A/N - for those who know that Jesse's heartache is inevitable.
He didn't quite know what to do or think when he saw Rachel and Finn having a very heated make out session on stage, during their performance. All he knew that it was like a kick in the stomach and the feeling of being triple-casted was back, that dreadful feeling of knowing.
He would never be good enough for her.
'Was that scripted?' He quickly asked as a last resort, a quiet 'No' only confirmed his fears. Rachel was using him to be the star performer, again.
It wasn't a surprise that they lost. In fact, he was quite pleased, they didn't deserve to win.
He didn't quite know what to do with himself anymore. He couldn't stay at Lima, and watch Rachel choose Finn over and over again, with her not knowing that Finn is not what she deserves. He hasn't got a place in college anymore, and he definitely can't ask his parents for help, not that they would even give it too him in any form other than a blank check.
He walked off the stage as soon as the results were read, and he could feel Rachel behind him, he hated that he knew it was her.
'Jesse!' she called, trying to get him to stop, he spun around, heart beating erratically.
'I don't think i want to hear what you're going to say Rachel, I really don't think I can take it.' He murmured, avoiding her face.
'Jesse' she whispered, 'I'm so sorry...it's just, Finn and I..' she trailed off, playing with her dress. Jesse suddenly felt angry.
'Then why did you let me take you to prom? Why did you let me hug you? Why did you let me say all those things? Why did you let me kiss you?' he shouted, walking up to her closer, 'Look Rachel I know what I did to you was possibly the worst thing someone could have ever done to someone, but I thought...I thought you had forgiven me' He stared at her long and hard. They were as close as they was a year ago, when he egged her forehead, but now it was her turn to break his heart once and for all.
She didn't say anything for a long time, she just looked down.
'You left me first, remember?' She finally whispered, a stray tear rolling down her face.
'And a week later, you and Finn were singing 'Faithfully' to each other and exchanging 'I love you's' were you not?' He accused her, squaring his shoulders, he began to walk away again.
'I'm sorry' She apologized, stopping him dead in his tracks. He let out a shaky breath, trying to pull himself back together, he turned around to face her, just one last time.
'You'll always have Finn to go back to Rachel, he'll always be there to love you...I don't have anyone. Am I really that difficult to love? I thought I was doing everything right this time round...' He finished, turning around, rubbing his wet eyes, he prepared to walk out of her life forever. 'Finn may give you love and happiness, but not as much as I could have, not even close, I really did love you Rachel'
The cold, New York air hit his face, he stuffed his hands in his pockets and started to walk down the busy streets so maybe he wouldn't feel so alone.
Why does everyone leave me? He thought, closing his eyes tightly.
The show was finally over, there was no one left to perform too.