Green eyes.
They wafted in front of my vision, making my eyes water. I couldn't look away, not ever again. They had that pleading, begging shine to them. Calling my name without words and pulling at my chest. My heart wanted to claw it's way out. I wanted to tear my eyes away, just for a second, just to make sure I could still breathe.
Never again, I told myself, chest aching with an unbelievable pain.
Make it stop, I begged, emotions forcing themselves into my voice for the first time in moons.
I was curled up, a tight ball of long grey fur with all the muscles in my body tense. My claws were clenched, digging into the soft pads of my feet and my jaw felt so stiff I could barely move it. My tongue was thick and heavy while my throat was so clogged that I could barely breathe. I could feel my stomach revolting inside of me, attempting to expel the memories.
To get rid of her, to forget and live my life normally.
But I couldn't. No, I could never.
Taking a deep breath, I rose to my paws and staggered outside into the clean, cold air of the night.
"I'm sorry," I whispered, leaning against the side of the warrior's den, "I'm sorry for everything I did to you."
A cool wind ruffled my fur, bringing the warm scents of the surrounding forest. My stomach rumbled as live vole tickled my nose. Sighing, I turned and padded towards the entrance to the camp, tail drooping and fur ruffled up.
Firewing sat at the edge of camp, staring into the darkness as she stood watch. As I passed her, she nodded at me and curled up, muzzle resting on her paws and green eyes trained on shadows. Sighing, I continued to wander out of camp.
The night's proceedings were a blur as I traversed the long twisting paths through the undergrowth. Everywhere I walked, those two green eyes and the pain that came with them followed me. Many times I was unable to breath and had to sit down and close my eyes, focusing on the thought of food.
It was dawn before I even scented something through my haze. Mouse! My hackles went up as I sunk into a low hunting crouch and moved silently across the forest floor. The ting brown rodent was nibbling at a small nut that had dropped off a tree and was paying absolutely no attention to me at all. I blinked and leaped, grasping it between my paws and snuffing it's life out with a quick blow to the neck.
The sudden pride of hunting and succeeding didn't last long as I gulped down the morsel and the weight grew heavy on my shoulders.
All I wanted was for it to stop. To leave me along so I could carry on with my own life.
That's when I smelled the smoke.
Fear took route in my heart as memories of fire and ash came flashing back to me.
I knew what I had to do.
My paws found their path through the forest as my mind strayed to the possibilities – it couldn't possibly be happening again.
Could it?
Growling, I thrust newfound energy into my limbs and made it back to the camp in record time. It was still early dawn and only a few senior warriors were out and about, organising patrols and socializing.
I paused; shocked by the fact that no one else had smelled the smoke.
"Everyone" I screeched, fear worming it's way into my voice. "there's a fire – I could smell smoke out near the two-legplace".
Shock was clear on all their faces before being replaced with a look of suspicion.
They didn't believe me—
"How can we trust you"? Birchfoot the deputy questioned, his brown fur erect as he looked down at me from the Highrock, his green eyes glinting in the morning sunlight.
"Please, we have to get out of here – it was really close" I cried, forcing my voice to become louder. Desperation grew heavy in my mind.
Leopardears came trotting out of the medicine den, his whiskers twitching, "Blossomfall, we can't trust you on this matter because of… of what happened to her"
I felt tears pricking at my eyes and I began to break around the edges. Somewhere in the back of my mind, I heard myself pleading and Highstar sending a patrol out to check.
Then all was dark.
I woke up in the medicine den, slightly dazed. Leapardears sat across from me on his nest, staring at his paws. It was sun-high outside, and it had not been long since I blacked out.
Paws thundered just outside the camp and Finchflight came dashing in, her grey eyes wide.
"The fire – the fire, it's here, it's real!" She cried and started explaining to Highstar who had leaped down from his den on the cliff-face.
"We must go." He said, and began rounding up the clan.
"Are you okay? Can you hear me"? Leopardears' voice was next to my head and I flinched at the closeness of it.
I said yes and we got up and joined the rest of the Clan.
Finchflight was in the centre, explaining where the rest of the patrol was. When everyone was there, the Clan left, everyone helping each other and encouraging everyone to go further and be happy and safe.
I was exaughsted enough not to even begin thinking about that day. When the fire was here and real and burning—
I felt my gut clenching as the smoke wafted on the breeze bringing the stench of death.
I stopped, staring at the ground while the rest of my Clan trudged by, determined on living.
Because I saw, in my mind, those green green eyes. Begging me to help them, begging me to tell them I was sorry.
When I looked back up – I was alone. All alone except for those green eyes staring at me.
Her body was silver, glowing like the stars in Silverpelt. She smiled, trailing her tail along my back and telling me that I was all right.
The heat of the air began to intensify, but I wasn't paying attention. I was focused on her. On my sister.
"It is my fault your dead," I said, looking at my black paws. "My fault".
"No it isn't." She whispered, eyes glinting with sadness.
I could feel the heat on my pelt now and hear the roaring of the flames.
"If I hadn't shouted at you, you wouldn't of been killed." I sobbed, falling to the ground.
"No!" She insisted, blinking at me.
I could see the orange flames licking at the tree trunks behind me. That's when I saw the skeleton.
The fire had burned away the foliage covering it and revealed the pale white bones of a small she-cat. I held my breath.
This was where she had died.
Something then and there clicked in my head. I felt cold. Emotionless.
I turned, and walked into the flames.
I had been my fault she died. I deserved to do so as well.
Hello all. This is my first story! Plzplzplzplz review! I"ll love you so much! :]
Thank you – Winter.