(Hello everyone! This is my little spin-off of Zombieland. I hope you enjoy!

Throughout the story I hope you add this playlist to ITunes to listen to while reading my story:

Welcome to Paradise-Green Day

Desolation Row-My Chemical Romance

Teenagers-My Chemical Romance

I Wanna Be Where The Boys Are (Live)-The Runaways (mostly for the beat)

And basically anything AC/DC.

I might add more to the playlist if I find more songs.

Enjoy my story please!)

We've all heard of the four kids who fought off a shitload of zombies and shot Bill Murray correct? You know, Tallahassee, Columbus, Wichita, and Little Rock. Yeah, they were pretty cool. I try to follow in their footsteps in this zombie apocalypse. My name is Aidan. Last year in school people called me AIDS to convince everyone I had them. It's surprising that I'm not a virgin ain't it?

I have an Australian accent and I currently hide in a Car Wash in Spokane, Washington. I know that know one really thinks of a Car Wash as a good place to hide but it works for me. And I can show you why.

The gore and scab covered zombie heaved itself at the huge window that was protecting me from it's endless hunger. I smirked viciously and pushed a lever on the control box. A hose sprayed water violent at the undead creature ripping its loose limbs off and against the wall on the other side. Three more starving demons sprinted towards the window. I smoothly pulled another lever and the rest of the hoses squirted them. They all instantly snapped in half. Black gluey "zombie blood" splashed all over. I laughed hysterically at the carnage.

And this is just the beginning of the great-ness of staying in a carwash.

I whirled around and seized a Dr. Pepper and a bag of Doritos.

This is basically the room you can wait in while you get your car washed.

I ripped open the bag of chips and munched on a few of them.

When I left my home, I remembered to bring all of my Zombie movies. Resident Evil, 28 Days Later, Shaun of the Dead, and Zombie Strippers (mostly for the pleasure of it)… And my IPod of course. They geniuses who ran this car wash had everything. IPod dock and a television with a DVD player and a computer. I could live here forever. I still keep my phone, even though the only one who I text is my friend Alice who is supposedly hiding in her basement. I know that at some point I'll get my lazy ass out of this Car Wash and go find her. That way I'm not completely alone.

I gazed out the small window on the door. Some of the zombies were sinking their teeth into the past-dead body of a stereo-typical woman with blonde hair and big breasts. Her skimpy clothes were soaked with crimson and her organs were spread across the street. I felt pity for her. She was the prostitute that always stood there on the corner of that road. I remember exactly what happened to her. She was picked up by a man who was recently bitten. In fact, he was actually one of the first infected. They went back to his place and when she woke up in the morning, all of her fingers were missing and... Let's just say, the zombie man also took the idea of "eating a girl out" a bit literal. The next thing she knew, she was being hunted down by the undead bloke. In her exaggerated high heels, she tripped and was swarmed by thousands of the bastards. Wanna know how I know all this? My friend was the dumbass who picked her up. Dan called me while it was going down so he could rub it in my face. I told him, "Paying a prostitute to fuck you isn't something to be proud of, mate."

I never realized that it was actually a brilliant idea. Going down with a bang! The last words he uttered- or sounds- were of complete pleasure. I must actually praise the slut and jock that die at the beginning of horror movies. At least they die while having sex. So I think I'll add something to Columbus's little list of rules.

Rule 33: Always better to go down with a bang!