Disclaimer: I, of course, do not own anything Star Trek besides the poster hanging up in my room.
AN: Beta'd by thee lovely Ravyn Stormwatcher. I should probably stop threatening her life since she does so much for me. Also, let me note, that although this is not a songfic, it is based on the lyrics of a song. They provided excellent story for me to play upon.
Need to Breathe (1/1)
Hihi Ren
He looks towards the clock and the other's eyes follow.
"It feels like we're moving backwards," he says. The other one grunts. His eyes instantly dart down at the shuffling feet he owns. It's so tense and it's never been like this. It's like everything they had built up was cut and came crashing down.
"Bones," he murmurs but that's all there is to it. What happened to them that put them in this situation?
Everything has stopped and it feels like even the Enterprise has dropped warp. It feels as if everything is stretching nakedly in front of them but it's too much truth to handle.
How many chances had he wasted?
He knows the other can't stay here where things became unclear, but they don't have many choices.
"Can we bide our time? For two more years?" He asks, unwilling to lose the best thing he's got.
"Say enough to change my mind, Jim," the other replies. His blue eyes gather under the blonde locks and his teeth chew around his tongue. The other looks at him forwardly, unabashed, with the chocolate orbs daring him to speak.
"Maybe, maybe we could change," he says, "Get back on our feet and then, and then…"
"And then what, Jim? Pretend we're the same?"
"We can run away," he says. "When we make it back home, we can run away. Be on our own." The other looks at him and snorts.
"What? Just break out, buy a Caddy and think that none of this happened?" The other reasons, "That's your answer? Just run away at the end of the five year mission. Are we to avoid each other for the remaining two years, Jim? This doesn't fix anything."
"What went wrong, Bones?" He questions.
"What didn't go wrong?" And it's silent. He knows it's his fault and he can't help it. He can't help himself. He can't help who he is.
He can't help loving Bones.
"I could change." He wants to be. He wants to be better. He wants this to last and he wants to touch Bones.
Just to let the other know.
"There's potential; we can do it again," he says softly to the other, trying to capture something with his eyes.
"It's easy to find potential in what was before," the other replies. And he plummets a little. His teeth chatter almost silently and they stare stiffly at nothing. He's breathing big and deep and it escapes out of him in a loud expression. He looks over and reaches out for the other, a hand grasping for a pair.
And they hold and intertwine like the other doesn't want too but doesn't mind.
"Can you wait long enough?"
There is a noise of exasperation and a sigh of defeat. "Yeah, kid. I'll always wait." There's a smile on his face and the other snorts again and rolls his eyes in typical Bones fashion but it's okay.
Everything is okay.
Because he turns and presses his lips to the other man's and they don't need anything more than that. He kisses the other with something more - a promise - and he knows it's all okay. That they can just run away.
AN: I hope you honestly like it because this was one tough cookie to write. The first attempt didn't look anything remotely like this, and if anything, like an ugly baby. Please let me know how I did by reviews. Reviews are love.