Disclaimer: None of these characters or the original idea are mine. This was borne from love, not desire for fame and fortune.
Authors Notes: The end of Lost City was so surprisingly emotional that I was compelled to finish it off in my head. It's also in part inspired b too much litening to Hold On by Sarah Mclachlan. It's been sat on my broken laptop for almost 4 years now. I finally retrieved all the data and found this all over again. Thus like a phoenix from the shorted out circuits, this story arose.
Or, to put it more succinctly; better late than never.
Enjoy and feed back please.
Cold.
This, and the sound of her breathing, were the only sensations she had to guide her; to provide her with the much needed proof that she was still alive.
Darkness shrouded her in her sleeping bag beneath who knew how many aeons of ice.
She opened her eyes to the slightly greyish blackness and watched clouds of condensation from her breath puff briefly to bring life into the darkness.
Her skin prickled with the cold despite her layers of clothes and her thermal blankets.
Ice.
Built as if a palace of ice, the sheen and slick on the walls faintly glistened and she realised numbly that in the cold darkness she could imagine patterns in the ice.
Faces.
His face.
His eyes dead and yet so full of soul, captured unblinking as they gazed at her in his final moments of lucidity.
Did he see her still?
Was there anything left of the man he had once been?
She sighed, pushing the pointless speculation away and rolled over, curling into herself. In the still cold darkness another sensation became apparent. She could hear her heart.
She wondered if she were quiet enough she might press her ear to his icy tomb and hear his heart beating in unison.
With a frown she dismissed her sudden fanciful longings and cursed the forbidden emotions that embodied them. She had, she supposed, moved on from that path, with regret but with acknowledgement of its necessity.
Still she cared too much for him, she acknowledged miserably. She cared enough to be hanging around here long after she'd fulfilled any usefulness she might serve. She cared enough to be lying here in the cold darkness, churning thoughts of their last truly coherent conversation over in her head and unable to seek solace in sleep.
Unlike him, who slept soundlessly and so very still.
With another sigh she gave in to her desire to see him again and silently stole from her bed, not bothering to slip boots over her already thick socks, nor to shed the extra blanket from her frame. She padded quietly into the eerie dark and sought him out.
She approached cautiously half expecting him the blink and offer her that tight little crinkle-eyed smile that he often bestowed on her like a special prize. Instead he remained, as always, locked in an expression of sad longing and she was reminded painfully that it was her that he was looking at when he froze. She was his last image. The thought sparked a moment of warmth deep within her.
She stood deliberately slightly to the left of him, so that his gaze once again fell upon her. Standing, toes touching the clear barrier encasing him, she pushed her face as close to his as she could; her hand reaching out to touch the ice over his heart.
Holding her breath she pressed her ear to the spot just below her hand and waited, expecting to hear.
Silence.
Not quite silence.
A random distant thunder, barely audible within the structure, rolled around them. Ice groaning under the weight of its years. The others - mostly scientists and military personnel hastily drafted in that had joined them immediately after the battle - lay sleeping muttering and snoring. Why had she not noticed the sound of the ice before? Was it that she was so still and silent herself now?
She pulled her head away and stared into his face again; memorising his features in case she should ever forget them.
The cold crept up her legs as she stood there; slowly turning her veins to ice. Numbness clawed at her body but she couldn't or wouldn't move away just yet. For an absurd moment her memory flashed on a childhood tale; a Greek tragedy; the Laurel tree and how the fair maiden Daphne was turned into one to escape the fierce love of Apollo. She wondered if the very thing was happening to her in reverse. If her love for him would root her to the spot and in the morning the others would wake and find her stood toe to toe and just as frozen.
She almost wished it could happen so that she might not spend another moment nursing the ache within her as she yearned just to hear his voice even if only to utter an exasperated curse or to tell her to get to the point.
Suddenly she was gripped with an urge to break the unbearable silence with its mournful ice wails and to speak. Just the talk to him, hear his name on her lips and the words she had wanted to utter but that had been denied release. She opened her mouth to formulate a sentence but her throat stuck and all that came out was a harsh sigh. She closed her eyes and blinked back tears of frustration. Even like this when he could not possibly hear she could not express herself openly and honestly. She cursed the part of her that sequestered her feelings to tightly within her walls.
"You still here?"
Daniel.
She gasped, startled at the sudden noise and wondered how long she'd really been there. She looked up to see him standing slightly behind her.
She smirked "Still?"
He shrugged and looked slightly embarrassed. "Yeah I, er…I heard you get up. Saw you walk past. Then I kind of drifted back to sleep for a while and then…well here you still are."
"Here I am." She sighed.
Carry on like this and people will think…actually she didn't care what people thought. If they couldn't find a way to bring him back, preferably as he was before the Ancient knowledge overtook his brain, then it really didn't matter. The whole goddamn world could know what she thought and be damned. If she had to spend her life hanging out in front of an ice sculpture of a man who was, in every sense, a hero, trying to find a way to bring him back then so be it.
Now she was damn well writing his obituary in her head. He wasn't dead yet dammit. He wasn't dead at all if she could do anything about it.
"You should get some sleep." Daniel added with a concerned frown.
She shook her head. "Not tired."
"C'mon Sam."
She turned around to see his concerned compassionate expression and acquiesced. He held out a hand towards her and she took it, relishing the warmth of his fingers rubbing at her chilled skin.
"You know they're nearly finished initial explorations of this place now?" Daniel asked, conversationally.
"Mmm." She responded.
"So I think they're gonna recall us. General Hammond has used up more than his fair share of favours to allow us to even hang about this long. I mean it's not as if we're contributing much other than getting in the way now and…"
"We're expressing professional interest, Daniel." She interrupted.
"Oh is that what it is?" He cast a sly sideways glance as her, which she caught and looked away before her eyes betrayed her.
"We did save the planet." She added wryly, with a backward glance into the icy chamber and it's lonely frozen resident. "Well, he did."
Daniel answered her with a silent question.
"Oh come on you want to…to…" She groped for the right expression for her feelings, "…fix this as much as I do!"
"Yeah but I don't think freezing our nuts off down here is gonna help somehow."
Sam sighed and looked back at him; now barely visible in the darkness. "What we need are the Asgard."
"I wonder why they're not answering?" Daniel mused. "I hope that's not a bad sign."
"Well, if they're losing their war and can't help the colonel we're probably screwed anyway but I prefer not to go there just yet. Let's stay positive." She nodded, convincing herself as much as Daniel. "Either way I have an idea on how we can attract their attention."
"Of course you do."
Sam nodded. "Just got to convince Doctor Weir to let us try."
"Yeah." Daniel started walking again. "Well if you can't blind her with science and I can't simply talk her into submission I'm sure Teal'c can turn on the ol' charm."
Sam stopped and tilted her head at him in a puzzled smile.
"Uh, sorry. Think I'm over compensating for the lack of…uh…" He chucked a thumb back towards where Jack was frozen.
Sam smiled affectionately and nodded; the knowledge of her friend's one hundred percent focus on the same goals made her feel slightly more confident that she'd get to hear the Colonel making similar raspy voiced cracks himself in the very near future.
"But right now you need sleep Sam." He yawned for emphasis and Sam found herself yawning as well. "C'mon."
She smiled sleepily and followed him back out to their sleeping area. Tucking herself deep under the blankets she whispered a promise to herself, and to him. "I will bring you back to us, Jack, I promise."
~End~