Rachel tried her best to ignore the nagging in the back of her head. 'Jesse' it screamed, and mentally she told it to shut the hell up.
The egging was traumatic, and would forever be etched into her brain. It would be there when she ate, slept, and most unfortunately, sang. Of course there were many incredible heart-break ballads available to sing, but even Rachel Berry, queen of the ballad, was growing tired of the monotonous 'I Will Always Love You' that played without rest in her brain.
She forced herself to concentrate on the rhythmic beat of her of her Mary Jane's on the concrete of the library parking lot, and not on the sweet, gorg-wait no, incredibly disgusting face of a certain lead singer of Vocal Adrenaline.
And much to Rachel's dismay, the thump, thump, thump, eventually turned into a Jesse, Jesse, Jesse.
She did not have time for this reveling, she needed to get new sheet music because, after just a bit of sweet-talking Mr. Schue, he eventually gave in and decided to give her an extra solo for sectionals. The solo rightfully belonged to her anyway, she thought. She was by far the most talented singer in glee club.
The small brunette pushed open the glass doors and hurried inside the warm building. It really was getting chilly. Rachel remembered how it felt to have Jesse hold her when she was cold. Casually she would mention the declining temperature; he would smirk – the smirk that made her swoon – and wrap his arms around her, cuddling her tiny frame into his chest. They would stay like that for a while, until eventually the cuddling would become kissing, kissing would become making-out, and making-out became, well, nothing more than that. Nevertheless, she remembered it fondly.
Before she could tell herself not to, Rachel found herself looking through the Lionel Richie section.
"Dammit, J-" she said aloud, although she couldn't say his name without having a flood of emotions wash over her.
She put the sheet music back and continued down the aisle. She passed Queen, Parton, Osbourne, and eventually made her way to Aguilera without finding a single piece that she felt motivated enough to sing.
At the end of the corridor she saw the piano. The mahogany Kawai piano that changed everything. The piano that started something great, or at least at the time, seemed like something great.
She had to get out of there. She shielded her eyes from anything else that could possibly remind her of 14 raw eggs being thrown at her by a series of heartless singers in a disgusting shade of blue.
She didn't want to admit to herself that part of her, as hidden as it was, was still entirely in love with the blue eyes, curly locks of mouse brown hair, and lips that tasted like peppermint. Unfortunately, all of the parts that she loved were connected to something so terrible she couldn't come to terms with it. She should hate him. She should loathe him, but a small part of her wanted everything to be back to normal. They would walk to glee club together, hand in hand, on top of the world. With all their strength, they would try their best to bear Mr. Schue's terribly beginner class and deal with the imbeciles that attended. After, they would sneak to his incredibly expensive Range Rover, have a quick make-out session, and he would drop her off at home. It was a routine she'd come to absolutely adore.
In all of this debating with herself, she hadn't thought about how she would get home. She didn't have many friends, and her dads were on a date night. She decided to call Finn. Things were a bit rocky between them, but he couldn't deny her a ride home at the very least. She wasn't too sure if it was legal for Finn to be driving after dark, but this worry didn't seem to compare to, what it seemed, the never-ending battle in her head.
She punched speed dial number three and waited for Finn to pick up.
Ring one.
Ring two.
Ring three.
Four.
Five.
"Hey, it's Finn. I'm busy right now, but leave a message and maybe I'll get back to you."
Frustrated, she hung up and started walking home. She had to get back somehow.
So far, the walk home was not much different from it had been in the parking lot. She couldn't stop thinking about Jesse. It had been a week. It was time to let it go. She breathed in deep and tried to clear her mind of anything negative. She breathed deep again. And again. And again, and wa-. Wait what? A dark vehicle slowed down behind her. In these situations, its best to keep walking, Rachel recalled. She quickened her pace and tried her best not to look behind her. Most unfortunate though, the vehicle pressed on.