十二国旗－計大刻 (Twelve Kingdoms: Fanfiction)
一文 (Chapter 1)
用権 (In You Province)
"Tentei has bequeathed,
Another fruitful year -
Sing Sekiraku -
Let the heavens hear!"
As if to mingle with the joyful hymn, the summer breeze answered with a gentle sweep across the verdant rice plains, driving the soft green stalks in a graceful dance. The women giggled as tiny droplets of water showered on their feet. The sun was perfect for hanging the freshly washed clothes to dry. Children ran to and fro carrying little grass baskets of vibrant red and golden berries with occasional dandelions and wild sunflowers from the rolling hills a short hike from the humble village. You Province had never been this peaceful after the stormy reign of the previous empresses.
Without a single youma lingering beyond their rickety wooden fences, each family could gather everyone outside to bask under the clear sky without fearing an attack. Kei, currently ruled by Empress Youko, the Red Child, truly manifested the prosperity of a land proud of following the Way. It has been ten years since she took her rightful place as the Queen of the easternmost kingdom, and the earth has observed intently how its barren fields blossomed with colors of life. Judgments have been passed around reaching even the ears of the southern province - almost no one would want to rock the boat complimenting the marvelous job exhibited by the Royal Kei.
The city of Gyouten was miles away from the tiny section where the village belonged. No one has seen Her Highness personally. But You Province has started to flourish this much as she ascended the throne, and the people were contented like the mild wind passing - well, except for a small household located at the abandoned woods at the farthest end of the village. No one but a young woman lived there by now as the family of five barely escaped from the youma siege during the fake empress Jyoei's reign. Neighbors sometimes would visit her to see how she was faring, but most of the time to consult her about certain health problems.
Even at the lane of comfort, You Province still lacked a few basic necessities such as qualified doctors. The whole region had only one, and he was often out to Gyouten to bring and look after the fatally ill as they were transferred to better hospitals. People had nowhere to go but to the old shack with a very bad-tempered curer.
Elders called her Shinkai by her given name, but the village children addressed her as "Keirin". When asked, the little ones reasoned that if the Kei Taiho had been a woman, he would be as cranky and stiff just like her. But unlike the right hand man of the Empress, the girl was just believed to be plainly afraid of the crowd rather than strict. The villagers however did not mind much of Shinkai's attitude including her messy ebony black hair as she never turned down any patient who stepped beneath her eaves. Deep inside, as the people were concerned, she was a very benevolent young woman. It was really what she has gone through that kept her from opening to others to relieve the emotional burden. Nonetheless, altogether, her neighbors loved her.
Shinkai on the other hand had no interest in their affection. Her conscience just honestly cannot be out to rest whenever someone knocked on her door. She gave everything she could offer to the people. But lingering inside her mind was a threat she longed to forget from a distant memory.
They'll die eventually. All of them. Just like that night when you had to burn them alive.
Whenever her horrors racked her brain for good, Shinkai had to shove her special herbal medicine to the patient and drive them back. This was the only chance that her "sage" hands failed to work their miracle. Her foster father was the real medicine expert so the title never seemed to ring sweetly in her ears, and he developed the formula of her secret mix. Kouryuu was used to be looked up by the villagers for the same skills that they now appointed to Shinkai. But unlike his daughter, he was more sociable and always seen in his cheerful smiling face. He taught everything that Shinkai knew about curing diseases.
Since Kouryuu, her foster mother, Eiri, and two older foster brothers lost their lives, she alone survived to continue the family legacy. For the eighteen years of her existence, Shinkai believed that this was the duty that Tentei gave her, and she continued to hold that truth in her heart even though it seemed that the heavens had already betrayed her by taking her precious family.
A duty is an oath that is mostly one-sided, which purpose is only best seen by the one who took pledge. She frequently thought to herself whenever she felt her will wavering.
And I know the purpose very well…life in danger condoned is heavier than any mortal sin especially if you have the hands and brains to save it.
The people thought of Shinkai as awfully serious even when treating even a low fever. She would bustle back and forth in her small clinic which was an improvised receiving area complete with medicine bottles, rolls of clean cloths, water basins, and a single white-sheet bed. Then after a while as the patient has comfortably lied down, she would order the others to camp outside. Her mean welcome to non-patients sometimes pissed one or two but soon would realize her point and took the initiative to stay patient and be carefully obedient. The best of the dragging hours waiting for dusk was usually rewarded by a simple, relieved nod of the medicine woman. The worried family then could now rush inside to see the stable condition of the member.
As the villagers celebrate the recovery, the same morbid thoughts polluted her mind as she collected herself at the small peony garden behind her house.
They'll die eventually. All of them. All of them…no matter hard you try. No matter hard they try.
Shinkai would try not to close her eyes except for quick blinks. She was aware that drifting in the darkness would bring back her painful memories.
Death is inevitable. No reason to get attached to people.
Being distant like this was the only haven for her to keep her composure from slipping between her fingers. Nothing could come out from being overly caring to her patients as long as she provided them the complete treatment that her resources could offer her, and nothing more. These people are lucky, she thought dedicating a satirical smile to her own fleeting mind.
I am not the person to be nicknamed after the Taiho. Unlike him, Shinkai was a monster who crossed seas to employ a widespread killing of those who were never to last eternity - the old, the destitute, and the mortally sick. No one knew her true purpose for coming to Kei all the way from Shun, the kingdom of the southeast. Even the guild did not know that she had been inactive from her mission since the new Empress' coronation. Deep inside, however, a pang of nervousness slowly devoured her seclusion. Eyes were looking after her, watching her every move, waiting for the completion of her assignment. They were bound to capture her soon for good.
In her dire condition of living in the shadows she tried to live a normal life and even had a family who accepted her. The neighbors welcomed her when she was dropped off all alone at the age of seven unknowing that she was grasping around her tiny hand a treacherous weapon in a vial. With the females just lately banished, a sight of a new girl excited people. The elders took care of her education about Kei and the way of living there without prying her own background. That was why her mission turned to be so offensive and evil in her view. She could not lay a finger on those villagers whom even in their poor existence managed to raise another person to be aware of the other's existence.
Then, it came to her - an idea that could finally end the horrors of their group. With the knowledge passed on to her by the head of her foster family, Shinkai was able to develop a counterdrug to the poison she was told to use to carry out the genocide. It was really like heaven finally smiled upon her. Things however unfortunately unfurled into lamentable chronicles. That night, in the last year of Yo-Ou, was a death curse blazing in fire, screams, melted skins, and pale complexion with blood pus pockets. If only the provincial lord just listened to her, no one should have lost their lives. Shinkai would not have to hate the queen and the rest of the government that much. But now she had to bear the weight of the sin, the moans of the poor souls whom she left behind.
With more gaiety in the song repeatedly echoing in the distance, she cracked her old door a bit to gaze upon the villagers merrily dancing on the lush meadows. It was truly a peaceful midday and she had never seen the little village so lively. Her feet unconsciously dragged themselves that she was now standing beyond her doorstep facing the low bamboo gate embracing her shack. Sunlight showered on her pallid face and a smile fluttered on her lips.
A hurried shuffling from behind a nearby bush suddenly ripped Shinkai's reflective mood. An old woman with silver hair fixed in a widow's bun, emerged from a bush with a digging tool on her left hand and a grass basket on the other filled with glistening green tea leaves. She took a step backward towards to her door. Seeing this, the herb woman gave her a reassuring smile.
"I guess this lovely day has finally succeeded in luring you out of that prison. Welcome back to the world, Shin."
Shinkai hesitated and nervously looked down. The old woman, named Kaide, was the only one who called her such in a usual warm motherly tone. She established her favorite gathering sites around her home as if to check upon her well-being ever since her family died. Shinkai was very fond of her, too. However, whenever they see each other like this, the herb woman looked older and older that Shinkai sometimes refused to look at her. She did not want the people she loved to age and finally wither to a grave.
As if reading her thoughts, Kaide placed down her heavy basket and curled her gnarled fingers on the smooth bamboo pole gate.
"Really, time is always getting the best of us. We can't get any younger." She bent her back to emphasize her point and gave a quick look at Shinkai. The girl was staring blankly at the ground.
"That's why, I don't like Shin to waste every second following the shadows around, especially of those who already said their final farewells."
"I am not following shadows around. There is no point trying to make me join them."
"Why is that?"
Shinkai bit her lips as she gripped her door even tighter that the soft wood cracked and clippings fell on her feet.
"You were there…I left you…I left my family to die...that night…" Her hands shook as she spoke. The distant singing was fading swiftly with the wind. All was still and quiet as if bearing witness to her words. Kaide looked at the Shinkai's face with warm eyes and redirected them to the small flowers blooming on the bushes inside the gate.
"We all wanted you to be safe, together with the other women."
"But you are a woman, too! Why choose to waste your life?" Listening to the tone of her voice, Shinkai clasped her hands to her mouth. "I…I'm sorry…"
"Shin, I have lived my life, and I wanted to protect those who have not yet lived such a life like me."
"That is so foolish! Why can't people see that their life is not meant to be sacrificed for others! I try my best every time I cure someone so that they could continue experiencing the world. But there you were, choosing to die so that we may live. It is missing the whole point! I just don't get the virtue of sacrificing lives for a better cause! Isn't trying to live already the best cause?"
The old woman smiled sadly. She gazed at the remarkable spread of the Sea of Clouds above them. Farther up on Mt. Gyouten standing in its grand magnificence was the Kinpa Palace where the Empress resided. She strained her eyes as if to pierce the sprawling space and catch a glance of the glorious edifice and remarkable columns.
"You must be seeing things the way you want them, Shin, and I don't fully contradict it. However, sometimes seeing things the way they appear before you is a skill that you must possess."
Shinkai pursed her lips and threw a hard look on Kaide. "You…were not the one given this dreadful mission so you can speak of this…when I have to battle every fighting thought…"
"Mission?"
Realizing her mistake, Shinkai turned away from her and stared at the musty atmosphere of her house.
She said, "None of you could understand me." With that, she closed the door and wandered listlessly in the shadowy room. Only the darkness accompanied her now, just like the days when she was still in Shun. As the daughter of the Minister of Earth, she was kept aware of the situations in every corner of the kingdom. But the unraveling proved to be unfruitful for her as she began to deeply criticize the system to the point that she resented the King.
Shinkai could see however that his Highness was a compassionate and responsible ruler who never deprived his citizens all the help that he could offer. But what was spiteful was that the King focused more on the healthy, more capable part of the populace and almost threw the weak, the old and the handicap to the wolves. And for that, she could not forgive him.
Sacrifice is a lousy alibi.
When she turned seven, she ran away from home to the point of getting killed by the members of a guild whom she had ran through unknowingly as she left the gates of the central city. Since then, both her mind and soul were tied with darkness. Not only that she had betrayed those whom she cared so much, but also she had betrayed herself. The guild was founded to eradicate the so-called weak, whom Shinkai deep within her heart wanted to protect.
Kaide watched the door slam before her face. Telling these things to Shinkai was really a difficult task, but she did not want to give up. The elders in that little village believe in the girl's powerful mind to think about issues critically. What made it difficult for them to feed her the information was that she was a definite skeptic. Her dogmas were quite easy to rebut, but her arguments really have a certain pang of bitter reality, too, that even the elders had to reconsider. As far as she knew, Shinkai before coming to the village experienced a very likely traumatic undertaking. Kaide wanted to take care of her, especially her good mind which in the near future might of service to those around her and to herself.
The town lights at the approaching dusk were a sight to behold. Ten years paved way for more households to be established in the provinces that when gazed from above looked like pinpoints of faint glowing stars shining on a black drape of night. Most of the families have enough money to pay for extra oil for their lamps and more candles. Not even a stray dog would get lost with the roads properly lighted. This was one of the signs that Kei was really developing into a better kingdom, blossoming with life. But soundlessly a great shadow was lurking - patiently waiting to overcome life itself.