Tonightless
Chapter I: "You and I"

*I didn't know that Three Rivers was actually located in Philadelphia until AFTER I wrote the story, don't flame for that okay. Also the character is kind of an airhead and a bit of a slut, but not really because she's good-hearted and means well.

I love Tom Hardy so very fucking much it hurts. I even went to go see that shitty Star Trek movie just to see him in it. My name is Mixolydia Charice Jade Fyre; but my friends call me "Lydia" for short. I have very long platinum blond hair that cascades down the back of my supple tan body. I am only eighteen, but people say I am very wise for my age. I once helped my dad pass a litmus test, but that's another story entirely. Anyway, I am five feet-and seven inches tall, I LOVE the color pink and other off/on variants of pink. I love cats and I am a HUGE animal lover! I really, really like anime, but I sometimes think people miss the point of manga; I mean even though I liked it way back before it was mainstream and totally conformist. I have aqua colored eyes with long black eyelashes. I tend to wear coquettish tops and skirts. I have fifty pets; well one of them is my baby Chinese dragon, his name is Muu. I also have a pet bat named Tacquito but he isn't Mexican. Anyway back to my story, I love Tom Hardy so much that I would drop a house on anyone just to be near him, he is so unimaginably perfect! I really admire Lady Gaga, she really is an inspiration and an icon for today's struggling youth. A lot of people say that I look like Lady Gaga, but with Madonna's face. And people are always telling me that I have the energy and spirit of Britney Spears; before she was bald and fat, but after she was pretty again. God I wish I had my own "K-Fed", I would name him 'Gummi' and keep him in my private closet. Later that day I noticed a white moving van outside so I decided to check it out to investigate it. When I stepped outside with my pixie wings on my back and carrying my red Hello Kitty lunchbox, I nearly died when I saw him standing there; it was HIM! It was Tom Fucking Hardy! My heart was going one hundred miles an hour and I was nervous and sweaty all of a sudden. I stood there for a few minutes watching as the Mexican movers carried off his stuff. Rihanna was playing on the radio specifically "S&M" was playing. Oh god now I was even hornier than before, now I felt a tingling sensation down below in my dark zone. It either meant I had to pee or I had Chlamydia (that rhymes with my name). I almost died when I caught him looking at me, I quickly darted behind a tree and checked my pits to be sure they weren't too smelly from the sweat. I sniffed them and they smelled "o.k." I whistled the tune of "All that she wants" and summoned 'Muu'; my turquoise and pink-polka dotted Chinese dragon. He had been watching the Nanny up in the attic where we keep him (he loves Fran Drescher). He talked with a lisp and spits a lot when he spoke. "You sthummoned me your greathness?" he lisped. "Yes Muu, please bring me some deodorant, I can't leave because if I do Tom might see me." I ordered. "Oh my gothsh Tom Harthy is here!" Muu squawked. "Keep it down!" I ordered. "Yes, he's over thereunpacking. Now please hurry!" I commanded. "Don'th worry sthweetie, you can count on me!" Muu lipsed before disappearing in a puff of pink smoke. I know he looks, sounds, and acts EXTREMELY gay but he isn't, Muu is actually straight and is dating a Hispanic woman named 'Esperanza'. I peeked around the tree; the van was still there, the movers still carrying boxes of stuff but no sign of Tom. "Damn!" I said under my breath. "Damn what?" Tom asked, coming around the other side of the tree. "Oh my god!" I cried. "Are you okay?" he asked. I nodded bervously, "Y-Y-Yes J-J-Just a little G-G-Gardening." I stuttered. Shit! I always stutter whenever I am nervous. "Is that a hello kitty lunchbox; did you have lunch yet?" He asked. "N-N-N-No G-G-G-G-G-God D-D-D-D-D-Dammit!" I stuttered. "Did I upset you?" He wondered. "N-No, J-Just my nerves; I S-S-Stutter W-When I'm N-Nervous." I explained. "That's so cute!" He said with a smile. "T-Thanks…" I said, feeling better about the god-awful stuttering. "My name is Isidore, what is yours?" He asked. "My name is – WHAT!" I freaked out, "Isidore? You're Tom Fucking Hardy!" I yelled. "No, my name is Isidore Polish (like nail polish ), I just moved here from Chicago." He explained. "I guess that explains the lack of an English accent." I acknowledged. Actually, come to think of it this guy looked a lot more different than Tom than I thought. Firstly, he had jet black hair and was slender and hot like before Tom gained all of that weight, went bald, and got a porn-star sheriff moustache for that one movie. Secondly, his eyes were yellow like a cat's, whereas Tom's were green or some kind of blue. Thirdly, he was like younger than Tom or something close to my age – but more or less he still looked like Tom, especially those hot lips attached to that hot mouth. "So…?" "So?" I replied. "Your name?" he asked. "Oh sorry; I'm Lydia!" I said cheerfully. "You're not one of those annoying cheery Final Fantasy type of girl are you?" he asked. "No…." I Hesitated, and died a lottle inside. "That's good because their optimism depresses me; I mean it really pisses me off, especially that Vanille girl." Isidore ranted. "I agree…?" I said, dying even more inside. This guy was becoming more of a fuckwad-buzzkill by the second. "So…anything else you hate?" "What?" he asked. "Who?" I replied. "When?" he said. "Lunch?" I asked. "Here?" He wondered. "Okay!" I cheered. Crimson and Clover played on the radio as I sexily opened up my red hello kitty lunchbox, and coyly took out a pink table cloth and neatly laid it atop of the grass. I carefully reached in and retrieved a zip-lock bag of muffins I had made. "Wanna try my muffin?" I asked innocently. "I'd love to try your muffin." He replied. I handed him a blueberry muffin while I coyly nibbled on a strawberry one. I stretched my legs out and bit my lip as I watched him eat a small portion of his muffin; carefully licking an edge of it with his pink tongue before taking a bite. "I like your lunchbox." He said, "It's cute." "Thank you." I replied. "Do you ever pack any meat in there?" He asked. I giggled, "I pack a lot of meat in my lunchbox." I said licking my lips. "Does it ever get cramped inside of there?" He wondered. "Nuh-uh." I said, "There's plenty of room."
"That's good." He said, "Maybe I will let you hold my pepperoni in there someday." He suggested with a wink. "Yes of course!" I chimed, "Someday that is…" I added. Just then there was a burst of purple and pink confetti and Muu appeared holding a bar of Dove Women's deodorant. "I'm heeeeere!" He announced. "You're late!" I yelled. "Sthorry sthweetie, I waths caught up in ma stories." He explained. "God! You are impossible sometimes!" I chided him. "Here ya go sthweetie!" He said tossing the bar of deodorant to me. "Just beat it okay, I'm on a date!" I hollered at him. Muu gasped, "Oh my gad sthweetie I had no idea! I'll leave at oneths!" he said disappearing into thin air. I returned my attention to Isidore; "Now where were we?" I asked with a coy smile. "Lydia?" "Yes?" I replied. "You called it a date?" He exclaimed. "I did?" "Yes you did." He confirmed. "Aw snap G I'm sorry!" I apologized, "Home-boy meany no disrespect." "What are you doing?" He asked. "I talk in ebonics whenever I am apologetic home-dog." I explained. "Shit Lydia, for a cute-looking girl you sure have a lot of fucked up problems." Isidore said kinda judgmentally. "Oh gee I'm…" "That's why I LIKE you even more now." He continued. My heart soared again; "What?" I asked. "Yea, I'm REALLY fucked up too!" He admitted. "Well I wouldn't label myself as 'fucked up'." I said, "I prefer to call them 'cute tics'." I corrected him. "Come on Lydia, let me show you MY 'cute tics'." He said helping me to my feet.