Revanche
"Did you know that the average shot glass in the Federation is one point five fluid ounces?" Cody asked. He was always full of trivial information, but when one really needed to know something, he would find himself suddenly lacking. "On the other hand, anything larger than one point two five fluid ounces in the Klingon Empire is not considered a shot. They figure that if it's really potent enough, it should fit in that lower amount, or it's not even worth taking."
"Fascinating," I replied, though I didn't really find it so.
Cody continued, "You know, most people think everything about the Klingons is 'bigger.' Kind of like an ancient Texas. But there are a great many things that they enjoy in smaller amounts than Humans or especially Ferengi."
I threw one more shot down before stacking it on the top of our impressive pyramid atop the too-small table in front of us. The waiter kept coming by and offering to take the glasses away, but we would shoo her (him? It?) away. Most of the shots had been absorbed by Cody, but I had enough to make it respectable.
The pub we were in wasn't particularly nice in any way, but it was the kind that was always busy, which was the perfect place for our business. Most of the clientele were Arin'Sen, so we stuck out a little as the only beings without ridges on our foreheads. They were a paranoid bunch, having been on the border between the Federation and the Klingon Empire for centuries, now. Klingons once took over their planet and stripped it of its resources, and the Arin'Sen had to flee. The Federation moved the remaining refugees to a new planet. However, that planet proved too hostile for them to survive. Thus, the Arin'Sen have scattered out. A race without a homeworld.
A long bar table stretched out from the doorway, crowding people coming in or out, so as to try to keep people from running off without paying their tabs. Right now, there was only one lady sitting in a corner by that door. She had a bottle in front of her, but she hadn't touched it. From there, she could see the whole room. She kept her black hood low, but just a bit of blue skin from her chin showed, and small bumps at the top of the hood didn't do a good job of hiding her antennae.
Cody had been going on for several more minutes about Ferengi size measurements, but I hadn't been paying attention. Cody was a good man. Born on Mars, his ancestors had been a part of the first colonists who helped terraform the planet. Dark skinned, dark haired, he had just a bit of what Earthers called a "British Accent." When he paused, I nodded and said "uh huh."
"You weren't listening to a word I said, now, were you?" he asked.
"Uh huh." I responded.
"C'mon, good man, how –"
Cody started to get annoyed, but I was saved by the bell. My transceiver in my ear crackled and a soft voice whispered "Target is coming in."
I nodded to the doorway where two Nausicaans push through. Like many in their race, they were big and strong. Ugly, by human standards, their mouths opened and closed in different directions and they had ridges. I would have to ask Cody sometime if they were related to Klingons in some way.
"What in the A'gauth is that smell?" yelled the biggest the two. His name was Naurishe and we'd had dealings before. They always started the same way – "Oh, look. Humans. Keep, you may want to disinfect that table when they leave."
He pushed his way through the crowd of Arin'Sen and made his way to the table. Cody made his way to my right, seemingly to give the Nausicaans room, but really it was so he could keep his phaser ready and his back away from the duo.
"Naurishe," I said, nodding my head as a way of greeting. I held up my shot glass and offered it them, "Can I get you boys a drink?"
I couldn't remember the other Nausicaan's name. I would have guessed, but it might not have been the first time I had seen him, and Nausicaans are easily insulted when one gets their name incorrectly. He swatted in the air and spit on the floor. "Human piss," he mumbled.
"Why do you insist on making a big entrance when you're supposed to be handling secret information?" Cody asked. "Wouldn't it be better if you just snuck in?"
"We always make a big entrance," Naurishe answered as he turned the seat backwards and sat with his legs wide apart. "If we didn't, then they would know something is up."
"You got it, then?" I asked.
"I want to see the 10,000," Naurishe shot back. "That's a lot of platinum. I don't see a bag."
"You think we're stupid enough to bring 5,000 in a pub?" Cody answerd. "Money's in a safe spot, which we'll tell you after you give us the money."
"I don't trust you," Naurishe replied.
"Our boss has always come through," I answered. "And the price that was agreed on was 5,000, not 10,000."
"Yeah, well, we had some issues getting it here," the other Nausicaan answered. "KDF is doing extra checks. Has more checkpoints set up."
"You should have considered that when you were negotiating the price," I answered. "If it's a trust issue, we can take you to the money, but we want to verify the information, first."
"Boys…" a soft voice came through the communicator in my ear. "We may have extra company."
"KDF is on its way, right now," Cody said. He crossed his arm and showed that annoying smirk he has when he knows he's right about something.
Just as he finished, four large Klingons came in wearing full regalia and carrying a variety of weapons. They didn't call out or announce themselves, but the pub went silent, anyway. Nearly all eyes turned to the warriors.
"All right, 5,000," Naurishe whispered. "But you have to take it right now."
"3,000," I answered. "That thing is hotter than either of us thought."
"We negotiated," he hissed.
The Klingons spread out across the bar. They hadn't spotted us, yet, but as soon as they saw two Nausicaans and two humans, they would make their way right over to us.
"Three is our last offer," I said. I put on my best poker face. Truth was, I was scared. Cody is a pretty good shot, but I don't think we could take on all 4 by ourselves. We needed the information and if I went back to the boss empty handed, he'd be pretty upset.
"Three," the other Nauscaan answered, sliding a yellow square across the table. It was transparent and light. A data disk like they used to use on Starships over 200 years ago before subspace communications were perfected. I picked up the disk, handed it to Cody and slid a small data pad with a map on it.
"You better get out of here," I said, nodding towards the back of the room where the exit doors were. Without a word, the two go up and quickly shuffled through the crowd and out the back.
"What is that smell?" one of the Klingons yelled out as he spotted us from a few tables away. "Hoo-man piss?"
"That joke just never gets old," Cody sighed. "I very much doubt with noses like that, they can smell us, anyway."
The four moved together until they came up at our table. The largest stood just ahead of the others, with his arms crossed over the many decorations on his uniform.
"Gentlemen, how about some rum for the glory of the Empire?" I asked, holding up the last shot.
The leader bent over the table and then slapped away the glass. The whole room was silent, as everyone watched the shakedown. They may all laugh at how humans smell, but up close, that strong musky Klingon scent can even overcome a bar full of alien smells.
"What are Feddie scum like you doing this far past the Neutral Zone?" the leader asked.
"Whoa, now, hold on – " Cody started.
"Yeah, we're not Federation," I finished. "Not even close. We're just average joes making a delivery."
"I thought all hoo-mans were in your pathetic military," the leader hissed. "You don't even have enough honor to join up and fight?"
"Kraug, how do we know they're not spies," another of the Klingons asked.
"Will," my ear piece crackled. "I have a clear shot at the two on your right."
"Look, Kraug" I said in my best calming voice, "The war has been over for at least five years, now, right? Can't we just let bygones be bygones and have a drink together."
"A good strong Klingon Blood Wine to celebrate the days when we all hated each other?" Cody asked.
"Which, of course, is not today?" I tried.
The Klingons all looked at us as if we our universal translator was broken.
"All you do is talk," the Klingon huffed. "Do you never— "
I didn't let him finish the sentence. This was going nowhere. We were going to fight sometime, so I wanted it to be on my terms. I kicked the table in front of me as hard as I could into the air, sending our nice little pyramid of shot glasses into the air, and into the faces of the Klingons. It wouldn't hurt them much, but it would get in the way of their vision as Cody and I pushed into them and sent them falling over backwards.
A flash of bright blue light filled the bar for a moment as our lovely First Mate fired from her corner by the doorway, stunning the two Klingons on our right and taking them out of the fight.
Cody and I jumped over the bar and dashed out just behind our blue-skinned compadre. Screams filled the air and the hallway was jammed as the crowd didn't want to be around for the inevitable KDF clean-up that would come. No one attacks Klingon forces and gets away with it—at least not out here.
Cody and I stuck close, we didn't want to get separated, but I lost our Angel in the crowd. For a blue skinned, white haired beauty, she can blend in really well when she wants.
Cody kept yelling something to me, but I couldn't make it out above the crowd's shouts. He grabbed my arm and pulled me down a very tight alleyway between two large buildings. That was when I heard Zara, our Andorian, yelling in my earpiece.
"There are at least six following. They're beating anyone they find and asking for the humans. Do you want me to move to intercept and cover you?"
"No!" I yelled. I didn't really have time to think the situation over. It may have been better to have her climb up and watch over us, calling out locations, but we weren't here for a fight, we were here to avoid a fight as much as possible. "Get to the Bug! Get her prepped and ready. Cody and I are apparently taking the scenic route."
"Don't stop for icicles," Zara answered. I never understood her sense of humor.
Cody and I slid down the alley and came out on a much quieter street. This could be good or bad. Good because that mean the Klingons weren't here, but bad because there was no crowd to blend in with. We hurried across the street and headed "south" towards the docking bays.
This wasn't a planet. We were in the middle of a giant asteroid with enormous transparent aluminum domes surrounding the city. The city was run down and full of dilapidated buildings. The perfect place to have secret meetings, but also the type of place that police forces often check for criminals. Gravity nets kept us all at around 1G, but KDF had been known to turn those nets off and let everyone float around while they find their prey.
Cody and I were out of breath as we found the end of the street. There was no star out here to heat the system, so it was always night-time. When the street lights were down, it was especially dark. We stopped for a moment and leaned against the wall. Only a few blocks left, but we didn't want to rush out into some sort of trap.
"Listen" Cody said between deep breaths. There was yelling in the distance and the sound of some sort of animal barking, but it all felt close.
"What?" I asked.
"Footsteps. Behind us."
The darkness was temporarily lifted as disruptor fire flashed past the two of us. We took off around the corner and didn't look back. The yelling was louder as the KDF no doubt figured out where the Hoo-mans were.
We dodged and weaved from one alley to the next, but if the Klingons had any sense, they knew which way we were headed. Fortunately, they didn't know what type of vehicle we had.
I came around the final corner from the alley and into the main road to the dock. No one followed right behind us, but it would only be a short matter of time. Cody hightailed it past me, his ancient type-2 phaser in his hand ready if needed. I had kept my two disruptors in their hiding places so as to concentrate more on running.
More disruptor blasts passed us as we hustled through the many cargo ships and shuttles parked around the dock. The yells in Klingon were growing louder. At least THEY were enjoying the hunt.
Two large red doors open with a red light from the entrance glaring out into the center runway region. Bug. Our best transportation was an old Romulan landing shuttle that we fixed up. It had a small front compartment where one person piloted the vehicle, but a large back with two half domes that came together. They opened up and closed much like how a ladybug opens and closes its wings. So, because we are just brilliant at coming up with names, we simply started calling her "bug."
Cody jumped in and pushed the close button, giving me just enough time to slid in and look back at our pursuers. KDF was coming at us from all sides, firing disruptors. Fortunately, Bug's outer shell was pretty damn tough.
"Hold on back there, it's going to get bumpy!" Zara yelled from the cockpit. Her hood was down and her bright white hair fell down to her shoulders as her antennae wiggled around. They did that when she felt pressure or anxiety.
The pings on the shell grew louder as Zara took us up into the air. Thank goodness we installed more powerful inertia dampers on this baby or we would have been flat on the floor or splatted against the back. Zara wasn't taking any time pulling us away from the dock.
I could hear the chatter over the comm as Zara took us straight down the tube – the way in and out of the asteroid—and the dock workers were scrambling. Just as I was wondering where the Klingon's ship was, it appeared just outside the tube.
"Oh-ho," Zara said, the anxiety in her unsteady voice making it crack just a little. "You guys might want to hang on, this is going to get ugly."
"How ugly?" Cody yelled from the back.
"Like, We're-going-to-blow-up-and-die ugly," Zara answered.
"You got this," I wanted to say. I like to think I'm more brave or strong than I really am. Instead, I just took a deep breath and watched her pilot us through the tube and out past the Bird-of-Prey. Fortunately, they didn't know who we were, yet, but that would change quickly.
"Revanche?" I asked into the comm. "Tsal? You awake out there?"
"Roger, roger, big daddy," Tsal responded. She had once watched an old Earth vid with truckers talking back and forth on those old radios, and she loved it. Ever since, we try to keep her away from communications. "Hear ya loud and clear."
"Get the ship ready to go, Tsal! We're going to be landing in just a few seconds and when we land, I want the Revanche at full warp speed!"
"Smokey on yer tail?" Tsal asked. Cody gave me the strangest look. He hadn't seen the vid with us. Plus, it's just really strange hearing a Vulcan trying to speak with a Southern North American accent.
"Something like that," I answered. "We may have a crew of pissed-off KDF coming after us on a heavy Bird-of-Prey."
"Oh, that's why they were here," Tsal answered. She dropped her accent for a moment, and the familiar light touch of her voice came back out. "I'll let Ukrall know to get the engines warmed up."
Zara did a great job of moving us fast, but not suspiciously fast. About the time we were able to coast in the rear hanger bay and touch down, the comms exploded with angry Klingon voices. They knew what they were looking for. They remembered seeing a small red ship go past. And they knew what general direction it was headed.
I stepped out from Bug and looked out at the open hanger doors just in time to see the stars stretch out and snap back. We hit Warp. The fastest this ship could do was 7, so the KDF could over take us, but we only needed to keep ahead of them for an hour until we crossed the Neutral zone into Federation Territory, then they would have to back off. As long as they didn't ID us, it would be okay. Most of the business we did was in Klingon and Romulan space, and it was expensive to have to forge new documents for business in those territories.
Cody tapped Bug's rear doors lovingly and smiled wide, showing those big white teeth of his. "She came through again," he laughed. "I hope whatever we got from Naurishe was worth it."
"Yeah, me, too," I sighed. We weren't completely out of danger, but it felt much safer than it had a short while ago.
Zara walked past us without a word and moved towards the front of the ship. She seemed angry, but then, she always seemed angry.
"You better get up to the bridge before Tsal pilots us into a black hole or something," I said as I rubbed the back of my neck. Now that the stress was off, I could feel the aches and pains of advancing age catching up to me. Heck, I was only 35, so I shouldn't have felt that way at all, but then, I had lived an interesting life.
Cody nodded and started towards the doors. We had no turbolift of any kind, our ship consisting of only three decks.
Before he passed through, he stopped and turned to me "Will?" he asked. "You think maybe it's time we got some more people? I mean, this ship can hold up to 40. It's kind of wearing us out keeping it crewed with only five."
I nodded. "Gotta see what the boss says," was all I could think to say. I was pretty sure I already knew the answer.