The Coon's new enemy
Okay… I'm writing this is before Coon 3 has come out, so… I don't know what's going to happen in that episode so don't blame me if it doesn't match the show!
The city isn't what it used to be. It all happened so fast. Everything went to crap. It's like... everyone's sense of morals just... disappeared. Bad economy made things worse. The jobs started drying up. Then the stores had to shut down. Then a black man was elected President. He was supposed to change things. He didn't. As more and more people turned to crime and violence the town becomes gripped in fear. Dark times. The city needs protection. There is an animal that lives by night, searches the trashcans and cleans out the garbage. To clean out the trashcan of society I've chosen to become more than a man. I'm the hero this town needs. I am… the Coon! As the world plummets into despair the Coon fights to keep order intact.
Eric Theodore Cartman sprinted down the street, grinning at as the air whooshed pleasantly in his face. Little did any of his so called 'friends' know, he was a super hero; fighting to save their pitiful lives every night. He closed his eyes, just using his ears to listen to the wind, this was his spot light; no one could possibly mess this up for him. He had gotten rid of Mysterion long ago and those losers had kicked him out of Coon and Friends. He sprinted as fast as his chubby legs would let him feeling a sudden burst of anger. They had kicked him out of Coon and Friends, and he was the Coon! He didn't understand their logic; and he refused to try. The fact of the matter was, those fools had brought this on themselves. The Coon shouldn't be helping them, but yet… he was. Why? He had no clue.
His team of super heroes had needed him, but they let him go. Now look at them, they had been captured by Professor Chaos, and The Coon was the only one who could save them. Of course, because he had chosen to be a symbol, a role model, a hero, he would have to save them. It was his absolute pleasure to kick Professor Chaos into next week, but it was saving those traitors that disturbed him.
He had gotten a distress call from that retard 'Mint Berry Crunch' so he had come to save their hides. Little did he know, Professor Chaos was one of the captives. He was up against something much… much worse.
If you don't get why this is Kyle X Cartman just wait… you'll see.
*Evil Laugh*