A few notes:

This is going to be an AU, in which Namine won't be participating in the original plot. Which means Kairi still remains the Nobody-But-Not-Quite-Because-She-Doesn't-Have-Darkness-In-Her-Heart and Sora's lost memory is repaired by time – he just slept and waited until everything was cleared up. Someday I may sit down and write all the plotholes that I have to fill, but not some of these days.

And one warning: This. Will. Take. A. While. xD In any meaning conceivable: it'll take time in between updates (probably), it'll take chapters to start the romance and it'll take time in the universe, HECK, it'll take time for Nami to show up~ I hope you're patient xD

Discl.: I don't own it. Haha.

Of impossibility and dreams

...

.

"Hey, Sora."

"Mmm?"

"Don't you think something's changed in Riku?"

"What?"

"He seems… bored to death."

The door made a soft 'clink' as the key was turned in the lock. Each wooden board creaked with sounds, unique to old houses and the sun was drawing out the form of the windows on the floor. It was a degree or so cooler here than outside and Riku was really happy about that simple fact. Sure, diving was refreshing, especially if you went deeper in the colder depths of the sea, away from the heat, but the long walk home had taken away the pleasant feeling and now sweat was covering him whole.

His toes and feet made an unidentified noise as he slid his sandals off and proceeded on to his usual procedures before a shower. His clothes made a soft 'swish' as he took them off. The water made soothing 'tap, tap, tap'-s as he let the coldest of all and let his body.

Summer was kind of unbearable these days.

It too hot to do anything besides search for something that might cool him.

But Riku couldn't stay inside and do nothing. He felt as if in prison on these islands, the house was worse.

Diving was a sport that gave a little freedom, as opposed to everything else. The ocean depths weren't that boring as Selphie always put them and provided him with more amusement than everything that land would ever hold.

But he wasn't a merman – he couldn't live underwater and he was definitely not going back to Atlantica. The mental scars still resided.

It wasn't a plus that there wasn't anyone who did want to do anything more interesting than usual. Kairi was gone, having to go on additional courses for school. She hadn't been able to pass her classes like him and Sora. So, key-blade boy, being the love-struck idiot he was, refused to go out and was apparently intent on sitting around moping in his house – how he survived in that oven, called his home without any ice-cream or ice or cold drinks was beyond Riku. And it wasn't just Sora – everyone, absolutely everyone had hidden away from the weather and didn't want to even show their noses outside, even to get frickin' ice-creams. It was a stretch to think that someone would even think about going outside to do something.

If Riku was someone else, then probably he would be doing the same. But his mind, his body, heck even his soul, if he were to believe that crap, wanted to do something, to go out, to just run at least. Just… to be free. Not restrained by everything and everyone and school.

Coming calmly from his reverie, the teen decided that it was strange to stand in the middle of his room and, still very calm and collected, he plopped himself on his bed, intent on analyzing himself. It wasn't very normal for him to be calm, with that boiling energy of his. He was sure he brought new meaning to the phrase 'wild youths'. Or something like that.

Or maybe he just wanted to have human company, not some inanimate objects, somehow turned animate by the heat. When was the last time he saw someone the same race, apart from his family? A week ago? A week and a half? He didn't even remember.

Every human being was used to human contact, he guessed. It was normal for him, competitive and such, to want to have people around him, to prove he's better and such. Even though…

Even though the reason he became like that had long evaporated, he still acted that way. Even before the whole ruckus for the last - were they two? – years, Kairi was floating slowly and surely out of his reach and more toward Sora. He liked to think he had matured out of his crush and now knew he was past these things and happy that his best friends were like that. Even with the fact that Sora got all mopey without her.

What would it be if he was in love again? It would be fun, he mused, to spoil her ruthlessly, to talk endlessly and stuff, as he gazed at the ceiling. Surely, it wouldn't be as boring as now, that he had enough evidence to back up as a sure statement.

What would it feel to be like a prince? Like in those fairytales-

And it was the time when he decided that it was too much. Girls, girls, who needed them, unless as friends? He wasn't really successful in that category. He always lost his chances, not only with Kairi, but with everyone.

Deciding yet again to stop randomly contemplating stuff and remembering bits and pieces from the past, Riku moved yet again on his bed and then chose to stop rolling in the sheets and being all depressed and so on.

He stood up to go get himself an ice-cream. And managed to keep himself from the bed for five whole minutes. Which was an accomplishment today, apparently.

Not caring how dirty his sheets would later, he dropped on his sheets and restarted eating it. And probably examining his mental condition. It was fun.

Good, he'd made himself sound like a crazed person. Though that might be true as well. One that went through his adventures would surely come out at least a little emotionally broken. He just hoped the damage wasn't that big.

Riku, shifted uncomfortably, the sugary taste still prominent in his mouth. Was he that bad, to go that further? To think that he was mentally weak? But it was sort of true – he was refused to hold upon the Keyblade after all, and then his descend into darkness and then Ansem and all those things on and on. Everything was a small wound…

No, no, no, no and no. Riku, the hero of darkness didn't think like that, he argued with himself, while yet again switching a position. Riku, the hero of darkness, held his experiences in high regard, used them as a lesson, knew that they had created what he was, that they shaped him to be this. Riku, hero of darkness, was a knight whose powers were feared by many for their destructive power over everyone – including the user. Riku, hero of darkness was a wise person, confident in his abilities and power.

Riku wasn't a hero of darkness, and the one that had once called him like that, was long dead.

He was just a small, scared boy.

And then he shifted again in his bed and realized that there had to be something off if he couldn't find a relaxing position while it took him a second or so make himself comfortable. Moving again, he realized that there was probably a small round object underneath his mattress.

With the fairytale 'The Princess and the Pea' in mind, he slipped off the bed and, moving his mattress up, he looked for the obnoxious 'pea'. He understood now that it was easy to feel a pea from under his mattress. Poor princess, he thought randomly, eyes still finding nothing, even a peasant woman could have been able to feel the pea. There was nothing special about her.

It was sort of sad too.

It took him some time until he found the offending object and it wasn't a pea. It was a pearl, something more royal and stupider than pea. And why was he still thinking about the 'pea' was beyond him.

Content that the annoyance was now gone, he jumped up on the bed again and looked at the pearl and tried to make an enourmous description of it. But couldn't succeed.

What was it to say? It was white, with a few yellow lines, etched in the mass and nothing more.

Riku suddenly remembered that he had gone diving before. Probably it was then that he'd caught it and then forgotten about it and then it had slipped and then somehow went under his mattress. Yeah, right. What had he been smoking?

Regardless of thoughts, he continued gazing at the sea jewel, as if it was something worth wasting his time.

… Wait, was he wasting time?

… Damn.

Grasping the pearl in his right hand, he went on tidying himself up in order to go out and dive – that was better than lying in boredom anyway. After some thought, he put the sparkly little 'pea' on his nightstand. He was going to take it to a jeweler's store tomorrow.

Probably.

From then on, everything was a daze.

He didn't notice how he went through his activities, the diving, going home, talking with his family and everything else. He didn't notice when he crashed on his bed, without even undressing, the promise to himself forgotten.

He was dreaming obviously. There was that strange haze, unique for dreams, covering his eyes. And the colours were too vivid underneath the fog, the vibrant scarlet of the roses contrasting with the white air.

Well, dreams did tend to have strange colourings.

Even Riku, as bad at coming up with excuses as he was, could say that was a lame excuse even by his standards. While dreams did tend to be darker or brighter than the real world (whichever from the vast number of real worlds it was), there was no way that the air was white and he could see the red roses. No, red couldn't describe them perfectly – scarlet was the only colour powerful enough to be used. Even though there were repeats in his mental speech.

With a small start, Riku realized that the only thing he could see through the white sheen of air was the scarlet of the roses. Even the leaves and the branches of the closest plants were invisible. That had happened in the last minute, apparently.

And he couldn't do anything, not calling upon his darkness, lest something should worsen. Seeing white was better than seeing dark for his sanity overall, despite what his instincts told him.

Ever the curious boy he was, Riku tried to move to explore the place his dream was taking place but tripped over his own steps even before taking a step away from his place. His eyes searched for any difference in the monotonous white, but he couldn't find anything. The white was white, some sort of dirty white, not enough to give off a headache, mixed up with enough yellow-pink-whatever to create a creamy colour, but not close enough to be treated like a deep champagne…

… Oh, dear light and darkness, did he just use 'champagne' as a type of colour? Did he just specify it to being deep champagne? Or, rather not, because as he thought above, the air wasn't exactly champagne, but- Sweet power of darkness, did he just do it again? The place was doing strange stuff on his brain.

Deciding yet again to try and explore his dream as seen that here nothing was going to happen and the action wasn't going to take place here, Riku turned to gaze at the fog thoughtfully. Apparently his subconscious was waiting for him to act until the real part of the nightmare could come. Nah, probably it wasn't a nightmare - how many nightmares had taken place in a rose garden?

…Now that he thought about it, rose gardens did make some dramatic setting.

All the better, he guessed. Nightmares were fun – especially if he was fighting something. That could account as a dream for him.

Suddenly his searching eyes fell upon a splotch of whiter white somewhere in a random direction. It was the bad white – the one that made black spots in his eyes and made his head swim. There was something in there. Probably another rose. Nothing special.

But the headache that was forming was pretty strong. All right, not just 'pretty' strong, very strong.

He turned the other way.

There was a single blue rose, far away in the distance, that he could see clearer than every other, despite the distance.

He came from the embrace of sleep slowly, as not per usual, not exactly wanting to wake up. For a few moments he lied there, eyes closed, the blue rose and the garden imprinted underneath his lids. He hadn't wanted to wake up, why had he?

Easy – because, he had wished to stay.

The distance between him and the impossibly-blue rose had been so big… and he couldn't do anything to get it smaller. As searching for fun and challenge as he was, he wanted to go back to sleep and to the garden and find the way to go there and-

And what was he going to do when he reached it? Dance happily? Pick it up? No, it was too nice-looking to be sentenced to decay.

It wasn't that much about its appearance, the fact that it was 'pretty', he guessed. But it would prove that he's accomplished a thing, something that he'd been denied at first.

He turned the other way and squeezed his eyes. The last thing he saw was the pearl on his nightstand.

That day, he didn't rise from his bed.

Nor did he do it the next day. And the next.

"Riku hasn't come out from his home for a week now."

"What do we do?"

"…"

As, some wise people say (you know who you are :P) metaphors are fun~~~

So-ooo, what do ya say? Good, bad, horrendous? Dialogue-less, plot-less? I'd love to hear from ya, so do send a review, 'kayy?