I wake up, expecting to be in my bedroom, but instead I wake up in another familiar bedroom. Confused, I look around and notice that the other side of the bed is empty. It takes me a second to remember why I'm here. Why I'm in my old bedroom sleeping in my old bed. In Matt's bed. I'm in Matt's apartment, which also used to be mine.
After a second of confusion, it all comes back to me. The events at Chicago Med. Severide almost dying. The Ebola scare. The insane fear I felt, along with all the stress. Then, I remember Molly's. How Matt and I were giving each other looks all night. At first it was just friendly smiles at each other, but while Boden was giving his speech, I was something else in his eyes. Lust.
I tried to ignore it and my feelings for him. It was obvious that I still loved him. We broke up months ago, yet I'm still madly in love with him. I don't think I'll ever be over him. But, before last night's events, I was confused with him. Not too long ago, it was apparent that he was over me, or at least it seemed that way. Hell, he slept with some girl not too long after our break up. I was nowhere near over him, and I thought he moved on and didn't care about me.
That's why I was so confused when he walked over to me when I was drinking at the bar with Brett. He whispered in my ear, "You want to get out of here?" and I didn't know what to say. It took me a minute to register in my head what he meant by that. He wanted to leave with me and have sex. I knew that look in his eyes.
I almost choked on my drink, then looked over at Brett. She looked amused and chuckled softly before mouthing, "Go." So, I put my drink down and nodded my head. "Yeah, let's go." I grab my coat and walk out of Molly's with him. I wasn't going to refuse sex with Matt.
I was confused still, I didn't know what he wanted. Was it just sex? Was he interested in getting back together with me? I had no idea, and I was too scared to ask him. I didn't know what he wanted and worse, I didn't know what I wanted.
The ride back to Matt's place was silent, neither of us knowing what to say. When we arrived at his place, he pins me against the wall and kisses me aggressively. After making out with him for several minutes, he says while gaining his breathe, "Bedroom?" I nod, and follow him to his bedroom.
I loved Matt, but I was too scared to admit my feelings for him and I was too scared of being let down. I didn't want to ruin this moment, so I decided to play it safe and suggest that we keep it just sex. So, as I pin him to the bed, I say with uncertainness in my voice, "This, this is just a reaction to the stress of the day?" He nods slightly and responds, "Absolutely." Then, he turns us over and pins me to the bed and attaches his lips back to mine.
Last night feels like a dream. I can't believe I slept with Matt. I keep reminding myself that it's just sex, nothing more, but my feelings for him are so strong. It felt like it was much more than sex.
I stretch my arms and get out from under the covers. I find my panties on the floor and put them on. I can't find my shirt right now, so I decide to go through Matt's closet and pick out one of Matt's CFD shirts. It's huge on me, but I don't care. I used to love wearing Matt's shirts and I can't help myself right now.
Then, I walk out of the bedroom and search for Matt. It doesn't take me long to find him. He's cooking something on the stove. I smile at him for a second. I think about all our old memories and the many times I woke up to find him cooking breakfast. I miss that and I miss us as a couple so much.
"Hey," I say as I enter the kitchen. He turns around to face me and I see a smile on his face. "Hey Gabby, morning," he answers. I walk over to him and answer, "Sorry that I'm um, wearing your shirt. I couldn't find mine." He chuckles slightly and responds, "It's okay. It looks better on you anyways."
It's quiet for a moment, none of us knowing what to say. It feels awkward. I think for a second and decide that I don't want to do this. I don't want to sit here and act like nothing happened, so I get up and say, "I should probably get out of here. I'm sure Brett's worried about me." I get up and I'm about to go to the bedroom to put on some pants when Matt calls my name.
I turn around and say, "What?" He walks over to me and stares at me. He is about to speak, but hesitates for a second. "I, I had a great night," he says and I nod. "Yeah," I say. I'm about to go head out again, but his hand finds my shoulder. He takes a deep breath and says, "Gabby, I know you said it was a reaction to the stress of the day, but it felt like more to me. Look, I understand if you still hate me for being a dick, but I just wanted to say that I'm sorry. I miss you and I miss us. Because here's the thing, I still love you Gabby."
He studies me after he finishes and I'm speechless. He just said that he wants to be with me. He still loves me. I still love him and I want to be with him. Is this actually happening? I can't help but grin and respond, "I love you too, Matt."
This causes him to have a huge smile on his face, then his hands grab my face and he kisses me aggressively. Passionately. And I kiss him back. When we both need air, we pull apart and he caresses my face. "I want you back. I know we have a lot of shit to work out, but I know we will. You're the love of my life Gabby and I can't live without you."
I can't help but have a few tears in my eyes. I never thought I'd have this chance with Matt again. I feel so happy and thrilled, and I choke out, "I want to be yours again too. I know we'll be okay, Matt." Matt then embraces me in a tight hug and I rest my head on his shoulder. "It's good to have you back in my arms," he says and I can't help but chuckle.
We stay in each other's arms for several minutes then we pull apart. "I'm sorry for being a bad candidate at first. I should've respected you and I'm sorry," I say to him. "Gabby, I should've been more understanding. I was so mean to you and I'm so sorry. I want you to know that I don't blame you for our break up, okay? I should've been a better fiancé."
The truth is, we both had a lot to talk about, but right now I just wanted to enjoy this morning with Matt. "We both screwed up. But, we're okay now." I say. He nods his head and then he says, "So, since we're back together, I was kind of hoping that you could put that ring back on." I don't hesitate, I quickly respond, "yes, of course!" Then he asks me, "and since you're my fiancé again, do you want to move back in with me?"
I lean in and kiss him, then whisper, "of course I do. I love you so much Matthew Casey." He kisses my forehead then responds, "I love you too, Gabriela Dawson." I then say, "We have a lot to work out, but I believe that we can make our relationship work this time."
Matt nods his head, and responds, "Me too, Gabby." Then, he asks me, "So, do you want to eat breakfast with me, fiancé?" I chuckle, loving that he called me fiancé. I missed hearing him call me that. "Sure, babe."
I sit down in a chair at the kitchen table and wait for him to finish cooking. Several minutes later, he turns off the stove and puts food on the plate. I look over and see that he cooked omelets, which is one of my favorite breakfast foods. He remembered that I loved omelets. Usually, I'm the one to cook them, but this time he did. He's a decent cook, but I usually was the one to cook because I'm good at it. The times he usually cooked was when he woke up before me and would make me breakfast, like today.
He walks over to me and puts the plate down in front of me and kisses my forehead. "Your favorite," he says gently, then sits next to me at the table. "Thank you for the breakfast," I tell him as I start to take a bite of the food. He stares at me amused as I swallow the first bite. "What?" I giggle a he continues to study my face.
"Do they actually taste okay?" he asks me and I nod. The omelet is actually very good and I'm impressed with Matt's cooking. "It's actually really good," I say honestly and he laughs. "Don't lie to me, Gabs!" I laugh as well and respond, "No, honestly, they're really good. Wow, babe, I'm impressed." Matt smiles at me in response and we both continue to eat our food.
We both eat in silence for a minute, and finally I break the silence after thinking about Kelly. I realize that he didn't come home last night and I'm thankful. Matt and I both would've had to do a lot of explaining if he was home last night. "Thank god Kelly didn't come home last night," I say to Matt.
"I know. We had the place to ourselves last night. We didn't have to be quiet," Matt jokes and I blush slightly. "Where is he?" I ask, curious as to why Kelly didn't stay here last night. He thinks for a moment, then remembers, "He stayed at April's." Confused as to who April was, I ask, "April?"
"She's Kelly's childhood friend. She came back to Chicago and they reunited. I guess that they're more than friends now. He texted me saying he was at her house last night," Matt explains to me as we both finish our breakfast. I nod my head, and ask him worried, "You don't think he will mind me moving back in, right?"
Matt looks up at me and responds, "I don't think he will care and besides, it's my place. I don't give a damn what he thinks." I smile and get up with my plate and put it in the sink. Matt does the same and then walks back over to me.
"Do you have construction today?" I ask him, thinking about my plans for today. We don't have a shift today and Matt usually does construction on his days off from shift. I, on the other hand, don't really have a side job like that. My side job is working at and co-owning Molly's.
"I do, but I'm going to cancel. I just want to spend a day with my girl," he tells me, then leans in and kisses me. "I like the sound of that," I admit, loving the fact that he wanted to take his job off today so he could be with me.
"Besides, we have a lot of making up to do," he smirks at me, finding the bottom of my shirt and lifting it up slightly. I grin at him and he says, "You look so damn sexy in my clothes." Then, as I blush, his lips attach to mine aggressively.
A lot has happened between us over the past months, but I know that we're going to be okay. We will work out the problems, I'm certain. I know that this time we will make it to the alter and we will get married. And for our jobs and the marriage rules, I don't care what happens. As long as I have Matt, I'm okay because he is my future.
Between kisses, I mutter, "I love you." He grins and kisses me once more, then whispers, "I love you too, Gabby. I always will. You're my forever."
