Hello everyone!
How are you doing this fine evening? Excited for the mid-season finale because I am!
This is my first Arrow fanfiction and I was a little bit afraid to upload this because the writes of this fandom are so good that they probably write way better stories in their sleep.
I know that the title is a bit lame. I was listening to The Fray when I started this fic.
I would like to thank my friend Quen for looking over the story but English is still not my first language so please be nice.
Disclaimer: Unfortunately, I only own my mistakes and not The Arrow.
Enjoy!
Over two months.
72 days, 1728 hours, 103.680 minutes and still counting.
That's how long it's been since Oliver left Starling City to go on a duel with one of the most dangerous men that has ever walked the Earth, the Head of the Demon, if not the Demon itself.
1728 hours since he walked away from Felicity with only a lingering forehead kiss and an unexpected but sincere "I love you." An "I love you" that she felt too but didn't get the chance to reciprocate because by the time her brain registered the words, he was already gone.
Diggle and Roy found her 30 minutes later, standing frozen in the same spot, rubbing her thumb against her forefinger, a nervous tick she'd picked up from Oliver.
They said nothing to her, just hugged her before gathering their things and leaving her alone to her thoughts that seemed to bounce back to the overly quiet and cold walls of the Foundry.
The next couple of days passed in nothing more than a blur. Between her day job at Palmer Technologies, her night job with Roy and Diggle (the second man often suited up as the Green Arrow to not raise any further suspicions as the media were already talking about Oliver Queen fleeing the country, they didn't want anyone to connect it to the Arrow's disappearance) and worrying over Oliver's well being, the days seemed shorter to her.
That was until that fateful night when Malcolm Merlyn walked down the stairs of the lair with a smile on his face that was way too evil to be good news.
Diggle was the first to see him, clicking the safety of his gun and pointing it at him, followed by Roy who drew back his bow. Felicity just stood up from her chair, crossed her arms over her chest and stared back at him. She had not been in the mood for much lately, let alone a confrontation with Oliver's nemesis.
"What do you want Merlyn?" she asked, her voice laced with such vemon and coldness that would give Oliver's voice modulator a run for his money.
"Ah, Felicity Smoak, it is a pleasure to finally meet you."
"The feelings are not mutual so tell us whatever it is that you want and then leave."
"You know, I always wondered why Oliver was attracted to you, because you're not his usual type but now I have to admit that I get it, you're a fierce one Miss Smoak."
"And you came all the way down here to tell me that? You shouldn't have bothered really, I could have still lived without knowing that you approve of me." She heard Diggle and Roy snort at her reply and Merlyn laugh.
"Touché, but no, I'm not here for you, I'm here to tell all of you" he locked eyes with all three of them before his gaze rested back on Felicity "that Oliver Queen is dead."
The breath was knocked out of her chest. They had all tiptoed around the prospect of Oliver being dead but no one had dared to say it out loud.
"And in here" he motioned to the duffel bag that seemed to come out of nowhere, "is the weapon that Ra's Al Gul used to kill him." he unzipped the bag and pulled a sword. He placed it on the med table, the sound of metal on metal echoing around the lair."If you don't believe me, you can check for yourself. Good evening everyone."
As soon as the door closed behind him, Felicity moved closer to the sword in question. It was covered in dried blood. Blood that if Malcolm Merlyn was telling the truth, belonged to Oliver. Something that couldn't be possible, because if it was, it would mean that he was severely injured during the battle and she highly doubted that the League of Assasins had any doctors laying around ready to take care of their enemies, for lack of a better word. But speculations weren't helping her nerves or her blood pressure. Running the blood's DNA against all the databases so that it could not match Oliver and she could go back to her own research on his whereabouts, would.
Fortunately, they didn't have to wait long as her computer beeped signaling that the results had come through.
Felicity could feel Roy's and Diggle's eyes on her urging her to open the file, which she did. Only for her to regret it half a second later because Oliver's mug shot starring mockingly back at her was the last thing she wanted to see.
"No, no, no" she repeated again and again as she felt the earth shift from underneath her feet.
"Diggle, please tell me that you see what I'm seeing and that my mind is not playing tricks on me. Because this can't be happening, it can't be true."
"I'm sorry Felicity." Diggle said as he placed a hand on her shoulder, trying to offer her some comfort.
"Don't be because this is a mistake. I'm going to prove it to you."
But no matter how many times she ran the blood against Oliver's DNA, they always matched. Only after his face flashed on the screen of her computer for the 8th time did it finally hit her.
Oliver was dead. For real this time. She was never going to see him, touch him or even argue with him ever again. She was never going to see his rare smile or hear his even more rare laugh.
"He's really gone." she whispered and stood up from her chair and approached the glass case that contained his green suit, the suit that was never going to be worn by its rightful owner ever again.
"Oliver is dead John."
"I know, I know." he replied and he gathered her in his arms as her legs gave out on her and sobs wrecked her petite frame.
Diggle himself blinked away his own tears. Tears that did nothing to change the fact that today he had lost a best friend and brother.
That today Starling City lost its irreplaceable protector.
At the same time, thousands of miles away, in a small cave, Oliver was being nursed back to health.
Maseo was the one assigned by Ra's Al Gul to clean up any remains of the battle, including Oliver's dead body.
Only that when he found him, he was barely breathing, but barely breathing was a long cry away from being dead. He was sprawled on the ground, blood oozing from the wound on his right side, painting the snow that surrounded him a deep crimson.
But what drew Maseo's attention were Oliver's eyes which didn't portray fear of dying like he expected, but regret, probably over the things that he didn't get to do or say before he climbed the mountain.
Regret hit Maseo too because he himself was one of the people responsible for turning Oliver from a boy who had survived a shipwreck and a year on a hellish island, to a man ready to do anything that Amanda Waller ordered him to do.
Maybe finding him alive was the universe's way of giving him a second chance to redeem himself not only for destroying Oliver's life, but for destroying the lives of millions of other people.
Looking down at him, he noticed that he'd closed his eyes. Fearing that he was too late, he felt his neck. Thankfully, there was still a faint pulse. Patching up his would as best as he could, he covered his body with his jacket and then made his way to find an old man who lived there nearby. He had medical knowledge and was always happy to help Maseo out.
Together they managed to carry his dead weight to the man's home. Maseo helped the man treat to Oliver's wounds before heading back to Nadra Parbat. He couldn't stay any longer, from fear of Ra's finding out about him.
He was too busy with the Leauge's businesses to visit them but he did get updates on his well being. The only other time that Maseo and Oliver met was almost three months later, when he provided him transport to Starlight City.
No words were exchanged between the two men, there was no need to after all. There was too much history between them and they had said everything they wanted to years ago.
After reaching his hometown, Oliver went straight to the place where the person that he'd missed the most would be.
Over the course of the months after their encounter with Malcolm Merlyn, the three remaining members of Team Arrow tried to go on with their lives. Felicity continued doing both jobs but Oliver's disappearance had taken a toll on her. She barely slept more than 4 hours per night and ran entirely on coffee.
Diggle took notice of the chance in her behaviour so he had Layla ask her to become her maid of honour, thinking that giving her a difficult project, such as planning a wedding was, would keep her mind occupied with happy thoughts and it also gave Layla the opportunity to keep an eye on Felicity.
One late night, a crying Thea Queen waltzed into the lair much like her biological father had done a few weeks back.
Felicity, as usual, was the only one left in the Foundry, hacking into Canada's radio frequencies to see where the plane that Oliver had boarded 20 hours after leaving Starling City had landed. She was a few clicks away from breaking through their last firewall when her second monitor sounded the alarm that someone had broken in.
Grabbing the gun that was strapped under her desk (she mentality praised herself for thinking of that, one too many people had already tried to kill her while in the safety of the liar) she stood up and turned around and aimed the weapon at the intruder.
Only that when she turned around, she didn't come face to face with a villain, but with Thea.
Wrong Queen she thought, but quickly dismissed it when she took in her appearance. Unruly hair, wrinkled clothes, red puffy eyes, all signs of curling into a ball and sobbing for hours. The other woman supported a look that Felicity had become awfully familiar with.
"Thea?" she said as she dropped the gun on her chair and approached the younger woman.
"Why didn't he tell me? If he had, then none of this would have happened, I wouldn't have lost him again. Why did you let him go?"
"Slow down, you're not making any sense." It was the second time she ever said that to a Queen.
"I know the truth Felicity, the whole truth. I know that I... killed Sara, that Oliver is-was the Arrow and that you, Roy and Mr. Diggle help him out. I also know that Oliver went on a duel with Ra's Al Gul so that he wouldn't come after me."
"That's not-"
"Don't try to deny it."
"I wasn't going to, I just want to ask you how did you find out?"
"I came across a video of me... shooting Sara on dad-Malcom's laptop and then I confronted him. He didn't even feel sorry for manipulating me like that. God, Oliver died for me and all I've done was lie to him. I'm such a horrible person." she said and tears began to fall down her face. Felicity gathered Thea in her arms and tried to comfort her as she broke down.
That night signaled the begging of very strong friendship between the two women.
When they weren't fighting crime together (Thea had told them all about her training and had joined team Arrow, soon followed by Lauler) they spent their time either doing some relaxing activities or exchanging stories about Oliver. Thea shared tales of the old Oliver and the trouble that he and Tommy would get into. Felicity could sense that Tommy was still a sensitive subject for Thea so she didn't push her for more details. On the other hand, she shared her own stories of who the post-island Oliver was and how he sacrificed his own soul to keep Starling safe.
And tonight was no exception. Afrer some work at the lair, they had a few drinks at Verdant and then she headed home, where a number of house chores patiently waited for her arrival.
When she finished those, she changed into her pj's, brushed her teeth and picked up her tablet, ready to continue tracking Oliver. She was about to sit down on her couch when there was a knock on her door. She glanced at her wall clock and noticed that it was past midnight.
Who would come to visit me this late in the night? she wondered. It was definitely not a member of team Arrow because she was usually the one who alerted them of a new case and not the other way around.
What if it's a burglar? continued the voice inside her head.
Yeah because robbers knock on their victim's doors and ask for permission to be robbed. Pull it together Smoak and open the damn door.
Taking a deep breath, she placed her tablet on the coffee table and closed the distance between the living room and the door. She unlocked it and turned the doorknob.
On the other side, stood the man that had changed her entire life and had given her a purpose, the man who she loved more than anything else in the world, the same man she dreaded she would never get to see again.
"Oliver?" she whispered, not believing her eyes.
"Felicity." he replied, the corners of his mouth curling into a mouth.
After a few seconds of just staring at him, she placed her left hand against his cheek and her left hand on his chest, above his heart. She felt both his untrimmed beard scratch lightly at her skin and his heart beat steadily underneath her palm.
Only when he curled his fingers around the wrist of the hand that lay on his face and she felt the oh so familiar warmth that she had missed seep into every cell on her body, was she convinced that he was truly alive and not an illusion.
She let out a sound between a laugh and a sob and launched herself at him. She wrapped her arms around his neck, nuzzled her face to his shoulder and snaked her legs around his torso.
Oliver lost his footing for a moment but recoverd quickly and placed his hands on her back, pressing her body closer to him.
She inhaled deeply and his unique scent invaded her senses. She felt the missing piece of her heart that was Oliver click together with the rest of it, opening the way for tears of relief to slip past her drop pores and into his sweater.
She barely registered him closing the door and settling down on her couch because she was too engrossed in his voice, whispering words of comfort in her ear while his fingers drew random patterns on the small of her back.
"I'm so sorry" she said, a few minutes later wiping off her tears. "You're probably hurt and I'm crying. Not the welcome that you expected, if you expected a welcome at all. Come think of it why wouldn't you expect a welcome? Only if you'd informed us that you were coming we would have thrown a party for you and I'm babbling which is going to end in 3,2,1. Why didn't you stop me?"
"I missed listening to you rumble."
"For what's worth, I missed you too. We all did."
"You died Oliver." Felicity whispered after a pregnant pause. New tears began to fall and Oliver's hands moved from where they caressed her arms to cup her cheeks, wiping the tears away.
Felicity unconsciously leaned into his touch. "Merlyn told us one night that Ra's killed you, he even brought a sword with him that was covered in your blood. And for a second I believed him, for a second I thought that I really lost you but then I remembered that you told me that I would never lose you and I held into that hope even though everything pointed out that I shouldn't."
"I'm sorry for hurting you."
"Don't apologise because I did a lot of thinking while you were gone. How I should have done something to stop you or convince you to wait until we found another way, but in the end, I always came to the conclusion that you did what you had to in order to protect Thea and I get that."
"Thank you for understanding."
"You're welcome but I'm not done talking yet."
"Ok" he laughed.
"Losing you triggered something inside of me, it made me reconsider my whole life. The decisions that I've made and those that I haven't. There was one thing in particular that I regretted the most not doing."
"What?"
"Not saying those 3 words back at you before you left because I didn't want you to die wondering about my feelings. So I swore to myself that if by some miracle you returned, I would say it back. Unless you don't feel the same way anymore, which is cool I guess, maybe you're second near death experience changed-"
She was silenced by Oliver covering her mouth with his. When he pulled away, he rested his forehead against hers and stared at her blue orbs.
"Felicity, I love you. Only you."
"I love you too Oliver."
Oliver felt like his heart would explode from happiness. He already knew that Felicity had feelings for him but he was afraid that h'd played with her heart too many times for her to want him anymore.
"Now that we've cleared that out, I have a proposition to make and just a heads up, I won't take no for an answer." she told him.
"Ok."
"You and me are going to really try for a relationship this time. You won't freak out and dump me every time someone tries to harm me because I've chosen this life Oliver. Besides, my life is already at risk, being with you is not going to change that."
"You're very important to me Felicity which is why I have to protect you."
"Oliver, I can take care of myself."
"I know that you can but-"
"No buts, I'm not going to let any of your lame excuses or any criminals for that matter get in the way of our happiness. Oliver listen to me" she said, cupping his face in her tiny hands.
"Life is short ad it's even shorter in our line of work. You might be back now but no one can assure me that you won't be killed while you're patrolling at night."
"That's why I have Roy, to watch my back."
"Still, you never know, which is why I prefer to spend one day being with you than years wondering what could have been. Don't you want that too?"
"Yes."
"Look, I know that you have some commitment issues and I'm not asking you to label whatever we have. All I want is for us to be more than just friends and partners in crime fighting. I want you to take me out on dates in fancy restaurants, I want you to sit with me on my couch and watch my favorite tv shows with me. I also want to be there when your demons visit you at nights so that I can chase them away. I don't want to plan the future, I just want to live in the present, with you."
"I want that too."
"You're not saying that so that I can stop hawking you, right?"
"Partially yes." he said and Felicity punched him in the chest playfully.
He caught both her hands in his and intertwined their fingers.
It was amazing how her small hands fit perfectly in his own.
"They say that during those few moments prior to death, your whole life flashes before your eyes. It's true. Before I lost consciousness, I saw flashes of my family and you."
"Me?"
"Yes because walking away from you was the hardest thing that I had ever done as well as the stupidest."
"I second that."
"Of course you do. Felicity, coming back to you, righting my wrongs was what kept me alive, what urged me to keep fighting and not give up. Even from thousands of miles away, you saved me. I'm so lucky to have you in my life that I'm going to fight for you."
"Does this mean that it is official then?"
"Yes."
"You and me, me and you, no backing down when the first danger arises."
"No, I promise. I love you Felicity and I'm not going anywhere tonight, tomorrow or any other day. You're too important to give up on you. And just to reassure you, if you ever feel like I'm backing down, you can have Diggle knock some sense into me."
"Oh, I won't need Diggle for that. I'll just use my loud voice."
"That will definitely work."
"Speaking of Diggle, don't you want to call him, tell him you're back."
"I don't want to disturb him. I'll visit him tomorrow. Besides, tonight is our night."
"You're saying that I have you all for myself?"
"Entirely."
"Good to know." she said and leaned down to kiss him.
This kiss was different from the other two that they had shared, because in this one they poured every emotion, all the unsaid words and special moments that they'd shared and a promise for what was to come in the future.
Soon, the kiss got heated and clothes were being removed.
"Felicity." he whispered, trying to push her away.
"Yes Oliver?" she asked, not stopping the exploration of his throat.
"We should stop."
"What? Why? Oh God, you're injured aren't you?" she said and tried to untangle herself from his body.
"No I'm fine, it's not that." he replied, as he hold into her thighs to still her movements.
"Then what is it?"
"This between us, is very important to me and I don't want to ruin it by sleeping with you tonight."
"Oliver, we've been doing this dance around each other for over two years now and we both know that tonight is not going to be a one time thing, right?"
"Right."
"So why wait?"
"Are you sure?"
"Never been more sure for anything else in my entire life. Oliver, I want you to make love to me."
"As you wish." he finally said and picked her up before heading to where he assumed was her bedroom.
So, what do you think? Hate it? Love it? Let me know!
Until next time
~F