Disclaimer: I don't a single thing in this fic. Although I wish I did.
Quietly, the dryad in charge of the records added another curling parchment on the stack between the four Pevensies. The Witch had made it her mission to destroy as much semblance of Queen Swanwhite's dynasty when she had taken control a hundred and one years ago. But the long winter had passed with the return of Aslan and the crowning of the four siblings from the mysterious land of Spare Oom. In the year following their coronation, it was discovered that several of the laws written in King Frank's own words were discovered and slowly, the archives began grow in quantity.
Currently, the dryad's royal pupils had been at the task of reading and digesting the contents of the yellowing parchments for a majority of the day. And while the monarch-children were getting well along in their studies of the old laws, it was obvious a break was nigh for their comprehension of the flowery old Narnian script was beginning to become inconsistent.
The dryad's youngest queen gave her a look evoking sympathy, complete with glistening doe eyes and threatened pout. Resistance to a look like that was indeed futile. "Your majesties deserve a break from your studies." She relented with a warm glance over the two kings and queens. "Finish this scroll while I arrange lunch."
Queen Susan gave a pleased smile at their teacher as she took the top scroll from the top of the pile and handed it to the High King who began to decode the old law. The dryad kept to the edges of the room and began to step out as Mr. Tumnus came through the threshold.
"Faun Tumnus," the archivist greeted with a graceful curtsey.
"I came to see what progress has been made, Antonella." He admitted as Queen Susan became impatient at how long King Peter was taking.
"Come on, Peter!" she chided as Edmund looked over another scroll absentmindedly and Lucy scrawled flowers on the parchment provided for note taking. "Tell us what it says."
A wolfish grin spread across Peter's face as he cast Edmund an impish glance. At length he read, "The party of the first part shall be known in this contract as the party of the first part."
Edmund snorted in a failed attempt to hide his laughter as Lucy let out an unrestrained giggle.
They had adored the American comedians, the Marx brothers, back in Finchley. In fact when their movie, A Night at the Opera, came into the London theatres, Dad had taken them to see the film. The four could not recall a time when they laughed so hard. And Peter's timing on quoting the movie was simply hysterical and a much needed mood lifter.
The Gentle frowned and snatched the law away from her brother. "Where does it say that?" she questioned, taking the joke for truth.
"Right here," the High King explained, pointing at a random point in the law, "Right under the Sanity clause."
Antonella turned to look the faun in the face and brushed one of her long willow vines away from her eyes. "I was about to see about a break and arrange lunch. Have you seen the goose handmaiden?"
From the table where the monarchs sat, Queen Susan gave King Peter a hard look and replied with a laugh quoting, "You can't fool me. There ain't no Sanity Clause." For some reason, the four burst out into hysterics.
Antonella gave the faun a quizzical look. At times, their majesties spoke of alien notions such at 'moo-v's' that Tumnus usually explained as part of the Spare Oom culture. With any luck, Antonella hoped the faun- who had become an authority on the kings' and queens' jargon- could shed some light on what was so funny. "What has gotten into their Majesties, Master Tumnus? I can hardly see the humor in such laws."
Mr. Tumnus shook his head, at a loss of an answer as Queen Lucy asked the High King, "Do you follow me?"
When he confirmed that he did, the monarchs intoned chuckling, "'Well stop following me or I'll have you arrested!'"
Shaking his head, the faun turned back to the dryad archivist and replied, "My dear, Antonella, no matter how long I'll be in their Majesties acquaintances, I'll never understand the humor and many customs of the land of Spare Oom. The best advice I can give you is to allow it to happen and not question it."
The dryad nodded, not fully understanding the meaning of the faun's words or the humor the kings and queens found in the law. A small honk alerted the two Narnians to the little goose handmaiden. "Mrs. Beaver sent me to see what their Highnesses would like for luncheon." The goose explained with a quiet quack. Antonella nodded, noting how she and Beaver's wife were on the same page and getting the four's attention, asked what they would like to eat.
"Do we have any more marmalade rolls and ham?" King Edmund wondered and got a nod from the handmaid. "Very well, we'll have four of those, please."
"And two hard boiled eggs." The High King interjected, collapsing into hysterical laughter along with his siblings.
King Edmund nodded and for a reason their subjects could not fathom, repeated, "And two hard boiled eggs."
Confused why hard boiled eggs were so funny, the hand maiden honked and through laughs, the pink faced Queen Lucy giggled, "Make that three hard boiled eggs."
The three confused subjects looked at each other, at a loss of what was so hysterically funny. At length it became obvious that they were done ordering luncheon and the three turned slightly eager to leave the royal family to their revelry. "As I said before, my dear Antonella," Tumnus began as they made their way out of the archives, "It is best for one's head that one do not question Spare Oom humor."
A/N: ok, I admit it; I just saw my first Marx brothers' film last night and I couldn't resist sticking in some famous comedy from the Pevensie's time period. If I were Mr. Tumnus and Antonella, I would be utterly confused as well. I hope you lot find this just as amusing as I did. Please review and tell me what you think.