peko sighs. "Not if you're looking for gossip."
"Just wanted to know their names, Peko," Hajime says, holding his hands up to look as innocent as possible.
"Quite badgering her, Hinata," Fuyuhiko grumbles, moving off the couch just so he can cross his arms at Hajime and look mildly threatening.
"Defending your girlfriend?" Hajime asks before he can stop himself.
Fuyuhiko flushes red and glares at him. Peko looks confused. "What?" she asks.
"Nothing," Hajime says, hurriedly. "Well, you look like you're in a rush and I don't want to keep you."
"I don't have anywhere I need to be – " Peko starts but Hajime shuts the door in her face with a cheery See you later!
Hajime leans against the door and covers his face. "Oh my god," he groans.
"You're such a fucking idiot," Fuyuhiko says.
"Shut up, you're dead," Hajime replies.
"Good one."
/
The girl who lives across from them in number 13 is at his door. She has rosy pink hair that is plaited down her back and has yellow flowers braided into it. She's dressed in a dress that cinches at the waist. Hajime opens the door.
"Hello," she says, cheerily.
"Hello," he echoes.
She thrust a tray of brownies into his hands. "Didn't want to seem like unwelcoming neighbours," she smiles.
"Right," he says. There are faint freckles on her nose. "Um, I'm Hajime."
"Chiaki." She's still smiling. He wonders if by spending too much time with Fuyuhiko has averted him to any look of joy from other human beings.
"Yes," is all he can think to say. She giggles. Her dress has little dogs patterned on it.
"Dear lord, you are hopeless," Fuyuhiko says from behind him.
"Oh, I wouldn't say that," Chiaki says. "I think he's doing quite well."
Hajime stares at her. Fuyuhiko also stares. She raises an eyebrow at them. "Yes?"
/
Fact: the girl from apartment 13 can see ghosts.
Not a fact: she's the sun in human form. Merely speculation. But Hajime thinks he can prove it. Probably. Hopefully.